Pajiba

I second Battlefield Earth and The Matrix Reloaded (though I really do prefer to pretend that that one doesn't exist and that I never saw it).

I would add:
Spy Kids 3D
The first two new Star Wars movies (could not bring myself to see the third, though I've heard it is actually the best of the three.)
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Maid in Manhattan

There are others, but I can't think of them just yet.

Gigli?

Waiting
Black Snake Moan
I Know Who Killed Me
I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry
The Wicker Man

Those are just a few, I could go on and on. There really are very few excellent movies.

Bloodrayne. You have to feel sorry for poor Ben Kingsley.

Oh, and don't forget every movie Jessica Alba has ever made.

Note: Twilight is not on the list because it's a great comedy.

Employee of the Month
Good Luck Chuck
Mamma Mia
The House Bunny
City by the Sea
Revolutionary Road
Farce of the Penguins
Juno

...and plenty others I've probably railed on in the past.

House of the Dead
Kill Bill v1 & 2
X-Men 3
Anything by M Shyamalan
Men in Black 2
Both Fantastic 4 films

Oh god, Aeon Flux without a doubt. I think 'inability to live up to 1/100 of the original work' adds a couple of points there.

So League of Extrordinary Gentlemen too. Not just bad but above and beyond.

So yeah, Wicker Man too, although that might be worth it for Mega Wicker Man.

... and Tamatha, don't bother. The only reason #3 is better than number #1 and #2 is that even Lucas isn't a hack enough director to kill 100% of the drama of slaughtering Jedi children.

Revolutions had the really cool Smith/Neo battle at the end. Plus it ended the whole mess cold in its tracks, so you have to give it credit for that. Personally, I didn't think the sequels were that bad. They aren't on the same plain as the first, but they weren't abysmal.

AI

I'll throw PS I Love You into the mix. Usually I can forgive the romcoms for their cheesiness and be mildly entertained, but this movie pissed me the f*ck off. Who loves/grieves like that? Who believes Hilary Swank as a romcom heroine? It was just all kinds of wrong.

*deep breath*

The Hottie and the Nottie, The Adventure of Pluto Nash, SuperBabies: Baby Geniuses 2, Little Man, Son of the Mask, From Justin to Kelly, Norbit, Daddy Day Camp, Taxi,and Freddy Got Fingered.

Thank you. This experience has helped my mouth and brain understand what my butthole goes through when I get the runs.

The Lady in the Water
the Mummy movies
both Matrix sequels
Freddy Got Fingered

Posted by: annoyingmouse at March 11, 2009 3:52 PM

Annoyingmouse, you sly dog you...you're trying to show us there's a pattern in those movies you typed in caps aren't you? Well, I'm on to your plan, and I'm "hip" to your "groove"...those titles have a lot of E's and T's, and in some cases R's in there. Yeah, I decoded your little message...kinda like that new movie KNOWING, starring Nic Cage. I tell ya, when he stops making good movies I'll stop seein' them, am I right? *Enthusiastically offers high five*

Transformers. Can't forget to list that childhood destroying turd.

Gee annoyingmouse, I'm trying hard to see what you DID THERE with the NICOLAS CAGE movies. Hehehe.

Faradir...if I didn't know he was an LOTR character, I would have thought he was a Marx Brother punchline.

"Where is he?"

"Where's who?"

"Where's my fiance?"

"I believe he's in the next room."

"That's not him, that's Faradir."

"Far-a-dear, but no closer to your heart."

Just going off ones that I saw in theaters...
GHOST RIDER
NATIONAL TREASURE 2
The Spirit
Van Helsing.
And Mike Rowe, how can you say Juno is the worst of the aughts? Really? You might not like it but really? In the same caliber as any of the "- Movie" Movies?
Has anyone said Wild Hogs yet?

If we're going groupings, by actor/actress, then: Beverly Hills Chihuahua, Fever Pitch, Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle, Charlie's Angels.

