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Cleveland: The Real Mudville

By C. Robert Dimitri | Posted Under Miscellaneous | Comments (42)



alg_lebron_james.jpg

A good friend that I met in college is an enthusiastic sports fan. That alone is of course not a notable statement; I made several friends in college, and I shared our great cultural obsession for the professional sports world with most of them. There is, however, something noteworthy about this guy. Given all the jawing about sports that he and I have done over the years, in my mind it has assumed the status of perhaps his most defining characteristic.

He was born in Cleveland.

I could simply leave it at that and end this column right there. In this context, that sentence is a punch line all by itself. You do not need to be a sports historian to reflect upon the last 45 years and realize that Cleveland sports success — or at least the ultimate success as opposed to heartbreak on the occasional brink thereof — is nonexistent. Given the demographics of those who frequent this website, “reflecting upon the last 45 years” is likely not even an option for you, and if the Cleveland successes that preceded that interval are within your memory, then we are probably reaching way back into your childhood when the primary means of broadcast for sporting events was the radio.

No, this sprawling tale does not have a happy ending, or at least not one that has occurred yet.

The 1940s and 1950s were an exciting time for the Cleveland sports fan. 1948 saw a World Series title for the Indians. In 1954 the Indians returned to the Series as favorites to win with an American League record 111 wins, but they fell in a four-game sweep to Willie Mays and the New York Giants, highlighted by Mays’ amazing and oft-replayed over-the-shoulder catch in the outfield in game one. In the pre-Super Bowl era, the Cleveland Browns won NFL championships in 1950, 1954, 1955, and 1964. They were league runners-up in 1951, 1952, 1953, 1957, and 1965.

It all went downhill from there. That play by Mays came to be known simply as “The Catch.” (This Cowboys fan will choose at this time to ignore any other plays that acquired that title almost 30 years later.) Over the subsequent years, Cleveland would find itself the victim of many other situations that earned that dreaded article “the” in their monikers.

In January of 1987 the Cleveland Browns had claimed the top seed in the AFC playoffs. Hosting the AFC Championship game, the Browns fell victim to “The Drive,” in which John Elway orchestrated the Denver Broncos offense 98 yards down the field for a game-tying touchdown with 37 seconds remaining. The Broncos would win in overtime.

A year later in the AFC Championship game of 1988, the Browns would have their chance at redemption. This time they were playing in Denver, and they engineered their own last-minute drive that could have tied the game. With one minute and twelve seconds left in the game, Cleveland running back Earnest Byner committed “The Fumble” at the three-yard line. Woe had visited Cleveland yet again.

In 1989 the Cleveland Cavaliers joined this dirge. The Cavs entered the league as an expansion team in 1970. They were contenders in that time but never champions. In ‘89 they were the third seed in the NBA’s Eastern Conference and were matched against the sixth-seeded Chicago Bulls in the first round of the playoffs (a best-of-five series back then). The Bulls had not defeated the Cavs in six tries over the course of the regular season, but they pushed the Cavs to a fifth game in Cleveland. A thrilling back-and-forth culminated in Michael Jordan’s “The Shot,” a buzzer beater taken over Craig Ehlo that was the third lead change in the final six seconds of the game and one of the top highlights of Jordan’s storied career. The Bulls would not win the championship for another two years, but this was the beginning of their rise to power, and in 1992 they turned the Cavaliers away again in the Eastern Conference finals.

What were the Cleveland Indians doing all this time? They were losing a ridiculous amount of games. Between 1960 and 1993 they achieved lofty levels of ignominy in their cellar-dwelling with no hint of contention for a division title in all that time. Hollywood even immortalized their franchise in 1989 with the movie Major League, dubbing them the archetypal example of a sports Cinderella.

