Pajiba

Um, not to threaten my status as an outlier or anything, but I agree that Britney probably does fart in public. However, that is indicative of the larger problem of Britney Spears, which is that she's crazier than a shit house rat.

It has been so SO long since I've really wanted to see a movie in theaters and not just shrugged my shoulders and said "That'll do, pig". Keep it up, Hollywood, you're only ensuring that Netflix gets my money instead of you.

Re: on those two girls discussing Brit vs Linz. That's just your basic barstool argumentation, I guess. Even me and my friends do that, after reminiscing about Masters of the Universe, we get up in a five-minute debate over who's the bigger skank between Kardashian and Paris. And we're all males approaching thirty.

Leave Britney alone! I'm serious! etc...

Er... savvy. I'll just swill that around for a moment, before commenting something about going to the Louvre to see the Mona Lisa, but settling for a bunch of Superbad cock doodles because that's all that was on display. Or maybe I'm just bitter because I'm too old to find a reason to wear a ball-gown these days.

MySpace is not a tool for good as long as it looks like a cliche of every possible ugly piece of design that should no longer exist anywhere on the internet.

Making embedded midis and hideous layout design even more easily available to the masses? As if those damned animated cursors weren't already easy enough to find. No points.

My roommate and I usually go to the super discount movie every Saturday morning, and this week we were given the choice between Persepolis and Nim's Island. My roommate was hungover and refused to read subtitles, so we saw Nim's Island instead. Oh dear godtopus, it was horrible. Not even Abigail Breslin's cuteness or Gerard Butler's hotness could overcome the shittyness of that movie.

Gerard Butler is in Nim's Island? He's not in the trailers, is he? Is his appearance on the screen a prize for those who allowed themselves to be dragged (hopefully kicking & screaming) to see the film?

A word of warning to anyone planning on viewing Leatherheads: my brother-in-law went this weekend with his mother, and the old-timey music in the film was just so darn catchy she felt it necessary to hum along to it the entire time. She may have even danced in her seat. So, consider yourself warned if you have a mother who's prone to idiocy in dark places - don't see that movie with her.

Hmmm, I haven't read the Prom Night comments yet, I guessed how they would go and decided to save them for my mid afternoon slump. However I will say the following: Hurrah for being an outlier!

I spent my Sunday evening playing Trivial Persuit (I won, natch) over a gourmet home cooked meal and a couple of bottles of red wine. I also managed to hold simultaneous conversations on contemporary Spanish sculpture (my flatmate's little sister was staying with us, she's an artist) and the toxicity of burnt meat (it's the Tryptophan that's the problem).

In the middle of all of this I suddenly remembered exactly why I had no friends in high school.

I'm just patiently waiting for "Iron Man" because there has not been a single film since "Cloverfield" that I actually felt compelled to buy a ticket for. So keep it up Hollywood, you are doing a bang up job this year!

Iron Man.

*whine*

*checks calandar*

*whines again*

I hear you, Twig. Believe me.

I'm actually happy about the Iron Man release date. Why? Because I don't have to spend three months reading reviews and getting myself over excited before eventually never getting around to seeing it.

Iron Man. The Dark Knight. Hellboy 2.

Big budgeted geektastic bliss.

I've said it before, and I will say it again: The only reason junk like Prom Night rises to the top is because the only set of viewers with the disposable income to blow $9-10 on a poopy movie is the youngins. And they seem to not be so choosy with the quality of their cinematic options, just somewhere to go in the dark, scream, and grope each other.

Us Ahh-Dults have to horde our pennies wisely so we can do shit like buy food and pay the rent/mortgage. We'll wait for dreck like Prom Night to come on Starz, so we can consume booze, munch microwave popcorn, laugh hysterically, and shout out directives to the actors on screen from within the privacy of our own homes.

One of the first things I'm doing when they let me out of the Big House is going on a date with Mr. Pink to see Iron Man. I am not shamed to admit that one of my drivers behind kicking some Stupid Leukemic Cell Ass is so I won't miss certain anticipated flicks this summer. That and Little Pink and my family, and all that other shit.

