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Guides | September 24, 2008 | Comments (75)


A little over a year ago, Dustin selected his favorite film trilogy, Evil Dead, and then backed his way into the decision by carefully setting out criteria that would support his point. Although subjective criteria can never fully guarantee an airtight process, this was a rather idiot-proof strategy. One could certainly disagree, but actually wrangling Ash Williams to the ground and pinning him into a chokehold was pretty hard to do. Then came the inevitable announcement of fourth installment of the series, confirmed by Sam Raimi, which disqualified the Evil Dead franchise from the rules — as set out by our (somewhat) fearless leader — needed to establish a perfect trilogy:

I spent an inordinate amount of time coming up with a set of rules and limitations specifically designed, in my mind at least, to create a scenario in which the Evil Dead Trilogy could be considered the best trilogy of all time. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to figure out a way to disqualify every single trilogy better than The Evil Dead threesome? Oh, shut the fuck up — it’s not that hard. Whatever. Point being: It’s all moot now.

Then, Dustin threatened to rewrite the Guide and substitute the next best fit for his rules, The Mighty Ducks trilogy. Well, Pajibans, for better or worse, I’m determined not to let that happen, and you may not agree with me, but it’s sure as hell better than letting those Disneyfied piles of crap skate onto the trophy shelf. Now, I’m not gonna go through the process of reassigning criteria for the best trilogy and duly picking off the offending trilogies. However, since The Bourne Trilogy was described as “the only real competition,” I feel rather obligated to shoot that one down. The Jason Bourne films were, admittedly, a great ride, but, as Dustin points out, they did lack a human element that would otherwise allow us to at least want to get inside Bourne’s mind. Instead, as a protagonist, Bourne is all go-go-go, and while we’re certainly happy to follow along, this emotional detachment quickly grows rather homogenous and certainly doesn’t permit any sort of epic scope to the trilogy. So, let’s see exactly why The Godfather trilogy was originally disqualified:

Godfather II may be the best sequel of all time, but most of us would simply like to go on believing that Godfather III never existed, thus disqualifying the Godfather trilogy from competition.

Let’s be totally honest here and acknowledge the main sources of disappointment with Godfather III: (1) Francis Ford Coppola’s controversial casting of his own daughter, Sofia Coppola; and 2) the apparent drastic change in the Michael Corleone (Al Pacino) character.

That first complaint is, quite frankly, bullshit and not worth arguing, but it seems worth it to mention that this casting decision could have been much worse. When Winona Ryder, who was originally set to play Mary Corleone, dropped out during the first day of filming, the studio wanted to replace her with either Madonna or Julia Roberts. Considering those alternatives, Sofia Coppola was a relative casting dream.

The second complaint is much more understandable. In a sense, watching Michael search for redemption and reconciliation brings about the same sort of issue bought up by some hardcore Terminator fans in relation to Terminator II: Judgment Day: Some audiences didn’t like seeing the kinder, gentler version of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s cyborg, now complicit in his own destruction. Of course, comparing Michael to a cyborg isn’t going to get us too far, but this analogy is meant to stress that the transformation of a film’s main character really does throw an audience for a loop. Folks didn’t take too kindly to the idea of Michael Corleone possessing a conscience or showing even a remote interest in confessing his sins. Admittedly, watching Michael Corleone return to totally kick some more ass in Part III would have held a certain satisfaction, but, honestly, the trilogy’s first two films can be re-watched indefinitely for that sort of thing. Part III draws out some of the inner workings of Michael’s character and strengthens the case of him as one of the greatest antiheroes of all time.

Let’s do this.

Obviously, we can’t discuss this trilogy in anywhere near its deserved depth, so we’re gonna concentrate on the main character, Michael Corleone, that ties all three films together. In addition, despite the many phases through which the trilogy progresses, Coppola infuses it all with a common perfumery that is unique to the Corleone family saga. Throughout all The Godfather trilogy, each film follows the same basic narrative structure of beginning with a family celebration and ending with a montage of vengeful deaths intended to settle “all family business.” Also in each film, Michael loses those he loves the most: Appolonia (Simonetta Stefanelli), Kay (Diane Keaton), and Mary, respectively. Even though Michael has always acted to protect his family and emerged victorious from his individual battles, he still loses everything in the end.

The Godfather (1972): “There wasn’t enough time, Michael. There just wasn’t enough time.”

I’m going to reference my original review of The Godfather, which concentrated mainly on Michael Corleone and his rise to power. Here, Coppola introduces the saga of a Sicilian mafia family and the transfer of power from Don Vito Corleone (Marlon Brando) to his youngest son, Michael. This part of the saga opens with the wedding of Connie Corleone (Talia Shire); includes the pivotal act of Michael avenging the attempt on his father’s life; and closes with the baptism by fire, which establishes Michael as Godfather to Connie’s child and also, by the simultaneous murder of Michael’s enemies, inaugurates him as the new Godfather, Don Michael Corleone.

As we watch Vito carry out the family business while Michael learns the ropes, we urge their legendary actions on. Vito presents himself as the virtuous gangster, the honorable family man who (as we see in Part II) helps his Italian immigrant community rid itself of the Black Hand extortionists, who have been amplifying the struggles of Italian immigrants by demanding “protection money.” As an audience, we both admire and respect Vito as he assists widows and works favors for those who call him Godfather and promise a service in return. We root for his victory in his battles and feel a sense of justice when he prevails. However, Vito is not satisfied with merely ruling the underground and, although he knows that time has run out for him to be respected by American society at large, Vito hopes that Michael can have a different sort of future:

I never wanted this for you. I live my life, I don’t apologize to take care of my family. And I refused to be a fool dancing on the strings held by all of those big shots. That’s my life I don’t apologize for that. But I always thought that when it was your time that you would be the one to hold the strings. Senator Corleone. Governor Corleone. Something.

The Godfather: Part II (1974): “I know it was you Fredo. You broke my heart.”