The Indians turned things around shortly thereafter with two World Series appearances in 1995 and 1997. As the city had come to expect, though, losses to the Braves and Marlins, respectively, were the result. That seven-game loss to the Marlins was particularly painful. Here were the Marlins, a new expansion team in 1993, winning a title with only four years of history. What did they know about the blood, sweat, and tears that the Cleveland Indians endured the previous 49 years? How dare they secure their game-seven victory with an extra inning hit by Edgar Renteria that some called “The Single”? (That one apparently was not as catchy as the others.)

Meanwhile, back in the realm of football, Cleveland Browns Art Modell was committing what I will call “The Desertion.” Modell moved the team to Baltimore after the 1995 season and renamed them the Ravens. The announcement was made early in the ‘95 season and prompted lawsuits and death threats against Modell. The city eventually secured a promise from the league that they would receive the next available expansion team as a replacement, and they were allowed to keep their team records of the preceding decades rather than seeing them follow the team to Baltimore.

Cleveland received that new Browns team in 1999, but three years without football engendered much bitterness. In January of 2001 the Baltimore Ravens advanced to the Super Bowl. I watched that game with my Cleveland friend. Thinking that there might still be former Browns on the Ravens team, I asked him if he could be happy for the Ravens at all. I do not recall if there actually were any former Browns on that team, but I have never seen any sports fan more vehemently opposed to the prospect of any team winning a game than he was opposed to the idea of the Ravens winning that Super Bowl, and I have shared company with fans stirred up by Blue Devils-Tar Heels, Longhorns-Sooners, Lakers-Celtics, and many of the other most divisive rivalries that sports has to offer. (Sorry, Cleveland: the Ravens did win that one.)

Of course, “The Decision” is the most recent blotch on Cleveland’s sports history. I need not say too much about LeBron James’ primetime television special in which the top superstar publicly abandoned his team and home state for a free agent contract with the Miami Heat, as it has been scrutinized and dissected far more than was warranted. We probably should have concluded that there was no chance James would stay in Cleveland based on his favorite baseball and football teams (the Yankees and Cowboys, i.e., arguably the two largest sports bandwagons this country has to offer). James was well within his rights to leave, but the manner of presentation and lack of consideration for his Ohio fans were gauche, and James admitted a few weeks ago that in hindsight he should have handled the announcement differently.

I myself initially thought it would have been a nice story if James had stayed with the Cavaliers rather than moving on to a more prominent NBA market city. This past weekend I saw footage of Cincinnati Bengals receiver Chad Ochocinco asking a very young Cleveland boy — probably not more than five or six years old — about his favorite basketball player. The kid chose Kobe Bryant. Prodding from a parent indicated that LeBron James was the kid’s former favorite player. A disillusioned young child must be one of the more heartrending sights this universe has to offer, even if his disillusionment follows merely from the ever-shifting reality of free agency in professional sports.

However, when I consider the narrative that the city of Cleveland has acquired over the last few decades, James’ departure seems a fitting addition to the tale. It is another badge of honor for the city. The shared adversity of Cleveland fans will only make them stronger. An eventual championship in whichever sport will not come easily, but it will be an earned and hard-fought title and quite the catharsis after all this time for the Cleveland fans.

I have joked with my friend that he enjoys the aforementioned movie Major League so much because it is a representation of wish fulfillment for him. That movie leaves no need for the ritual annual sacrifice of his Cleveland Browns doll. Having that fictional team to support might enable him to engage in a little “smack talk, “something that I have never heard him practice in support of his teams in all my years of knowing him. That might not be his style regardless, but what cause have Cleveland fans had for true, sustainable bravado in their recent history?

Major League opens with a mournful tune by Randy Newman called “Burn On,” as the perennial losing of the Indians is chronicled via montage. I like to use the lyrics in jesting email taunts to my friend whenever something else goes wrong for Cleveland sports. I only recently learned the story behind that 1972 tune.

The Cuyahoga River in Cleveland was so polluted with detritus and oil that the river itself was known to catch on fire. It did so several times between 1868 and 1952. A fire in 1969 proved particularly embarrassing for the city, spurring negative attention from Time magazine and partially inspiring the environmental movement of the early 1970s.