The Sweetest Thing
Seemed like the whole thing was ad-libbed, and shittily at that. Furthermore, I... IT WAS ON CABLE AND I WAS SICK, THAT'S WHY! LIKE I'D FUCKING PAY MONEY TO SEE IT! JESUS... you know me better than that... Anyhow, the movie sucked stale ass. Even the goofy whatchamafrick during the credits was reta...I WATCHED IT BECAUSE I FUCKING FELT LIKE IT, THAT'S WHY! I RECEIVED NO PLEASURE FROM IT! COME ON!

Fifteen Minutes
Awful. Absolutely God-awful. Everything about this movie sucked. Edward Burns sucked, De Niro sucked, Frasier sucked, the Czechoslovakians super-sucked, etc...

Gummo
I don't give a shit - it's three years out of the running, but it deserves mention. Gummo is a piece of shit. The movie needs to have it's plot woven into the DNA of a test-tubed baby smoothie consisting of Sean Hannity's conservative spunk and whatever Ann Coulter has flopping around in her uterine abyss, go through a rapid-aging process and then shot in the face via shotgun on Harmony Korine's front yard... Fuck Gummo. Worst movie this decade, last decade, forever and ever, amen. Period.

I'd thought that it was Battlefield Earth, hands down, until I had the misfortune of catching BloodRayne on Sci-Fi a few months ago. It was like I was caught in some obsessive-sado-masochistic loop--I'd watch for about five minutes, be so disgusted that I'd turn the channel, but then switch back again after another couple of minutes. I watched the entire movie this way. My husband was considering having me committed, especially because I kept protesting, "No, this is seriously the worst movie I have ever seen. It HAS to get better."

dammitjanet - I have to disagree on all Lindsey Lohan films, as Mean Girls came out in 2004, and I genuinely liked that one.

And Mike R. I had forgotten about Employee of the Month and I kind of wish you hadn't reminded me that I wasted, not only my valuable money, but also time, to see that crap in the theatre. I plead complete and total ignorance and a moment of absolute weakness for why I thought, even for a second, I should see that movie.

I again second Aeon Flux, my god that movie was asinine. Actually, I second everything on Dustin's list.

Also, don't forget Deuce Bigallow: European Gigalo "The Greatest Film of our Generation". In addition, I'd like to second some of the Eloquent's nominations:

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Spy Kids 3D
Little Man
Daddy Day Camp
Bangkok Dangerous
From Justin To Kelly
27 Dresses
Both Fantastic 4 films
Farce of the Penguins
The Love Guru

These next nominations are all my own:

Anything made by Uwe Boll
All the Movie Movies
The upcoming Not Another Not Another Movie
Pokemon: The Movie 2000 (Yes, that did get a theatrical release. Yes, I did take my parents to see that, I was 9, how could I resist.)
The Heartbreak Kid
The Covenant
Delta Farce
Balls of Fury
Cats and Dogs
Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa
Shark Tale
Home on the Range
The Santa Clause 3
The Benchwarmers

How many films are going to be on the Worst of the Aught's list? Can there be a seperate list for most disappointing films? Here are some nominees:

Transformers 1 and 2
The Pirates of the Caribbean sequels
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Atlantis: The Lost Empire

Sorry I carried on for so long, but a lot of shit has come out this decade in addition to the gems. My only request is that more kids movies are on the Worst of the Aught's list. Some real shit is made for kids.

Pearl Harbor needs to be up near the top as well. Can't believe I almost forgot that one. I'm digging back through years of repressed nights here.

Derailed

Holy GOD Pearl Harbor was bad. I had to hide my best friend's car keys, lest he jam them into his carotid.

George, why in the fuck did you go see all those movies? No wonder you're so down on current cinema!

I'm choosy and generally like everything I go to see in one way or another. I only saw "Battlefield Earth" much later and through the Rifftrax filter but that is one impressively misguided movie. Wow. It really deserves applause for its achievement.

Superhero Movie. I'm pretty sure that was the one I was brutally forced into seeing.

Black Snake Moan? Sure it has its flaws, but one of the worst? I mean, even if the rest of the movie completely sucked, that soundtrack... yowza.