In this sequel, we’re essentially given a double bang that emphasizes, in Coppola’s words, the “Sicilian waltz of vengeance” that father and son perform in unison. The film’s parallel structure illustrates the symbiotic connection between Vito Corleone (now played by Robert De Niro in flashbacks) and his youngest son. Essentially, Part II details Michael’s further descent into the “family business” and also recounts Vito’s Sicilian childhood, including his family’s murder by local Mafia and his subsequent escape to America, and, finally, his rise to power as the new Don Corleone. Arguably, Vito creates his own version of the American dream by way of subversion of the justice system. Michael, of course, follows in his father’s footsteps but proves to be a much more Machiavellian and ruthless Mafia leader. Thematically, Part II presents the breakdown of role that family plays in modern society, which is initially illustrated by the jacked-up marriages of Connie and Fredo (John Cazale). Later on, Michael’s marriage also disintegrates when Kay finally comes to the conclusion that her husband will never change and take the family to legitimacy as promised. Kay even aborts Michael’s third child to cut short the Corleone legacy of violence and also because she knew Michael would never forgive her, so she would be released from her Mafia marriage.

Like the first film, Part II opens at the celebration of Anthony’s first communion, which is yet another scene that illustrates the empty displays of religious belief by the Corleone family. Like his father, Michael puts on a public display of these Catholic sacraments in an attempt to legitimize his family. During the festivities, Michael, like his father, privately conducts business in his shadowy offices. The enigmatic face of the youngest Corleone son, now the head of the family, almost completely disappears into the frame’s darkness as he shrouds his full presence from his opponents.

In flashbacks, Coppola shows us how the criminal traditions of Sicily had followed Vito into America and amplified the struggles of immigrants. After assassinating the Black Hand extortionist, Vito begins his rise to power and an irrevocable life of crime. As Part II progresses, we watch Michael continue to ascend the criminal ladder as he simultaneously descends further in his corruption. Towards the end of Part II, both Vito and Michael avenge earlier acts of treachery. Vito kills the Sicilian Mafia boss, who murdered his family, upon returning to Sicily to exact vengeance against those who murdered his family and father. Michael was compelled to avenge the attempt on his father’s life. Both were pulled into a corrupted way of life by a seemingly inescapable Sicilian pattern of vengeance.

By the end of the film, Michael controls his world of organized crime after having killed many enemies, including his arch rival, Hyman Roth. For the treachery of his remaining brother, Fredo, Michael orders him killed and, from a window in his Lake Tahoe compound, Michael stonily watches as his enforcer, Al Neri (Richard Bright), does the deed. As Michael sits alone and remorseless in his isolated compound, his victories are meaningless; he is without the respect of American society that he and Vito both so desperately wanted. More importantly, Michael has lost his family, having destroyed everything in his desperate bid to protect them from the horrors of the world. Alone with his bittersweet success and tattered memories of the past, Michael remains wrapped in a prison of self-righteousness. Michael was always convinced throughout both of the first two films that all of his crimes were motivated by his desire to protect those that he loved. However, at this point, his acts have all but destroyed his family. Michael isn’t quite a tragic hero yet, but his successes have come at quite a steep price and the true American dream still eludes him.

The Godfather: Part III (1990): “Just when I thought I was out, They pull me back in.”

This third installment, while nowhere near as close to perfect as the first two Godfather films, is still a bloody wonderful movie. Well, it is. If you go and watch it again, you’ll probably reach the common conclusion that it’s not as “bad” as you seem to recall. Coppola and Puzo probably got a bit too crazy with interweaving of the film’s plot with historical intricacies of the Vatican Banking scandal, but, altogether, the third film truly pulls the entire multi-generational saga together and provides a proper ending for the tragic figure of Michael.

At the beginning of the film, Michael is inducted into the Order of St. Sebastian as a Knight because of his sizable donation to the Roman Catholic church in the name of the “Vito Corleone Foundation.” Afterwards, we are reintroduced to the remaining Corleone family members at a celebratory party. In the absence of Tom Hagen (Robert Duvall), Connie has stepped in as Michael’s confidante and ally. We also meet Vincent (Andy Garcia), a character conceived by Puzo and Coppola for this sequel. Supposedly, Vincent was conceived within the first film, up against a wall and during Connie’s wedding reception, by Sonny Corleone (James Caan) and Lucy Mancini (Jeannie Linero). Vincent is Michael’s heir apparent as the head of the Corleone crime family, and, as such, Coppola crafted him as a combination of the four Corleone men: the temper of Sonny, the smarts of Vito, the calculations of Micheal, and the warmth of Fredo. At first, Vincent is clearly the family’s black sheep, but he slowly and cleverly edges his way into the family business by methodically eliminating Michael’s enemies and also seducing his daughter, Mary.

While Michael himself appears to have changed quite a bit in the 20 years since he sat alone in his Lake Tahoe compound, his essence hasn’t changed so much as his own perception of it. As stated above, Michael has always been on the prowl for a sort of redemption in the form of legitimacy, but his tone switches from conspiratorial (in Part II) to confessional (In Part III). Michael’s suffering and search for redemption are spawned by the full realization and sheer magnitude of his errors of judgment. Never before had he admitted to the awfulness of his deeds and, indeed, had always justified them as completely necessary to protect his own family. Michael truly thought he was doing the right thing to protect them, but as the family head, he led almost exclusively with his mind and not nearly enough with his heart. In this third film, Michael is struggling to cope with the fact that, despite his actions, everyone in his wake always ends up dead. Previously, Michael always thought his love for his family would insulate him from lapses in judgment, but now he finally questions whether all of his murderous acts, all the way back to avenging the attempt on his father’s life, were entirely the wrong solution. During the whole of those first two films, Michael singularly focused upon his family’s future safety, and he was so convinced that he is doing the right thing that it blinded him to the possibility of being wrong.