A river aflame is a jarring and paradoxical image to consider. Going all the way back to the Tigris and Euphrates rivers in the ancient human-populated region of the Middle East known as the Fertile Crescent, rivers have represented the lifeblood of human civilization. The Cuyahoga River was no less critical in the development of the city of Cleveland and its commerce. Water should be a given. Water should be pure and available. Likewise, a city deserves at least the occasional parade in honor of its victorious sports team.

I have never been to Cleveland, but I hope its long-suffering sports fans are able to hold that parade soon.

C. Robert Dimitri is nothing more than your average American sports fan that has spent far too many hours in front of the television and has absolutely no further credentials. He reserves the right to change any opinions expressed here; unlike the practice of bandwagon sports loyalty, there is virtue in shifting a position when given new information.









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Comments

sorry you can get no sympathy as long as there are Philadelphia Eagles fans around.

Posted by: blacksred at November 17, 2010 2:11 PM

I have been to Cleveland many times. My mom was born there and most of her family still lives there. So, I have a grandma, aunts, uncles, and cousins (and now my cousin's kids) still living there.

I do feel bad for them. I was actually in Cleveland a few years back the night the Cavaliers beat the Pistons in the Eastern Conference Finals. I remember sleeping in the bedroom of my grandmother's house, hearing fireworks going off, people cheering and dancing in the streets, all of that. It was as close to the "top" that any of those fans had been at since the Indians lost in World Series in 1997. Even my 90 year old grandmother started talking trash to me, since I'm from Detroit. Sadly, that didn't end well for them and now they continue to suffer.

Because of my mom's roots/family and the fact that my brother is a Cleveland Browns fan (it was either that or being a Lions fan), I've always pulled for the Cleveland teams.

As bleak as it's been rooting for the Lions for the last 30+ years, at least the Pistons have won 3 championships, the Tigers won in 1984, Michigan won a National Championship in football in 1997, and my beloved Red Wings have won 4 Cups and have been the best frnachise in the NHL for the last 15+ years. I can live with that.

Posted by: FordbiddenDonut at November 17, 2010 2:13 PM

P.S. Cleveland does not even have a hockey team.

Posted by: C. Robert Dimitri at November 17, 2010 2:15 PM

No, Philly. A single team sucking at a single sport for an extended period of time is one thing (see Cubs, Chicago). But Philly has World Series wins and Chicago just added a Stanley Cup to the multitude of NBA Championships won at the United Center.

Cleveland sucks at everything.

Posted by: Yossarian at November 17, 2010 2:15 PM

sorry you can get no sympathy as long as there are Philadelphia Eagles fans around.

Posted by: blacksred at November 17, 2010 2:11 PM

Eagles fans? Puhleaze...

You don't even know what pain is.

How many Superbowls have the Eagles been in? How many playoff games have they won in the last 50 years?

If the answer to either of those questions is "more than one", take a number.

Posted by: FordbiddenDonut at November 17, 2010 2:17 PM

P.S. Cleveland does not even have a hockey team.

Posted by: C. Robert Dimitri at November 17, 2010 2:15 PM

Not only that, I have noticed that many people in Cleveland actually have a disdain for hockey. Perhaps that is why they fail. Their hearts are too hard.

If so, maybe they have it comin'...

One also cannot ignore the fact that there are far too many Ohio State Buckeye fans in Cleveland. That doesn't help anything.

Posted by: FordbiddenDonut at November 17, 2010 2:19 PM

I don't know much about the Browns, but I always root for them. They're such underdogs, I can't help it. Unless they play the Ravens-I'm an Eagles girl, but the boyfriend has converted me to a sort of Ravens admirer :) They're AFC so I don't feel like I'm cheating on my team.

I always feel for sports towns that go championship free for a long time. The Phillies' World Series win made that sting go away, and will for a while. That feeling of elation is just so FUN, I hope for Cleveland fans that they get to experience it sometime soon.

