Pajiba

I don't give a fuck about Heigl one way or another, but seriously, is there something wrong with her? First she's dissing Knocked Up, and now Grey's. One of them is the only reason anyone knows her anyway, and the other could have launched her as a movie star, and all she can do is talk shit on both. She must be stuck on stupid.

ANYway. I thought I'd heard that Tricia Helfer was joining Burn Notice this coming season. Maybe I'm imagining things.

I don't watch Grey's and did not get the Heigl hate until I saw her on the Oscars. She was given the great professional privilege of being allowed to go up on stage to introduce...something or someone; I don't remember...and she tried to make it about herself. Tack-ee.

Something about her is just off-key. And I agree that bitching about her bread and butter (Grey's) is both stupid and offensive. But the kicker was when she went on record calling out Knocked Up as misogynist--I disagree, but thought she had a point--and then followed that movie with 27 Dresses, possibly the most condescending woman-hating propaganda movie since Pretty Woman.

Feh. If she had more talent she might be tolerable, but she doesn't.

I propose not only she stays in a coma for the entire season but that she wakes up while someone is having sex in her bed (not with her, grey's anatomy would never get that dark humor) completely mute. and so she's stays for a couple of episode where everyone is just gonna kill her with the narration of their love lives and she's gonna have to listen and listen. after 3 episodes she's gonna be so awfully over it cause clearly nothing is about her anymore and she will attempt suicide, only to fail again and end up in another sweet coma.
I found hilarious how the real life rainbow killer personality and the character she portrays are so spot on identically irritating. I bet they cast her thinking she's was playing annoying full of herself insecure blodie only to find out she's not that good of an actress and she really is that way.

I love your idea for what to do with Heigl in this next season. I would almost want them to make one well placed jab about her in some way every show, but completely ignoring her ass seems like it would be more effective.

Tim Roth in anything, even a procedural, makes me excited. The Romany Malco show sounds kinda lame but hopefully he can make it work.

Oh Godtopus, how does T.R. put up with the bitch? I would say that you're not supposed to bite the hand that feeds you, but at this point, Rainbow Killer has swallowed the whole fucking arm Anaconda-style and seems to be going to town on the head and torso.

Gabs -- Tricia Helfer is going to be in a few episodes of "Burn Notice" in the coming year, but not as a regular cast member. Still, girl is busy.

I'll tell myself I'm watching "Prince of Motor City" for the Hamlet, or the Hauer, or the Quinn. But really I'll be watching for the Perabo. Damn that impossibly gorgeous woman.

Eh. You know, quite frankly, I'm having a hard time caring anymore. Every time something interesting comes along, it gets cancelled. Every time someone fun to watch appears, they just as quickly disappear. I liked Conrad, but haven't watched Weeds in awhile. The procedurals..well, I'm just glad you started the moratorium, Seth.

I just want to concentrate on my two favorite shows, Terminator and House, and leave the rest alone. Ever since the writer's strike, which broke TV's addictive hold on me, I've been distancing myself more and more.

But Rainbow Killer can go fuck a lemon sideways...bitch can't keep her stupid mouth shut.

Ever since the writer's strike, which broke TV's addictive hold on me, I've been distancing myself more and more.

Me, too. And apparently we're not alone: this story started making the rounds Monday. Unbelievable, no?

I was under the impression that Conrad and Heylia were just demoted to recurring -- you're saying they aren't in this season at all? Honestly though, as long as this season continues to be as good as these past three eps have been, I'll be okay with them disappearing.

Tricia Helfer has my attention for any show she's in - but when is someone going to give Katee Sackhoff the starring role she deserves? I'm so glad she didn't get the CSI gig, because I have no interest in that crapfest.

Speaking of crapfests, I can't imagine why anyone watches Grey's Anatomy. And Heigel looks freaky to me - like an adult Barbie variant - so I'm lost on all the attention she gets. She does seem to spew stupid comments, so maybe that's it.

