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What Is The Most Bizarre Thing You Can Do With Your Body?

By Mrs. Julien | Comment Diversions | January 19, 2013 | Comments ()


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You know that thing you used to do with your eyelids in middle school to weird out your friends. Can you still do it? What other freaky things can you do with your person? Does it do amazing things all by itself, such as this woman who can see and taste music:

These are my extremely humble contributions to the discussion, one temporary and two permanent:

1. When a woman is pregnant, her stomach can grow so large that her belly button disappears. I never got quite that big, but I was big enough that I could pop my belly button in and out. People were either fascinated or repulsed. There was no middle ground.

2. I can wiggle my nose like a bunny. It's a fun in stores when there's a little kid ahead of me in line. I wiggle my nose, they try to wiggle their nose. Hijinks ensue. I discovered the trait was genetic when the very dignified, and really rather Edwardian, Pater Julien demonstrated this ability at the age of 75. Alas, Little Julien does not have the bunny gene. Honestly, other than his need to correct people, I'm not convinced I'm involved in his gene pool at all.

3. I can put my fist in my mouth.

You're scrolling and railing, "Pics or GTFO!", aren't you?

First of all, don't curse at me. Secondly, I don't use my real name, you do you really think I'm going to put pictures of myself on here? Lastly, I did actually take a picture. It was unseemly. I appeared to be swallowing an albino python. You can see how that would be inappropriate on Pajiba, if potentially profitable elsewhere. Or maybe you can't. The fact of the matter is I'm not going to post a photo of myself ingesting my own hand, okay?

I can put my foot in my mouth, too. Originally, this manifested itself as either a literal or a figurative skill, but with age comes limitations.

Then there's this guy:

What can you sense, bend, wiggle, rotate, undulate, or endure? What is the most bizarre thing you have seen someone else do with his/her body? Natural freakishness only, please. A thousand piercings get an A for effort, but it's not an innate ability. Bonus points for attempts with nasty repercussions, or if, just as your mother warned, it got stuck that way.



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  • Buck Forty

    I can't do anything. I am good for nothing. But I once had sex with a woman who was double jointed and could do the splits. Like, really.do.the.splits.
    It was such a unique experience I'm still telling that story 20 years later to anyone who'll listen.
    Wait, you are still listening aren't you?
    Come back, I once knew a woman who...

  • thecloofer

    I can do a kip-up and I once fit 30 grapes in my mouth on national television. Not quite winning.

  • I also can wiggle my nose like a bunny, but I seem to be the only one in my family. :)

  • competitivenonfiction

    1. I have a weak form of synaesthesia. Colour is associated with words and things, even people, but I don't see it the way some people do. Its awesome, but if someone tries to say that Wednesday is anything but yellow, I want to cut someone.

    2. I can stick my finger in my eyelid, though I have no idea how I figured it out.

  • Kballs

    Late to the party but I can do the following:

    Raise each eyebrow and move each ear individually. It makes for quite a show when I really get going.

    I can twist my left arm behind my back (think of a hold a police officer would use to subdue someone) and reach up to the base of my skull. No idea how since I've never dislocated the shoulder or anything.

    I can pop my left thumb back and forth so that it looks like it comes out of the socket.

  • TheMudshark
  • BabyBearStrikesAgain

    I have a large, flexible tongue (a la Gene Simmons but not nearly as freaky) which can touch my nose, goes down to my chin and can flip in any direction including fold in on itself. It's a horrible skill to show off without having people immediate imagine sexual situations. I also have a slight lisp because of it.

  • TheOriginalMRod

    I can flip my eyelids back and touch my nose with my tounge and my thumbs do that weird bendy back thing. Doing all that at the same time is not very attractive and mostly just plain silly.

  • ZombieMrsSmith

    I gave birth to my second child naturally, in my own bed at home, no drugs and only a midwife in attendance. This is apparently very bizarre to many people.

  • I have no skills in these ways, but I did earn a t-shirt that says, "I have gas and I know how to use it" for many feats that are now legend in Aspen and the UK.