After traveling to the same Sicilian village (standing in for Corleone) that appears in the other two movies, Michael now wonders where he went wrong and whether it was his heart or mind that betrayed him and led him to do evil. This anguish is the source of Michael’s monologue as he kneels alone by the coffin of a lifelong cohort:

Goodbye my old friend. You could have lived a little longer, I could be closer to my dream. You were so loved, Don Tommasino. Why was I so feared, and you so loved? What was it? I was no less honorable. I wanted to do good. What betrayed me? My mind? My heart? Why do I condemn myself so? I swear, on the lives of my children: Give me a chance to redeem myself, and I will sin, no more.

As an individual, Michael pretty much realizes that he doesn’t deserve redemption in the eyes of God, but he does ask for a chance at forgiveness. Just as with all of his seemingly monstrous acts as Don Corleone, Michael is largely trying to secure his family’s future. Now, he’s realizing that, despite everything that he’s done and all of the people that he’s killed to protect his family, they are still in danger. All of the murders he committed were, in his mind, the only thing that could have kept the Corleone family in power and from certain extinction, whether perceived or real. Now, even this chance at redemption that Michael seeks isn’t really for his benefit either. Ultimately, all that Michael wants is to die with the knowledge that the future generations will be free from the burdens of his evil acts.

Meanwhile, Michael has also been attempting to buy his way into public legitimacy, also in the interest of his family’s future. Through the Vatican, Michael aims to be the controlling shareholder of Immobilare, a shady European real-estate conglomerate who, in utter hypocrisy, begins all meetings with a prayer. Eventually, Michael realizes that he’s merely made a lateral move from his Mafia leadership to an equally corrupt way of business with a faux-religious pretext. The hypocrisy of the church itself, ironically, parallels that of the Corleones throughout each of the films. Somehow, despite all of his family’s empty displays of religion, Michael now expects that the church, either in its secular or spiritual sense, can some how cure the future from his past sins and secure the Corleones’ future legitimacy. Unfortunately, despite Michael’s intelligence and ability to reason, he is quite wrong in this instance.

The Godfather: Part III, therefore, illustrates the immutability of Michael’s entrance into a life of crime. As Michael nears death, he comes to the terrible realization that, no matter what he does, nothing can erase his terrible deeds or protect his family from their future effects. Still, Michael’s unquenchable desire as a protector continues to drive additional futile attempts at legitimacy. Inevitably, despite outward appearances of the Corleone family edging out of the criminal underworld, Michael’s children (specifically, Mary) will ultimately pay for the sins of their father. Just like Vito, who never wanted the Mafia life for his youngest son, Michael himself is running out of time, and he needs a successor, pronto, and, by the way, he’d certainly like Mary to stop making out with her cousin, Vincent, if that’s not too much to ask.

At this point, Michael makes his final mistake by passing down the Corleone throne to Vincent. For what it’s worth, the fact that Sofia Coppola plays Mary awkwardly and, well, unprofessionally, actually adds to the doubt concerning Vincent’s motives in succeeding Michael as Don Corleone. Vincent, who is very handsome and something of a womanizer, may have been a Corleone outsider for most of his life, but he gets to know Michael well enough to figure out his weakness, family, and, more specifically, his two children. Vincent, I am convinced, never had more than a passing affection for Mary but, instead, used her as a pawn, so that Michael would offer him succession if Vincent would break things off with Mary. So, just after Michael had sworn on his children’s lives, he almost immediately hands over control of all Corleone family affairs to Vincent, who had already proven himself to be just as impulsive and hotheaded as his father. As a leader, Vincent is sure to return the Corleones to their violent past. What’s even worse is that, while Michael doesn’t tell Vincent to kill anyone after becoming Godfather, he knows of Vincent’s violent tendencies and doesn’t exactly stop him. Michael’s ultimate sin is one of omission, and he pays for it with his daughter’s life.

Meanwhile, the family prepares to watch Michael’s son, Anthony, make his opera debut in Sicily, and Michael’s enemies hire an assassin to kill him at the opera house. For his part, Vincent knows the drill and arranges to have his underlings settle all family business (this time, he means it, dammit!) during the opera, which just happens to portray a vendetta in a Sicilian village and ends up running parallel to the offstage montage of violence. So, we get one final bloodbath, much like the endings of the first two films. Initially, the assassin fails to kill Michael during the performance but makes another attempt outside the opera house, hitting Michael in the shoulder and fatally wounding Mary, who dies in Michael’s arms from a bullet meant for him. In killing Mary, Coppola aimed to punish Michael to a far greater degree than by merely killing him. Instead, now Michael must continue to live with the torturous knowledge that his daughter died for his sins.

So, the tragic hero is now fully qualified. Michael made that fateful decision, decades earlier, to protect his family by avenging his father’s attempted murder, and he’s spent his life, and the life of others, paying for it. Even though Michael spends his last years desperately trying to peddle backwards, he just can’t turn back the clock to that moment before he fired that gun during the first film. As Vito Corleone lamented, there just isn’t enough time for that. Through Michael, however, Mario Puzo and Francis Ford Coppola created three films of epic nature that not only revolve around one of the greatest antiheroes of all time but also make a damn riveting qualifier for The Real Greatest Trilogy of All Time. Sorry, Evil Dead, but we’ll see you soon.

Agent Bedhead (a.k.a. “Kimberly”) lives in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She can also be found at agentbedhead.com.


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Comments

Go to the mattresses Pajibians.

Posted by: Amanda47 at September 23, 2008 5:06 PM

With the exception of Kay Adams being sorely miscast (Diane Keaton), one/two of my favorites of all time.

Puzo's Godfather book pales in comparison to the first movie, in my opinion.

And I can completely forgive Andy Garcia for the mess that is GIII, because, well, he's Andy Garcia.

Posted by: Be Adequite! at September 23, 2008 5:08 PM

I hate these stupid gangster movies for several reasons:

1) I have a friend who watches all three movies, back-to-back, before making any important decisions. This affected me personally when he lived with me for six months. He's also schizophrenic, so he makes a lot of "important" decisions.