I second Optimus Rhyme nominations of Ghost Rider and Wild Hogs. I've seen Ghost Rider, which is the worst superhero movie and Nicholas Cage movie ever made; but I haven't seen Wild Hogs. I actually kind of want to see it, because it looks like the worst movie of all time.

I've also seen Van Helsing, which was awesome when I saw it, but it really doesn' take much to entertain a 12 year old. If I saw it now, I'd probably laugh my ass off, so I'll go ahead and second it. I now realize the idiocy of Frankenstein, the Wolfman, Dr. Jeckel, and Dracula
suffering from poorly done CGI in the same movie.
One person has seen it, Optimus. John Williams, a critic for this site. It really deserves a spot.

I'd also like to second my own nomination of The Heartbreak Kid, which features Ben Stiller in another romantic gross out that has an actual queef in the middle of the film, and Carlos Mencia as a supporting actor. I'd also like to bring up Kangaroo Jack. It's the worst movie Christopher Walken has ever been in, even worse than Balls of Fury.

Oh, and for those of you curious, Home on the Range is a Disney movie starring Rosanne as a talking cow. It get's worse from there.

Yes, Tracer. I also missed Witless Protection.

Let's not forget the sparkliest of movierrhea, Twilight.

OMG.

How could I forget

THE BUCKET LIST???

*removes katana from sheath...*

I nominate:

-An American Carol
-Star Wars Episode II
-Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
-Talledega Nights
-Syriana
-The Assassination of Jesse James
-Meet the Spartans
-Lady in the Water
-Poseidon

Can I still nominate [i]Bicentennial Man[/i], even though it missed by a year?

The last two Star Wars movies are a shoe-in. I mean, they almost had to get better after the first one, but then they just. Kept. Getting. Worse.

Here's a few:
27 Dresses
Alex and Emma (saw this twice...ugh)
Evan Almighty
Spiderman 3

Meet the Spartans
Dragon Wars
Spiderman 3
The Mummy 3
Christmas with the Kranks (I didn't even watch it, I just huddled in the corner with my laptop while my mother watched, and I still went blind in my right eye)
Bloodrayne
Resident Evil 3
Chronicles of Riddick (Really? No one has mentioned this yet?)
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
And that one movie with Karl Urban as an Indian fighting Vikings, I can't remember the name but it was fucking ridiculous.

And let me go ahead and add on the live-action dragonball movie, because I already know that it'll induce spontaneous abortions all around America by fetuses too ashamed to be raised by the fuckwit mother who paid to see it.

I think I covered this during the best movies of the aught. Shit. Well, that's why God invented Copy-Paste.

Worst

5. Bratz
4. The Hottie and the Nottie
3. Epic Movie
2. Witless Protection
1. Norbit

Yay for Ctrl + C! And Ctrl + V!

Yay for Ctrl + C! And Ctrl + V!

Whereas Godtopus invented Alt + F4.

I'm only listing the ones I've seen. There is plenty of repugnant shit that most likely is worse than this list but I just can't bring myself to waste 90-120 minutes to find out.

Hostel
Gothika
Battlefield Earth (but this is truly one of the funniest movies ever made)
Jeepers Creepers 1 and 2
Cabin Fever
Spider-Man 3
X-Men 3
League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Blade Trinity
Shark Tale
Mystic River
The Day After Tomorrow
Alone in the Dark (also pretty damn funny)
Hostel (so awful it's on here twice)

Man, looking over the lists some of you truly sit through some atrocious shit. I thought my list was bad but I can't even compete with some of this offal.

Yeah 'Twilight' will go down in history as the most unintentionally hilarious movie of all time.

Swordfish

You know what would be a good list?

Most Depressing movies of the aughts.

If you're going with 'most [whatever] of the aughts' it would be cool to do something like the AFI did with it's 100 lists. Best comedies, best romances, etc.

