Pajiba

Cinematic: How, in mainstream rom-coms or family movies, the music cues give away the "important" moments like i've been watching a 90min "Full House" episode.

Internet: As the "Grey's Anatomy" recap exemplifies, the total lack of basic grammar and spelling on some webpages.

Other: I cannot stand it when drivers leave their turn signals on for too long or don't use them at all. Flick on the wrist, people. Flick of the wrist.

Really, all my pet peeves circle around people acting like morons.

Cinematic - The pairing of young attractive sctresses with actors who are either podgy, creepy or old enough to be their father. It makes me feel ill. And bitter.

Internet - The imdb boards where morons seem to gather primarily to ask about someone's sexuality or ethnicity. Like it matters.

Other - A lack of civility amongst the general public. Good manners cost nothing!

Cinematic: When two characters are on the phone in a modern-day movie, one hangs up and the other gets a dial tone. Phones just don't do that anymore. Worst offense: I saw a character get a dial tone on a cell phone in a movie once. I'm going to need another commenter to remember which movie. That is way too far to go for a dramatic "I've been hung up on!" moment.

I'm so worked up now, I'm going to need a minute to recompose my thoughts on Internet and other.

Movies: ENDLESS CGI fight sequences. I get it, you're fighting for the ONE. RING. Can we have some plot now? (My husband dies a little inside when I say this - he's a diehard Tolkien-er)

Internet: Trolls. Mommy didn't love you enough? Calculus girl wouldn't go out with you in the 10th grade? Now you can get on the internet and feel self-righteous ALL DAY LONG! Now, do you feel validated?

Please go away and let the rest of us come here to discuss movies and obscure pop-culture references in peace.

Other: Gum. I know, it's weird, but seriously, gum gives me the heebies, gum-chewing-noises give me the jeebies, and gum on my chair gives me a full-on case of the homicidals.

Thanks, Ranylt!!I rather love you and your writing style.

Cinematic - People who are clearly not teenagers playing teenagers. I know it's been done forever, and it may very well be harmless, but it kills me that the Sherminator is still playing a kid in direct-to-DVD releases when he's gotta be, what, almost 40 now?

Internet - Extensive website revamping that only makes a site more complicated and convoluted.

Other - Men spitting on sidewalks. It grosses me out to no end. I have never seen a woman do this; why do men need to? Ick.

Oh, and Ranylt - I am with you on the bookstore, my friend! I am an Ottawa U alumna myself and I haaaaated that shit.

Ranylt! I'm so glad you're running this afternoon comment diversion. It's nice to see a Canadian voice on this site. Go Sens! Ha, just kidding, Oilers all the way.

Movie: Cheesmo romantic clichés eg: kissing in the rain, the jump hug and kiss, the slow and intense 30 second sex scene (who f*cks like that, really?!), so basically, The Notebook.

Internet: NSFW advertisements. No one cares if I surf the web whilst at work, they do care though, if there's a pair of naked sweater bunnies staring back at them as they walk by my cubby.

General: Draw: body odor in enclosed spaces, like a bus or a pedway, please stay out of my line of scent if you smell like booze, cigarettes, mouthwash, stale urine, Axe, or a combination of any or all of these things. Also, people who won't move their fat ass over to the window seat on the packed city bus. You're not important (you're riding a city bus afterall), move your ass to the inside, you don't deserve two seats. This one is doubly offensive if you're doing this whilst sitting in the priorty seating section, ya know the one for cripples, old ladies, the blind, which you're clearly not, asshole.

Cinematic - Torture porn. I just can't stand that gory shit.

Internet - those huge ads that show up blocking the entire webpage. You have to wait for the damn thing to load before you can hit the skip ad/close ad button (which is always, curiously enough, the last part of the fucking ad to load)

Other - rude and incompetent retail/sales clerks. You're getting paid to be nice to me you sons of bitches. I worked in retail, it's not that hard to plaster a fake smile on your face and pretend to be polite.

Cinematic : Anything by, involving, directly or indirectly related to Tyler Perry.

Internet: Perez Hilton, broken links, poor quality movie trailers, and the lack of side-boob on Pajiba.

Other: People that stand in front of your desk, ask you "What's the most powerful weapon in the world?" and when you stare them blankly in the face while you wonder "well, dipshit, that could be taken so many ways. And although I'd like to stare you dead in the eye and say 'whatever removes you from my presence', it's painfully obvious to me that you have an agenda so I'm going to look at you like a retarded, vagrant child asking for change so you can respond to your own question with "love" and then proceed to ask me for my email so you can email me your "inspirational quotes". Fuck all.

Cinematic: Film critic endorsements for films from the first few months declaring it "the best romantic comedy of the year!" or "the best time you'll have at the movies all year!" How do they know this?!

Internet: When you can't hit the back button and go past a certain page. It just keeps reloading the front page of whatever. But if you hit the back button really fast a couple times, you can trick it out. What the hell is that shit?

Other: People who have iPods in constantly at a volume that is too loud for them to pay attention to what's around them. I'm just as guilty of constant iPod usage as anyone else, but mine's at a manageable volume where I can hear, for instance, if a car is about to hit me.

Cinematic: artsy films. You know what I mean, the "I'm just gonna make some weird shit and then pretend you're an idiot because you don't appreciate my quirky non-sensical whimsical vision"-fuckwittery.

Internet: Facebook applications. I'll kill the next person who sends me an invite to become a vampire or whatever the fuck.

Other: Oh ho ho...well...don't want to go there, it's an endless list. In fact, it would be easier to have a list of things that DON'T irritate me. At the moment...whoever wrote my UMTS security book. Asshole couldn't bother with proper diagrams.

Cinematic: Bad dialogue. It seems to occur more in TV than the movies, but I can't stand it. Writers: You don't need to repeat names in every line of dialogue. And you don't need to reference the (for example) impending explosion over and over again (you hear me Heroes?). I'm watching, I know what's happening from the first time you told me, STOP Repeating it!

Internet: Those full screen ads that pop up when you click on a link. Do you know the ones I'm talking about WIMB? The ones where you have to wait a few seconds before you can hit Skip Ad. I fucking hate those.

Other: Bad drivers. Or really, Sunday drivers (slow drivers who back up traffic all by themselves). I'm in LA and we're just trying to get somewhere in this hellish traffic. If there's more than 3 car lengths ahead of you, and you notice that you are holding up all the traffic behind you, speed up or get the fuck out of the way.

Filmic: unironic reaction shots of audiences either listening to speeches and getting verklempt, laughing and nodding along to a comedy routine [this may be the very worst], crying and smiling and whatnot during an inspirational music performance, etc. IT NEVER WORKS! Let us be the audience, we'll do the work for you, I promise.

Internet: responding to something someone posted on the internet and having that person tell me I'm stupid for responding to something someone posted on the internet. I feel like it's the comment board equivalent of a murder/suicide.

Other: smug moralizing about health issues, especially as directed toward overweight people, pregnant ladies, and cancer patients. Blecch.

Cinematic: RomComs (PS I love you looks insufferable even with the beautiful Gerard Butler)

Internets: Ads that explode 1/2 way down the screen with teeny, weeny little close buttons. Extra bonus points for those kind of ads that expand on cursor over. Rot in hell, bitches.

Other: Tech Gadget Rudeness. I.e., blackberry users (and this happened to me just yesterday) who whip out their devices & jerk off in the middle of a conversation. PhDs - I'M LOOKING AT YOU! Same goes for using the cell phone while in the checkout line, or in the movie theater or fucking up traffic.

Cinematic: When characters wake up in the morning next to each other and start kissing right away. All I can think about is the morning breath.

Internet: Forwards. I hate email because of forwards.

Other: When I sit in a hard plastic chair and it's still warm from the ass-heat of the stranger who sat there before me. Sick.

Cinematic: Movies like The Notebook - ones that are made to punch you in the heart and make you cry, but otherwise serve no actual purpose.

Internet: Online research journals that are unavailable to me. You have the article I need, why won't you let me access it?

Other: Big university undergraduates and the graduate students who act like them.

Cinematic: Hollywood casting American actors with god-awful British accents. Yes I'm looking right at you Zellweger and Hathaway!

Internet: Kitty pidgin

Other: loud chewing...especially when eating bananas

Also, when I accidentally post the same shit seventy times because my computer is an idiot.

Cinematic: Perfect people who don't have any conflicts in their lives and live happily.

Internet: People who pay $10.00 a month just to look at badly photo shopped porn. Just sickens me.

Other: Republicans. Not all of them, just most.

Internet: Reviews written entirely in LOLcat.