I'm really looking forward to True Blood, but that video was boring and bad.

I second everything that Shadows said. I watch House and Lost. (Not counting Torchwood and Doctor Who.) I'm just kind of over the whole TV thing. Anything good gets yanked, and the stuff that everyone else says is good (example: Pushing Daisies) makes me want to jab myself in the eye with a barbecue skewer.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is, meh.

IMO, Rutger Hauer peeked with Blind Fury.

Rutger Hauer IS good. It's the pictures that got bad!

I am with you on Damages. It was a pretty good show, made better by the acting. It has the potential to get better in season 2 so I imagine I'll be watching.

Are the banner ads on this page just dicking with me? Buffy ads usually mean Joss Whedon news, but there isn't any.

Not to be ignorant, but why is Heigl the "Rainbow Killer"? I missed this... is it because her personality could suck all the color out of a rainbow?
Jerce, love your observation: "But the kicker was when she went on record calling out Knocked Up as misogynist [...] and then followed that movie with 27 Dresses, possibly the most condescending woman-hating propaganda movie since Pretty Woman." Awesome.

Not all TV is lost. You just have to move away from traditional network broadcast. Get a hi def television, get digital cable, and record every episode of "Deadliest Catch" on the Discovery Channel. It will make you so happy. I promise. I applied for a company escape to join a crew for a season! I don't think I'll get it, but if I did, and if I made the cut for one of those crews, HOLY ADVENTURE! It's a pipe dream but TV gave it to me.

Also, Jeremy. You never came over this weekend! Jerk... I cleaned and everything.

I think the reason that most of the women on Pajiba don't like Heigl is because she's hot. And most unhot ladies don't like hot ladies.

Well, Pookie, then how come most of the men on Pajiba don't like the Rainbow Killer either?

You know, while I was abroad I sat down and watched "Grey's Anatomy" through *ahem* semi-legal means. Anyway, there's a HUGE gap between how Katherine Heigl's character was written in season 1 and most of season 2 and how she was written anytime after that. Maybe she did something to bring it on herself, but if I went from an interesting, reasonably sympathetic character to a shrill, self-obsessed harpy in the span of one summer hiatus I'd be pissed too.

But that's just my opinion. If ya'll want to keep piling hate on the woman, I can't disagree that she says some dumb things that she maybe should've thought through a little better.

Anastasia Beaverhausen...there used to be another name for her, since Dustin hated her with the passion of a thousand suns...but since the Great Debacle of the 27 Dresses review...her name's been changed to reflect the hate but not the hypocrisy of a misogynistic nickname.

In other words...shit got way too real...a lot of feelings were hurt...some limbs were lost...and a puppy died of malnutrition.

I thought she was kind of charming in Knocked Up. But, then I realized that she was really hot and decided to hate her. I HATE hot women. My favorite actress is Tyler Perry.

I knew that Old Yeller brand dog food was nothing but trouble!

In other words...shit got way too real...a lot of feelings were hurt...some limbs were lost...and a puppy died of malnutrition.

HEE! I love you. That is such an apt summary.

I heart you megbon.

So Pookie, most Pajiba women are 'unhot'?
Would you like to back that implication up with empirical evidence?

I can say for proof positive that Julie and Nicole are both mega-hot...so that theory doesn't hold up.

And smart womens are teh hawt...didn't you all know that?

Sure I can prove it StephanieS, the unhot ones know they are not hot and the hot ones know that they are hot. Ergo, when you're hot you're hot, you really shoot your shot because you're dynomite, child, yeah.

Trust me when I tell you that stuck in Seth's craw is the last place you want to be.

The Girls of Pajiba calendar officially put all those ugly rumors about vag-fros and indelicate piercings to rest. Girls, you're hot. Especially you, SoD.

CatAg: Check your e-mail and give ol' Ted a shout before tomorrow if you can.