2) These movies have inspired too many Jersey idiots to think that being "Italian" (I use the term loosely, since none of these mouth-breathers could point to The Boot on a map, much less have they ever been to Italy) means being a fat, homophobic asshole with a god-complex. No, being Italian means dressing nicely and saying "ciao" a lot.

3) In addition to Jersey, I also hate New York City. That's because I live in Philly and know (KNOW, not think) that both places are extremely overrated.

Try again for best trilogy, dude. Seriously.

The End.

Posted by: Estelle at September 23, 2008 5:11 PM

"...That first complaint is, quite frankly, bullshit and not worth arguing, but it seems worth it to mention that this casting decision could have been much worse...."


ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?!?!?

Look, buddy, you wanna swallow Coppola's load that's your prerogative, but don't dismiss a VALID grievance. Sophia was the ORIGINAL Jar JAr, she ruined that movie, NO...OBLITERATED it.

What the FUCK, are YOU smokin'?

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 23, 2008 5:12 PM

Oh and another thing, there is another trilogy here which you, jackasses, are ignoring, either by design or because you are idiots (frankly I think it might be both):

The ORIGINAL, the only, the no special edition touchy feely crap, no prequel, Star. Wars.

I have a real problem with this.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 23, 2008 5:21 PM

Who wrote this?

Posted by: Jay at September 23, 2008 5:26 PM

I'm partial to Air Bud: Golden Receiver, Air Bud: World Pup, and Air Bud: Seventh Inning Fetch.

I've never seen any of the Godfather films. Seriously. And I could care less. Beautifully written review, but still - I've got no interest in seeing them. I'll go sit at the end of the driveway again should anyone want to drive by and throw a Big Gulp at my head...

Posted by: Skittimus Maximus at September 23, 2008 5:27 PM

Skitt- while not a trilogy, Mannequin and Mannequin 2: On The Move are also fantastic back to backs.

Posted by: Be Adequite! at September 23, 2008 5:29 PM

Okay, I'll bite: I think you mean "couldn't care less".

But you know damn well there's more than three Air Buds! And what about now with these two movies about his talking puppies?

Yes! They made another talking Buds movie! And I looked at the dvd case to see if the blingy hip hop one was still there, and then hated that I remembered that from having read the back of the previous one. I need mental hazard pay sometimes.

Posted by: Jay at September 23, 2008 5:37 PM

Great writeup. I'll have to rewatch the trilogy this weekend.

Posted by: Weck at September 23, 2008 5:39 PM

I've never seen them either, Skits. I tried watching the first one a couple of times, but I always fell asleep after about fifteen minutes. I'm a chronic, raging insomniac, but these movies still make me soooooo damn sleepy.

Posted by: Sarina at September 23, 2008 5:46 PM

I re-watched the trilogy a few months ago and I absolutely LOVED it.

Great review, Kimberly.

Oh, and Andy Garciiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiaaaaaaa... yum.

Posted by: Sofía at September 23, 2008 5:54 PM

Depending on where you stand with regard to Dracula, Winona dropping from the film may have been a good thing. Bram Stoker's Dracula wouldn't have been made if Winona hadn't put the script on Coppola's desk and offered to star in it to make up for screwing him on the third Godfather movie.

Posted by: Chris Croy at September 23, 2008 5:58 PM

Well, I look silly now. There wasn't an author given earlier, I swear!

My fault, Jay. You're not silly... at least, not today. - AB

Posted by: Jay at September 23, 2008 6:04 PM

Haven't read yet but....SQUEE!

On second thought, it seems wrong to squee over the Godfather, like maybe Don Vito would think I am disrespecting him and the family. I am not, Godfather, please do not make me wake up to a horse head. Thank you.

Posted by: tt_marie at September 23, 2008 6:05 PM

No, Jay, I meant "I could care less" - I've got a tiny bit of care floating around in there, but just don't have the energy to go all out with a not caring at all attitude. In reality, I am capable of caring less, but I just choose not to.

[...pleasebuymyshittyexcusepleasebuymyshittyexcuse...]

Posted by: Skittimus Maximus at September 23, 2008 6:06 PM

Well, hey, withdrawal in disgust is not the same as apathy, right?

I'll buy it!

Posted by: Jay at September 23, 2008 6:16 PM

I agree with Agent Bedhead about the third film. Not spectacular, but not as bad as people make it out to be. And the first two more than make up for it.

My big Godfather crush was Sonny. I was really pissed when he died.

However, I'd say the first three Star Wars films should definately qualify. Also, I know it's not cool to like Lord of the Rings around these parts, but those films were spectacular. Admit it, you bastards!

Posted by: tt_marie at September 23, 2008 6:18 PM

The failure of Godfather 3 isn't described by major complaints, but by a million little ones. None of which I can remember right now because I blocked that movie out of my mind immediately after seeing it six years ago.

Posted by: Lucas at September 23, 2008 6:20 PM

I tried to watch Godfather I on tv once, but I couldn't get through it. I just did not care at all. Something about mafia/mob/gangster stuff just bores me to death (except in Boondock Saints, naturally). Maybe someday I'll go back and give it another try.

Posted by: Elfrieda at September 23, 2008 6:20 PM

Dammit! I refuse, REFUSE to recognize the existence of Godfather III. The same goes for any sequels to the Matrix, Pirates of the Caribbean, Legally Blonde, Miss Congeniality, Bridget Jones's Diary; any Star Wars prequels, and Spiderman III. My standards aren't much, but I'll cling to them with the tattered shreds of my movie-snob dignity. However, I will concede that the ONLY TWO Godfather films that exist comprise the duo-logy/bi-logy of all time.

Posted by: LB at September 23, 2008 6:20 PM

"...altogether, the third film truly pulls the entire multi-generational saga together and provides a proper ending for the tragic figure of Michael..."


No, it doesn't, AT ALL.

1. You get no inkling of what happened to the old crew, NONE.

2. Michael looks (and acts) like he should be peddling diabetic testing supplies at 4:00 am on the USA Network and has gone through this whole life changing journey. Yet, WHERE IS IT? you don't get any background as to WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED to him. Why is this ruthless man acting this way?

