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November 5, 2008 |

By Dustin Rowles | Guides | November 5, 2008 |

Before we get back to business as usual here in these parts, a few words: First, thanks to all of you, especially the small but vocal minority of conservative readers, who have indulged our pop-culture site over the past few weeks as we dipped a little too heavily into politics. I’m glad this place isn’t an absolute libtard haven — it’d be a lot less interesting. And sorry about McCain. Really. He’s a good man … just not when he’s campaigning (Palin, on the other hand … ).

I don’t think I have anything particularly profound to add about the election of Barack Obama — there is little to be added to one of the greatest political moments in the history of this goddamn country. It was all but certain by 8:30 or 9 EST last night, but it didn’t put a dent in the number of goosebumps that erupted when it became official at 11 EST. Mrs. Pajiba-hyphenate, like so many of you I’m sure, began sobbing, so overjoyed was she. It was really an amazing moment, capped off by an brilliant, heartfelt acceptance speech.

But the pessimist in me jumped out immediately. That speech will be forgotten about by tomorrow, dried up like footprints on a beach sidewalk. In fact, my first thoughts were: Holy Shit! This man is going to inherit one huge goddamn mess: Two wars, an economic crisis, and a divided country. And unlike George W., who managed to fuck something up every other day of his presidency, the American public is not gonna give Obama six years before completely turning on him. Never mind the mandate. Never mind that Obama got a largest percentage of the vote for a Democrat since Lyndon B. Johnson. Forty-seven percent of the American electorate didn’t vote for Obama, and unlike in past elections, there’s a very large percentage of those voters who will never get behind him, no matter how well he may do.

It’s truly amazing … historic, really … that we’ve managed to elect the first African-American president. But as a black man, Obama is going to be held to a higher standard during his first term, his first year, and his first 100 days than any other president in the history of this country. Don’t even think about a holding your plane on a runway so you can get an expensive haircut, Mr. President-elect. Don’t think you can get away with the mistakes that Clinton and Bush made during their first months in office. There are going to be a very outspoken few who will be waiting to pounce on his first mistake. And they will be loud. And they will bare their fangs every chance they get. It’s going to be a brutal first few months, days and weeks that are going to really test this man’s mettle.

And then I thought: Thank God we didn’t elect a figurehead. A symbolic black man. A slogan in a suit. We elected Barack Motherfucking Obama, people. And as he’s been saying the whole campaign: Chill the fuck out. He’s got this.

Guides | November 5, 2008 |

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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