Cinematic: The unrealistic expectations Hollywood places on women. Maybe I'm too sensitive but after 26 years of seeing tall, thin actresses my short, chubby self feels acutely inadequate. Especially since the same aesthetic "values" are not equally placed on men. See: Seth Rogan

Internet: I'm a librarian and the OPAC (online public access catalog) my library uses does not save the terms you enter into the search boxes. This means every goddamn time you try to tweak your search to get better results, you have to re-enter EVERY term. It makes my eye twitch every day.

Other: One-uppers. Those people who try to one-up any story or statement you make. What really gets me about these individuals is it brings out my own one-upping tendencies. GOOD GOD, the self-loathing! ;-)

Cinematic: "teaser" trailers. Jesus, either show us some goddamn movie scenes, or don't go through all the bullshit to show us a blank screen for 2 minutes!

Internet: Pornography that forces you to go through thousands of pop-ups jsut so you can enjoy a little bestiality here and there.

Other: Ron Paul flyers everywhere. Alright! I get it already! He's the 2nd coming of the messiah when it comes to stoners and liberal douchebags! Enough already!!!

Cinematic: When every second-to-last line of every scene is random and dumb, and exists solely for the porpose of setting up a spectacularly clicheed punchline/comeback.

Internet: Blatanntly uneducated trolls.

Other: Flaky people who name-drop, make plans they don't intend to keep, and eschew originality when trying to coax me into bed seven minutes after I've met them (the last was gor guys only- I don't mind the girls so much.) I won't be living in Los Angeles too much longer.

Cinematic: The general aplausse mostly in ROMCOMS after the boy goes to the airport or wathever and gets the girl then everybody around them star clapping, its just stupid and NOT realistic (when does that EVER happens).

Internet: The foward with the send to X people caution or you'll die or something, i F.. hate that shit. Also long Emails of god or frienship or happiness.

Other: White socks with dress pants and shoes and slow drivers.

Cinematic: Forced intimacy between characters. You know what? Sometimes you DON'T have to kiss the hero.

Internet: people who bandy about the terms "misogynist" or "racist" as an defense. You know, just because I don't happen to agree with your point of view, or because the characters in a shitty movie that doesn't appeal to me are black or check other box, doesn't mean I didn't want you to have the vote.

Other: Chicks and black people. Just kidding. Cell phones in public. If someone calls you, walk away. Excuse yourself and go into a corner and do your business. I don't care what you have to say. Nobody does, Johnny Technology. Shut the fuck up. And double for speaking in a foreign language on the phone. I understand you are calling someone in Krezblakhastan. But your voice doesn't have to carry there.

Other Other: When the Pajiba server posts something twice and makes you look like a dumbass. I didn't press the button twice, I swear!!

So with you, MV. Fixed. --RR

Cinematic: Really contrived character quirks, usually found in romantic-comedies. Like in Alex & Emma, Emma can't stand tomato skins(???) or in The Holiday where Cameron Diaz's character can't cry. These were bad movies to begin with, but the stupid quirks just tops it off.

Internet: Fan fiction. The internet just made it easily accessible.

Other: Needy people who say crap like "no one loves me" or "I look awful" all the time.

Oh. And Ranylt, you one funny lady.

I gotta second Genevieve on the Cinematic, but up the ante:
Cinematic: Nicolas Cage(his voice, his face, his presence in general) Who said this guy gets to be a "real" actor and Tom Jane gets stuck with shitty Steven King remakes?

Internets:
Too much Flash: it makes my cheesy Dell processor forget how to work the Firefox.

Other: People who act like their "industry" keeps the American Economy stable. Yes, your boutique stamp emporium is the only reason we haven't experienced economic depression and runaway inflaction.

Cinematic: Expository dialog, period. "But Martha, since you're a struggling single mother with hepatitis, should you really take a chance on love?" ::headdesk::

Internet: Considerably-older-than-college-student-aged people (and I count myself squarely in that population) diving headlong into MySpace/Facebook ... it's just skeevy. Have a little dignity.

Other: Crappy customer service when no mitigating factors are in place (obviously, I can understand a harried clerk on Black Friday, etc.). In particular, being treated snidely by clerks at electronics / gadget / game shops because I'm not in their target demographic (I just shop for people who are, dammit). If you loathe the entire human race, there are plenty of other jobs that don't involve as much contact with it. Get one.

Cinematic: Mentioned above - previews that show the whole movie. The way things are advertised these days, I see the same preview over and over, and so I REMEMBER it. And then I'm wondering when the scene is going to happen, and it turns out it's the final scene. Pisses me right off.

Internet: I'll also second the red-x in the corner for poorly-loaded pictures.

Other: The fact that NO ONE uses the term "begs the question" properly. No, it does not mean "leads to the question" or "makes you wonder". It's a very specific term related to the field of logic. Please stop using it, because frankly, unless we're debating logic, it is IRRELEVANT. I'm talking to you, writers, newscasters, and everyday people.

To Ben, with the "won't go back, reloads same page" problem...

I go up to the green arrow, top of the screen "Back," where next to it is that little arrow that shows the list of everywhere you've been before. Then I just go two places down, instead of one.

I don't think I explained that well.

Cinematic: When the audience is exposed to all the credits at the beginning of the movie. Sitting through all the commercials and previews is already so dull; don't make me sit through all the credits too! If I'm interested, I'll watch them at the end.

Internet: Commenter's who sugar coat their answers and think you are being rude/mean if you don't do the same with yours.

Other: Oh boy, I have so many:
1. People who chew with their mouth open.
2. Bad drivers (People who speed up only to catch up to me and then sit right beside me, or in my blind spot. People who don't use their turning signals. And people who ghetto out their cars, especially BMWs or Audis- they need to be shot).
3. People who cannot/ will not expand their vocabulary and use the same phrases ALL THE TIME.
4. People who shuffle their feet when they walk.
5. People who answer their cell phones calls once a quarter. Why do you have one if you're not going to use it? Shmuck!

Cinematic: Brett Ratner.
Internet: 6-replicate forwarded emails that no one bothers to remove the >>>>>> and become 8 miles long, or Perez Hilton.
Other: Maybe this isn't my worst pet peeve, but it is flagrant right now: Christmas music, especially aggravated by the fact my mom starts playing it in October. Aaaaaaargh!

cinematic: 20 minutes of commercials before my movie. Isn't that what I'm paying 10 bucks for is to have commercial free viewing?

internet: commercials that pop up while I am surfing. (hmm...do we see a trend?)

other: talking/dancing/whatever animals in commercials. It's really just one of 10,000 pet peeves, but the only one that comes to mind just now.

To that bees chick:

About the "won't go back, reloads same page" problem.

You did explain that well. My problem is that with a Mac, I tend to be pretty shortcut/keyboard-centered, so when I can't apple-left arrow my way out of a webpage, it's a frustration.

Cinematic: When a preggo character's water breaks and there is no physical evidence of it having done so. I've never actually birthed a child but I did pay attention in health class, have watched enough TLC and listened to enough moms to know that it ain't pretty.

Internet: Passive agressive emails, especially the ones that contain the sentence, "Can you point me in the right direction?" You darn well know I have the information you need, just ask me what you need to know!

Other: 1. People who don't know the lyrics to songs but insist they are singing the correct words. (My brother thought for the longest time that Hot Fun in the Summertime was Hot Fudge in the Summertime and Down in the Boondocks was Down with my Boombox).
2. People reading the magazines I've purchased before I do.
3. When people are talking about their parents and they say, "Mom did this..." or "Dad did that...". They are your parents not mine, please say, "My mom..." or "My dad...".

Cinematic: I hate it when someone is about to be hit by a car, and they go back and forth from a close up of the person about to be hit, to the car, to the person, to the car, etc. etc, so that it seems that the person should have had enough time to jump out of the way, instead of just standing in the way looking horrified. Obviously I'm not the only one who thinks this is irritating, because they spoofed it in Austin Powers.

Internet: I hate it that my dad is always sending me stupid chain letters full of urban legends, like "11 year old girl shoots intruder in mid-western home." If it took me 2 minutes to debunk it on Snopes.com (and then send that link to you) than you should be able to look it up for yourself before sending it to 20 people!

Other: I also hate snippy customer service agents, being that I am an extremely patient one myself. But, along the same lines, I really have to suppress the eye-roll urge when I get really stupid questions, like, "How do I use this product?" And then I turn the bottle over and read them the directions. Duh!

Cinematic: Sassy overweight black women. They are usually waitresses, sales clerks, nurses, receptionists, or bus drivers.

Internet: Sites with sound that plays automatically. It's just plain rude and inconsiderate to embed your site with music, especially if it requires me to install Windows Media Player first!

Other: Cell phones that play music instead of ringing, outgoing messages with music in the background, and freaking ringtones. "Crank 'dat" your favorite song, huh? I just lost all respect for you as a person.