    My dad can wiggle his ears (like a bunny?). He used to reduce us, his brood, to hysterical laughter, so good on you, Mrs. Julien for using your gifts for good.

    A former of mine seemed to have double-jointed abilities in every part of wrist, hand, fingers. She could fold her hand dead flat back against her forearm, lay her pinky flat across her palm (perpendicular), close her other fingers around it as a closed fist and wiggle the tip of her pinky sticking out the thumb end. She could bend her four fingers flat against her palm. It's like she could dislocate them, such were her tendons and ligaments. It was truly "how is that possible?"

  • Fabius_Maximus

    I can wiggle my ears, which I inherited from my father, who does it unconsciously whenever he gets angry. Used to terrify me as a child, because he didn't wiggle them as such, only pulled the skin on his head back, which stretched it over his face a bit more.

  • Uriah_Creep

    I can sense minute imbalances in The Force. Something to do with midi-chlorians, I guess.

  • TheGreatUnstainer

    I can turn delicious food into poo.

    Plus, I have no sense of smell. Complementary skill set!

  • Idle Primate

    my body has the ability to process superhuman quantities of alcohol without expiring. does that count?

    all these people with their freaky joints. i have the power to dislocate a joint and make minimal noise during agony, nowhere near as fun or impressive.

  • Idle Primate

    in my early twenties, during a dreadfully cabin fevery winter, boredom and insanity led my room mates and I to discover that we could all indeed cram our fists into our mouths. this discovery was overshadowed by the discovery that it took a lot more work to get it back out again.

  • BendinIntheWind

    I can move my right eye independently of the left. Not sure if that's unique, but it did allow me to thoroughly freak our a very stoned friend in college.

  • Mitchell Hundred

    I can't really do anything remarkable with my body. There is, however, something that I can't do which is apparently supposed to be super easy for everyone else. I have never been able to snap my fingers. All I've ever gotten is a weird swishing sound when I rub them together.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Yeah, me too. I can get close when I hook my thumb behind my ring finger first, though.

  • Idle Primate

    i'm a swisher too. i find snapping mystifying

  • Tinkerville

    I can wiggle my nose too! Perhaps we're distant cousins. I can also wiggle my ears and I can blush a bright red on command (without holding my breath or anything like that). Apparently I was a Disney cartoon character in my past life.

  • ZombieNurse

    I have a sort of synaesthesia, nothing as wild as the lady in the video, but things that I taste, hear and smell have colors. I don't actually physically see the colors in front of my eyes, but they are in my brain and they are very clear. I can also feel sounds, which makes saying some words unpleasant for me. I hate hearing my name because of the way it pokes at me. Also as a part of that have what I think is called visuo-spatial synaesthesia, because I experience time in a very specific and external way. I can't explain it very well, but I know what it feels like.

    I can also wiggle my nose, cross only one eye, and I have the ability to mimic almost any accent, which I don't always mean to do.

  • MissAmynae

    I can pop both hips and shoulders in and out of place at will, but I shouldn't. I also have freaky dexterous toes. I can cross them, pick up pennies and dimes with them, and (this one is super-fun) manipulate a knife and fork well enough to actually eat with my toes.

  • Genevieve Burgess

    I've always been able to pop my sternum. Like, if I've been leaning over a computer or desk for a long time and stretch backwards and my arms out my sternum just goes "POP" like most people's knees or knuckles. I know a few others who can do it too, people who can't look at me like I'm about to explode in front of them.

    Other standard things: can also fit my fist in my mouth, can pull my foot up to my head like a phone, hold my hands behind my back right over the shoulder and left over the shoulder, roll my tongue, etc. But the sternum thing really freaks out the unsuspecting.

  • Bert_McGurt

    YES! I started doing that when I was in my teens and people give you the weirdest looks. Many of them look physically disgusted, actually. I also used to be able to crack pretty much my entire spine by twisting while seated. I'm trying not to do that anymore because I think it was exacerbating my back problems. But like BendintheWind says, it feels fantastic to pop the ol' sternum.