Shrill=unhot
Heigl=hot
No?

while i agree that Heigl smacked of hypocrisy with her Knocked Up one-two followed closely by 27 Dresses, I think the hatred piling upon her for her Emmy nomination withdrawal is a bit much...
Surely, she can't simultaneously be uninspiring (to say the least) in Grey's and deserved of an award?
Everyone knows the Emmys, Oscars et al too often reward undeserved nominees, maybe she honestly believes there are others who warrant it more than her, maybe (just maybe) she's not as bad a person as the tabloids will have you believe...

"vag-fros"? I've never heard that term. This is honestly just the most educational website!

Seth - Listen with your eyes and sing everything you see!

Heigl is definitely not hot.

To me, she looks like she ran the 50yd dash in a 40yd gym.

I hate you socalled

Sorry, David honey, I have no idea where you live. I searched every closet sized apartment in New York, but I couldn't find your place. I promise to make it up to you by riding you like a mechanical bull. But only if you wear a condom. Ben is full of shit, we SOOOOOO wear protection.

Oh, no. The tired "jus' jellus" defense. It's possible to legitimately dislike an attractive actress such that your dislike is not merely the product of your blinding rage and resentment of her beauty. I, for example, think Heigl's a pill. There are several lovely actresses, singers, models, etc. who I think are great and seem fun to hang out with (Kate Beckinsale, for example, and even crazy-ass Tyra Banks).

Dudes, of course, never get jealous. You just hate Justin Timberlake because the ladies love him!

To me, she looks like she ran the 50yd dash in a 40yd gym.

Haw haw haw ...

I've so fully internalized 'Rainbow Killer' that I don't even remember Dustin's old, allegedly offensive nickname for her. I thought my brain was supposed to remember things like that over all other information, like with tv theme songs.

I had a feeling that Amy Ryan would be back for more Office episodes. That season finale kicked ass, and they definitely couldn't leave it at that. Besides, there has to be more mileage in the Kevin-as-retarded bit.

Tijuana "T.J" Jackson makes me think of the Simpsons "spin-off" Chief Wiggam, P.I. for some reason.

And Seth, word on your tagline.

Pookie-pookie-pooks. I am hot to trot. Unless peg legs, cracklips, lice, and butt sweat went out of style. And don't forget the missing teeth...mmmmm...the better to gum you with.

Unless peg legs, cracklips, lice, and butt sweat went out of style. And don't forget the missing teeth...mmmmm...the better to gum you with.

Now that's hot...

JM, you're hot. I hate you.

To me, she looks like she ran the 50yd dash in a 40yd gym.

Or fell out the ugly tree & hit every branch ont eh way down. What? That's totally original.

Typos make my day.

The casting announcement for Damages just made my motherfucking day!

Listen I've been in the Lady getting business for a long time and I'm telling you that Heigl is hot. Maybe it was in bad form to suggest that the ladies of pajiba aren't hot. Now if you ladies of pajiba think that you're hot , send me some pictures of yourselves and I'll be glad to show you what to work on to enhance your chances of meeting a high quality man. Serious enquires only.

B-Unit Southfield Correction Center
c/o Llewellyn "Pookie" Jones #78560-306
1824 Jasper way
Jacksonville, Florida 65980

Thanks, SoD. I looked at that review..... that's alotta comments. I don't know if I can do it, or if I want to (I like puppies. And rainbows. I don't want to watch them die). But at least I know where it came from, and learned some fun new uses of the "m"-word.

And for the record, I am neither hot nor un-hot (pretty plain, but not unattractive), and I don't think Heigl is hot. I believe she reminds me too much of the flat faced and emaciated alien Kate Bosworth. I never really liked blondes, in the face... but I don't dislike her because I don't find her physically attractive.

My colleague and I were just having a very serious discussion about which is more aesthetically pleasing: a glass eye or an eyepatch. His friend's girlfriend has a glass eye. I said, "she should just ditch that and get a really hot eyepatch like Daryl Hannah in Kill Bill," to which he responded, "No, that would be worse," and I, of course, strongly disagree. Thoughts? I think you can 'own' an eyepatch easier than a glass eye...