Cinematic: David Lynch. Don't like his stuff--don't like being made to feel stupid by not liking his stuff.

Internet: This new "smart text" garbage where every other word in a blog is linked and when I mistakenly roll my mouse over it, a damn Windows Live search window pops up.

Other: People who tell the same stories and make the same jokes to you over and over because they're too burnt to remember. If I am feeding you the punchline before you even finish the set-up, perhaps you've told this gem before, yeah?

Similarly, people who you've met dozens of times, but still introduce themselves every time you see them. I don't claim to be an especially memorable guy, but if you are showing up at my house for a party, for possibly the 4th time in a month, don't introduce yourself to me like we've never met. I know who you are and I don't like you. Go away.

Maybe I know too many stoners.

Cinematic: I have to second (or third) the kissing as soon as they wake up in the morning. I can't stand my own morning breath, much less someone else's. I also hate how much make up people seem to wear when they go to bed. Most everyone I know takes it all of before sleep.

Internet: Search boxes where I have to move the cursor to press the button instead of simply pressing enter.

Other: The dumbing-down of the English language. There are some words I use that seem pretty basic to me, but so many others don't know what they mean.
This goes along with it, but the complete lack of appreciation people seem to have for the subtlety of language. Many words have similar, but not identical meanings! I'm not being pretentious, I'm using the word with the meaning I want. Sorry if that confuses you!

Cinematic: Old TV show turned into movies. Hey, guess what? Most old TV shows weren't even that great to begin with and if I wanted to relive my memories of a TV show I'll watch it in reruns or on DVD. I'm tired of lame ass shows being turned into cinematic dreck. Write something new and original, bitches!

Internet: I have to go with all those who listed those damn pop-up ads that swallow half the screen, strobe light flash, have small close buttons, sound, etc. And also trolls - you know who you are - even though it gave way to a favorite phrase of mine, "Don't feed the trolls". Way to ruin my internet experience, bitches!

Other: Repetitive noise. Tapping fingers/pencil, popping gum, humming or singing the same lyric over and over again, etc. Stop it or die, bitches!

Yeah, everyone is a bitch today, bitches! Except you, Ranylt, I like you and your writing.

Time-travel plot device.
The instant it's used your story makes less sense than Blair Witch 2. It's a literary license to make no sense at all.
This started for me when a Star Trek character lamented "I hate temporal mechanics." I instantly realized I did too! And Star Trek plots are filled overflowing with it. Began then my hate for star trek.
This peeve of mine includes future prediction.

other: nasty colds that leave you feeling too crappy to post on comment diversions.

Cinematic: I know that a character from a particular country need not be exclusively portrayed by an actor of that same provenance, but it does annoy me when, for instance, Brazilians are played onscreen by a Spanish-speaking actor merely using his/her native accent (Penelope Cruz's 'Woman on Top' springs to mind here).

Internet: The death of correct spelling and grammar. Antagonistic, intolerant comments.

Other: As brilliantly summed up by another commenter early on, most of my gripes involve people acting like asshats (new favourite word, thanks, Pajiba) in one scenario or another.

Cinematic: Why is that in an action movie, the hero can shoot dozens of bad guys in a matter of seconds, but when he's finally trapped, the bad guy makes some cute remark, then slowwwwwwly starts to raise the gun, then slowwwwwly points it at him, which leaves just enough time for him to be saved/grab the gun/etc. If I was a bad guy, I'd shoot him and get it over with. Boom. The end. That never happens.

Internet: Yahoo! Answers and the people who ask ridiculous, poorly spelled and punctuated questions. "I took a home pergnancy test and it sed i wuz pregnat. Am I pregnat? lolz."

General: Like someone said above me, it would take less time to list what doesn't bug me. I hate everybody and everything. But at the moment I'm hating on people who name their kids STUPID things. Don't name your daughter Princess or Neveah. Don't name your son Kal-el. (Oh, I hate Nic Cage too.)

Cinematic: When the lead male (or female) character in a romantic movie crosses that borderline from cute to creepy but it is left unaknowledged by the movie itself. A man camping out on my lawn for my attention is not cute, he's disturbed. Waiting by my door/inside my apartment? Whoah there crazy. Trying to peek into the window/falling in love by way of voyerism? Makes me a bit uneasy.
--Also Pretty Woman. It is the epitome of all that can and is wrong with the movie industry.

Internet: Those myspace/facebook/whatever surveys that people fill out. Why do you think I want to know who your last text came from? Better yet, why is it important to anyone if you're 'missing someone right now'. I dont care. That person you miss probably cares even less.

Other: People who are weird about their coffee. 12 pumps of vanilla? half-caf-non-dairy-splenda-whipped-cappuccino? No. No you should not be allowed to order like that. It should be a crime. There needs to be a limit as to what humans are allowed to make other humans create for them. These things...it's just not okay.

I'm really going to enjoy this - sadly, as I've read through the list, I've come to realize just how many things make me insanely furious. Here goes:

CINEMATIC: I had forgot about this one until yesterday when I came across a Jean Claude Van Damme movie and bile gurgled up in my throat. How come in everyfriggin' movie he's in they have to show a single kick (or punch) from like, seven different angles and speeds? Seriously, there was a single roundhouse they showed from left , right, above, behind, slow motion, fast motion, friggin' backwards and in blackand white. CHRISSAKE! I purposely watched the rest of it just for the sake of anger. I likes anger.

INTERNET: Not sure if this counts, but I hate text-messaging. A short, single one kinda makes sense, but when I see someone sitting there and fucking having a dialogue with someone via text messaging, I want to shake them until they black out. YOU HAVE A PHONE! USE IT LIKE A GODDAM PHONE! THAT'S WHY... Ahh, screw it. It'll never go away. Bitterness...

OTHER: When did it become commonplace for purchases under twenty five bucks to not require a signature? Horrible grammar there - sorry. And I loathe when the clerk looks directly at the back of my card where I have written in thick, black Sharpie, "SEE ID" and hands it back to me... That's not my name shitheels, it's a request! Grrr.

Cinema: Unrealistic struggles when there is serious peril at stake. Where is the kicking, clawing, scratching, and knee to the groin, or at least the attempt at these? Not pretty, but way too many movie/TV victims don't even seem to be trying that hard to stay alive, avoid the chloroform, whatever. Just a little arm wrestling and then the locked stare with the bad guy until it's over. Lame.

Internet: Having to wade through pages of posts and messages on topical message boards by posters who want to share all aspects of their lives with their new best friends, including their thoughts on last night's Gray's Anatomy and the rude thing that their mother-in-law said at Thanksgiving. And then more posters pile on with supportive emoticons for #1 and to share their own daily triumphs and outrages. Stay on topic, people!

Other: As others have mentioned, the growing indifference to and even scorn for proper spelling, grammar, and usage. Made all the more painful by the continued proliferation of nonsense political and business-speak. My least favorite of these: grow your business.

cinematic: the fact that a dude has to save the day for a chic in 99% of films. also: characters with no redeeming qualities.

internet: people that start/perpetuate myspace or forum fights. seriously, if you have that much time on your hands why not spend it on something less fruitless?

general: i'm jumping on the bad driver bandwagon. also-people who tell me to smile, and complete strangers who speak to me as though my sole purpose of existance is to look pretty for them. seriously, how is approaching a strange woman with "damn girl you're hot" in any way appropriate?

To Stella: Yes it is indeed that Lamar, and I head north in the morning and south at night and I hateitsomuchitmakesmecrazy! If I didn't live and work off of it I'd find another route but bypassing it would just take up the same amount of time as sitting in traffic does now. If it were actually affordable for me to live near my workplace I would but it's in the UT/Hyde Park area. Fortunately my work hours are now off the peak traffic times, but still on random days it can be packed. It must be due to all the weekday bar-hoppers or something.

Forgot to mention a pet peeve fun fact:

When in a bar or restaurant in Slovakia, if you tell the waitress "pat' piv" (sounds like pet peeve), she'll bring you five beers. Good times.

Cinematic: Overuse of the same short list of "A-list" stars, which means that superior actors are routinely passed over. It's criminal that Cruise and Cage are everywhere, but we only get small doses of Nathan Fillion, Kevin McKidd & Christopher Eccleston. And since I mention, McKidd, damn NBC to hell. But make them release "Journeyman" on DVD before they go.

Internet: The "cool kid"/"gang" phenomenon that ultimately appears in forums (and comment sections). I'm actually thinking of TWOP back when it was in its prime or even Fametracker, but over the last couple of months this has become increasingly visible at Pajiba.

