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All the Ways In Which People Just Don't Get UT Austin's 'Open Dildo Carry' Movement

By Vivian Kane | Miscellaneous | October 12, 2015 |

By Vivian Kane | Miscellaneous | October 12, 2015 |



Over the summer, Texas Governor Greg Abbott signed the “Campus Carry” law, making it legal to carry a concealed handgun on college campuses. As you might expect, a lot of students are really pissed off. There have been a number of protests at UT Austin, using public forums to urge the school’s president to enforce heavy regulations of the law (which is allowed). But another group is taking a more unusual route for their protest: dildos.

A UTA student named Jessica Jin has started a Facebook event page for a Campus (DILDO) Carry protest. As she puts it,

The State of Texas has decided that it is not at all obnoxious to allow deadly concealed weapons in classrooms, however it DOES have strict rules about free sexual expression, to protect your innocence. You would receive a citation for taking a DILDO to class before you would get in trouble for taking a gun to class. Heaven forbid the penis.

Yes, in the eyes of Texas law, a sex toy is more dangerous— or at least more worth an arrest or fine and the time and energy of law enforcement— than a gun. So Jin wants as many students as possible to strap “gigantic swinging dildos to our backpacks in protest of campus carry.”

ANYBODY can participate in solidarity: alum, non-UT students, people outside of Texas. Come one dildo, come all dildos.

“You’re carrying a gun to class? Yeah well I’m carrying a HUGE DILDO.”

Just about as effective at protecting us from sociopathic shooters, but much safer for recreational play.

#CocksNotGlocks


The responses have been all over the place: a lot of support, a LOT of Brits chiming in to make sure we know how stupid our gun laws look to everyone in the UK (WE KNOW), and then— of course— a whole bunch of people losing their goddamned minds. Jin said in the event page itself that she’ll be leaving the trolls in plain view.

For the time being, I am leaving abusive posts up in order for everybody to see them and understand the misogyny, fear, abuse, and hatred that a harmless dildo can incite. It is proof in plain sight that assertions that the general public can remain calm while in possession of firearms in tense situations, when they can’t even handle a a dildo, might be a bit off.
“A bit off” seems like one hell of an understatement, as the negative comments range from the expected “This is retarded” and “Go kill yourselves” to more aggressive idiocy. Like the person who stand behind his belief that guns > urine.

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Or this person who want us to WAKE UP and forget about the open carry stuff. The real problem with this country is our “muslin” president and all the ISIS guys being let in to the country and—oh, I’m sorry. What were we talking about again?

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Or this mega troll who is all over the comments with sexist douchebaggery, but also took the time to use a Marx quote to insult “leftists.”

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Perhaps my very favorite, though, is this person who spelled out the entire point of the protest pretty well.

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Yes, think about how that Mormon would feel! Probably pretty similar to how most students would feel sitting behind someone with a gun in their backpack. You know, if you replace their moral discomfort with legitimate fear for your life.

By and large, though, most of the criticisms come from people who are so dense that they really think this protest is about using dildos to fend off campus shooters. Yup, these women with their heads stuffed full of liberal book learning think a sex toy will save their lives.

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I REALLY wish that last one was the only person who thought these women are just begging to be raped by displaying a sex toy. But not even close.

To be clear: NO ONE THINKS A DILDO WILL STOP A SHOOTER. But neither will the kid next to you in Intro to Psychology with a handgun in his backpack. But knowing the latter is there, or could be there, WILL make a lot of students feel unsafe in their schools.

The event isn’t scheduled until next summer. In the meantime, good sex toys are expensive, so they’re looking for donors. (..Of money, if that wasn’t clear.)