And Jeremy, I don't live in a closet. I have a quite excellent spread, which you'd know if you tried a little harder... and I'd give you my address, but I fear the other folks on this message board :). Maybe we could take it off-board... wink wink.

neither hot nor un-hot (pretty plain, but not unattractive)

With a name like Anastasia Beaverhausen, who the hell is even thinking about looks? I just want to read some hot German poetry-porn. (pornetry?)

My 19 year old brother's opinion is that Katherine Heigl is, indeed, hot, but would be more hot if she had brown hair. Like Kim Kardashian, his #1 celebrity crush. And frankly, after suffering through 2 seasons and change of "Grey's Anatomy", when you put her next to the utterly uninteresting Ellen Pompeo, she looks goddamned stunning.

Not buying it, Pookie. They don't let people in the big house the amount of access to a computer that you clearly have. The 8x10" glossy of me in naught but lacy underthings will NOT be sent.

On an unrelated note, the new Coke Zero commercials with the talking eyeball and tongues remind me strongly of Hieronymous Bosch, and it's freaking me right out.

socalled - you schwein!

And eyepatches are infinitely hotter than glass eyes. They're so mysterious. Glass eyes are not mysterious. No.

a very serious discussion about which is more aesthetically pleasing: a glass eye or an eyepatch

So this conversation doesn't happen only in my head? I think that if the person is well adjusted and otherwise satisfied with her overall appearance, and just wants to continue along as if the who eye thing never happened, then a quality glass eye makes sense. If you're Kate Beckinsale or Sandra Bullock, you probably don't want an eyepatch.

If the person has an interesting, unusual or non-traditional appearance, whether considered traditionally "hot" or not, e.g., Angelina Jolie versus Lisa Loeb, then the eyepatch makes total sense. Women who would look awesome with an eyepatch, regardless of one-eyed status:

Anna Faris
Lucy Liu
Gina Torres
Summer Glau
Rosario Dawson

With a name like Anastasia Beaverhausen, who the hell is even thinking about looks?

Makes me think of bratwurst.

socalled - you schwein!

Yes, pork me baby. Lutsch' meine Eier, Schwanzlutscher!

Jeremy, David, you could just get a room
someplace. Equipped with a webcam, of course.

I'll be in my bunk, awaiting the URL.

Yes sir, Gina Torres would rock the shit out of an eyepatch and beat your ass while doing it.

Missh it's one thing for Heigl to say that she doesn't deserve the award based on her own performance, but she's throwing the writers under the bus with her statement. She could have just refused the nomination and let it be at that. But she had to keep running her mouth and I can't blame them (the writers) for being pissed. Heigl might be misunderstood sometimes, (I actually agreed w/her on some of the Knocked Up stuff) but I don't think that this is one of them.

Seth, this is completely un-related but did you see the premier of that "Secret Life of an American Teen" show? Molly Ringwald played the mother. I saw about 15 minutes of it, and it actually wasn't that bad.

Kolby: Eye-patches are actually kinda cool, as long as their isn't a gaping hole underneath. Glass eyes sound cool, until someone hits a really high note and it shatters in your head. That's never fun.

Drake: We'll let you know. Or we could always have a threesome...David, you're call on this one...

....and where might I locate some of this "pornetry" of which you speak? It sounds delightfully low-brow!

Also, Lucy Liu would look hot beyond words with an eyepatch. But, while Kate Beckinsale is lovely and would probably continue to be with a glass eye, I tend to think she too would look uber hot with a patch. Hm.

The 8x10" glossy of me in naught but lacy underthings

Genny (also Rusty)...I wholeheartedly support your decision. You should have your naughty bits appreciated by someone who worships women. I'll forward you my address. Can't post it here, Julie and/or Nicole might get a hold of it and wreck all kinds of havoc...

