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Anne of Green Gables Is a God Damned Fashion Icon

By Rebecca Pahle | Miscellaneous | September 29, 2015 | Comments ()

By Rebecca Pahle | Miscellaneous | September 29, 2015 |


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Apparently, until last Saturday, I was the only twenty- to thirtysomething woman (…twentysomething. Definitely twentysomething.) who had yet to watch Anne of Green Gables and Anne of Avonlea, the ’80s pair* of miniseries(es?) based on the classic children’s series by L.M. Montgomery. Somehow I—a red-headed, frecklefaced youth with an overactive imagination, albeit sadly not Canadian—had missed out on the adventures of my literary doppelganger. What can I say? I was a Little House girl.

When I wasn’t swooning over Gilbert

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(m’lady)

in raptures over bitch headmistress

wincing at Professor Pedo

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or lunging at the screen to try and punch Mr. Fuckbubble here in the face

I was in losing my shit over the clothes, which are early 20th century Canada through the lens of Dynasty. Every single item I want to either burn or wear every day, all at once, like an Edwardian Era Canadian burrito.

Anne is wearing a FULL-LENGTH PLAID CAPE.

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I, too, am shocked at your lace turtleneck, Anne!

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She may not have enough fabric for shoulders, but God dammit, she will have those puffed sleeves.

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Dying her hair green: Accident, or Coney Island seapunk c. 2011?

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Who’s going to bring the bolero back?

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Fuck boleros, who’s going to bring capes back?

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Antonio Banderas, I believe in you. Capes aren’t good for superhero-ing, obviously—the Gospel of Edna taught us that much—but I am honest-to-God angry that this is not on my shoulders right now:

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Why Anne, how very wandering-on-the-moors-screaming-GILBERT-GILLLLLLBEERRTTTT of you!

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“This doesn’t look too ’80s.”

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OH GOD NO.

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If anyone can pull the double-decker braid off, it’s Anne-with-an-E Shirley.

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Someone in Brooklyn is wearing this exact outfit at this very moment.

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“Seriously, Emmeline, get the fuck over it, whatever it is.”

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The fashion accessory every Canadian woman needs: Young Kids in the Hall castmembers.

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“I meant I wanted more Ruffles the chips.”

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I would absolutely wear this:

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…I would wear this too, don’tlookatme:

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This is so Harlequin romance novel cover, and I am loving every single bit of it.

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LOVE IS REAL:

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You bring the raspberry cordials, I’ll bring the plum pudding sauce with dead mouse particles for flavor. Let’s geek the fuck out.

*I did not watch Anne of Green Gables: The Continuing Story. I have been told it is “the Godfather Part 3 of miniseries.”


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