Posted by: Julie at November 17, 2010 2:21 PM

I could be your friend. I grew up in Canton, OH and really still can't talk about "The Drive" and "The Fumble". I was also extremely bitter towards the Ravens for many years.

I've been out of the area for about 12 years now, but my brother is still suffering as a loyal fan of all three teams. Bless his heart.

Posted by: jillster85 at November 17, 2010 2:22 PM

And yeah I agree-Eagles fans, though I may be one, are not exactly the longest suffering around. We get close and then bitch slapped, yes, but at least we usually have something to cheer about.

Posted by: Julie at November 17, 2010 2:23 PM

I grew up in Kentucky, the pro sports wasteland, and never developed any loyalties (or interest in pro sports whatsoever).

I now live in Cleveland, and it's an amazing experience being an outsider on the scene these last few years.

I love talking to the locals:

"I heard the Indians didn't win the world series. Hey, at least it was still a USA victory, right?"

"Calves? Who thought veal would make a good mascot?"

"Wait, I always switch them up. Are the Browns foosball or quidditch?"

Posted by: ShagearedVillain at November 17, 2010 2:32 PM

I too have been in Cleveland many times. My dad was born there and much of that side of my family lives there. I remember when Cleveland beat the Nets (I'm from Jersey...where we take solace in the fact that the Giants and Jets play in Jersey, and the Devils have won the Stanley Cup a couple of times in the past 15 years. Also I'm a Yankees fan bc Jersey doesn't have a baseball team). Anyway, when the Cavaliers beat the Nets in the playoffs I was upset, but happy for my cousins who were/are big Cavaliers fans. I even got to go to a Cavaliers game and watch LeBron play. Cleveland has it tough. None of their teams now have any prospects of winning a championship in the near future.

I understand LeBron wants to win. But still his decision wasn't just in bad taste. I honestly think it was a bad decision. He should've waited. Cleveland could win a championship. Even if Miami wins (they won't this year...probably next year though), what does it matter? LeBron's legacy will always be tarnished. He's done. Forever behind Jordan and Bryant.

Posted by: Littlejon2001 at November 17, 2010 2:33 PM

We get close and then bitch slapped, yes, but at least we usually have something to cheer about.

Posted by: Julie at November 17, 2010 2:23 PM

A certain, recent MNF game comes to mind, I bet?

Dang it all.

/Redskins fan

Posted by: Rykker at November 17, 2010 2:45 PM

I know nothing about sports.

What I do know is that Cleveland is a fantastic city.

It saddens me that we've been judged by so harshly our shitty sports and a shitty sitcom starring a now weight fluctuating Republican game show host.

We have awesome food. We have one of the best orchestras in the world. We have one of the best Hospitals in the world. An amazing devotion to theatre. We have the West side fucking Market.

Posted by: Natalia at November 17, 2010 2:51 PM

Born & bred in Cleveland, which means I lived through the 1990s disappointments.

While I thank you for your sympathy, I guess for me, it's a bit more shameful to be the recipient of actual PITY. I love Cleveland, and not through some sort of martyred pride -- it's a great city that has a large number of its own merits to stand on, including the fact that we actually have sports teams in the three major American sports, even if they often break our hearts. But I can't deal with when people use the sports teams' varied failures over the years as a metaphor for the city's fortunes. You're not exactly making that connection, but it often comes up, and I think it's severely unfair.

Statistically speaking, one day we will win a damned championship. I really hope it's during my lifetime so that I can join in what will be an insane celebration, but Clevelanders aren't walking around hanging their heads every day -- they're living their lives, which are filled with art, community, music, great food, and yes, rooting for some up-and-down sports teams.

Of course, Clevelanders definitely have an inferiority complex, and so will be the first to tell you the things that suck about the city. But it's like when someone insults your sister -- we don't take that well to others criticizing it!

Posted by: Abby at November 17, 2010 2:55 PM

As a Saints fan who finally got to live the dream last February, all I can say is: hang in there Cleveland! Trust me, it is as good as you imagine it will be!