I've also been sympathetic to what seem to be Heigl's issues with her character's progression. Although what they did was turn her from a likable person to a shrew in several major plotlines, not ignore her character, so she loses points for basically bitching that Izzy isn't cool anymore. She seems to have a permanent case of foot-in-mouth syndrome and even the less-annoying stuff she says still pisses people off because of general bad feelings toward her. So can we just have a moratorium on her, too?

Women who would look awesome with an eyepatch, regardless of one-eyed status:...

*reads lists*

*pictures women with eyepatches*

*muffled explosion*

Dammit. Thanks a lot, socalled. There goes my favorite jeans.

Lutsch' meine Eier, Schwanzlutscher!

Du bist der Senf auf meinem wiessewurst.

muffled explosion

That phrase got my first genuine LOL of the day.

Well, the "Roswell" era was definitely the peak of her attractiveness, and there was also a short brown hair period in there too which looked fantastic, but I still think she's pretty. Never saw the show but I've always liked the stills and promo photos.

She also does herself, publicist and husband NO favors whatsoever. I'd say quite the opposite! But Jim Carrey already did that in a movie I never saw, so it's also unoriginal.

Random fact: we have the same birthday.

Oh and you DO know I wasn't making up the Old Yeller dog food, right?

Du bist der Senf auf meinem wiessewurst.

That's an unusually sweet response to my invitation, Kolbs. Also, you have a weissewurst? How's that squaring up with carrying a child?

I don't watch Grey's, but a moratorium on Heigl might be an idea.

As I'm aware of my own irrational hatreds I'm hesitant of commenting sometimes. Picture this...I sit down to watch 'Girl with a Pearl Earring'. I'm really looking forward to it, as I was an art student in Britain back when the Earth was young.

I spend the next hour or so screaming at the screen "Please please just close your effing mouth, it doesn't look sexy, it looks like you've got sinus problems!"

I finally just turned it off in disgust. I like to think I've moved beyond my SJ problem.

Thanks for letting me share, and yeah, eye patches are sexy.

You are all insane and I love you for it.

"Like Kim Kardashian, his #1 celebrity crush."

The only thing off-kilter with that sentence, GaR, is the word "celebrity". Unless of course releasing a sex vid and getting your picture taken equals celebr... What? It does? Oops. My bad...

Speaking of glass eyes, Minimus had one for a bit, but everytime I'd cough or sneeze, the goddamed thing'd pop out. Know what I did? Bottle opener, bitches. You got a Red Stripe but no opener? Let me introduce you to Cyber-Minumus! It's A W E S O M E! I'm also thinking about making one that's essentially a battery-powered cigarette lighter (ala the ones that don't come with cars anymore), so I'm guaranteed to never be without a light...

StephanieS I too believe eye patches are sexy. I have often asked my girlfriends to wear them during our love making sessions. One never knows what can get into one's unprotected eyes.

Pookie, that's a good idea. A diving mask might work too, the snorkel is optional.

Ok, I just went out and got an eyepatch from Duane Reade. Simple black and nothing fancy, but it gets the job done. I'm going to rock it for a few days out and about and see what sort of responses I get. I'll report back once I can come up with a consensus on the aesthetics.

Jeremy, I thought we had something special. Now you're just inviting everyone to join? This is troubling. I need to ponder.

StephanieS I'm impressed by the fact that I don't repulse you.

David...I take back everything I said about you. That is an awesome idea. I may have to purloin it for round here.

socalled - I meant weissewurst as in a mild, uncured, unsmoked veal sausage - kind of like a White Hot from Rochester, NY. Perv!

Well, Kolb, just remember the old German proverb: "An unsmoked sausage is an unhappy sausage." Strangely, there's a potentially related old Latvian proverb that may apply as well: "An uncured sausage is a stinging sausage, provided it's been with the Blohan."

Giving rise, of course, to the Latvian futbol team's fan-chant, "Cure that sausage! Cure that sausage!"

