5 Shows After Dark: This is a Thing That is Happening on Your TV Tonight
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! IT TOOK ME TO THE VERY LAST WEEK, BUT I WON! This week, absolutely NO ONE guessed the fake show! None of you! Not a single one! I managed to shuffle something off onto a tertiary network while simultaneously listing what looked like a pretty obvious fake that was actually real and I beat all of you! I WIN PAJIBA, YOU GUYS! There is no such show as “Aftermath”. It does not exist. Took me seven weeks but I finally cracked how to trick you, and it was to create a reasonably thoughtful show on a network no one watches that also didn’t sound interesting enough that you tried to follow up on it. That’s… sort of depressing. But it won’t distract me from my victory lap. I know you didn’t do it on purpose, but I’m going to go ahead and consider this a collective birthday present from all of you. Because it makes me feel special. Here’s what’s for real on TV tonight:
“Kid Rock: Live from Buffalo Chip” on CMT at 8:00pm ET. I’m not a big Kid Rock fan, despite his creation of one of the most perfect jock rock songs of all time in “Bawitdaba”, but he’s won some of my admiration by selling flat $20 concert tickets with no fees and using ticketless services or requiring ID in order to prevent scalpers for taking his fans for a ride as best he can. He’s doing quite well off some of these shows, as I understand it, but it’s nice to see a rock star use their clout to do something genuinely nice for their fans. When he’s not busy abusing classic rock songs, anyway.
“Burn Notice” on USA at 9:00pm ET.
“Ghost Shark” on SyFy at 9:00pm ET. Original telefilm. Every time I see something like “Sharknado” hit it big on the internet it’s super fun, but the downside is that genuinely terrible (instead of hilariously terrible) movies like this happen and you realize it’s kind of like laughing when your dog humps the chair and then having it blow up in your face one night when your boss/mother in law/pastor is over for dinner. There are unpleasant repercussions.
“Hollywood Game Night” on NBC at 10:00pm ET.
“Children’s Hospital” on Adult Swim at 12:00am ET.
Genevieve Burgess turns 27 next week, so join her in being very happy that she herself did not end up a rock star, as that seems to be a bad year for them.