    I'm also somewhat colourblind (I think it's called deuteranomaly, or green-deficient) but I have excellent night vision, which I understand may be related. And I have a fairly heightened sense of smell compared to most others I know.

  • BendinIntheWind

    The sternum pop is the most weirdly gratifying feeling. It sort of hurts for a fraction of a second, but after you just want to do it again.

  • BRANDOR!

    Yeah my sternum pops, too! I can only do it once or twice a day. It's a pretty awesome CRACK sound.

  • Sara B.

    I have a few things. I have a true hitchhiker thumb in that it bends at a 90 degree angle. I have loose ligaments in both my arms so if I place my palms on the table and don't move them I can move my arms to gross people out. I also associate colors with numbers thought it was just me until I found someone else who does it too.

  • googergieger

    Penis Origami.

  • smart ass

    ...so much better than penis kirigami... (which is what my brain thought, because reading comprehension is not a strength of mine)

  • meaux

    I definitely can't top anybody's feats here, but my fingers will bend backwards at a 90 degree angle or so from the palm. I didn't know that was the slightest bit unusual until I caught a door for someone coming behind me, who gasped, "Doesn't that hurt?"

  • ooh, ooh, me next!

    I can cross my right pinky toe over the 4th toe w/o using my hands. I have to use my hand to do the left side, but once there, it will stay up for a long time.

    I can also wiggle my ears. I can do both at once, or just the right one, but not the left by itself.

    Also, and this is kinda gross, while pregnant with my 3rd giant baby (all 3 were healthy, 10+ lbs and 2ft long), i developed stretch marks that then developed their own stretch marks (they 'sploded), leaving my lower abdomen looking like seersucker.
    then, after a couple of years, the seersucker skin grew these weird, baby-fine hairs that I could pluck out using my hands (no tweezers) and it didn't hurt at all. My husband hated this, 'cause every time I noticed one, it turned into a mandatory show-and-tell.

    Also, don't know if it counts, but I'm on a roll now, during labor with the 3rd one, I clenched my teeth so hard that they shifted up on one side. My teeth were once even straight across, but now the right side is a visibly higher.

  • mswas

    I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never ever let you forget you're a man.

  • Ok, I just wrote a long response about the screwed up things my joints will let me do, and Disqus swallowed it whole. I'm not retyping all that shit.

  • mswas

    Looks like Disqus went into contortions and kept it.

  • There always seems to be about a 75% chance any of my comments will show up. There was one from two days ago that never did show.

    It does seem that if I post to complain about it, it'll show up. I'm sure that's confirmation bias, not fact, but still.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I always copied my comments before posting them in the old system just in case.

  • My body is not put together properly. As a result, I can do all sorts of weird things. Early-onset osteoarthritis (I'm 30 and I've had signs of arthritis for the better part of a decade) and some sort of autoimmune erosion on my joints have ruined most of my party tricks (I used to be able to bend over backwards and put my head between my knees, or hook my knees over my shoulders and walk on my hands. I'm down to being able to bend forward and place my palms flat on the ground between my feet without bending my knees). However, things I can still do include:

    Twisting my thumb inward toward my hand and curling it over to rest the top joint beneath my index finger on the back of my hand. I can also bend it so far backwards I can touch my arm with my thumbnail. And I can bend the second joint of my thumb back 90 degrees and lock it in that position.

    Twisting each finger from the pinky to the index finger toward the next and hook each finger underneath the second joint of the one next to it. It's...kind of hard to describe. People tend to cringe and tell me to stop it when I demonstrate.

    Bend all three joints in each finger backwards by greater than 90 degrees. Also, I can place my hand flat on a table and lift the tips of my fingers more than 5 inches off the table without lifting my palm or touching any part of my hand.

