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Jumping the Broom Review: Sweep It Up Your A**

By Agent Bedhead | Posted Under Film Reviews | Comments (22)



jumpingbroom1.jpg

One of these days, some pompous cultural studies major type will get outraged while wondering why so many directors of movies with African-American ensemble casts are compared to Tyler Perry. Is this racist perspective beyond the awareness of film critics? Can we not help ourselves? Are the similarities between Perry imitators and the man himself anything other than race and the business-related matter of targeting the same prospective audience?

In this particular instance, Jumping the Broom joins in the dubious, Perry-honored tradition of painting black women in broad caricature with the crudest of brushes. This isn’t a Tyler Perry movie, but you’d be forgiven for assuming as much from the debut effort of director Salim Akils, who operates almost exclusively through melodramatic guises and tosses so much conflict (everything from the revelation of sensational family secrets to ridiculously physical scuffles) into the third act that the inevitably happy resolution is, to be blunt, disgusting in its saccharine sweetness. The movie’s title references the cultural tradition of slaves that didn’t have the right to marry; among other things, the act of jumping the broom is one of many things that two opposite sides of a wedding party make time to quarrel about. Unfortunately, making time to watch this film would be a complete mistake on an audience’s part.

To make matters more insufferable, Jumping the Broom is another movie that reinforces the notion that women are nothing unless they are married women. As it happens, Paula Patton (Sabrina Watson) and Jason Taylor (Laz Alonso) are about to get hitched after a whirlwind six-month courtship. They meet shortly after Paula wakes up after a one-night stand and prays to God that she’ll save her “cookies,” if only He will send her Mr. Right. Almost immediately, she hits Jason, a young Wall Street whippersnapper, with her car and (what the hell) they start dating. They’re both highly successful in their careers and happy to be in love, but since they aren’t doing it, they want to get married right away so they, uh, can totally do it.

Naturally, the weekend of the wedding has arrived, and the families haven’t met each other until now because the resultant fireworks make for a much wackier story when the wedding party meets up at Martha’s Vineyard. You see, the Watsons are uptown, and the Taylors are downtown. So technically, this is not a matter of race but class, although racial issues do arise when the Watsons admit that they once actually owned slaves. There’s also the matter of the Watson family being much lighter in skin tone than the Taylors, but whatever. At first, nobody seems to have a problem with any of this except for the bride and groom’s respective mothers, whose ill-will towards each other soon grows contagious.

And so, Angela Bassett and Loretta Devine meet once again for the first time since Waiting to Exhale as warring matriarchs on separate sides of a wedding party. This unfortunate young couple just wants to get married and fuck (they really have no idea, do they?), but Mrs. Watson (Bassett) and Mrs. Taylor (Devine) just won’t have it. Mrs. Watson is one of the New England, old-money types who selectively (and quite poorly) speaks French, and Mrs. Taylor is just your average-day, working-class, crazy-ass postal worker (seriously). These ladies are two more examples of the maligned, superficial, one-note characters that Dustin recently pointed out about mothers in film, and their perspectives couldn’t be more clearly overdone. The Taylor family hails from working-class Brooklyn and is keen to preserve the traditional values of their black ancestors, while the Watsons own a massive mansion in Martha’s Vineyard and couldn’t care less about crude traditions and believe that the young couple shouldn’t concern themselves with them either.

Inevitably, the squabbling of the two mothers spreads to the happy couple, who go through the motions of pretending to want to call everything off, but — let’s face it — it’s a fucking wedding movie, so we all know where this is going even before entering the theater. While I will concede that the film features wonderful cinematography and sharp production values, even the best eye candy matters very little in the face of a formulaic story with cheaply-drawn characters and lazy execution. The ensemble cast includes Meagan Good, DeRay Davis, Valarie Pettiford, and Mike Epps, but only Tasha Smith (a Tyler Perry veteran and the best part about the Why Did I Get Married? movies) gives us a reason to laugh, ever so slightly. As an actress, she’s definitely a keeper and would ideally continue to go far with her career; unfortunately, Smith appears to have little to no desire to move on from movies like this one and the oeuvre of Perry. Finally, Jumping the Broom includes only one white character (with a name, that is), Amy the Wedding Planner (Julie Bowen), who just happens to be a total idiot. Mister Perry should be so proud.

Agent Bedhead lives incc Tulsa, Oklahoma. She and her little black heart can be found at agentbedhead.com.









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Comments

To be fair to Tasha Smith, her lack of desire to move on to other projects probably has something to do with the fact that most other job offers she's had have probably been for sassy best friends and crack whores.

Posted by: Will at May 9, 2011 12:30 PM

+50 for Will.

This review totally confirmed my suspicions, as I usually tend to agree with most of Miss Bedhead's reviews. A group of my homegirls got together to see this, and they wanted me to come along to provide mocking commentary, but I had to leave town. I'm gonna ask her what she thought.

Posted by: Rest In Peace at May 9, 2011 1:04 PM

Agent Bedhead, “Jumping the Broom” isn’t the first movie in the history of film making to make the claim that a women needs a man in her life to give her life meaning. I can’ t tell you the number of times I’ve watched a film where the female lead just had to have a man in her life, according to her family and friends. And this is just another version of that same theme except that the cast is predominately black. So why all the histrionics and anger Agent Bedhead?

Posted by: Pookie at May 9, 2011 1:26 PM

I'm assuming that beyond the Waiting to Exhale connection that there was no reason for Lynn Whitfield to even consider trying to take this role away from Angela Bassett. The role seems like a sad deconstruction of Whitfield's much superior turn in Eve's Bayou.

