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October 7, 2008 |

By Dustin Rowles | DVD Releases | October 7, 2008 |

The Happening: Shyamalan is so over, writes Dan: “In addition to featuring a weak plot, uninvolving characters, and a (by now typically) disappointing reason behind all the madness, Shyamalan’s film is almost completely devoid of tension and drama. Loud music cues and sudden pans aren’t enough to create suspense or horror, and after a while, they become annoying reminders that Shyamalan’s too involved in what he sees as a powerful story with a message to bother investing time in the characters and letting the audience connect with them.”

The Visitor: Dan gives a glowing review to Tom McCarthy’s follow-up to The Station Agent, and I have to agree — it’s the best small film of 2008, so far. If there’s one film that needs massive support, it’s The Visitor. Rent it. Netflix it. Buy it. Watch this film. Dan writes that The Visitor is “an engaging, expertly drawn, and moving examination of one man’s empty life and the way he comes to fill it again. The character at the center of the film is lonely, yes, and even bears some surface similarities to Fin, the hero of The Station Agent. But more than the loneliness, McCarthy’s focus is on its cause, its damages, and its cure. He doesn’t just make films about lonely people; he makes films about those people finding the hope they thought had been lost.”

You Don’t Mess with the Zohan: Guest critic Holland Oates summed up this guy’s movie for guys who like movies (or whatever) best, writing: “And let me tell you fellas, if you got a swinging dick and two spunk-spitting midgets between your legs, Zohan is the movie for you. It is a typical dumb man’s movie, and since all men are morons, all men, without exception, are going to love it. And boy is it retarted! It’s not too often I can not only turn my brain off, but also unplug the sumbitch and still understand what’s going on most of the time. And that’s the glory of Zohan. You ain’t gotta have more than 3 brain cells to enjoy it — one to buy the movie ticket, one to find your seat, and the other to scratch your Richard whenever Emmanuelle Chriqui comes on the screen. Better still, you don’t even need this review to know if you oughta see it or not. All you gotta do is ask yourself one simple question: Are you a member of the homo saypenis? If you are, then you’re guaranteed to love this movie, just like you love football, huntin’, NASCAR, and playing with yourself.”

And FYI, there were 2 straight-to-DVD offerings that I doubt we will muster the courage to review here: Feast 2: Sloppy Seconds and Joy Ride 2: Dead Ahead. As for Feast, John Gulager does return to the director’s chair (what else is he gonna do?), but none of the original cast (Jason Mewes, Balthazar Getty, superhotomgholyshit Krista Allen) have returned.

You Don't Mess with the Visitor

This Week's DVD Releases / The Pajiba Staff

DVD Releases | October 7, 2008 |

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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