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This is How I Quit the Internet

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | March 9, 2014 | Comments ()


TrueDetectiveFinale5Shows.jpg

Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey on Fox at 9:00pm ET.

Resurrection on ABC at 9:00pm ET. Series premiere. I’ve spent some of my weekend watching the show this is based on, The Returned (Les Revenants if you want to be French about it) which is lovely and subtly creepy, and very good about letting the mystery unfold at its own pace. I have no hope that the American version will do the same.

True Detective on HBO at 9:00pm ET. First season finale. This is one of the only shows that I’ve really tried to remain spoiler free on, as I might be getting HBO soon and want to see it “clean” so to speak. So, viewers, give me a window of how long I’m going to have to get someone else to pre-screen Facebook or Twitter for me. A day? Two days? I know I’m SOL when the show is actually airing since people seem physically incapable of not disseminating spoilery stuff the minute it happens on their TV like some strange kind of social media tourettes. The best example I’ve found of this is that people who read the A Song of Ice and Fire series kept the Red Wedding quiet for YEARS and the minute it was on TV everyone knew the next day. So, yeah. Be better than that.

The Walking Dead on AMC at 9:00pm ET.

Lindsay on OWN at 10:00pm ET. Series premiere.

Genevieve Burgess may end up giving up Twitter for Lent after all, you spoiling freaks.







Are you following Pajiba on Facebook or Twitter? Every time you do, Bill Murray crashes a wedding.


Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • Jim

    Ok, there`s the movie "The Returned" - full disclosure I haven't seen. It appears to have similar driving factors to the fantastic UK series "In The Flesh" but the tag line makes me think they made it into an action flick. Boo Hiss. "In the Flesh" had a pacing that stomped forward like a zombie and the last episode was gut-wrenching.

    Tonight you have "Resurrection" which appears will share a lot of plot lines with the French TV series "Les Revenants". I bulk watched "Les Revenants" this Fri past - it's now sunday and I still don't quite know what to make of it.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

  • Stu Rat

    At our Fourth of July BBQ last year:
    My sister: Are you watching Game of Thrones?
    Me: I don't have HBO.
    Her: I DVR'd it-only one episode left. Maybe two.
    Me: Well i did see everyone losing their minds on the internet.
    Her: Losing their minds, why?
    Me: Well, because...have you gotten to the wedding episode yet.
    Her: Oh. Yeah.
    Me: Well everyone freaked out about all the characters that were killed.
    Her: What? Nobody died.
    Me: Uh. The Red Wedding? You said you'd seen the wedding episode.
    Her: Yeah. The little guy got married to that one girl.
    Me: Oops...I did not know that.

  • lowercase_ryan

    I will give you an HBO Go pw if it means you don't have to leave the internet <3

  • Genevieve Burgess

    I'll just go download the Unspoiler plugin, because even with your generous offer there's no way I'd make it through the season by tomorrow. Well, not if I want to be functional at work.

  • DominaNefret

    Les Revenants/Resurrection IS based on American source material. Maybe this will give us at least a bit of a leg up.

  • kinoumenthe

    Les Revenants is not based on American source material since the French movie it is based on largely predates both the movie Resurrection and the Novel it is adapted from.
    The only material the director of Les revenants (both the movie and the series) could maybe have based it on is a Japanese movie from 2002 called Yomigaeri.

  • Maydays

    I read the novel, and it started really strong and then just seemed to fizzle which I think is a bad sign for the show. I don't see it OnDemand or repeating outside of tonight's 9pm timeslot, so it's losing in my DVR death match to NdGT and Walking Dead. Shame. If it weren't for the timeslot, I'd try it.

  • e jerry powell

    "I have no hope that the American version will do the same."
    Because you are a smart lady.

  • HelloLongBeach

    The Returned is the most frustrating movie! BUT WHYYYYYYY? I hope they offer an explanation in the series even if it's just aliens.

  • e jerry powell

    I have to re-arrange my viewing tonight because of Neil DeGrasse Tyson. At least everything else I watch on Sundays is on premium cable.

  • BWeaves

    I was a little disappointed that Cosmos was pretty much EXACTLY a copy of Carl Sagan's version. I was hoping for a little more. A little faster paced with more science information and no spaceship. Plus, I missed the Vangelis theme music.

    Also, I noticed how he glossed over how he championed demoting Pluto from being a planet.

  • e jerry powell

    Consider how much of a Sagan fanboy Seth MacFarlane is, and multiply it by how much of a Sagan fanboy Tyson is, and I think the slavish adherence to the original will explain itself.

    As a staunch defender of Pluto's planethood, I take that particular demotion quite personally.

  • **I AM** NotTheOne

    I believe it is supposed to be on NatGeo on Mondays and Fox on Sundays going forward. I just watched on NatGeo...

    Damnit Neil deGrasse Tyson, science is not supposed to make you feel the feelings! Nobody told you to tell touching stories about Carl Sagan!!!

    *runs away sobbing*

  • e jerry powell

    Of course, NatGeo will be re-airing on more than just Mondays (with extra footage). Sundays actually aren't bad, as it turns out, but the extra footage makes me geek out, and Mondays are just not good anymore. Too much with all the drag queens and The Spader.

    Yeah, he told the Carl Sagan story. He left out the part that he never did go to Cornell; he opted to go to Harvard for his undergrad. UT is still trying to claim him, even though they kicked him out of his doctoral program (research apparently wasn't his strong suit at the time, and at UT, that's deadly).

  • idiosynchronic

    I know FOX is airing this on just about every channel they own, but Sunday @ 9PM - and this Sunday in particular - is like a 5-way gojira tournament to the death. I'm dreading to see how much Cosmos gets its ass kicked - I need it to keep broadcasting over-the-air. :-)

  • e jerry powell

    It's anybody's guess. The premiere of "Resurrection," a repeat of "The Voice," and a regular episode of "The Good Wife."

    A shitload of reality on basic cable.

    But fear not, FOX is committed because they don't want to piss off EP Seth MacFarlane. Also, it's a limited-run series (13 episodes, just like the original), and it's not as if FOX has better to do on Sunday nights until baseball kicks in.

  • dorquemada

    I commend your decision to remain spoiler free, but I don't think it will be possible unless you get freeze-dried and isolated from society. See: Breaking Bad and the Red Wedding finales. Nowhere is safe.

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