Dammit, I do not want being sick preventing me from seeing The Dark Knight. That will make me superfuckingpissed.

but I agree that Britney probably does fart in public. However, that is indicative of the larger problem of Britney Spears, which is that she's crazier than a shit house rat.

Genny wait, wait, wait. Farting in public makes you crazy? Or farting in public is a warning sign of crazy-tisity? Because if that's the case... Than I know a lot more people who should be locked up, clutching frappuchinos and sucking on strands of pink wig hair. And supervised more heavily by their fathers. And then stunt-casted in a cute show.

I mean, yea, it's "inappropriate," but signs of crazy?

And in any conversation/contest/picture/thought of "Linds" and "Brit-Brit," does anyone really win?

Necrokrasinkiphilia (an irresistible sexual attraction to John Krasinski's corpse) and the fervor is growing -- John Krasinski can no longer leave his apartment without a team of immune bodyguards, whose job it is to protect him from menstruating women (because that's when the urge is strongest) who want to take his rigor-virginity away from him. It's a bit like Beatlemania, only bloodthirstier.

That kind of made me throw up in my mouth a little. But in a good, giggly way.

Iron Man. The Dark Knight. Hellboy 2.

Keep it down! Don't remind me! I'm trying to surprise myself this summer with delicious movie treats. Shhhh!!!

Two Things -

1) "25- to 42-year-old readers" That's a fairly large generational grouping. You've just lumped together everyone born between 1966 and 1982. Don't get me wrong, as a 1981 person, I have no wish to be lumped together with the younger crowd. However, I do feel that it might be a stretch to refer to myself and someone born during the Johnson administration as the same generation.

2) A film has Christina Ricci and you're making fun of someone else's forehead?

I never really knew what generational tag was applied to me. Everyone refered to those 2 years older as the slackers and the class after mine, 2000, as the saviors of world. Good old 1999 just got a Prince song.

Keep in mind that the class of 2000 at my high were generally high and most have either the first divorce or first trip to prison and you can see why I hated high school.

Do not lump Perez Hilton in with anyone near my age. Put him in the category that references his mental age, which has to be a negative number.

Dammit, I do not want being sick preventing me from seeing The Dark Knight. That will make me superfuckingpissed.

That would just be evil. Then you'd have to create some Ferris Bueller type escape.

It would be totally do-able.

True, Alex. We (UK geeks) had to wait six months for the first Hellboy after it was released in the States. This time they've managed to whittle the gap down to a piffling six weeks. Awwwwww, crap.

Oh well, at least we get Iron Man on the same day and only have to wait an extra week for The Dark Knight. I'd ideally like to see them all spoiler-free, and in the age of the interweb it's nigh-on impossible to avoid 'em.

Yeah, Alex the Odd, tryptophan not so much a problem in burnt meat. In fact, it's not really a problem at all - doensn't cause sleepiness and isn't any kind of poison. In fact we get tons of tryptophan from other sources - we need it to make serotonin. The only possible problem in burnt meat is making a few polycyclic aromatics and even then, unless you're cooking with jet fuel, only a few are made. We're talking 0.001 ppt which is far less than you get from being in Detroit for twenty minutes or owning a car.

"25- to 42-year-old readers" That's a fairly large generational grouping. You've just lumped together everyone born between 1966 and 1982.

Blame old media's reaction to Coupland's novel. Coupland described some desillusioned twentysomethings in the eighties (thus born in the sixties), but the papers and magazines decided that Gen-X had to be extended to everyone with pubic hair in 1993.

Or something like that. It's a all bit of a blur now

Kayanne, what I mean isn't that farting in public is necessarily crazy, but that once you are crazy you probably don't give a fuck about farting in public. I mean, if you can't remember to wear panties on a regular basis, you're not going to be losing sleep over cutting the cheese in the line for the ATM, you know?

Pink, I do hope you get out in time for the summer blockbusters. It's just not the same seeing them at home, no matter how big a TV screen you have.