Other: Corporate control of TV networks. I grew up in the 1970s, when the studio head was the be-all, end-all on programming decisions. So after I saw "The TV Set" and listened the commentaries, I had a particularly rude awakening. There's clearly a disadvantage to having a single person holding a lot of control, sure--but if we were back in the 70s setup, we'd probably still be watching "Firefly", "Drive", "Night Stalker" (the last episode was the best one, dammit!), "Veronica Mars" and "Journeyman".

Shit. I am literally sick over the "Journeyman" news. God forbid NBC offers a subtle, quietly compelling show for intelligent adults.

Cinematic: when actors pretend to play an instrument they have obviously not studies at all.
Internet: NFSF ads.
Other: tardiness.

Cinematic: Bad scores in tv and film that make you aware of the director's heavy handed attempt at drama. Also, I can't stand Julia Stiles.

Internet: Those ad theme wraps on blogs/websites. For example, on the myspace homepage, the whole page is themed for 'Beowulf'. Irritates the hell outta me.

Other: People who ask me a question without at least attempting to figure the problem out themselves. At least make a feeble attempt to locate the file from your computer before begging me to resend it to you.

Also, I hate it when people assume my gay friend is my boyfriend. Can't two people of the opposite sex hang out and not be together?

Cinematic: When any character in any movie reacts to something by screaming "Nooooooooooooooo!"
Internet: I have a friend who types her first name in the subject line of every email she sends. It aggravates the hell out of me.
Other: People who misuse the word "weary" when they really mean "wary."

Cinematic: People threatening other people with a gun to the head, yelling some, and THEN cocking the gun (this is usually worse on tv)



guy with gun" "TELL ME WHERE THE DRUGS/MONEY/BOMB/MY DAUGHTER IS"

guy with gun to head: Witty, antagonistic comment

guy with gun:[racks shotgun] "TELL ME"

you might as well threaten someone with you thumb and index finger for all the good an un-cocked gun does.



Internet: People who complain about pop-up adds, when it takes about 30 seconds to go to the mozilla site and download adblock+ for firefox



Other: Those fucking Croc shoes. I don't care how comfortable they are; they look like shit, and shouldn't be worn unless you are a nurse or in your garden. I hate them so much, I wish I had a special machete like Naveen Andrews had in Planet Terror, but so I could chop off the feet (instead of the balls) of people who think they are acceptable footwear. UGG boots come in a close second.

Impatient, reckless drivers in a hurry, you know the ones: driving a '74 Volare or a clapped out '86 Honda Civic with a gigantic space shuttle grade "carbon fiber" wing. These guys are cutting people off and honking their way thru traffic and they are UNEMPLOYED, I'm positive they aren't expected anywhere so why the hurry?

I have a theory (seriously) about people who don't use turn signals. Where I live, if you're driving along, and there's plenty of room to make a lane change, the second you turn on your blinker, the other car will speed up to block you. Happens every single time. It's as if they can't stand the idea of someone else being in front of them. So, I'm wondering if some people are foregoing the signal in an effort to avoid that? Not that it's right, but it seems to be a reasonable theory.

Cinematic: Usually the end of a movie, our hero gets into a cab, cabbie asks him where he wants to go, hero just says says "home" and we cut to the cab pulling out from the curb. Apparently there's a bunch of psychic cabbies out there.

Internet: Facebook poking. Look, if you have poked me 10 times and I haven't poked you back, that's your cue to stop, not send messages asking why I haven't poked you. It's just sad man.

Other: Loud/annoying/just plain stupid people in cinemas. I can deal with this when I go see some shitty blockbuster, but not at the local indie theatre during a Godard marathon. Sit down, shut up, and for fucks sake leave the goddamn theater to answer your phone.

JanetFaust, oi. I feel your pain. I live way South but work in RR... I had to change my work hours just so I could hopefully hit the tail end of rush hour. Still sucks major ass.

pinkcheese, you must live in the Bay Area. I've noticed this phenomenon of assholes speeding up as soon as they see a turn signal as well. I guess this is along the same lines as the "racing" mentality that an earlier poster noted. The obvious solution, which many people can't seem to figure out, is to turn on your blinker, and go! Don't sit in the damn lane for 5 minutes waiting for someone to let you in! I guess that's another pet peeve of mine.

Oh, I just thought of another one. I hate it that sometimes when I'm trying to pass someone, as soon as he looks over and sees that I'm a woman, he speeds up and won't let me pass. Yeah, that proves your manhood.

Long time reader,first time poster. I'm in a pissy mood so I couldn't resist this diversion...

Movies: Pairing an attractive woman with a guy she wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole in real life. I know it's fiction, but c'mon!

Internet: Excessive use of "WTF","OMG","LOL", ect. It takes 5 seconds to type it out, and I'm guessing if you're posting on a discussion board/blog/whatever, you're not that strapped for time.

Other: Kids who don't know how to fucking behave in public,especially in a theatre. Kicking my seat and throwing popcorn at people doesn't make you cool,you little shit.

Oh,and I agree 100% with the bookstore bag policy. We got that at Carleton too!

damn! look at all the angry people
I'll keep it brief....

cinema: mandy moore

Internet: links on completely random words causing enormously irritating large pop-ups in the middle of the page.

other: sniffing.. blow your nose already.

Cinematic: Time-filler montage set to a pop song.

Internet: The word "meh."

Other: The complete abandonment of spelling and grammar in advertising.

Had to add to mine, as I was inspired by people's shared belief in movie-going etiquette:

Major Peevage goes out to all of the brilliant humorists who shout out some lame attempt at a witty remark after every damn trailer at the movies. You are not funny enough to address the crowd sir--please shut your cakehole or keep your 7th Grade attempt at stand-up to you and your friends. Thanks.

And extra shame on those who offer encouragement to these punks.

Cinematic: when a movie's humor/purpose is to be ironically self aware (shrek). Its funny when they throw a little bit in now and again but not when that's all the movie consists of, and when the audience claps at the end of a movie. I don't care how good it is, Don't do it.

internet: someone already said this, but grammar asshole nazi's. I get hating IM talk, but if someone messes up "then" and "then" or something you don't have to pitch a fit about it. Find some other way to feel superior.

Other: When someone takes something out of the microwave early and doesn't clear the numbers so that you can see the clock, and then if I want to see the time I have to get up and clear it. It's even worse when they take it out when there is only a few seconds left. Couldn't you just let it finish cooking. I am aware that it's not a big deal, but that's why it's a pet peeve.

Other: 'guesstimate.' Most unnecessary word in the English language.

Posted by: Genevieve at November 28, 2007 2:39 PM

i love you

my cinematic pet peeves?

hollywood deciding that tom cruise can still carry a movie
john ravolta and nick cage thinking we are duped by their fake hair
meg ryan and melanie griffith (and many others) ruining their faces with plastic

my internet pet peeves?

pop up ads
saving my log in
ppl who use prolly n gr8 n shit like this. fucking take the extra goddamn second to try and spell out the fucking word

all of my other pet peeves?

oh, they are many
the asshole i work with showing up high and late every fucking day. i don't care that he gets high, but, fuck, he can't work when he's tweeking.
my boss pretending not to notice that his pet employee is high and late everyday and fucking up his job.
my stoner-ass co-worker "accidentally" letting a customer know what our markup is on an engine.
the fucking burnout sipping (slurping) his coffee loud as fuck and chewing with his mouth open.
the rehab-ready asshole actually thinks he is the best fucking employee in the place, too. and he likes to tell everyone that.
shit
sorry, i was distracted.
by the way, i think detroit gave you turn signals for a reason. use them.
oh, and nys trying to force the HPV vaccine on my daughters. why don't we try educating our children about the risks associated with unsafe sex?? don't force me to unnecessarily shoot this shit into my midgets.
people who say "blesh you" when i sneeze
my mother talks with her mouth full at the dinner table while i'm teaching my girls proper manners. thanks for showing them how it's done.
oh, i am in a foul mood today. thanks for the venting opportunity!

Cinema: bad dissolves. Probably my photographer/film maker roommate rubbing off on me.

Internet: I'm an online political activist by trade, so this may be a bit of a surprise, but GMail is by far the most annoying thing ever. Don't get me wrong: as a consumer, I'm in love with it. But setting up an email for my clients' subscriber lists always takes 30% longer than it should while I look for that one little kink in the code that GMail uses as an excuse to totally fuck up the HTML.

Other: the insane level of inconvenience of getting to the DMV everywhere I've lived since college started. Getting a parking permit in Chicago involved going to three different offices. Getting my car licensed in DC's Maryland suburbs meant going fully twelve miles away from the city during business hours. (Ever try to drive on the Beltway during the day?) NYC's are worse; of course, I want to sell the damn thing, so I probably won't even bother.