    Dislocate almost all the joints in my body at will and without pain. I can even pull my fingers out of joint far enough for the skin to kind of sink in, so you can distinctly see how much distance there is between the bones. If I'm standing too long, my hips will sometimes roll out of joint, I've dislocated my shoulders while sleeping, and while walking I occasionally roll one ankle so far it pops out of joint. My kneecaps also don't stay in place.

    I can also pop lots and lots of joints. Ten in each hand, in addition to several places in my wrists, my elbows, my shoulders, my knees, my ankles, all of my toes, etc. Sometimes extremely loudly--I was in an auditorium class with some 300 people and cracked a knuckle so loudly that the professor stopped in the middle of his lecture to exclaim on my behalf, "Ow!"

    I can also stick my tongue out upside down, or roll it into one or three loops at a time.

  • Guest

    Colour me impressed. That's a whole CATALOGUE.

  • Guest

    Colour-letter synaesthete, here. I can also always tell another CLS-er just by reading their prose/fiction. Obvs.

  • competitivenonfiction

    Me too! I get disproportionately excited when I meet another CLS-er.

  • Mrs. Julien

    That is amazing to me. Are any words 'ugly' for you? Are there words you avoid saying?

  • Guest

    When I was younger. For some reason, not now.

  • em.me

    I can also wiggle my nose like a bunny, although I've never used it for entertainment purposes.

  • ashlec

    I can lick my own elbow, which is allegedly impossible. I think I just have freakishly short arms.

  • BabyBearStrikesAgain

    My sister can do that too, we were playing Cranium or some similar game and she proved the game wrong.

  • Muhnah_Muhnah

    I can bend the first phalanges of my fingers, which seems to freak people out. I also have freakishly good hearing, which is more of a curse really, because I'm always being bothered by noises other people can't hear unless I'm around children. Or dogs. Which is the only way I can prove to others that I'm not making shit up.

  • whirligig7

    I can get my legs into lotus position (with each foot on top the opposite knee, facing up) without using my hands to assist. Just fling 'em up there.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I have just learned that Mr. J can wiggle his nose like a bunny, too. We are SOULMATES!

  • Mitchell Hundred

    And your child does not? You should do some kind of blood test to confirm that he is not a robot or something.

  • foolsage

    Double jointed toes; I got 'em. I can make a pretty loud clicking/thumping noise (especially on wooden floors) while doing whatever, though it's harder to do while walking. It's a random way to mess with people's heads. "No, I don't hear anything. What noise?"

    I can also pop my thumbs out of joint to make my hands look like baboon hands or do the pool cue thing PDamian wrote about.

  • Jadashay

    I can make my eyeballs vibrate. Also I can bend my thumb and hook it behind the back of my hand. Sort of hard to describe but no one I know besides my dad can do it to and get the thumb to point straight across like mine.

  • I can do that, too. Both of them, actually. People tend to get extremely freaked out by the thumb thing.

  • Jadashay

    We call it alien hand.

  • aroorda

    As a 6'3, 280 pound male I can get my foot all the way behind my head. My girlfriend didn't believe me when we first started dating until I showed her and even then she had no clue how I did it. I stretched a lot when I was growing up and playing sports, so I've retained a lot of the flexibility.

    Sex is pretty bizarre too when you think about it. Someone picks their nose and asks you to eat it, you're not very likely to do it. But when a girl asks you to eat her out it's an all you can eat buffet. As I have said to Ms. aroorda in the past, "but I LIKE that mucus!"

  • That's flexibility for a large man, but the rest might have been an overshare?

  • You're a little bit of a hero of mine now.

  • Wōđanaz Óðinn

    *swoon*?

  • John G.

    I'm very fat, so I can live on no food for over a year with my body. Suck it, zombies!

  • Sometimes, if it's a particularly fortuitous night, once in a blue moon, I can stay sober.

  • L.O.V.E.

    I got a wife, a child, a dog and a mortgage. Sometimes, if its a particularly fortuitous night, I can stay drunk.

  • aroorda

    But why would you?

  • TheOriginalMRod

    Exactly!