If Pink's not out in time, I say we rally the troops and go get Robert Downey Jr, Jeff Bridges, and Terrence Howard and bring Iron Man to HER!

We'll call it MurderTank Makes a House Call.

Shadows: I'm sorry. I'll be quiet. It's just... so.... much.... pretty goodness! Squee!

Zuffle: Oh I hear you on that six week wait time. But at least we got Hot Fuzz and Severance first so there's always that. Not really that much of a consolation but there we go. Also: Hurrah for another geeky Brit! We're a little outnumbered round these parts.

A biochemist who doesn't flaunt his ignorance: Thanks for the correction, honey bee. As a biochemist who willingly does flaunt her ignorance (my specialties are genetics, neuroscience and development in case you're interested but yes, I will give my opinion on almost anything regardless of my actual levels of knowledge) I will confess that I was merely repeating the pontifications of my flatmate, also a biochemist albeit one who doesn't do much flaunting either way. Perhaps I should have fact checked my thirty second post designed to act as a play on the kind of hipster/intellectual defensiveness of the 15-24 demographic I was sure went on in the Prom Night thread before submitting it.

Next time I shall know better.

"25 to 42 year old readers"

Thanks a fucking heap Dustin! You arbitrarily choose 42 as the cut-off for the proto-typical cool mature Pajiban? If I had the strength in my osteoporotic bones, I'd thump you, but you know everything falls apart at 43. I'd sneer in your direction but the botox makes that very difficult and I'd pee on your lawn but I'd have to take my Depends off first. Oh how I wish it was April 1st and I could hurl invective at you for a couple of hours.

But at least we got Hot Fuzz and Severance first so there's always that.

Spaced. Still waiting. Patiently. Stilllll waiting.

Plus the 'international' versions of video games you get sometimes have extra swag tacked on the end. I think it's only Australia that gets completely screwed when it comes to gaming.

You guys haven't had Spaced yet? Damn. Maybe they're holding it back so when the McG US retread comes along they won't have to suffer the inevitable comparisons. Sorry if that last sentence causes anyone undue suicidyism.

MySpace is not a tool for good as long as it looks like a cliche of every possible ugly piece of design that should no longer exist anywhere on the internet.

I'm choking down my cackling.

I hadn't thought of that but that's exactly it. Strong Bad once had a good grumble about making your own web design, "Yer Flash intro and animated....jiffs?....giffs?...." Funnier in his voice of course.

And yet, I do like the unicorn flying across the black sparkly background of a Myspace page like a Wolfshirt COME ALIVE more than, say, a photo gallery or something all Flashed out so I can't fucking save any pictures or videos. DAMN YOU, FLASH!!! FUCKIN UP MY RIGHT CLICK!!!!

I'm glad Myspace at least gave you the option to NOT play people's little music player by default. The imbedded midis of today.

Sometimes I do get a little nostalgic for midi-ed salutes to people's cats. The most joyfully krazy shit I've seen this side of the grown up Peter Pan.

just somewhere to go in the dark, scream, and grope each other.

Yup, that's pretty much our 40+ Friday night, but we do it in the basement on the washer. Can't wait for Ironman.

twig: See, now I started a massive rant about how incredibly unfair that was and listed all the games I could never play and how much I've paid for my various systems then I re-read your post, realised I'd misread "Australia" as "America" and deleted the entire thing with a sympathetic sigh.

Seriously. You guys are the only people who have it worse than we do.

Zuffle, scheduled for July. Apparantly the problem lay in the song liscensing, or something. And they mentioned the whole U.S. 'Spaced' thing a little while ago, so it's not so much suicide as some leaking from the stitches and a little extra rectal tearing.

DAMN YOU, FLASH!!! FUCKIN UP MY RIGHT CLICK!!!!

Oh, overFlash is a symptom of the same design problems as the rest of it. I swear it all started when Photoshop decided the lens flare was the best tool they could put in the hands of the innocent.

AtO, oh I'm in the U.S. but Yahtzee, who does the best video game reviews on the web (I think of him as a videogame Pajiba) is from there, and the time lag for certain games is just god awful.