Cinematic: Those kisses at the end of romantic comedies. They almost never look like actual kisses, you can't see their faces, while the entire movie you're waiting for them to hook up, and then it just ends!!! It ends. There's no sex, there's nothing other than a bland, dry kiss. It makes me so damn mad. The only kiss I actually liked was in "Never Been Kissed". I know, I know....but I'm a girl and I like to watch them and sometimes I just want real goddamn passion!

Internet: Somehow I cannot get my google talk to work, so I'm stuck with google chat, and I can't close my email to do it, so 9 or 10 friends will start to chat with me at the same time, while I'm trying to focus on ONE, my best friend in Taiwan, and I obviously can't say I have to go do something else because they will see me still logged on and...ugh, it's so annoying.

Other: This is rather specific, but I was at work today and I asked a woman a perfectly normal question to identify what something was, and her response? "You aren't Italian, are you?" What the FUCK??????? No, goddamn it, I'm not, who gives a fuck? Just because most of the people in my town are either Italian or Polish doesn't make me fucking sad that I'm not! No, I'm NOT Italian, but guess what, I've been to Italy, and probably 30 more countries than you ever have, bitch, so shut the fuck up!

Cinematic: "Nooooooooooooooo!" When I watched Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, I actually screamed this in harmony with Darth Vader's own agony-laced scream. Even when it's done in an ironic fashion, it still pisses me off, because it's really beyond funny.

Internet: Fucking facebook. Probably one of the most redundant forms of technology known to man, Facebook is nowadays populated by, well, just about everyone with internet, and that pisses me off. This way-around-the-constitution quasi-government registry is one of the scariest concoctions of all time. But, more than anything, it's just fucking lame. Every time some person asks me, "Are you on facebook?" it drives me further from opening an account. The lingo and the stupidity of it all is pathetic. I really can't wait to see a terrorist threat appear on facebook, it's only a matter of time. But, of course, the facebook terrorist threat would be, by definition, lame. I hereby chastise all facebook users, myspace users, and any other user of a social networking site. Social networking is gay and you really need to get over it.

Other: unnecessary asinine talking. Australians call Americans 'seppos', but being an impartial foreigner from neither of those countries, I can say that nobody talks more shit than Australians. Conciseness does not exist in the MacQuarie dictionary, I've listened to Australians have conversations that could have been wrapped up in a matter of seconds but take hours. It's really shocking, especially paired with their abhorrent accent. Yes, a complete lack of insight is a pet peeve, especially when there's a nation where this is prevalent.

Cinema: Movies titles that are an "-ing" verb + a noun or name. "Becoming Jane" "Chasing Amy" "Stealing Beauty" "Stealing Innocence" "Leaving Las Vegas" "Kissing Jessica Stein" "Being John Malkovich" "Being Julia" There's about a million of them. I refuse to even watch a movie with one of these titles.



Internet: It makes celebrities of people like Tila Tequila and Perez Hilton.



Other: When people crack their gum. Do they really think that everyone around them wants to hear obnoxious noises coming out of their mouths? I could walk around just randomly burping or snorting like a pig. How would that be any different?

Cinematic: When a TV/film character orders "a beer" at the bar, and the bartender fills the order as if no further clarification is needed.

Cinematic: I really hate when the font in the opening credits isn't visible.

Internet: It really bugs me that Netflix Watch Instantly does not work on Mac computers.

Other: It really bugs me when people talk about their friends that you don't know as if you do know them. My sister did this for the duration of our Thanksgiving dinner, and I wasn't the only one annoyed.

Another thing that really irks me is when people break before they turn on their blinker.

Cinematic: Spit takes and pratfalls. These will never ever get funny...actually I change my cinematic pet peeve to Jim Carrey. I just watched A Series of Unfortunate Events, and he overacted an overactor. A perverse talent.

Internet: People using radical diction in forum discussions to win the point. Not every person we may discuss is a villain, victim, or matter. Buy some nuance, kthxbye.

General: The chick in my watercolor class who won't shut the hell up about how she thinks the professor's critique is a joke, she's already accepted to XYZ prestiguous art school and who is he to say that, she hates people in the parking lot, etc. Annette, you are ruining my Zen. I also hate fat Gail who stole my chair on grounds of fatness. Fatty.

Oh, and strangers that feel the need for unnecessary touching. One of these days I'm gonna do some unnecessary punching.

Movies: Oh-so-witty-look-at-me banter. (JOSS WHEDON)

Internet: Myspace and the culture it spawned.

Real life: Professors who think their class is the only one you're taking. (John Craig, you bastard, with your 500 pages of readings a week . . .)

Cinematic: When girl starts movie in sweater and jeans, or t-shirt and jeans, or whatever else reasonable outfit, and then, due to contrived plot device, changes into slinky nightgown or slutty party outfit and then never has 'opportunity' to change out of it so that the whole movie can be filled with her heaving bosom.

Internet: flickery flashy ads. Yes, I get it. You're trying to make me look at you, and it's working. It's also giving me epilepsy.

Other: people who say 'I'm so bad!' or 'I'm totally in the mood to irritate everyone today!' in this chipper voice that insinuates that this is a desirable personality trait, or (I think this is more to the point) suggests that even though they're so bad/irritating, everyone loves them enough that they'll hang around them anyways. This is mostly found, from what I can remember, in high school girls with low self-esteem.

Movies - how Quentin Tarantino insists on putting himself in his otherwise fine films even though no one likes his acting or wants to see him on screen.

Internet - adults who create Myspace pages for themselves that center completely around their insufferable narcissism and unbelievably shallow lives. If you are over 25 & have a Myspace page that features photos of yourself playing beer pong, you're one of them. Everyone laughs at you about it behind your back. Do yourself a favor & take it down (or dignify it up at least).

Other - being stuck in line at the pharmacy/convenience store behind some drooling moron who insists on making their transaction as difficult and lengthy as possible in spite of the line forming behind them. I have no idea what I may have done in a previous life to deserve it, but I am doomed to forever be the loser who just wants to pay for his five dollars worth of crap and get out of there but can't because he's trapped behind the idiot who has $85 worth of stuff on the counter and is repeatedly getting their credit card declined & needs to call the bank to straighten it out.

Movies: Excessive bodily humor.

Internet: Ads in between blocks of text (top, bottom, or sides is fine, just not so they interrupt my reading).

Other: People who come to a test or exam with a cold, cough, or other noise-making thing, and proceed to sniff/cough/clear throat/tap foot for the entire exam.

Movies: Using the Carmina Burana as the preview soundtrack. Duh duh da duh! Duh duh da duh! We get it, we get it, it's exciting and suspenseful.

Internet: Improper grammar. Just because something is virtual doesn't mean it should be virtually incomprehensible.

Other: Just about everything, but today it's people who take their snotty-nosed toddlers on the bus, and then let them run around and scream at strangers while spewing them with mucous. Lovely.

Oh, and strangers that feel the need for unnecessary touching. One of these days I'm gonna do some unnecessary punching.

Posted by: Kris at November 28, 2007 10:58 PM

Oh, absolutely. I love hugs/physical contact with friends, but if I dont know you? Do not touch. Drives me mad.

And to lolrus: well played. Made me lolz.

Late to the party as per usual but here are mine:

Cinema: Anything tacked on to appeal to members of the "non target demographic" I refer to "love stories" in action movies that serve no plot related purpose, stunt casting of action stars in comedies, gross out humour in RomComs.

Internet: Web pages with sound. Especially embedded midis or those fucking whistling smiley adverts. This irritates me so much that I have disabled my computer speakers and only ever plug them in if I'm watching a video clip.

Other: Any misunderstanding resulting from someone not being able to get their words out. Missed the girl you love cause you just couldn't tell her? Blew your top at someone because you wouldn't let them tell their side of the story and now they're dead and you can't get over it? Sorry. All. Your. Fucking. Fault. This also applies to not revealing crucial information that prevents a correct medical diagnosis because of some deep seated issue or embarassment.

I am aware that the above mainly referrs to contrived TV plots but it irks me something fierce.

SamanthaT: add to the lack due diligence when portraying professions how they completely ignore proper trial procedure just so they can get in "the comeuppance" moment in the courtroom, evidence rules be damned. (I'm looking at YOU, CSI)

Cinematic: films about women who are supposedly smart and powerful and can "kick-ass" and yet still feel the need to vamp it up and dress like hookers- then they try to sell themselves as good role model films for young girls. Cameron Diaz and Jessica Alba are the LAST women in Hollywood to consider role models...at least Paris doesn't pretend to be something more than she is.

Internet: Today's teenage generation is either sexing it up on YouTube or showing the rest of the world how selfish and stupid they are by posting videos on how to hack into websites/electronic devices, and steal music/movies. Based on myspace alone I want to die at a young age because Lord knows when they start running the world, its going to be a very disgusting place.