Posted by: Jerry at May 9, 2011 1:36 PM

Pookie. Dude. Scathing and bitchy commentary and reviews. That's why many of us read this site. What about this review is uncharacteristic of Agent Bedhead? Where did you read that she implied that this film is an anomaly when it comes to romcoms aka Movies That Illustrate How That A Woman Ain't A Woman Without A Man?

Also, personal question, what part of the country do you live in? I see your comments and try really hard not to judge you, I want some context please. I don't like making judgements about people I don't know, but a lot of commenters make that very hard.

Posted by: Rest In Peace at May 9, 2011 1:39 PM

Rest in Peace, you might want to take it down a notch, it’s only Monday. I enjoy Agent Bedhead’s work, I always read her column, it is one of the few joys I have in life. Sometimes I may overreact to a review, and if I did in this case it is because sometimes I think certain films are judged a bit differently, depending on the director and subject matter.

If you must know I’m originally from Miami, Florida. Now I reside 10 minutes outside of Austin, Texas. My politics are middle of the road, I drive a truck, I love James Cagney movies, and “Fail Safe” is my favorite movie of all time. Gladys Knight is my favorite singer; Chinese is my favorite food to eat. I love reading books about Wall Street, Carl Icahn, Michael Milken, and other corporate raiders of the 80’s. I like rap music, mainly Public Enemy and I enjoy rock and roll, Grand funk Railroad, Rolling Stones. I’m a day dreamer and a world class procrastinator and an avid chess player, and I’m a Libra.

Posted by: Pookie at May 9, 2011 2:22 PM

Can't a movie just suck on its own terms without dragging anything else into the mix?

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at May 9, 2011 2:35 PM

Thanks Pookie. That explains A LOT.

And for the record, that's NOT me being crunk. I have yet to even go up a notch or two on this website.

And Mrs. Julien, the answer is no, simply because when something sucks really hard, everything in its immediate vicinity is dragged into its vortex of suckitude. I know this to be incontrovertible scientific fact because I finally saw the "new" Star Trek the other day (which I enjoyed immensely).

Back to this film, my friends who've now seen it really like it, but I think it's mainly because they say the buffoonery factor is zero. Which, to me, is to have abysmally low standards. Just the trailer to this film, while slightly cute, was such a turn-off with its utter predictability.

Womp.

Posted by: Rest In Peace at May 9, 2011 2:53 PM

So THAT'S what this movie is called! I kept seeing billboard ads for it rushing by while riding the CTA, and the only thing that ever stood out was the "Downtown Meets Uptown" (or vice versa) tagline. I seriously thought that was the name of this movie. Now I know better. Thank you, Ms. Bedhead!

Posted by: kiyo-chan at May 9, 2011 3:51 PM

Was I the only one who thought this movie was called "Jumping the Groom?"

No?

Posted by: BWeaves at May 9, 2011 4:35 PM

Was I the only one who thought this movie was called "Jumping the Groom?"

No?

Posted by: BWeaves at May 9, 2011 4:37 PM

Me too, kiyo-chan! I got halfway through this review and read

You see, the Watsons are uptown, and the Taylors are downtown.

and had a lightbulb moment. I just (about an hour ago) got back to Ohio from Chicago, where I have been living and going to school. I miss it a little too much.

Posted by: littlelion at May 10, 2011 1:40 AM

I wonder...is the notion that a man isn't grown up unless he settles down and gets married essentially different from the idea that a woman has to be married to have a full life?

btw...is it really a big deal that a family once owned slaves? it's not as if any of the immediate family members did.

Posted by: Sara Tonin at May 10, 2011 8:34 AM

OK, you can blame Pookie for this (it isn't his fault my brain links most things to song lyrics, but he set me off this time)
When I read his bio/info post I kept waiting for him to break into song - The pina colada song. So Pooks, do you like pina coladas and making love in the rain? Cause I always thought of you as more of a (filthy) poetry, long walks on the beach, and poking dead things with a stick kind of a guy.

Posted by: Walter at May 10, 2011 8:55 AM

OK, I'm confused. I thought Pookie was a Ms.

Enjoyed his/her little bio, though.

And I like Pina Coladas but doing it in the rain? Does that involve mud or wet grass? Will I be naked or will my disheveled clothes get drenched?
Is it a warm summer rain or a freezing cold sleet?
I like being inside and doing it while it rains but I fear actualy being in the rain because the humidity does a number on my hair. One wants to look sexy whilst doing it and not like Art Garfunkel. No, I don't think I like doing it in the rain.

Posted by: kirbyjay at May 10, 2011 9:30 AM

Mud. Georgia clay actually. Naked, of course. Warm summer rain. Don't worry about the humidity, the mud is a natural hair control product.

Posted by: Walter at May 10, 2011 11:20 AM

Just discovered that the correct lyrics are

"if you like Pina Coladas and "getting caught" in the rain"

And no, I don't like getting caught doing it anywhere, especially the rain.

Posted by: kirbyjay at May 10, 2011 11:21 AM

@kirbyjay:

Your comment amazed me so much that, (even though I knew instantly you were right) I still checked it out.
Now that I know the error of my perverse ways I don't think I'll enjoy the song as much.
Does this mean truth has a killjoy bias?

Posted by: Walter at May 10, 2011 1:41 PM

I don't know. "getting caught" is ambiguous enough that it opens up a lot of possibilities -"getting caught with the twins";"getting caught hiding the body", etc.

Posted by: Pat C. at May 10, 2011 4:15 PM


It's as it should be Walter, nobody should enjoy The Pina Colada song that much.

Posted by: kirbyjay at May 10, 2011 7:46 PM

Whenever a man has cast a longing eye on offices, a rottenness begins in his conduct. -Thomas Jefferson

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