Posted by: Fredo at November 17, 2010 2:55 PM

Natalia -- word.

And points for being way way more concise than me! I'm not in Cleveland now, and man do I miss good pierogies and stuffed cabbage! And I spent all my childhood going to plays & musicals -- when I got to college, I couldn't believe that wasn't everyone's upbringing. Not to mention when I found out that not everyone had something like Cedar Point nearby...

Posted by: Abby at November 17, 2010 3:01 PM

I lived in Columbus during my high school and college years, and my parents still are there so I am back frequently. I moved there at 15. Columbus is the NFL battle line so I immediately was forced to declare my loyalty to the Bengals or Browns. It was an easy decision. Bengals fans were insufferable.

I was there for the Drive and the Fumble. As far as I know he was born with the name is John Fucking Elway, cause I've never actually heard him called anything else in OH. I had moved away by the time Satan himself moved the Browns to Baltimore, but it hurt nonetheless. I know it has gotten more play but the Decision was a mere scratch compared to the gutting that was the Move.

Yeah, Cleveland is Mudville.

Posted by: ed newman at November 17, 2010 3:04 PM

I'm from Akron, OH (35 minutes south of Cleveland) and the Broncos win over the Browns is my earliest sports memory. It's been difficult to be a fan, but you're absolutely right when you say, "The shared adversity of Cleveland fans will only make them stronger." You don't even know how right you are.

Thank you for this moving piece. You could not have written this better even if you were from Cleveland.

Posted by: superasente at November 17, 2010 3:06 PM

http://sports.espn.go.com/new-york/nfl/news/story?id=5816234

Most New York sports fans are insufferable assholes, especially considering how many sports titles that city has accumulated, so this story is especially distasteful. Not only are Cleveland fans psychologically pounded every year, now jerkoff-fuckwad Jets fans are beating the shit out of their children.

Posted by: Kballs at November 17, 2010 3:08 PM

Thanks, Abby!

I'm pretty darn proud to be in the progressive hub of Ohio.

Posted by: Natalia at November 17, 2010 3:17 PM

One former Browns player that I know for certain was on the 2000 Ravens team was kicker Matt Stover. I thought Ray Lewis might have been initially drafted by the Browns, but he was actually the first ever player selected by the Ravens.

I'm from Pittsburgh and a Steeler fan so I hate the Browns (and really the entire city of Cleveland) pretty much out of obligation. Even so, Steeler fans wore orange arm bands for their game in Pittsburgh in 1995 as a show of solidarity with their biggest and oldest rival. Even us Steel City folk feel bad for them sometimes.

Posted by: L4NkYb at November 17, 2010 3:19 PM

L4NkYb, you're from Pittsburgh? Wow. Sorry, man.

Posted by: superasente at November 17, 2010 3:32 PM

Aw, Rykker-that was a brutal one. I say with a grin on my face :p

Posted by: Julie at November 17, 2010 3:41 PM

superasente, it could be worse. I could be from Cleveland.

But just to show we're not so different, my earliest sports memory is being forced to go to bed before the end of game 7 of the 1992 NLCS, and then waking up the next morning to find out the Pirates weren't going to the World Series. I'm told my sister cried. We didn't get NLCS tickets because my parents said they'd get World Series tickets that year if the Bucs made it. Every Pirate fan my age (all four of us!) has a similar story.

Posted by: L4NkYb at November 17, 2010 4:13 PM

Cleveland is indeed a miserable wasteland when it comes to sports, and I always thought it was kind of a shit town. Then I went there for a wedding.

It's actually pretty fucking cool. Plus, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is awesome.

But the sports teams. Yeesh. Horrific. You poor bastards.

Posted by: TK at November 17, 2010 4:15 PM

Dont think I forgot where I come from dawg cuz I know- Cleveland Ohio fo sho-where we slung dope in tha snow!