Real Life: Housewives/Stay-At-Home moms. You spend your entire life having a dream of what you want to become when you grow older, then you spend your parents' (or some scholarship programs') money to go to college and earn a degree that you just THROW AWAY once you meet some guy and pop out his kids. Way to show your children that women really can be taken as seriously as men. Especially since there are tons of underprivledged children out there who actually deserved your seat at a university because they'll use their education to make a difference in the world. Not just change diapers and watch Rachel Ray. Plus, they almost always turn into all-natural anti-vaccination pro-breastfeeding judgmental nazi's on the internet.

Movies:
-Love scenes where the woman keeps her bra,top, whatever on and after sex is so prudish that she keeps her comforter on over her boobs and
you can never see the penis, I cant remember a time where I had sex with a girl in the comfort of my or her home, who kept her bra or top on.
-That fucking PG-13 rating, Have the fucking balls to make a movie about adults for adults. Some movies are suppose to be rated R (Live free or die hard I´m looking at you, not only a bad movie but a toothless one too) and others are suppose to be rated PG-13 (whale rider, how that movie got an R rating shows that the MPAA should just quit, I mean WHAT THE FUCK). NO HORROR MOVIE SHOULD BE RATED PG-13, by making it PG-13 it stops being a horror movie. plus some of the stuff that gets a pg-13 had no right to get a pg-13 (Beowulf for instance, I know its animated, its still to gory for the rating, make another rating class like 15 or make them R)

Internet:
-These celebrity sites who help advocate the disgusting image the fashion magazines try to shove in our face, calling Britney Spears Fat is so wrong, she is skinnier than most of the people that call her that. Call her Crazy, stupid, slutty, retarded, a fucking moron, all true things, if you have 5-10 pounds extra on you, you are not fat and saying that is a lie. (I don´t give a shit about Britney Spears, I just took here name to make a point, I hate Britney and all the moronic things she stands for)
-People that go around in groups beating others up
while filming it, so they can proudly but it on youtube or other sites like that. "We went around me and my five friends, saw this guy waiting for the bus and decided to beet the crap out of him, arent we cool" What the fuck is wrong with these people.

Other:
-People who like to watch the above stuff. SERIUSLY WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU !!!!
-People who talk on the phone in the movie theater I know I´m not the only one, seem like everyone I meet hates when this happens and tells me that everyone they know Hates it when that happens and so on and so on, So my question is this: If everybody hates it when that happens, WHY THE FUCK DOES IT KEEP HAPPENING, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, TURN OF YOUR FUCKING CELL PHONE WHEN INSIDE A MOVIE THEATER, GOD FORBID YOU MISSED A CALL AND THE PERSON CALLING YOU WOULD HAVE TO WAIT FOR 90FUCKING MIN FOR YOU TO CALL THEM BACK. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

Sorry for going on a rant, didn´t know that I would have so much to write down, its just once you take your finger out of the Dyke, its hard to stick it back in there.

Movies - Clunky dialogue in action movies. Is it really that hard to find a writer who passed grade 5? I have friends who could write better scripts than the crap hollywood churns out! The example that immediately comes to mind (though 99% of action movies are in this category) was Transformers. Everything else was serviceable, but would it have killed them to try to make me give a shit about what was happening? Any time giant robots are fighting on screen and i'm bored, something is seriously wrong!

Internet: people that type "knoe" on purpose. That's not even a contraction of a real word! I can kind of understand why slow typers would want to drop letters from words, but "knoe" does nothing but piss me off!

Other: I work in a video shop, and i really, really hate the people who come in and give me a list of movies they want, and expect me to just go and get them. My immediate reaction is to tell them where they can stick their list (obviously) but it's the manager's policy that we have to do what these people ask. It always seems to happen in the middle of the day when i'm working on my own too.

Cinematic: Everyone other than me at the movies. I know I'll sound like an old codger ranting about the 'good ole days,' but I can't seem to actually enjoy a movie these days without some form of public incivility. I know this whole thing is getting tired, but teens with cell phones, gramma and pops continually reviewing plot lines with the catch all query, "What did he say?" Moms and dads who bring their tots to movies like 300. Douchebags who have to comment on every goddamn aspect of the movie. The American movie going public needs a cinematic lobotomy. Sit down, shut the fuck up and try not to bother anyone. We need two screens, one for jagovs and Springer rejects who come to the theater to put their juvenile and senile shenanegans on display for everyone to enjoy, and one for people who actually came to watch a movie. It's been said a million times, find a seat, shove the popcorn into your stupid pie-hole and shut yer fucking yapper!

Internet: This site sponsored by . . . Look, when I'm surfing for hot bikini models, I don't give a shit that I can get a deal on carnuba wax at Crazy Dick's Carnuba Emporium. I don't care if you put the Hai Karate add in there, just move it off to the side. Or if you really want to get my attention, slap your logo on the bikini.

Other: Everyone in front of me during rush hour. It's called rush hour for a reason. MOVE YOUR ASS!! I don't care what you do in front of me, just get it done quickly. I'm convinced I'm at my worst as a human being when some chucklehead is doin 33 in a 35 zone with no one in front of them and 5 miles of cars behind them. Move your ass or you'll have a me sized hole right through you.

other: Insane neighbors who feel the need to comment on my dog every time I take her for a walk. No, she's not as big as your fucking monster of a pitbull and yes he could probably eat her. You don't need to remind me. I think about it every time the fucking untrained thing lunges at her. And quite frankly I could do without your snide ass comments about her general appearance. She's a chihuahua, not a rat and she needs to wear the sweater in the winter, so back off!

Cinematic: Sex in movies is always intense and almost... angry. Few love scenes involve giggling, or genuine connection of any kind. A million years ago, in "The Big Easy," Ellen Barkin told Dennis Quaid "Stop that!" and his response, "Stop THAT... or THAT?" was pitch-perfect, warm and giggle-worthy and still sexy... I've seen little to match it in the aeons since.

Internet: Anything with sound that I don't specifically ask for by clicking something. I use my computer to work, sometimes in an actual office, with actual colleagues who do not want to hear me being congratulated on being selected to win a free iPod, and sometimes in libraries, where I don't wish to disturb fellow patrons with the unexpectedly loud link I click on while doing a quick Google search. Yes, I can turn off the sound on my computer entirely before entering my office or local library-- usually I do. But c'mon, web-designers... why do I have to?

Other: Me oh my oh... don't even get me started.

1.) People who INCORRECTLY correct my grammar, complete with either smug facial expression (if in person), or the kind of smugness that you can feel oozing through the keyboard at you (if in writing). For example, those who tell me, thinking they're teaching me something, "AFFECT is the verb, EFFECT is the noun." In general that's true, but effect can, in fact, be a verb as well, meaning, "to act so as to bring into existence," as in, "to effect a change." Effect is more commonly used as a noun, true, but.... if you're going to go all Amateur Grammar Nazi and attempt to humble someone by correcting them in public, you really had better know your stuff. To the uncle who routinely corrects my sister in public in a condescending tone of voice, and who is, on top of the smugness, quite often wrong in his corrections: you are cruising for a beat-down.

2.) The subatomic toasticles that are always in the butter. Cruchity little bits of nerve-janglage, they are.

Cinematic: People who talk during movies, whether it is to explain to the idiot next to them what is actually happening or vice versa(How can you not know? It's right in front of you!!). Also the a-holes that are too self-righteous to turn their cell phones off. I seriously doubt you are a doctor and on-call. You don't even look like you could change the oil in my car. I doubt there's a Ford Escort emergency that you have to attend to. In movies themselves, portraying people that live in the South as inbred, backwater, retards who don't know how to use a fork at a dinner table or tie their own shoes.

Internet: Perez Hilton.. I loved the picture of him with a shiner. What a douchebag.

Other: I live in Texas and see both of these a lot. 1) "Dipping" or chewing tobacco. It's disgusting. My husband's brother (an otherwise charming and intelligent man) will sit AT THE DINNER TABLE after eating, get a plastic cup, put a napkin in it (I guess this helps, I don't know what the purpose is), put a motherfucking dip in his mouth, and sit there and spit while we all have drinks. GROSS! Also, there is a lot of watching men spit dip out of truck windows (naturally). 2) Driving/Traffic. Holy crap! The people who drive in this state are insane. No one uses turn signals, people make right hand turns from a left hand lanes or vice versa (really?)... it's pretty much like jungle rules driving here. It has created a large amount of road rage in me.

Cinematic - Twist endings that come completely from left field and could not have been foreseen by anyone because it was purposely avoided by the filmmaker(s). The most glaring example of this is Ocean's Twelve. That most pissed me off to no end.

Internet - People who blog about every mundane thing that happens to them. It's great that you ate a sandwich and watched some cartoons yesterday, but does the world really need to know?