Kidding, kidding...Sorry Drake, I'm a one man guy. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to david's opulent New York manor, where I will dine on foie gras and have hot, gay scrabble sex. There has to be scrabble.

All this talk of hawtness makes me want to eat a steak...

I'm bringing my Deluxe Scrabble to the beach next week. WHOOT.

Julie - what beach? I have been dying to just lay on the beach and swim for hours on end since the weather warmed up. I am so jealous!

Sea Isle City, NJ :) I'm going this Saturday through next with 8 friends, we have this great house with 5 bedrooms and a deck. Miss Nicole will be joining me for a night, I am beyond excited. Our alcohol run on Saturday will be legendary.

Yes, Julie...what beach?

{takes out pen and pper}

mmmm....bikinis...

"Well, the "Roswell" era was definitely the peak of her attractiveness, and there was also a short brown hair period in there too which looked fantastic, but I still think she's pretty.
Never saw the show but I've always liked the stills and promo photos."
never saw the show? yeah....right!

eye-patch are so damn hot, and only daniel day lewis can rock a glass eye! and he's freaking daniel day lewis, plus the all eye in the glass at night freaks me out, so always and forever eye-patch, I mean you cant possibly match a new eye glass for every outfit you have, while eye-patch have endless solution.

Yes, Julie...what beach?

Do not forget the telephoto lens this time, Shadows. We do not want to see blurry dots because you can't work a damn zoom.

And use BOTH HANDS!

And use BOTH HANDS!

I thought you boys typically used just one.

David, a word of caution about eyepatches; I wore one for a halloween costume once (Molotov Cocktease, for those who enjoy the Ventureverse) and it will play hell with your depth perception. So watch out for that, maybe don't try driving with it on.

Of course Shadows had to go and call my bluff. Damnit. Do I even have lacy underthings? *thinking*... yes. Good.

My big lens requires two hands.

BAM!

Vermillion, I bought a special tripod this time, so I don't even need to use my hands at all!

That came out a lot wronger than it sounded in my head...

I don't hate Heigl, I don't love her, I meh her. She's hot (I'm pretty sure I'm not), her show kinda sucks, the movies I've seen her in (Bride of Chuckie and Knocked Up) were OK. She does need to be more circumspect about her opinions. She works in a business where you never know when your current job will go away or where the next will come from. Ragging on the writers and producers who provide your jobs is not wise. I mean, there's a difference between having an opinion and spreading it far and wide and alienating coworkers with it.

But I'd like to give props to Shaun Cassidy. I'll check out his latest. I think he deserves the benefit of the doubt. He seems like he really tries to create entertaining entertainment, as opposed to the producers who just try to find new ways to show attention whores debasing themselves. I liked "American Gothic" and "Invasion."

Molotov Cocktease, for those who enjoy the Ventureverse

Now I want a picture of that. Hell yes I want a picture of that.

never saw the show? yeah....right!

The hell you think the internet's for? It's for looking at actors whose work you don't have any interest in, going back to Alyson Hannigan in a copy of Interview about ten years ago. "Who's that? Where's she from?.....Oh.....Well, maybe there's some more pictures on a web site since I don't want to watch the show". Never has it been easier to get shallow pulchritude satisfaction with so little time and effort, and it gets easier all the time.

Molotov Cocktease, for those who enjoy the Ventureverse

I concur with the need for pictures of this. I be talking from English language again soon, promise.

Um, you didn't happen to have anyone dressed up as Dr. Girlfriend Fiance Wife, did you?

Side note: anyone else LOVING the origin stories on this season of Venture Bros.? So many questions getting answered, and they are just piling on the funny.

If I had a missing eye, I would hide things behind my eyepatch, like change, piano wire, military secrets, or a nail clipper when air traveling. If airport security gives me shit, I could just say that there's still shrapnel embedded in there from the war. That or I'll just wear a condom over my eye that matches my oversized t-shirt and neon parachute pants like Left Eye.