Plus, I think they banned 'Rule of Rose' outright and that's just laughably stupid.

Yeah, Austalia does get the short end on the gaming front. I bet even they won't have to pay US$360 for Rock Band, though.

Psha! And you had me feeling all sorry for you for a second there. My sympathy is a rare thing.

Don't mention Rule of the Rose it's still a sore spot. I hate the fucking media. Have I mentioned recently how I'm moving Stateside for at least a year purely to get tattoos, watch TV and catch up on video games? Cause I am.

Hmmm if I time it right maybe I can couch hop for the majority of the trip. Now there's an idea.

Well, I say be rude or be ignorant if you have to, just don't be both. Then you really suck.

Just checked to make sure those Region 1 dvd's of Spaced are still coming in July (though you've all already made productive use of your computers and watched them anyway, yes?) and I saw this:

"The Guardian have reported that Simon and Edgar's third film collaboration, part three of their so called "Cornetto Trilogy", has the working title The World's End.

No firm news yet on what the genre of the film will be, but when asked if the title suggested a sci-fi/doomsday theme, Edgar commented "It's kind of going in that direction."

OOH OOH OOH OOH!!!!

(http://www.spaced-out.org.uk/)

I'd never heard of "Severance" but I saw that the writer of this week's Doctor Who (again, I loved it) wrote it. So a Wright/Pegg person can get behind this movie, you say? Always good to hear.

I'm so sorry, twig...that really does suck. But at least you have...umm...well, there's...errr...there's always...[blank stare]...

I'm so sorry, twig...that really does suck. At least you're not...ummm...Switzerland?

I hate flash. I hate animated cursorss. I hate flashing colors and pictures all over Myspaces. I delete pages and drop friends who adopt that...or never go to their sites. And the auto music thing that plays now? The ones that circumvent the myspace option to not auto-play? Incredibly annoying and pretentious (no, I don't want to hear your top five songs that you love, that all happen to be "hard" rap, that I would avoid like the plague anywhere else anyway).

My page is simple, dark backgrounds that consist of skulls or grim reapers or hot chicks with demon wings. Simple.

Curse my slow commenting. Belay first part of above remark.

I saw them on "SeekingRich.com",too.Maybe they want make more new friends.You can contact them on that website.

As a 24 year old, I admit having been briefly offended by your derision of my generation, but then I realized that I hate most of us too. The TRL generation - we never had a chance. I thought I just didn't like people. Maybe I need to become one of those weirdo 20-somethings who hangs out with wannabe hippie 40 year-olds.

You'd better stay away from my Myspace profile then Shadows, because I'm now forcing everyone to listen to "The Happiness Hotel." :)

Can't. Wait. For. Iron Man.

mswas: That's should be the plan even if Mrs. Pink is out by then! Just think how much good it will do her! (And those of us close enough to join the festivities!)

I'll just swill that around for a moment, before commenting something about going to the Louvre to see the Mona Lisa, but settling for a bunch of Superbad cock doodles because that's all that was on display. Or maybe I'm just bitter because I'm too old to find a reason to wear a ball-gown these days.

Zuffle: Ha! There's always a reason to wear a ball gown, you just have to ignore the stares of disbelief. That's what I do when I go grocery shopping.

Julie, believe me: if I wore a ball gown the stares would be more of dyspepsia than disbelief.

How was the birthday weekend?

But surely the stares of disbelief are the entire reason to wear a ballgown? That's why I do it anyway...

It was fabulous. I woke up Sunday morning still drunk, bruised, and covered in frosting...the true sign of a great birthday.

The Happiness Hotel is allowed. There's always an exception made for Muppets, Juie

idea pitch: do a survey of the readers on here; ages, nationalities etc
I'm just as interested as you are.

Hee...ALWAYS, Shadows.

Cat, they did a readership survey a little while back, in the summer maybe? I don't remember much of the results other than there's a lot of girls and we drink a lot. :)

It was fabulous. I woke up Sunday morning still drunk, bruised, and covered in frosting...the true sign of a great birthday.

Now that sounds like a truly great birthday.

