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Now We Know What's at the Bottom of Donald Trump's Drained Swamp

By Dustin Rowles | Horror | April 20, 2017 |

By Dustin Rowles | Horror | April 20, 2017 |


Look: My mother lives in a trailer home, 75 percent of my family members have lost their teeth by the age of 40, and many of my relatives met their spouses at family reunions (oh, how I wish I were kidding), so God knows, it takes a lot to bring out my inner elitist (or, “putting on airs,” as my family calls it).

But Jesus Christ, y’all. JESUS CHRIST, Donald Trump is completely ruining the mystique of the White House. It’s one thing to have a President you can have a beer with, but does he have to have friends who use beer koozies? I swear to God, this looks like my family when they wear their WalMart best and put in their teeth to go out for a fancy meal at Bonanza (Fun Fact: I thought that “salad dressing” was Thousand Island until my early 20s, when I realized there were other kinds of salad dressing. Thanks, Bonanza!)

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Oh and fuck all of you classless seed ticks. Have some fucking respect.

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Yes, I know, Mom! I know! But COME ON.

Exactly.

via Jake Tapper