Other - People who say "you know it?" all the time. I knew a guy in high school that used to tell me something that there wasn't any way on earth that I could possibly have foreknowledge of and then ask that. He'd say something like, "dude, my stomach hurts, you know it?" It bothered the hell out of me.

*"most" should read "movie."

Oh pet peeves! How I love thee! Let me count the ways...

Cinematic: Slo-mo walking away like in all Michael Bay movies. Just thinking about Armaggedon makes me twitch.

Internet: SPELLING AND GRAMMAR errors. In a blog, who cares, but goodness knows these news websites have editors. Are they getting paid to sit with their thumbs up their assess?

Other: It's called a yield sign, found at the end of pretty much all on-ramps. It means that you, moron driving the on-ramp, must actually yield to the traffic on the road, street, highway. "Yield" doesnt' translate into, "Sure, just move into the lane when you feel like it; they'll move over. Trust me! And don't signal either. That would just be stupid."

Cinematic: you've all covered them so well-geezer, young woman, remakes, torture porn. Thankyousomuch.

Internet: I know it's been done, but professional websites with spelling and grammar errors. I read an article in USA today last week, that talked about how a football rivalry was RIVEN by history. Not driven, riven. And it was in large print-IN THE TITLE.

Other: People who are unable to answer a direct question. When I ask "what time is it?" I do not wish to hear "not that late" or "we have plenty of time". Guess what? I want to know what freaking time it is! Obviously that's just an example, but you get the point.

Runner-up: People who are so invested in the way things have always been or "should be" done, they practically short-circuit when you want to do something differently-even with no impact whatsoever, on their lives.

oh no! i'm a pet peeve!

posessed = possessed ;)

Cinematic: cliche-ridden cinematography

Internet: Raving Liberal blogs full of dangerously ignorant rants. TIME articles of the same.

Television: CBS. Jerry Bruckheimer musical discovery montages.
The words '"Pushing Daisies" at a special time' at the begining of the 8 o'clock hour on the VHS tape I just used to record the 8, and not the 9 o'clock hour.

Other: People who say "pet-peeve". Yes, I hate myself when I have done it. I hate myself right now.
Also: Gum popping/cracking/smacking sends me into a homicidal rage.

People who nitpick about grammar, and the towfer, people who say "Such and such grammatical mistake is a pet peeve of mine." Also the same people who can't communicate a coherent or original thought. Like most English teachers I have ever had.

People who think New Yorkers are more cultured and literate than Southerners. New Yorkers, like DEM who claim to be diverse because they're New Yorkers, but who insult and dismiss almost the entire rest of the US. "Oh, THEY shop at Ross. Philistines!"

People who pepper their language with irrelevant swearing.

I had better stop there.

Cinema: Nicholas Cage and Cameron Diaz. People still giving Lindsay Lohan roles in movies. Sex in movies. How often have you left your bra on during sex in your own bedroom? And I know people just love her for being the second freaking coming of Audrey Hepburn or something, but I cannot stand Natalie Portman. She's been in some movies I like, but she is so damn pretentious and her movies could have certainly made it with another actress.

Internet: I totally agree about those ads that pop up and block everything when you accidently drag your cursor over it.

Other: It's been said a million times, but most things that have to do with driving can be included in my pet peeve list. I can't stand when people who are driving a 1992 Chevy Malibu have a huge spoiler and rims. I hate when people pull out in front of me when absolutely no one is behind me, when people are riding my ass when I'm already going, like, 85 in a 55 mile zone, slow drivers in the left lanes, being behind an SUV because you can't see ANYTHING ahead of you at all...the list of things on the road that piss me off goes on and on.

Also, people who lack manners (if someone holds the door open for you, why not just say thank you?), the Philadelphia Parking Authority, parents who let their kids run amok, using a cell phone when at dinner or somewhere with another person, those huge double side-by-side strollers religious fundies who want to impose their beliefs on everyone else. Especially pharmacists and doctors who won't provide contraception to women because it "goes against their beliefs." Get a different job then bitches.

Long list, sorry, I'm having a pissy day!

cinematic: American movies set in foreign countries, where the characters speak English, but with an accent. Example: Memoirs of a geisha. What's the deal with that, USA?

internet: Music forums. You know, the hipsters'. People can be such party poopers.

other: People who don't respect other people's food. For example, when there's X number of things to share, and someone has more than they should. It really annoys me.

Cinematic: Inconsistencies. Goes right along with the cell phone dial tone thing. I can appreciate that Sci-Fi and Fantasy flicks generally HAVE to show things that aren't physically possible, but sweet jesus, (and I'm going to reference one of my old favorites here, just the same) HACKERS. Please me with a branding iron. The least they could do is show them typing in a macro or even inserting a function call into a program or something! Don't make it look so damn easy! It takes hours, even days, to write a proper function call. And most of the time, you have to write the function calls that are in your function call...anyway, programmers know what I'm talking about...CGI has ruined my reality...

Internet: Again, I'm sorry to say it boils down to programming... I love Netflix like a dear, dear friend, but I have over 400 movies in my queue, and (here comes my second Internet peeve) I can't stand having to spend hours on shuffling my queue. So I went to their Contact Us section to ask for something very simple. A damn RANDOMIZE button at the bottom of the queue. All the programming is already there, it just takes a half-hour or so of thought, and a few lines of code. What did I get as a response? My all-time pet peeve, of course: Bullshit excuses for lazy and/or bad programming. I was told that it wouldn't be feasable because, for people ordering TV Series' (of which I am), it would put them all out of order. Lazy. And what did they do a month or so later? Put up a useless Drag&Drop feature that you could turn off in My Account. WHY THE FUCK CAN'T THEY DO THAT FOR MY RANDOMIZE??!? My life is slipping away reorginizing that damn queue.

Other: People who talk about other's bad driving habits, when they (more often than not) DO THE SAME DAMN THING!! i.e. seeing someone is going faster than you in the other lane, and knowing they have to change lanes in front of you because there's another car coming up, so you speed up just to keep them changing lanes. Then getting a smile on your face because you get some sick satisfaction from cockblocking another driver. And to top it all off, you scream bloody murder when someone does it to you. And yes, I'm talking to you dad. Fucking hipocrite. I wish my trannie hadn't broken...I have to deal with that on the daily.

Also people that swear they're logical, but when they accuse someone of some kind of sinister behaviour with absolutely nothing to back it up, they retort with "I KNOW that's why he did it, goddammit." You don't know shit, dad.

I really need to get my car fixed...but I feel like a wieght has been lifted...

And why the HELL does this post look like a run-on sentence in the preview? peeve...

Cinematic (and tv): women who are supposed to be in their pajamas but are clearly still wearing a bra.

Internet: The at work who email their assistant to tell them to ask me for something. So then I get that email forwarded to me. Oh, what's that? You're important?

General: The idiots who try to get on the subway before I get off. The idiots who lean against the pole in the subway so that it is a)between their ass cheeks b)leaves no room for people to actually hold on. Subway etiquette is important to me, okay?
Also, people who are using a handsfree cellphone device and glare when I mistakenly think they are talking to me. Oh I am sorry - you're talking on your invisible phone! My bad.

Cinematic (and tv): women who are supposed to be in their pajamas but are clearly still wearing a bra.

Posted by: ewg at November 29, 2007 3:53 PM

I wear a bra to bed. Why is that such a bad thing?

But I'll second the comment about women in movies wearing so much makeup to bed. Gross! Do they then just pile on more in the morning?

Cinematic: So many, but the most recent to cross my mind is women (in movies) who wake up from sleep with full, impeccably-situated makeup. Whenever I wake up in my makeup (omigod I inadvertently quoted Courtney Love. That's never happened before, and it may never happen again), I also wake up with a hangover and half of last night's clothing on my body or in my bed; generally, my mascara is somewhere around my cheekbones, and lip gloss more rims my lips than glosses them. So yeah, the aforementioned scenes annoy the hell out of me.

Internet: I am a copy editor for Web content at my company, so few things annoy me like published errors and long-standing dead links on other sites. These things are so easily corrected, people!

Other: I'll second someone's blinker-on-too-long reference, and add the addition of the "high priority" big red exclamation point on minor, mundane, routine e-mails in Outlook (marketing department, I'm looking at you). And yes, three cheers for basic politeness.

Cinematic: When something really really important transpires in a scene --someone gets slapped, or finds a magic flute -- and then the characters involved don't talk about it until the following scene, when they are like having lunch the next day. Apparently they just sat in silence the whole car ride home.

Internet: Sonogram pictures on my friends' myspace pages.

Other: When a groom and his groomsmen take a group shot with them all wearing sunglasses, holding cigars, and "looking cool."