LENS. MOTHERFUCKING. FLARE.

I was classmates with a douchetool who paid 30,000 dollars a year to use the fucking lens flare (repeatedly) in a design school. Yeah, McDouche only lasted one year. I now only know him as that "lens flaring asshole who constantly sends me unwanted apps about knights and shit on a Facebook account I barely use".

"It's better than the real thing!" - douchetool

Julie's Tip of the Day: If you have been drinking since 3:00 in the afternoon, and then did a car bomb, and then did more shots, and oh my holy Godtopus THEN drank more beer...don't go home to your birthday cupcakes.

There was frosting EVERYWHERE...I can't tell if I ate them or tried to fuck them. Knowing me? Both.

Am I relieved or disappointed that it's physically impossible for me to drink that much?

I just don't know!

Holy shit is Tax Day (Eve) busy! Burning that clock right up. Don't YOU wish you had a job where people asked you where to get tax forms (and no, they are not here) and thus failing that, how to print them, alllllllll day? You certainly don't get bored.

Sigh...let's add birthday cupcakes to the list of foods to keep away from Julie if you don't want them molested...

Now to go buy some frosting for a late birthday present...oh, the things I could do...

Julie - First, happy belated birthday! Secondly, I'm with you on the prom dresses. Another idea? Wear old bridesmaid dresses when you're out and about. When the hell else are you going to wear those ugly things? Plus, it's better to be overdressed than underdressed, I always say.

Well, MY day is crawling along at a sloth's pace. Monday's usually go by so damn quickly! Julie - so glad you had a fun birthday. What flavor were the cupcakes? I'll wait while you check your crevices.

Hee hee...Shadows, FYI I prefer chocolate frosting.

I had to bring the cupcakes them to work today, lest I molest...the rest. RHYMING!!!

...having tasted many a young females, prom night is a time for reflection and adventure. We should not hinder this generation's furry and excitement. My best friend in college was a Chinamen and he let me take his sister to her prom, we immediately got a room at a cheap motel and I told her about life and it's many challenges. Clinton and McCain are both of the same cloth, NAFTA was not a good idea. That bitch Marilyn Monroe made a sex tape, what is her fucking problem, crazy bitch. She fucked up when she sang happy birthday to the president, crazy cunt singing during the missile crisis.

Prom season. Bah. I never saw the big deal about prom. I never went to mine, I stayed home and surfed the web, then went to work the next morning. Possibly this is because I hate wearing dresses with a passion. Possibly because our prom was held on a boat. Possibly also because fancy food tends to upset my stomach, I didn't want to pay upwards of 50 bucks for the 'privilege', and I generally feel stupid dancing in the privacy of my own home, let alone in public to songs I hate, with people I either hate or will never see again, in clothing I hate.

Ahem. Also, to either Alex The Odd or the snooty biochemist, I have a question. This tryptophan stuff helps you make serotonin? What's tryptophan in?

"Am I relieved or disappointed that it's physically impossible for me to drink that much?"

Jay, it fascinates me that you get wasted easily, but you took two Vicodin and didn't feel anything. You are a chemical mystery. Of course, if I took two Vicodin I would die, because I am allergic to opioids.

Julie, this article might make you laugh. Guy with a similar night, except he lacked cupcakes.

Prom is a right of passage. It is also a precursor to future Valentine's Days of hating the opposite sex.

I guess I enjoyed my proms. Junior year I went solo and had a great time. Senior I had a date, a friend, had fun, and almost got kicked out of Shoney's.

Wear old bridesmaid dresses when you're out and about. When the hell else are you going to wear those ugly things?

I had an old bridesmaid dress that was the color of the yellow line on the highway. It was for a yellow and tangerine wedding. Big Bird would have been embarrassed to wear this thing.

I actually feel a bit sorry for the high school generation. I'm 35 and I think that beauty standards have gotten a hell of a lot more onerous for young women. When I was in high school, a dude could've given a rat's ass about your bikini line and Brazilians existed...in Brazil. Teeth whitening? Please.