3. What the hell was George Hamilton DOING THERE?
I love the guy but C'mon!

4. Fat Tony and Andy Garcia's beef?
What was up with that? What was it about ...I don't know! It's not even hinted except vaguely.
Note that did NOT happen in any of the previous films. You KNEW exactly what was happening and why?

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 23, 2008 6:24 PM

Ignore superfluous: "?"

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 23, 2008 6:27 PM

I like to think of myself as relatively intelligent and appreciative of nuance (don't we all). But I must admit that although I love the Deniro portions of Godfather II, I could not for the life of me follow what the hell was going on with Hyman Roth and Cuba, despite seeing it originally on DVD and since then several times on cable. Then again, I liked the two sequels to the Matrix, so what do I know?

Posted by: stipe42 at September 23, 2008 7:05 PM

Do you have any idea what Diane Keaton's pussy tastes like when it's been soaking in apple juice all day?

Not half as sweet as the sports action you're gonna catch on ESPN every Sunday.

ESPN! Cowboys versus Redskins! Catch it!

Like a pussy soaked in apple juice.

Posted by: Dave at September 23, 2008 7:24 PM

Best movie trilogy of all time?

One Word: Bourne.

Second place was Indiana Jones - until the fuckin' fridge.

I have yet to see any of the Eastwood, Man With No Name, movies, but I hear they might be the next best trilogy.

Posted by: idiosynchronic at September 23, 2008 7:26 PM

I have yet to see any of the Eastwood, Man With No Name, movies

Kismet that you followed Dave's comment?


"The Good, The Bad and The Ugly" is one of the greatest examples of "Man, is this drag ass movie gonna pay off??? We've been wandering for hours". And then "The Ecstasy of Gold" and "The Trio" happen and you get your fucking answer.

Posted by: Jay at September 23, 2008 7:36 PM

I thank Agent Bedhead for having the guts to defend GF III. I agree it wasn't ás good as the first two movies, but there was still more than enough to love about it. I believe that if it hadn't had to measure up to the genius of the first two GF films, it would rank on it's own as a decent story and beautifully painted picture of a world that is so secretive and traditional (and just plain ridiculous) that to create a story about it that is not only moving but believable is all the justification it needs.

Posted by: Pants at September 23, 2008 7:42 PM

Dave: I shan't argue with your clearly well informed opinions on the felines of geriatric actresses and the marination thereof in the juices of fruits, but ESPN does not broadcast the NFL on Sundays as of 2007. It purchased the lucrative rights to Monday Night Football, and Sunday Night Football passed to NBC.

Posted by: stipe42 at September 23, 2008 7:47 PM

So very kismet. I wrote that and then back tracked to Dustin's original Trilogy post.

Posted by: idiosynchronic at September 23, 2008 8:00 PM

Quit your bellyachin', Buck Rogers. Sounds like, much the same as idiosynchronic, you're in for a treat!

Posted by: Jay at September 23, 2008 8:09 PM

Nobody? Patton Oswalt? His bit about Robert Evans doing the voice overs for ESPN?

Okay, fine. Pretending my lame-ass attempt at a reference (I guess it would be more of a direct quote) never existed and contributing to the discussion...

The Back to the Future trilogy. That is the greatest trilogy. They're so good, I don't even need to defend them. I'll just attack Godfather III instead.

Godfather I & II are easily among the greatest movies of all time, nobody's arguing that. Even though Bedhead did a great job defending III, it's still crap compared to the first two. I don't care that she was the director's daughter, Sofia Coppola was a horrible actress for the major role her character had.

Posted by: Dave at September 23, 2008 8:23 PM

You fucking know nothing cunts wouldn't know a goddamn trilogy if it bit you on your asses. The Godfather hands down is the greatest trilogy of all time. I'm not surprised some of you hacks would think otherwise, to many of you sons of bitches any movie that has a dick joke in it is considered a classic. Good work Agent Bedhead, I don't usually side with a skirt.

Posted by: Pookie at September 23, 2008 8:24 PM

Pretending my lame-ass attempt at a reference never existed...

You can't, Dave! I already branched out with GB&U and Gil Gerard! Hang tough!

Posted by: Jay at September 23, 2008 8:26 PM

I think it was a good choice in general. I have yet to see Godfather III just because everyone complains about how Sofia Coppola ruined the film when she was cast as Mary. I think I might watch the third one to really see how bad it is...because honestly the first two are very well made. I love gangster movies anyway, like Miller's Crossing (which was awesome!, the one with Ray Liotta and A Bronx Tale (I think Deniro was in that one). Scorsese does some good ones (I'm not sure if A Bronx Tale is a Scorsese film). I'm also just finishing up the 6th Season of The Sopranos and I must say that although these mafiosos strike me has homophobic and sexist, Tony is very forgiving towards one of his own who he comes to find out is gay (forget which episode, but it was a really good one in my opinion). In the end logic wins out, but it seems that general human weakness is more looked down upon that anything else, which can also be seen in most of the Godfather films. No one can stray from conservative notions of gender roles yet it seems that their existence in a immoral world where enemies are constantly eliminated compromises much of their traditionally accepted beliefs. It's the ultimate construction of the anti-hero, where you cheer for the bad guy against another worse bad guy...I can see why some commenters on here have issues with it.

Posted by: ph at September 23, 2008 8:36 PM

Best trilogy?

Blade.

Seriously.

Blarbidy blar blar.

Posted by: Alabamapink at September 23, 2008 9:29 PM

Surprised Dustin didn't choose Blade, Pinkster. We all know his HUGE Man-Crush on Ryan Reynolds.
And I suppose Guillermo of the Bull may give them some cred... Oh what am I saying!

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at September 23, 2008 9:37 PM

Regardless of whether one agrees or disagrees, I appreciate the time and thought put into this review. I love I and II, myself - I guess I'd have to watch III again to see if my feelings have changed.