If I had a missing eye, I would hide things behind my eyepatch, like..[all the words that follow]

You? Are awesome. Please run for President.

Jeremy, David. Have fun, play safe, and take
a short moment to have a kind thought for me.
(Oh, and take pictures).

Side note: anyone else LOVING the origin stories on this season of Venture Bros.? So many questions getting answered, and they are just piling on the funny.

Yes, this season is great. I'm amazed at how they
have managed to maintain the quality and humor.

You? Are awesome. Please run for President.

Seconded.

Anyone interested, the photo of me as Molotov Cocktease is now on my blog, second one down. Link's in my name. Since I didn't have a really good picture from that year, I threw in Halloween 2005 (Elastigirl) and Halloween 2007 (Blossom from the Powerpuff girls) too.

And Season 3 of VB is totally awesome. I can't wait to find out more about all of them. And I'm seriously considering doing Dr. Mrs. The Monarch for Halloween this year, except I couldn't do the voice.

I'm bringing an extra memory card just for this shore excursion. Godtopus only knows what trouble we're going to find.

And I've horrified Servo by proclaiming that I don't believe in playing cards.

Bring on the Scrabble!

G(aR), u r teh hawt.

Helen Parr makes me feel funny in my pantal region. If Helen could have Violet's voice, that would be my perfect woman.

I say that if Rainbow Killer wants some better writing or a meatier role, let her have it. The writers should let her live down to her old Pajiba namesake and give her a case of colon cancer.

Don't boo me. Hear me out. I didn't say she should die from it. Let her get diagnosed in the first episode of the new season and let her spend the rest of the season dealing with it. Flipping out thinking that she's going to die. Let the audience see what aggressive chemo can really do to a person (none of this Love Story sickness crap where a person becomes better looking the more sick they get). Put her in some really nasty hair-falling out makeup for an episode or two, then shave her head & eyebrows (and go sans makeup) and let the writers tell her they're doing it "so that she can pull a Charlize Theron."

And through it all will be her *new* man (I'm guessing fellow doctor (or even her oncologist)). A guy willing to give it her all and stand by her no matter what kind of freakish, troll-like latex prostetics the makeup people are giggling over that week. He becomes a rock in her storm, and she learns to ditch the shrewish characterization that became the 2nd season and start acting like a human being again.

Eventually, near the end of the season, she has to have surgery to remove the tumor. The surgeon decides that the only way to remove the tumor would be to go in through the anus.

In the final episode of the season, Rainbow Killer gets the operation and the last few minutes show her recovering. All soft focus and white light, with the camera focusing squarely on her while she's slowly waking up. In walks the new man, and they have some soft small talk. It's obvious to the audience that he's beating around the bush, but Rainbow Killer doesn't see it. He eventually comes to the point and basically says that he's breaking up with her because after the operation, the sex won't be the same.

A beat while the audience asks themselves, "Did he just say they had a lot of anal?"

The camera pulls up into the ceiling while he walks away and she lies in bed crying.

Am I suggesting the writers spend an entire season humiliating Rainbow Killer just to imply in the last minute that she's a nasty skank who likes teh buttseks and the occasional Dirty Sanchez?

Why yes, yes I am.

Helen Parr makes me feel funny in my pantal region.

Don't it make ya sad when she looks in the mirror and seems disappointed with her figure?

You know what Robert Forster would say: ain't nothin wrong with that.

Genny, that is awesome. The Pajiboys are single handily keeping the pants industry alive.

Jerce, Shadows, only if you guys are on my cabinet. That'd be one drunken executive branch.

Yeah, that's a weird moment, because they make her waist so tiny, the only reason her rear or legs would look odd is because they're so disproportionate to the Barbie waist. Ridonkulous. I heart Elastigirl. I'm assuming the elastic control is an all-over-body thing, so ... you know what I'm saying. (Hint: I'm saying she can elasticize her vagina. Hubba hubba! But don't anger her while you're in there.)