Alone in the Dark - Tara Reid as an archaeologist. A bad ass protagonist whose apartment looks like page 32 of the Pier 1 catalog. Uh-huh.
Glitter - OH MY GOD HATE
I Know Who Killed Me - played like someone had just figured out that there were crazy filters he could use in Final Cut and then decided to USE THEM ALL.
Snakes on a Plane - Wasn't nearly as fun-bad as it wanted to be. Just bad.
Mamma Mia! - I'm already predisposed to hating movies with exclamation points in their titles, but this was just offensive to all the actors involved. And I guess it was also offensive to humans.

Not to nullify my comment, but was I the only one who thought Aeon Flux wasn't half bad? A mess, for sure, but at least an interesting mess.

Good to know!
And thousands of sincere and serious tall people I met on
___T a l l m i n g l e . C om___ are the most amazing people I ever met! they care nothing but real love and chemistry! that's what we are looking for in today's world! :-)

I can't fully participate, because I make a point of not watching bad films. Every once in a while one will sneak in front of me for whatever reason, but I don't see enough of them to offer any authoritative list. Hell, Catwoman was one of the most fun times I've ever had at a theater for its unintentional hilarity. We MST3Ked the hell out of that thing. (We had permission from the only other few people in the theater.)

That said, I'll go ahead and nominate Tideland. I'm a Terry Gilliam fan, and I suppose I recognize some artistic merits, but that was one of the most painful viewing experiences of my life.

I'll also go with Transformers, the movie about robots battling each other that only had about fifteen minutes of robots battling each other in its two-hours-plus running time. The rest was devoted to flat characters and inane humor.

3000 Miles To Graceland was absolutely horrid, but I watched that on TBS, so I don't know if I reveled in its crappy glory.

I understand that expectations are allowed to be factored in, but it really does not make much sense to me to ignore that some artistry and attention to detail went into Attack of the Clones and just lump that in with something like The Love Guru. (And, yes, I was disappointed in Attack of the Clones.)

I'd like to subtract one vote above from The Matrix Reloaded, if that's allowed. Better than the original. It's the third one that ruined the series.

One other thing for Inaras: I've defended Signs against this argument many times and I dislike the ending myself for other reasons, but in that movie it wasn't simply the case that the aliens were allergic to water. M. Night was also going for some sort of religious metaphor that justified their defeat (i.e., the power of faith), which you might think is just as dumb.

I also nominate First Daughter. That film is worth seeing for the laughably amateur use of a miniature model for shots of the White House.

What!?! No Eragon?? That show was S.H.I.T.T.Y!!! It was a waste of two excellent actors! I wanna know who blackmailed Malkovich and Jeremy Irons to be in that movie! Who?

Toss in King Arthur and Fantastic 4 (both parts!)
And just out of pure bad mind Freddy vs Jason and Alien vs Predator...and 30 Days of Night.

figgy: Indeed, I have been "pwnd". I feel great shame. CURSE YOU, BRANDED!

How has no one mentioned Domino yet? I know that there are very few people that actually saw it, but man, that movie sucked and sucked hard.

what was that uwe boll movie that made stephen dorff unfuckingfuckable? remember, tara reid was smart because she wore glasses? that one.

*blink*

I'm not even sure why I read through that entire thread...there couldn't have been more than a couple of movies (Juno, Crash) named that I've seen, and like Jay I'm choosy and try to do my research before investing time -- never mind the money -- in a flick. Yeah, there's the occasional abomination foisted upon me by someone else (The House Bunny -- there, I have my very own nominee), but I think I'll join tt_marie in simply stepping around the cesspool rather than wading into it to find the ripest turd...

Al of you people listing several movies, if you can not narrow your pick to one movie it's obviously not the worst of the Aughts.

You know what would be another good list?

Movies that pissed you off the most of the aughts.

Anyway, Ergon gets my vote as the only movie that I have been eternally grateful that a little kid talked all through it, because I quickly realized he was more entertaining than the damn movie.