Also, the word "moist."

Also, talking introductions to R & B songs. "Girl, every time I look at you, I feel something deep inside. I've just got to tell you..."

Mistress Violet - I think we might be the same person and I love you. Fuck the smilers - sometimes I just don't have the goddamn energy. I can't change the overall countenance of my face, deal with it.

Cinematic: Garden State and Natalie Portman's character therein. It was cliched as fuck, people who knew music had heard of the Shins already, screamed "OH MY GOD LOOK HOW 'INDIE' I'M TRYING TO BE WHEN REALLY INDIE MEANS 'WHAT IS TOTALLY POPULAR NOW' I AM THREE SECONDS FROM PAINTING MY LAST TWO FINGERNAILS BLACK AND CALLING MYSELF EMO." Ugh.

Internet: MySpace pictures from before you gained 30 lbs. Legit webpages that use pop-ups because everyone (with windows) has a pop-up blocker. Commenters who post anonymously (I don't post blogs anonymously so you should have the balls to put your name to your words).

Other: Bad drivers. I am a former college athlete and overall healthy person who is going to die of a heart-attack somewhere in Eastern PA because of people from New Jersey who don't understand that the left lane is for passing.

Kalexal - amen to the attire issue. Same thing where I work. Colleagues, I know exactly how much money you make, for we are on a lockstep system. I know damn well that amount can easily cover dry-cleaning and a shoe shine. Get it together, people. There is no excuse for wearing a rumpled polo shirt

Very late, but I am compelled.

Cinematic: Slow motion. It's a fucking explosion behind you, flinch!

Internet: Those that use 'sweetie' or 'hun' when trying to make someone else look stupid. Left/right wing blogs that ignore their own scandals, which is why I don't read any of them.

Other:
College kids that talk on their phone while crossing the street when they're not supposed to. Using your cell phone in class, or anywhere really. Especially for meaningless conversations. "What're you up to? Oh me? Nothing much, just shopping."
Drivers who don't merge, but drift over.
Parents who don't parent. No your kid cannot fucking smack his hand on the fish tank, if you're not going to tell him I will.
People who don't take care of their pets. Yes this food is expensive lady, but the food at the grocery store is as good as cardboard, that's why you get 40lbs for $10. No, I'm not lying when I say turtles need two kinds of light. AND THEY GROW!!! Get a bigger fucking aquarium or don't get your snotty brat a turtle.
People who treat pet stores like a vet's office. If I tell you your dog has parvo and is going to die if you don't take him to a vet, don't pick up a product off the shelf and ask if it will work.
Anyone that under dresses for a nice restaurant. I know you have one pair of slacks or a dress, just wear it and suck it up. Jeans don't cut it.
And sweatpants are meant for home or exercise. Same with pajama pants. You don't look cute with your hello kitty pajama pants on and an oversized hoodie.
People who can't park. Back up and fucking line it up. Especially my next door apartment neighbor.

I think I better stop here.
I feel better though, thanks.

Cinematic:
Overly done CG scenes. I can get past a little CG to make an impossible scene possible, but if it is unnecessary or excessive it just looks like a cartoon (I like cartoons, just not cartoons trying to look real and vice versa).

Internet:
Grammar.

Other:
Exclamation points. I absolutely hate them. I have not used an exclamation point since I was old enough to know better and I have no respect for those who do.

Kalexal & The Stew, I couldn't agree more about the clothing issues, particularly pajama bottoms. I can't stand seeing people go to class/work in those things. It's the ultimate in lazy dressing. Seriously, they look like they just rolled their ass out of bed, slapped on a pair of flip-flops and walked out the door. No pride in appearance whatsoever.

Driving badly in the fast lane. Ok, I get that you suck at driving. Take your ass over to the slow lane! Use your turn signal! And get off the damn phone!

People who scratch their genitals in public. A coworker of mine does this, a female one at that. You might have a vicious case of crabs, but that doesn't mean I want to know about it.

Out of control kids. I see I'm not alone in this one. I'm all in favor of those kid leashes. That's right. Your little bastard is no more special than anyone else's, and doesn't have the right to run like some lunatic in the supermarket/movies/anywhere. Either get a grip on him, or I will.

Yay! I love this topic!

Cinematic: People who talk in movie theatres, people who bring their bratty children into movie theatres, and people who insist on keeping a running "oh-so-witty" commentary throughout the movie.

Internet: Anything having to do with Facebook applications. I deleted myspace and got Facebook because Facebook was simple. Now, it's turning into myspace. Also, any form of intarweb sends me over the edge. Enough said.
Other:
So many...and I'm in a bad mood.
1) People who say "sure" or "uh-huh" after every sentence you say. It drives me crazy for some reason.
2) People who have dialogues with text message. Just call the person. Also people who text when walking.
3) Airheads in general. I want to stab a scalpel in my eye when around them.
4) Pseudo-intellectuals.
5) People who take up two parking spaces, therefore you cannot take the vacant spot. How hard is it to repark?
6) "one uppers."
7) People who take pictures of themselves and their stupid friends doing incredibly stupid thing, and then post them on Facebook. I don't care that you ate at Qdoba, nor do I care about your beer pong game.
8)Abercrombie and Fitch
9) Fanfiction. It's inane. Also, people who they they are such "gud writerz!"
10) The phrase "get crunk."
11) The kids who dress and act like a walking add from Urban Outfitters. "Look how Indie I am! My purse is a lunchbox! I I'm so trendy and alternative, and advertise it by name dropping the Shins and Camus! Let's rebel against conformity! Everyone else is doing it!"
12) lip service/hypocrites/people who let you down.
13) People who walk out in the middle of the street. There is a crosswalk over there. Use it.
14) People who pretend to sympathize, but really aren't listening to a word you're saying.
15) Finally, twelve year olds that try to look like 21 year olds, and the "stars" of today.
Wow...that was much longer than I intended. Ranting is good, however.

Searching for the Jeff Bridges "Fearless" movie review on this site and only coming up with the martial arts "Fearless" movie review. I know it's there somewhere--it's a recent review darn it!

I know I'm so late here and noone is going to read this, but it feels good to vent anyway. My huge cinematic pet peeve is the "hotness" bias. It's fine and dandy for the dumpy/geeky/stupid guy to get the hot girl, but you rarely if ever see the ugly/geeky girl get the hot guy. Why?!

Cinematic: The comeuppance... when the douchebag/asshole/asshat get's what's coming to him/her... shit don't play like that in real life

Internet: Those motherfucking emoticons which make sounds when you move the cursor over them

Other: People who have their bluetooth permanently attached to their ear and insist on answering calls during meetings they have fucking called.

Cinematic: All Americans can shoot a gun effectively. Even if they have never held one in their lives. Can't hit us, swarthy-skinned professional soldiers!

Except if they're chicks. To shoot someone, a chick practically has to have a nervous breakdown. And how many times have you seen her disarmed by a villain just holding out a hand and taking it from her? Oh, and she's only allowed to shoot to defend a) herself, or b) a little, tiny child. Anything else would be too immasculating.

Internet: posters who defend sexist cliches as "natural". It's natural I come around and kick your ass.

Other: practically everything. But today, people who can't spell, or use English grammar, and don't think they have to! You can have your freedom of speech, as long as I am free to think you are an idiot.

Cinematic: The musical montage in a rom-com when the recently-broken-up-for-some-ridiculous-reason couple individually stare out their penthouse windows at the rain and eat pizza alone and look fondly at objects the other person gave them.

And, what's so often the reason for such a break-up - in the movies no one ever EXPLAINS anything. The wrong-doer/misunderstanding-er says, "Let me explain," the other person interrupts or walks away, and the wrong-doer DOESN'T EVEN TRY AGAIN! Doesn't chase after them, doesn't try to fix anything but just goes off to mope and stare out windows! UGH!

Internet: When a site lets you check a box to remember you, but then NEVER FUCKING REMEMBERS YOU. (this is not a not-allowing-cookies problem either because other websites work fine) Also, in my Yahoo account, there's a button to click to stay logged in for two weeks. But it makes me re-log in every single day, even multiple times in a day.

Other: When your job requires you to do some assinine, arbitrary thing that makes no fucking sense and has no relation to your job, or else they won't give you your Christmas bonus. BASTARDS!

Cinematic: Predictable plot "twists". You know what I'm talking about.

Internet: I have two. People who type like this: "OMFG u wnt bleeve who jst txtd me, lolololololololo! sooooooo hawtt!!!" It's bothersome in text messages as well. My other is broken script.

Other: Facebook. I have an account that I rarely check, but when I do all I have are about 5 billion requests to applications. If I already said no to 5 vampire requests, what makes you think I'll say yes to the 6th, 7th, or 8th ones?