Posted by: Cindy at September 23, 2008 10:15 PM

You missed out on the Bring it On trilogy
Scream trilogy
Halloweentown trilogy
Lord of the rings trilogy
American Pie trilogy
Muppets Movie trilogy
3 men and a baby trilogy
Look who's talking trilogy
and the classic
Porky's trilogy

Posted by: pontang at September 23, 2008 10:29 PM

I've seen GodfatherIII in bits and pieces. It has its moments, but calling it a worthy finale to the purported trilogy is a stretch. As for Sofia Coppola as Mary, well... she has great hair.

Posted by: DGM at September 23, 2008 10:36 PM

Ph- I'm a HUGE fan of gangster movies as well- guess since I've never had the unfortunate pleasure of living in Philly or Jersey...

Bronx Tale is directed by DeNiro; please tell me you've seen Casino as well?? I also highly recommend Donnie Brasco if you haven't seen it already.

If you liked Miller's Crossing, Boondock Saints is another fantastic Irish boys film- (can't go wrong with Willem Dafoe either).

The "one with Ray Liotta" is my personal favorite- Goodfellas- and also happens to be my all time favorite movie.

Just some suggestions from one Tony Soprano admirer to another...

Posted by: Be Adequite! at September 23, 2008 10:44 PM

Hey, one more movie and soon we'll all be chanting HELLBOY TRIOLOGY!

Posted by: Alex at September 23, 2008 10:44 PM

Whoa...whoa..NO! Greatest Dualogy of All Time, yes. Trilogy? No fucking way. Godfather III sealed that one. Unless you watched the alternate version where Tom Hagen was alive, Michael leaves the mob and watches Andy Garcia run the mob as his son, and Michael's daughter was played by up and coming actress Marisa Tomei (she could have done it, shut up. At least she wasn't 'Daddy's Little Trilogy Killer'.)

Posted by: Mike R. at September 23, 2008 10:49 PM

Wow. I can't believe all the hatred for these movies.

The Godfather Trilogy is one of the greatest of all time (for my money, the Man with No Name trilogy is #1. There's not a bad movie in that bunch).

More to the point, the Godfather Trilogy is the quintessential American dream story.

Posted by: BFFredo at September 23, 2008 10:51 PM

Actually, there are four Bring it On movies:
Bring it On
Bring it On Again
Bring it On: All or Nothing
Bring it On: In it to Win it
But good try.

What about the Mexico Trilogy? Yeah Once Upon A Time sucked (Enrique - REALLY!?) but the other two were legit. And I would've said Home Alone but that fourth one was made and, well, the first two make up for the third, but the fourth...gross.

Posted by: Kash at September 23, 2008 11:11 PM

And actually, Pink, Blade Trinity is the only one of the three that I own, but I'm with you there.

Posted by: Kash at September 23, 2008 11:13 PM

Having posted about the Mexico/Mariachi Trilogy before going back and reading the original disqualification for it, I feel dumb.

Maybe in another twenty years we can have a Lost Boys Trilogy to join the 'so bad it's good' list.

Posted by: Kash at September 23, 2008 11:17 PM

i sometimes find it helpful to wath the first TWO godfathers when making a decision, there are no faults in they; one can find oneself in tight spots without the right emotional distance and that all-important killer instinct so essential to this sold-out bullshit system-thing; true-that on the sillysequels to matrix, and as much as i love diane keaton, i might kind of feel way back in my mind where i dont worship these TWO films that she may have been miscast; boondock saints was mighty fine my first few times, including that crazy bearded fellow that told jokes, billy connely as a badass, priceless; the only other remotely close trio, be that nice case for spaghetti eastwood; fuck borne, fuck backfuture, except for huey lewis/mjfox opening montage, and watch millers crossing three times

Posted by: hdn at September 23, 2008 11:34 PM

oh, and the TWO evil dead films could very well compete with the TWO godfathas

Posted by: hdn at September 23, 2008 11:38 PM

Though I admit to not having seen Broadway Bound, does the Neil Simon trilogy have a shot? I loved both Brighton Beach Memiors and Biloxi Blues - which included Christopher Walken in yet another grand role.

Posted by: Cindy at September 23, 2008 11:51 PM

I've been a longtime defender of GFIII-- while it's not nearly as good as the first two films of the trilogy, it's still riveting. Sofia Coppola's performance is lousy, but not to the extent that it ruined the film for me.

And I agree that it's the best trilogy ever (the original Star Wars Trilogy is my personal runner-up, although I've been told that when I finally view the Three Colours Trilogy my mind could change), and the idea that the Bourne Trilogy is better than it is laughable to me. I think GFIII is miles better than the last Bourne film, which I found insulting to the audience's intelligence and had to fight the temptation to walk out of. And there's no way any of the Bourne films come within miles of the first two Godfathers.

Posted by: Harold's Mustache at September 24, 2008 12:42 AM

Great write up, Bedhead. You've made me want to go back and watch these films. I hated being part Sicilian for the longest time because of these films.

Now I embrace it. *eating pasta and saying fungulu*

Estelle or any Americalandian who can answer this would be very much appreciated:

2) These movies have inspired too many Jersey idiots to think that being "Italian" (I use the term loosely, since none of these mouth-breathers could point to The Boot on a map, much less have they ever been to Italy) means being a fat, homophobic asshole with a god-complex. No, being Italian means dressing nicely and saying "ciao" a lot.

I'm intrigued. All Jersey idiots? Or just Jersey idiots of ethnic descent? I mean, the only thing I know about Jersey is the turnpike thing from Being John Malkovich, The Sopranos and the Bon Jovi people with big hair on an episode of Hell's Kitchen where Gordon Ramsey fucked up this New Jersey construction worker, and then the construction worker had a hissy fit and wouldn't play anymore.

Then they opened a gastropub. It was an awesome episode.

Anyway - what's with the Jersey hate?