I also think the internet has made everything so public. My fuck-ups were confined to word of mouth whereas one screw-up today could end up on Facebook or whatever in perpetuity. I think that's an enormous amount of pressure. Also, I could delude myself about my status in other people's lives - no caller i.d., so I could always imagine Tommy called me and didn't blow me off, no weird online friend hierarchies, so I could always believe my best friend was my best friend and that was it. Also, if you liked somebody you had to actually get some balls and either approach them or (gasp!) call them on the phone. No coy e-mails, no cyber-stalking.

I don't know. I think the internet is so wonderful in some ways, but I do worry for my daughter and the impact virtual everything will have on her.

All my bridesmaid dresses (not that there are hundreds, but I've had to wear five) were normal enough. The dumbest one, actually, was from my brother's wedding. It was a corseted red ballgown that made me look like a saloon whore.

that made me look like a saloon whore.

Hey socalled, how does this match with your image of Sarina being a leprechaun?

Oh, and Sarina, that was hilarious.

"I had an old bridesmaid dress that was the color of the yellow line on the highway. It was for a yellow and tangerine wedding."

AHHH. I'm about to have my first, and hopefully last, bridesmaid experience this summer. Not only do I loathe weddings, but my best friend's biggest color inspiration seems to be Rainbow Bright.

Ha! Twig, I love it.

Sarina, my one girlfriend had us wear these light pink halter style dresses for her wedding. They were EVIL.

My sister is getting married next weekend, and the dresses are actually cute...knee length, strapless, and they're a pretty blue. I can actually let her live.

To make things better in reference to the yellow dress, it was handmade, poorly constructed, and was not lined.

I looked like an invalid. The MOH had it worse with a pale yellow (in contrast to the orange yellow of our dresses), unlined dress that you could see through. All the way though.

It was the trashiest wedding I have ever seen. The couple is now divorced as the bride was the town ho-bag.

Holy crap Melody, that sounds horrifying. At least my ugly pink dress was well made.

My good friend and former roommate Nene was also a bridesmaid for the Pink Peeps wedding, so we had a "Let's wear our monstrosity of a dress, get wasted, watch The Wedding Crashers, and then destroy the Pink Satin of Satan" girls night. It was cathartic.

Best financial advice I ever got: donate your bridesmaid dress to charity and claim it the next tax season.

Good Godtopus. I'm gonna have to be assured that there will be an open bar for me to be involved in any kind of bridesmaid activities.

Julie, I would have preferred pink. Hell, I would have preferred a trash bag with a head hole and two arm holes. At least it would have looked fashionable.

I was also in a November wedding that was black and pink. The only problem was that the bride wanted outdoor pictures in strapless, tea length dresses. In November. I think that the temp was 40 degrees that day and the wedding was a night.

Tell me that made sense.

I know a girl who got married at 18, and had her bridesmaids wear spandex short-suits that zipped up. In totally unrelated news, she is now about to marry her fourth husband. It's a shotgun wedding - she's pregnant with her 6th (SIXTH!!!!) child. All of the children have different fathers. For this wedding, she's classing it up and the dresses are those two piece getups like Alex Mack wore to the prom in 10 Things I Hate About You, with exposed navels and those trashtastic waist chains that Pamela Anderson is always wearing with her bikinis. This bitch is 29 years old. Her name is Chastity. If there is a God, He's a drunken miscreant laughing his ass off on a cloud someplace.

how does this match with your image of Sarina being a leprechaun?

Well, it's a clash, but I think she's intentionally trying to distance herself from "pub wench" or a more likely and suitable Pride of Eire image.

Not that all Irish girls have to be pub wenches. It's just that they all want to be.

!!! Sarina, SIX kids and she's one year older than me?! :fans self: That made me claustrophobic.

Her name is Chastity.

That's too good.

Her name is Chastity

I have to wonder about people who do things like this to their children. Even if a kid beats the irony odds and doesn't end up a complete slut, there's still going to be whispering and pointing all her life.