Matrix Revolutions
Catwoman
Meet The Spartans
Another Gay Movie
Doom
House Of Wax
Elektra
Bad Boys 2
Dumb and Dumberer
Boat Trip
The Country Bears
Ballistic Ecks Vs Sever
Whats The Worst That Could Happen
Haunted Castle (IMAX)

All of the above movies definitely make me want to poke my fucking eyes out with a Bic pen. But I thought we all agreed on the worst movie of the Aughts by now, weather we've seen it or not (I for one haven't):

Paul motherfucking Blart

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Future War
Star Wars 1-3

Totally forgot about "King Kong"!!!!!! Definately a piece o' shit!

You're a big man for fessing up to falling for it, Jeremy. I found out about it originally by getting tricked myself. The cycle of life continues. Now I owe you some spooning time.

My small sample size for the top spot would be between Battlefield Earth for horrendous acting and dialogue combined with source material penned by the engineer of the crazy train, L Ron Hubbard, and Phantom Menace for Lucas' part in not even beginning to approach the admittedly engorged expectations of the Star Wars fans.

Christ. Talk about Sophie's Choice.

Captivity

There. I said it. Closest I've come to a 1/10 in the 00's.

The Hottie & the Nottie

Maybe I'm just too visually oriented, but I find it hard to second some of these choices, even when the movie is truly bad, when said movies at least look interesting and have consistent action/movement to keep my attention (sufficient sex, violence, etc.)

So, by those standards, Chronicles of Riddick, Matrix Revolutions, Aeon Flux, League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, and Speed Racer pass muster, because I find them watchable, despite being godawful messes.

But Catwoman, yeah, among the worst, for being too boring and stupid to make a scantily clad martial arts wielding Halle Berry interesting enough to at least watch.

Love Guru...a comedy with no laughs and no sense.

And Kingdom of the Crystal Skull for having virtually no entertainment and being an anchor to drag down an otherwise solid franchise.

The last half hour of Watchmen

stryker1121, high five for sure on that sentiment. Although, I cannot begin to agree with you about Kill Bill vols 1 & 2.

and Sex And The (Fucking) City. How the hell did I not think of that one. Easily the worst piece of shit in the fucking history of cinema- if only for the faux glamorous bullshit that movie seems to infect in the minds of women everywhere. Oh yeah, and I'm going to assume that every aspect of the film making was complete garbage.

And Sarah Jessica Parker looks like a horse. Who in the hippie hell decided she was supposed to be even a little attractive?

As other posters mentioned, I veer away from anything starring Hilton, Lohan etc, directed by Bay & Boll, don’t bother with the entire torture porn genre* nor anything ending in …Movie, so it’s hard to nominate a film that genuinely deserves to be called the worst. I also have an aversion to films of the “so bad it’s hilarious” variety, hence I never saw Battlefield Earth and others of it’s ilk. Basically that leaves films of semi respectable production quality that, while a cut above the excreta mentioned above, failed to live up to expectations or even made me actively angry.

So:
SW prequels 1 and 2 (3 at least attempted to achieve the levels of tragic pathos I’m sure Lucas envisioned but mostly failed to capture).
Matrix 2 and 3: followed up the arresting premise of the original (and it’s terroristic overtones) with 5 hours of self indulgent meh. I keep trying to tell myself the films were the result of a GWOT-enforced rewrite, but everything the Wachowskis have done since has convinced me they are just pompous windbags with an fx budget.
Lost in Translation. Caught the hype, saw the film… and spent 2 hours wondering when the genius was going to kick in.
Spidey 3- 1 and 2 did good business, so why then the fuck did the producers think they could “improve” it with MORE VILLIANS, MORE LAUGHS, MORE FIGHTS!!! A bigger sausage isn’t better when you bulk it out with sawdust
Van Helsing. Set itself up as a dumb movie to begin with, yet still managed to underestimate the intelligence of it’s audience
But if I had to nominate one, “what the FUCK are you doing!!?!?!??!” film, it has to be Deathproof. One awesome chase and a decent soundtrack does not compensate for a cast full of aggressively irritating one-note characters telling endless stories of marginal relevance to the plot, then screeching variations on the word “fuck” at each other for the rest of the time. I don’t care if it made QT nostalgic for the stick floored rat-holes he used to watch b-grade cinema in, he was preaching to a very small choir.