The Pajiboys are single handily keeping the pants industry alive.

Just because you said "pants":
http://youtube.com/watch?v=iVG0MkW05Mo
http://youtube.com/watch?v=q69tyPdLp5U

Rusty, I hope your greasepaint domino mask stayed indoors. I'll never forget the trauma from those years of "Oh god I need to mop the sweat but I can't touch my face!!"

Sure, "Hot October Night" doesn't make as catchy an album title, but lemme tell you, south Florida Halloween is vile.

Jay I went out to Coconut Grove in Miami that night. The mask stayed put. This was probably because I didn't use greasepaint but cheap-ass CVS "lip gloss" that required a solid 5 minutes of scrubbing to get off after I got back. BUT, it made for a great costume.

And since my figure's gone slightly in the direction of Helen Parr since my Elastigirl costume, I'm glad to hear she's a fan favorite.

I've always assumed everyone on this site was hideous except for me and spambot.

It seems the debate is going very pro-eyepatch, but I'd just like to say that I would much rather fuck Sandy Duncan over Darryl Hannah any day.

I don't think that mentioning upcoming cop/lawyer/medical shows can be nearly as annoying as CONSTANTLY mentioning your temporary moratorium on discussing procedural/doctor/lawyer shows.

Gia, if you can't stand to see a single sentence repeated in a column that only runs once a week, meaning you're essentially reading it no more than once every seven days, yet calling it CONSTANTLY...

... well, I don't know how to help you. Maybe a stiff drink? Something to help you LIGHTEN THE FUCK UP?

As a public service announcement, Pajiba just wishes to remind readers that the TV Whore currently has imposed a moratorium on discussing cop/lawyer/doctor television programming. This PSA will automatically repeat every 10.4 seconds on a randomly occurring basis, to ensure sufficient saturation.

Repeating, the TV Whore has imposed a moratorium on discussing cop/lawyer/doctor television programming. Your cooperation is appreciated in advance.

Fuck fuck motherfuck. Not fair. Conrad and Heylia were some of the best part of Weeds. Yes, I threw a fit last week, but I'm just too tired and full of porkchops to get worked up.

Fuckkkk.

Yes, everyone hates Rainbow Killer. Let's hope she gets some kind of chick cancer.

Jaci, I just looked at your blog, and I have to say my sphincter did a little Zellwegger of middle-aged fear. But I'm the kind of man who's comfortable in a room full of Inconvenient Truth visual aides, Playboy bunnies, and competing market Anal Penetrator knockoffs. It takes a lot to unsettle me, and you're working on a fan.

Am I suggesting the writers spend an entire season humiliating Rainbow Killer just to imply in the last minute that she's a nasty skank who likes teh buttseks and the occasional Dirty Sanchez?

Wow. Guess I won't be vying for Top 10 Comments this week.

I took a nap earlier. Now I'll be up all night.

Jaci, your blog is rad. I just have to ask you not to go there with the chick cancer. (No, I'm not a self-important pontificating bitch; two close friends and I lost a mother, a grandmother, and an aunt, respectively, to ovarian cancer and I'm kind of a freak about it. I even have an OVCA tattoo.)

I'm digging the colon cancer idea. My sister spends her days as an endoscopy tech and does colonoscopies for hours. It's actually a hilarious job.

'What the writers should do is put Rainbow Killer's Izzie in a coma' Excellent idea...Katherine Heigl should learn not to bit the hand that feeds her and also that having two hit movies does not make one a star. In other words she has a long way to go before she joins the A List.

BTW I don't hate her, I think she's great; but arrogant and perhaps misguided?

Prince of Motor City...' loosely modern spin on Hamlet set in Detroit'...I think I'll pass...even though Aidan Quinn is always good value for money.

I've seen the first episode of 'True Blood' ( not privileged, its been avaliable via bittorrent for a while now ) and MAN is it boring. Nice idea but its so slow. Won't be watching the next episode...