Posted by: Vorax at November 17, 2010 4:32 PM

Kballs, you do realize it was a Browns fan who tackled a 8-year old Jets fan right???????

Your post made it seem like it was the other way around.

Posted by: Littlejon2001 at November 17, 2010 5:16 PM

I was born and raised in Cleveland and I loved this post! I remember my dad weeping when the Indians made it to the World Series in 1995. I can't wait for the day when one of the teams gets a big win. The big win. It'll mean everything to that city.

Posted by: SCannakate at November 17, 2010 6:09 PM

I too am from Akron Ohio. I may spend my Sundays rooting for a losing team, but tailgating in Cleveland through the cold, snow and rain is the best part of fall/winter. And one of these days I'll be able to say I was behind our teams when we win it all.

Ok back to dreaming, drinking and lurking.

Posted by: Mistified at November 17, 2010 6:52 PM

Posted by: Ken Hart at November 17, 2010 7:28 PM

Born and raised Clevelander...diehard for all 3 teams and yes it sucks we haven't seen a parade in my generation. That said, Cleveland does not want your pity, maybe just your understanding, and possibly your money if you'd like to visit here and realize there's more to this city than lousy sports teams. When one of our teams finally breaks thru, the lid's gonna blow off this town. I can't wait...

Posted by: stryker1121 at November 17, 2010 8:45 PM

superasente,

And to think I used to like you, ya jagoff.

Posted by: , at November 17, 2010 9:08 PM

I grew up outside of Cleveland and agreed:

"That said, Cleveland does not want your pity, maybe just your understanding, and possibly your money if you'd like to visit here and realize there's more to this city than lousy sports teams."

Like that dude in Away We Go said, I had an epic childhood. I grew on on Lake Erie, a great lake, not one of those sad little excuses for lakes that some other states have. I spent summers watersking, running through the woods, and riding down actual mudslides on the beach. I spent winters sledding and snowmobiling and going to see the Nutcracker in Cleveland's Playhouse Square theater. I went to Browns games, Indians games, Cavs games and even a Cleveland Lumberjacks game (we used to have an IHL team, now we have an AHL team).

Cleveland has an awesome orchestra, a great art museum, a great natural history museum, and one of the better zoos in the United States. It's near Cedar Point (and also agreed, I pity people who had to grow up near amusement parks that only have 2 or 3 roller coasters - how sad!), and the Lake Erie Islands. Yeah, our lake has islands on it; islands big enough that people build houses on them, bars on them, and wineries on them.

When I left Ohio for college I was shocked to find that people outside of Ohio seem to have no realistic concept of Cleveland whatsoever. When I came back to Ohio for grad school I was even more shocked to meet a new grad school classmate from the South (an intelligent dude! High GRE scores!) who was CERTAIN that the Cuyahoga River had caught on fire "just a few years ago" (this was 1999). I then proceeded to spend grad school enjoying the incredible Cuyahoga Valley Recreation Area.

People can rag on Cleveland sports teams all they want, but if that's the basis for their understanding of Cleveland in general, they are sorely mistaken.

Posted by: idrathernotsay at November 17, 2010 9:58 PM

oh boo hoo. try being a Seattle fan. having Griffey, A-Rod, Randy Johnson, and Edgar Martinez on the same team and never winning a pennant? check. tying the single-season wins record and not even making it to the World Series? check. losing the most questionably-officiated Super Bowl of all time? check. having the only champion in the city move to fucking Oklahoma for no reason other than that the owners wanted to (which was the real life version of Major League, except the bad guys won, so suck it Cleveland)? check.

I understand no one's paid any attention to Seattle since 1999, but still.

Posted by: ivn at November 17, 2010 10:57 PM

P.S. Cleveland does not even have a hockey team.

Posted by: C. Robert Dimitri at November 17, 2010 2:15 PM

Not only that, I have noticed that many people in Cleveland actually have a disdain for hockey. Perhaps that is why they fail. Their hearts are too hard.