Posted by: Gabster at September 24, 2008 1:55 AM

I always just felt like there was a movie missing between GF II & III. Too much time to make up for too much exposition. Not the worst movie ever though. Some pretty pictures. Some bad acting. To quote ESPN: "It's up! It's up! It's WIDE!!"

Posted by: Odnon at September 24, 2008 3:00 AM

Good review, Agent Bedhead. I understood the third episode in light of this line, from a far superior book than G3 was a movie:

"For nothing is evil in the beginning. Even Sauron was not so." - Elrond Halfelven, The Fellowship of the Ring

How many horrors have been started from supposedly pure motives?

Posted by: The Wanderer at September 24, 2008 6:22 AM

To sum up:

I wouldn't fuck Godfather III, not even with Pink's dick.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 24, 2008 7:42 AM

I tried watching the Godfather movies once. I fell asleep.

Tried again, same result. I reckon the only thing it's the greatest at is at putting people to sleep. I'd say that you're better off watching "eastern promises" 3 times and calling that a trilogy.

Never got the whole maffia thing.

Posted by: Naginata at September 24, 2008 8:16 AM

Since I've been a Jersey girl all my life, Gabster, I feel I should be fairly qualified to answer this question. However, I am mystified. The only thing I can think of that would make people hate Jersians so much is if they believed that every person from here was exactly like those portrayed on television and in movies, with the hair and the attitudes and the god-awful annoying voices/accents. But the thing is, most of us aren't actually like that, even the Italians among us. I mean, granted, if you saw my prom pictures from the late 80s, my hair was pretty large, but that was a direct result of the decade itself and had nothing to do with the state.

I think perhaps Estelle has only visited the Jersey shore area, which is filled with big-haired, foul-mouthed, nasty-accented, obnoxious teenagers from the Islands of Staten and Long who descend on our shoreline through the summer and make the natives not want to go there. Or maybe South Jersey, where they seem to think they're from the actual south. Possibly far northwestern Jersey, where they live in the woods and make squirrel-and-pigeon stew on a weekly basis.

Ok, well, those of us from Northeastern NJ are pretty cool. Mostly.

Posted by: Anna "Knife Pile" von Beaverplatz at September 24, 2008 9:57 AM

Godfather I was the best movie of all time. Godfather II was a top 5 movie of all time.
Godfather III was nominated for a Best Picture Academy Award. Wait, what??

It's true. How the did the Academy overlook its many flaws? I don't know, but I agree that buried within GIII was a good movie. It's easier to experience now then it was in the theater. You just fast forward through every scene with Sofia Coppola. The Immobilare story wasn't that far from the intrigue of the the first two (Don Barzini in G1, and Hyman Roth in GII). I thought the evolution of Michaels character was handled thoughtfully and believably. But that is sorta where the good stops and the bad starts.

Garcia was just barely passable as Vincent, although I never saw him as a combination of all the other Corleones, nor as big a schemer as Agent Bedhead describes. In this light perhaps he was better in the role than I have given him credit for. Still he wasn't a worthy successor to the crown and that bothered me a bit.

Joe Montegna was the worst of the mob archenenies. Not horrible, but his character doesn't hold up to the others in the first 2.

Sofia Coppola was in fact the JarJar of the movie as another commenter aptly pointed out. Her presence really does ruin the movie. I often wonder if Winona had stayed in the role if it would have made a difference. I think yes, but it wouldn't have made all the difference. The whole Mary Corleone arc was poorly conceived and very, very icky. No matter who played the role it was going to be cringe worthy, "cuz". Every father loves his daughter so we could still empathize somewhat with Michael when Mary dies, but on the flip side, we want her to die, so the impact of her death isn't what I expect Copolla intended.

I wholeheartily believe this is the best trilogy of all time, and would still be the best trilogy of all time even if you substitute GIII with "Freddy Got Fingered". That's how far GI and GII are ahead of the competition. But since I also agree with AB that there is a good movie buried in GIII and all I have to do is judiciously employ the old fast forward button to see it, it makes the choice that much more solid.

Posted by: Ed Newman at September 24, 2008 10:17 AM

I've never actually seen the complete Godfather trilogy because I watched the first one until Dianne Keaton came on-screen, realised she was the incarnate of my mother, in every movie she is in, shuddered and swapped the channel to something else. Thank the almighty Jeebus that Kindergarten Cop was on that day or I would have ended up in the fetal position reliving horrid childhood experiences

Posted by: caity at September 24, 2008 10:33 AM

I'm sorry, but I'm afraid there are only two Godfather movies. The third one was aborted by Diane Keaton near the end of the second movie.

Posted by: AnnArrogance at September 24, 2008 10:54 AM

Best trilogy = Final Destination series. Forget plot and characters, if you like contrived gory death scenes (and really, who doesn't?), then this is the show for you! And all you Vancouverjibans can point out local landmarks!

And...I too must hang my head in shame. Godfather trilogy? Never seen it.

Posted by: lordhelmet at September 24, 2008 12:17 PM

Let's not overlook the Karate Kid trilogy.

Posted by: Mattfactor at September 24, 2008 1:45 PM

Let me explain:

I grew up 30 minutes from Italy. When I moved to the State, some people (many from Jersey) referred to themselves as "Italian." They did not act, eat, think, look, walk, remotely resemble ANYONE I had ever encountered in actual Italy.

The Jersey I'm referring to is the whole stupid state (sorry, part of living in Philly means hating on Jersey; it's in the commonwealth documents). I have family who lives in Paramus (that's NE Jersey, no?). They live near some of the tackiest homes I have ever seen.

Imagine, suburbs upon suburbs upon suburbs. Some of the split-level homes sport giant lions in the front. Some have 30 foot tall statues of Venus. All very, very classy.

The only good part of Jersey is NJTransit. The buses and trains go everywhere. There's bathrooms on the trains. Plus, the web site is fantastic.

Posted by: Estelle at September 24, 2008 2:25 PM

I've never understood the hatred for Godfather III, and I've always thought it was underrated. Sofia did a competent job and certainly didn't ruin the film. I've seen enough terrible performances that glaringly stand out, and I just don't think hers qualifies.