  • PDamian

    I have double-jointed thumbs. I never thought much of it until someone taught me how to play pool, and the double joint came in handy when holding a pool cue. It didn't make my aim any better, but freaked the hell out of my opponents, which made their aim a little worse.

    This video isn't me, but is a good illustration of what I can do:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

  • Rocabarra

    Wow that video about synethesia is incredible. I think I have a very, very mild version of it in that I can see music, particularly classical music. It's usually in bars or ribbons (like in the video) but colour isn't involved. Perhaps related, I also have a really damn good memory, better than anyone else I know.
    Physically speaking, my family seems genetically disposed to being astoundingly good hand-farters.

  • Guest

    1 in 25, so there's a good chance you are. It runs in my family--mother, brother, me (numbers for mom, letters for me, music for bro). I was so happy to learn there's a term for it--that I'm not a freak--a few years back. Synaesthetes unite.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Could you wrtie more about how it works for you?

  • Guest

    I see all letters in colours, and they have specific colours (e.g. M is always deep red, I is always pale yellow, W is always dark blue, just like that book title on synaesthesia). This means all words have colours gradations and shades. It makes it MUCH easier to recall spelling of words, and also provides people like me with an aptitude for creative language--like a sort of internal music. Rhythm of words is second nature, so is architecture. The problem is, non-syns don't always feel the poetry, while other syns LOVE writing written by syns because we "hear" and "see" words on another level. What might look complex to non-syns has utter poetic logic to syns. It's a double-edged sword, of course. Letters syns also tend to have a very early and native aptitude for reading/writing. Montessori effect, is all.

    My mom has that for numbers--and she happens to be great in math, mensa-level IQ for left-brain, and a computer programmer.

    Anyway, it's really cool and makes up for my face blindness--the other weird-wired brain thing I have that is all detriment, no bonus.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Thank you, that was really eloquent and fascinating.

  • Guest

    Aw, thanks, Mrs. J.

  • emperorcupcake

    I have dermatographia, which means that I can lightly write on my skin with something pointy, like a toothpick, and a few minutes later I have raised welts in fun patterns. Too bad it itches like a bastard.

    (Not me, just for reference: http://www.neatorama.com/2008/...

  • Idle Primate

    ditto

  • Lainie Murrell

    Before I got braces (which I got as an adult) I could flip my lower lip down and just show my top two front teeth. Then I'd lift just one eyebrow and cross my eyes. Friends referred to it as the "Deranged Bunny" face. I did the Deranged Bunny for a one-act play in high school. Alas the skill is gone now that my teeth are straight and I have no overbite. I believe there may be picture evidence on Facebook and perhaps I'll post it again.

  • marigi

    I can pop my left shoulder in and out of its socket at will, and no pain! I guess if I ever get tied up, it might be useful.

  • Jezzer
  • Fabius_Maximus

    The hell is that?

  • Jezzer

    It's a scene from an early 90s horror flick, "Society." It's about a Beverly Hills teen who discovers that A) His parents and all their friends and acquaintances are shapeshifting monsters; B) The rich literally devour the poor; and C) He was adopted, and his parents haven't been spoiling him so much as they've been preparing him for a role as veal.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Looks like Escher did some plastic surgery there.

  • Mrs. Julien

    You're taller than I expected.

  • Mrcreosote

    I can shoot M&Ms (or their generic equivalent) out of my ear. It got me an invitation to the Letterman show for stupid human tricks when I was in college. The other guy in the act who caught the M&Ms in his mouth was replaced by a dog. I am in no way kidding.

  • Idle Primate

    i prayed you were kidding

  • Natallica

    Is the ability of making the Vulcan salute bizarre? I suck at doing weird stuff with my body, my only ability seems to be able to bend the first phalanx of mi index finger. My brother is more succesful: he can twirl his tongue vertically from side to side and also cross his pinky toe over his 4th toe.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Speaking of tongues, I almost included a gif of Gene Simmons doing things with his tongue, but it seemed cruel to post it.

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