And it's sexist to boot -- you don't hear of any boys named "Forbearance" or "Puritan" or "Chief Keeps-It-In-His-Pants." (I especially like that last one, but children are not good at hyphenating.)

I thought Ms. Yellow and Tangerine was bad for sleeping with the best man prior to her wedding. I should also mention that the best man was the groom's brother.

Yeah.

29 and 6 kids? Someone needs to gift wrap a box of jimmy hats and give her those as a wedding present.

True Story: I once dated a guy whose brother was named Eunuch. His mother didn't know the meaning of the word; she just thought it sounded "smart" and either his father also didn't know or just didn't care. I would guess the mother was going for something like Eugene, but you can't really riddle the mysteries of the functionally retarded. Anyway, the kids tried to get the parents to legally change this poor guy's name for YEARS but they wouldn't do it, so when he turned 16 he got legally emancipated and did it himself. The mother also has a poodle named Cochon, which she seems to think is classy. Needless to say, she does not speak French. Thanksgivings are awesome at their house.

Her name is Chastity

I am laughing so hard right now I am crying. Real tears. If only you guys knew why.

"If only you guys knew why."

PLEASE tell me it's because you know her, Kolby. I dearly need a drinking buddy with whom to commisserate about the time she got arrested for trying to rent out two of her kids as window washers, or the time she got arrested for having sex in public (in a parking lot across the street from the police station), or the time she got arrested for drunk and disorderly conduct (in a church).

Aw, poor Eunuch. What newborn deserves that?

My mother's one nursing instructor named her son Rainbow Sunshine. She may as well have changed it to Sissy Pleasekickmyass.

PS: tt_marie and Kolby, thank you for the birthday wishes above, I am an asshole and forgot to thank you earlier :)

Sarina - nope, not her. I do know a Chastity, though.

Julie - don't sweat it. Your remaining brain cells are working hard enough today.

My cousin dropped out of school and started working for a catering service part- time. On her second job she had to serve a themed wedding where she lives in the Bronx.

The theme: Pimps and Paupers.

I shit you not.

She said it only lasted halfway through the reception before the cops shut down the party after two fights broke out.

The theme: Pimps and Paupers.

WOW. Klassy.

Julie, I know.

What I can't understand (among many things) is how they even knew what pauper meant. I guess they saw the Disney movie. But damn, what I took from The Prince and the Pauper was to appreciate what you already have. Apparently they saw it as an opportunity display effects of massive amounts of lead paint poisoning and the pros of forced sterilization.

What I can't understand (among many things) is how they even knew what pauper meant.

That is a very valid point.

When I finally marry my imaginary boyfriend the theme is going to be Beavers and Cocks. The bridesmaids will be outfitted in fur-lined pantsuits while the groomsmen will wear fedoras covered in the feathers of whichever endangered bird is most handy. I will not be telling the guests this, in the hopes that they will misread the theme entirely and come dressed as walking genitalia.

And then we will drink.

Sarina, on behalf of Tyler Durden, you've got some FUCKED up friends.

Oh, neither of those two are my friends, Jay. They're just some weirdos I know. Everyone I know is pretty much goddamn crazy. My actual friends, though...now they're messed up.

I found the bitch-fit response to Dustin's Prom Night review kinda surprising. Everything he said was absolutely defensible and I, along with all of my peers (25 - 30, generally) would concur. Maudlin whining seems to be a hallmark of Generation Douchebag.

Sarina, your comments make me fear Minneapolis.

"Sarina, your comments make me fear Minneapolis."

Well, you already know I live here...did you need another reason to be afraid? Seriously, though, this joint's full of freaks and crazies. It's the bipolar weather. It does things to you.

"When I finally marry my imaginary boyfriend the theme is going to be Beavers and Cocks."

Just pray the invitations don't accidentally get mailed to a nudist colony. If so, the surf 'n turf spread will take on whole new level of meaning.

I look fucking good in a fedora.

When I finally marry my imaginary boyfriend the theme is going to be Beavers and Cocks. The bridesmaids will be outfitted in fur-lined pantsuits while the groomsmen will wear fedoras covered in the feathers of whichever endangered bird is most handy. I will not be telling the guests this, in the hopes that they will misread the theme entirely and come dressed as walking genitalia.