For those who bash the film, I suggest giving it one more chance with the Coppola commentary turned on. You might appreciate some of the things he has to say about the making of the film and even gain some level of appreciation.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at September 24, 2008 2:54 PM

appreciation for the film itself, that is.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at September 24, 2008 2:56 PM

Actually, NJTransit sucks balls for those of us who live WAY northeast- my town (about 20 or so minutes from Paramus, and yet nothing like it) has a single bus line which comes through once an hour between 6 and 10 a.m. and between 4 and 8 p.m. In order to actually get anywhere, you have to take that bus to either Ridgewood or Hackensack, where you then either take another bus or a train where you actually want to go. Unless of course you wanted to go to Ridgewood or Hackensack, in which case, lucky you!

The thing about the "Italians" that live here (in NJ or the surrounding area) is that in reality, they are Americans, frequently 3rd or 4th generation, most of whom have probably in fact never been anywhere near Italy, as you originally pointed out. I don't actually count those people as Jersians. Also, Paramus is more urban-y than much of the surrounding area. There are no tacky statues outside the houses in my town (although you do often see garden reflecting globe thingies and those stupid flags with dogs or holiday motifs on them).

In conclusion, I'm not trying to get you to love NJ, but don't hate on all of us, 'cause we're not all idiots, and those of us who aren't resent being thought of in such a stereotypical fashion.

P.S. Also, I might be cranky due to my visit from Auntie Flo.

P.P.S. This: part of living in Philly means hating on Jersey; it's in the commonwealth documents -explains why I never go to Philly. It's as if I knew, somehow...

Posted by: Anna "Knife Pile" von Beaverplatz at September 24, 2008 4:06 PM

Anna,

As a native Jersian (and 1/4 Jersey Italian), now displaced, I think you need to embrace your innner Italian! To say Jersey Italians are not Jersians is just wrong on so many levels. You would deny us our native sons, DeVito, Sinatra, Travolta, and Gandolfini?? Come to the light; stay for the pizza!

Posted by: Ed Newman at September 24, 2008 4:53 PM

I've been waiting a long time to hear someone admit that Godfather III, while not nearly as good as the first two, doesn't suck that much at all. While less satisfying than the first two, it's the required third act in this gothic trajedy, and the venom about it by fans is baffling.

The complaints about Michael Corleone's transition are remarkably short-sighted. It's been 20 years of being alienated by his family - that's not supposed to infuse him with a sense of regret and need for forgivness? Also, like Vito in the first movie, he sees his own end coming and is feeling remorseful at the legacy that he leaves to those he loves.

Sohpia Coppola isn't a very good actress, granted. But even so, she didn't detract from the movie in any way that I felt. Not to sount mysoginistic, but female characters aren't particularly important as complex and involved characters in the Godfather movies. If you were that bothered by her performance, you were probably paying too much attention to her character.

And let's not dillude the nadir of movie characters by comparing Mary Corleone to Jar-Jar Binks. It's like comparing modern politicians to the Nazis - nobody's that bad!

Posted by: Craig at September 24, 2008 5:09 PM

It's the kids today, Ed Newman. Damn kids. Ruining everything for everyone, with their stupid hair and their stupid pants, and thinking that Italian = fake TV accents and gold chains. My Jersey Italian friends don't talk like that! Dammit! Also, I'm not Italian at all. I'm Dutch, Irish, English, and some kind of Slavic (some part of Austria that either didn't used to be Austria but is now, or used to be but isn't anymore). As I said in my "PS", I might be a little cranky.

I may be contractually obligated to like Bon Jovi and Springsteen, but I'm not required by law to have big hair or be whiny and annoying. I choose to do that on my own.

Posted by: Anna "Knife Pile" von Beaverplatz at September 24, 2008 5:41 PM

Michael's "silent scream" in Godfather III is one of the most hair-raising scenes of all time. For that alone the movie stands on it's own. The rest of you "connoisseurs" can blank a blank. Watch Spiderman 3 and then come back and tell me Godfather III sucks.

Posted by: gat at September 24, 2008 10:42 PM

Godfather III sucks.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 24, 2008 11:09 PM

I second the Final Destination nomination, lordhelmet.

And I cannot offer any insight into the Godfather trilogy, as I haven't seen even a second of those films. Regardless, I believe that I still receive the full effect of any and all popculture references to said films.

Posted by: popejenn at September 24, 2008 11:57 PM

Anna Knifepile VonBeaverplotz first off, I think I may have a tiny little girl crush on your name, second of all, thanks so much for the cultural exchange. The bad rep people give Jersey sort of bothers me, considering I live in the Australia counterpart and am Sicilian to boot.

Big hair in the 80's? Hell, I have it right now!

Posted by: Gabster at September 25, 2008 12:10 AM

I'm generally happy just to lurk, but I happen to be reading The Godfather for the third time right now, so the plot is pretty fresh in my head. I've seen Part I at least twice, but have only seen II and III once each.

I entirely agree that Sofia Coppola ruined that movie for me. I couldn't feel the proper grief at her death because I was cheering that I wasn't going to have to deal with that simpering smile and all of that hair swinging anymore.

I really think that her horrible performances in that film and Peggy Sue Got Married are why I just can't stand Lost in Translation. It just seems as pretentious as she does.

Posted by: Alexandra at September 25, 2008 12:51 AM

Anna,

Just remember that most out-of-staters only exposure to New Jersey is Garden State, The Sopranos, and the 6 mile stretch from the Newark airport to the Holland Tunnel. If that was your exposure to New Jersey, you'd have the same opinion of the place as they do. It's like judging Michigan on Roger and Me and Flint. It's not fair, it's not accurate, but it is what it is.

And everyone has a little Italian in them, no matter what their heritage. If you ever have to move away, you'll miss the italian delis, believe me.

Posted by: Ed Newman at September 25, 2008 8:54 AM