You're Soooo Pretty
Okay kids, here’s the deal. I am feeling neither awesome nor funny, so I’m saying sorry in advance for how much this here column is totally gonna suck. My cat had to be put to sleep and my allergies have gone ballistic, so I’ve basically been a crying, snotty, disgusting mess lately. Like so:
Except I’m a woman, so I have a bigger dick than Dawson.
Anyway, the last week has sucked beyond the telling of it, so let’s just… not, okay? I don’t wanna talk about it anymore. I would much rather talk about idiotic tomfoolery. More specifically, yours. Please share with the class an example of something asininely stupid you’ve said or done in front of witnesses. Bonus points if it was a first impression, and super megabucks bonus [note: bonus garners no actual megabucks] if it was a first impression with future in-laws, your employer, or similar important-type person.
Winner gets to wear the “I’m a Pretty Princess” crown for the day.
Sarah Larson lives in Minnesota, where she is usually up to no good. She can be reached by email here.
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