Why half-ass it? Wedding costumes cost too much anyway..just have a nude wedding...wearing only your train and garter belt. The groom would wear a bowtie. Slipping on the ring takes on a whole new meaning...

Ha! Let's see, my something old could be my grandmother dying of shock, something new is the garter, something borrowed is the veil, and something blue...the color of my lips as my naked ass freezes on the altar? Or should I just change the spelling to blew and have it be the groom?

Ah, Julie, I was so hoping there would be a groom and another bride. Especially if you're getting married somewhere exotic, where the domesticity laws are, um, "relaxed."

samantha, quick fun fact for absolutely no reason: Brazilian waxing is hardly a rule in Brazil. Believe it or not, we never get why you guys use that name.

As for the rest, I can only insist that we are mass-producing those idiots in the name of money and looks, and then we complain they're idiots and that they should get a grip. As a decent Pajiban, it's only left to say get off my lawn and turn down that freaking noise.

And I don't know squat about weddings and dresses and imaginary friends, as I'm a very well-adjusted person. I do my pills and therapy never out of a strict schedule.

Tryptophan is simply an essential amino acid that is in most protein containing foods. The urban legend is that turkey makes you sleepy because it contains tryptophan which is used to make serotonin and melatonin the latter of which plays a role in sleep/wake cycle programming. Really, there is no more tryptophan in turkey than in many other foods you consume on a daily basis.
The reason my dander got up is that I dislike it when people, put out false health information as fact in an attempt to either seem smart or scare others. It seemed snooty, and it kinda was, but its for the good of the interested pajiban nation.
On serotonin: If you are depressed or suffering from some other serotonin imbalance, tryptophan won't help/affect you (i.e. if you are depressed turkey won't help). Tryptophan is only converted to serotonin after many highly regulated steps.
The thing Alex the Odd was talking about was this myth that grilling your meat can hurt you. Tryptophan is (1) not formed spontaneously by grilling - it's ring structure is too fragile, (2) not dangerous - at all.
For clarification I did four years of biochemistry/bio-inorganic/inorganic chemistry undergrad and now I'm about half-way done with my MD. Not strictly a biochemist, but maybe more than some.

"Audiences today, they're so savvy in regards to what they want to see or don't want to see. Particularly a younger audience, they pretty much make up their own mind. With prom season also at hand, that brings an element of fun."

I can't figure out who he is trying to decieve here.

If a lie is told and no one believes it, does it make a sound?

If a lie is told and no one believes it, does it make a sound?

Or if a lie is told and the only people who would have believed it are the ones who would consume the shit sandwich no matter what they're told, are their egos still pumped up by a fellating studio hack?

Not only am I not one of the texterazzi (I'm 21, right in the middle of your demographic there), I spend much of my time thinking up new ways to destroy them as people. Although mostly I just resort to deadpan sarcasm, an almost sociopathic sense of humor that includes frequent abortion jokes, and a golf club, usually a nice 3 wood.

"I'm so sorry, twig...that really does suck. At least you're not...ummm...Switzerland?"
Shadows of Dakaron

Oy! We get movies and games before the Brits do

Gargumma - fascinating about the Brazilian. And there I was, all too willing to buy into the stereotype that y'all walk around in string bikinis all day from the age of eight on.

Best review. She is beautiful. I saw her at "w e a l t h yR o m a n c e.c o m" last week. It is said she is very picky about guys on that site.

Oh, you don't wanna put me in a string bikini... They're too itchy these days.

IRON MAN. [the return of] Lost. Dark Knight. I'm starting to feel happy again.

PS Can anything be done about the spam that's infecting this site? Fuck it's annoying!

Quick, way-behind question:

I was born in December 1978. Graduated HS in May 1996. Started college in August 1996 and graduated (after switching majors and schools twice) in December 2001.

What the hell generation does that make me?

P.S. - Jools, if you're reading this, am I invited to that wedding?

Please, you're the groom :)