Posted by: FordbiddenDonut at November 17, 2010 2:19 PM

First of all, the Lake Erie Monsters are an AHL team in Cleveland. Yeah, it's not NHL, but it's still a farm team, and they still have serious fans, so suck it.

Secondly, you're confusing hating hockey with hating Pittsburgh. Northeastern Ohio has tons of hockey fans...we just don't root for the Columbus Blue Jackets (who blow). A large percentage of hockey fans in NEO root for the Penguins, and the Cleveland hatred of Pittsburgh runs deep, even if there isn't an NHL team to rival against, or, let's face it, a true football rivalry anymore.

Posted by: alison at November 17, 2010 11:04 PM

Thanks for all the great comments.

Abby & Natalia >> Very well said.

superasente >> Thank you for the kind words.

Kballs >> Pretty horrible story. There seems to be the potential for trouble like that at any NFL stadium, but that incident is especially shameful.

Ken Hart >> In spite of the wonderful traits of Cleveland that Natalia, Abby, and Idrathernotsay describe above, that was a funny video.

ivn >> After writing this I thought about Seattle, and they do have a very bad beat as well that is worse than Cleveland's in some ways. That Supersonics championship is not a recent memory, and the Mariners and Seahawks both could use a title.

alison >> I offer my apologies for neglecting the Lake Erie Monsters and the AHL in my comment and focusing only on the major leagues. It was a quickly written addendum in reaction to the fact that I have once again failed to write about hockey in this column. I haven't seen the Monsters play, but I did enjoy a minor league hockey game back in the day.

Thanks again, everyone! I hope that no one took my column as one that equates the state of professional sports with the value of a city. If losing builds character, Cleveland must have lots of character. Joking aside, the success or failure of our sports franchises might give us something to talk about, add to a general mood, and even inspire for the better, but in the grand scheme the results should not be weighted too heavily.

Posted by: C. Robert Dimitri at November 18, 2010 2:08 AM

Were you born and/or spent a large portion of your life living in Dallas? Because if you haven't and still self-identify as a Cowboys fan, then you, sir, are a f***wad.

Posted by: Endgame at November 18, 2010 9:57 AM

Great Lakes Brewing Co.

"Burning River"

Mmmmm.

Posted by: , at November 18, 2010 11:19 AM

Endgame >> And you, sir, are rude. I did not live in Dallas proper, but - as you might be aware - Texas is a fairly large state. I spent the plurality of my life in a relatively small Texas city whose closest NFL location was Dallas. Is that justification enough for your delicate sensibilities?

Posted by: C. Robert Dimitri at November 18, 2010 11:45 AM

Used to work for the Browns, currently work for the Cavs... it's not as miserable as you'd think really.

When we finally win something of significance, I'd be willing to bet that we figure out how to set fire to that river again too.

Posted by: BELIEVEland at November 18, 2010 3:17 PM

Mike Polk (maker of that "hastily made cleveland tourism video") can eat a dick. Clevelanders like him unapologetically feed into the inferiority complex that the city has - and the attitude is fucking contagious. Never imagined that a city's population would so readily jump at that chance to shit on its home town any chance they get. Read travel reviews of outsiders who come here and it's full of people who are pleasantly surprised, who really like it, say it's far better than its reputation, and most tellingly, can't understand why the natives are always putting it down.

So yeah: Eat a dick, Mike Polk.

Posted by: Matches at November 19, 2010 1:26 AM

"It saddens me that we've been judged by so harshly our shitty sports and a shitty sitcom starring a now weight fluctuating Republican game show host."

Hey now, the first couple seasons of The Drew Carey Show were fantastic. And he's great as the host of TPIR, I don't care what you say. He loves Cleveland and his hometown of Parma, and his loyalty to the city is not lost on us. Most importantly, Drew Carey is NOT a republican...he's a libertarian.

He's awesome. And so is Cleveland.

Posted by: Jen at November 21, 2010 10:27 AM