*With one exception: High/Haute Tension, the movie that killed the TP genre before it got underway. A grinding study in pointless sadism, dumb-fantasy psychology and dodgy gender politics, gosh-darn blinking buggeryfuck I hated that film

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH, so late to the game. I fucking hate being a lawyer sometimes. It totally gets in the way of my Pajiba posting.

Here are my additions/seconds:

1. Little Man. Fucking awful.
2. Norbit. Also fucking awful.
3. Forgetting Sarah Marshall. For one moment, it almost made me forget how much I love Kristen Bell. I was more entertained by the couple who was actually fucking a few rows behind us in the almost empty theatre.
4. The Royal Tenenbaums. Pretentious, overhyped, and hated even more for the laud bestowed upon it by the kind of guys who wear scarves in warm weather. And I fucking hate Ben Stiller.
5. The Passion of the Christ. God, what a downer.
6. America's Sweethearts. Quite possibly one of the worst movies ever made and an example of why bestiality just isn't that funny.
7. Pinata: Survival Island. This almost makes the "so bad, it's good" list. Why, Nicholas Brendon, why?
8. Feardotcom. I don't even have words.
9. Signs and The Village. The only person I hate more than M. Night Shamalamadingdong is Mel Gibson, so I had to call this one a tie.
10. Le Divorce. Le depressing.

Mind you, I have many, many more, but I know no one reads past 10. And I couldn't even count I Heart Huckabees or Blades of Glory, since I felt I should only include movies I watched more than 10 minutes of before turning it off to watch paint dry.

_______ Movie, repeated as neccessary...

No need to overthink it. Drop 'em on a flag pole and hoist each page of each script up on barbed wire.

The Benchwarmers: Oh holy God JESUS CHRIST.

I don't really disagree with what ya'll have put up on the board, but Lady in the Water was just about as close as I'll ever get to eating an honest to goodness triple decker shit sandwich. The dill pickle wedge on the side and the chips in the middle were hardly distracting enough from the fact that you didn't have to just take a bite, no no no, you had to eat the entire entree and pick the bits out of your teeth with the frilly toothpick. The faces of the people walking out of the theater was a mixture of bewilderment and bemusement. Like they were saying "Did we just bend over and let that little smarmy assnozzle take turns drilling us?"

I know Battlefield Earth is a festering pus filled boil on all of our collective movie loving asses. But M. Night couldn't be more full of shit than the outhouse pit after Memorial Day. Giamatti was so fucked in that movie, you could just see it in his face - 'Dear Jesus, am I really saying these things?' After that little Smeagal clone yelled 'Cut' Giamatti must have fell to his knees like a skater who'd just been craned in the knee - 'WHY, WHY WHY?!?!?!'

Ghostrider
Captivity
Crash
Norbit
Little Man
Gigli
Love Guru
Indy IV
Kill Bill Vol I
Phantom Menace

the new Wicker Man is infinitly more entertaining than the original ... it's worth watch watching just for the "OH NO. NOT THE BEEES! MY EYEEEEESSS!!! NOT THE BEEEEEES!" scene, but Cage is hammier than ham and bacon sandwich made with 2 porkchops throughout.

same with Battlefield Earth, between the awful writing, the laughable acting, inexplicable makeup and costumes, nausea-inducing camera angles, and general all-around insanity, only a person with no soul could fail to love the hell out of that ridiculous train wreck.

but the movies above? ugh. venal, vile products of the hollywood machine, souless, crass, ignorant and greedy.

If by Faradir you mean Faramir, he was also in my only nominee for the title,
since it was so bad it counts as a whole top 5: Australia.

Find Me Guilty (Okay, so maybe the expectations were low, but I had to sit through the entire thing and I WILL HAVE MY VENGEANCE)

300 (An ode to fascism if there ever was one)

Van Helsing (no explanation needed)

Identity (I went into it with no strong expectations, started to get into the story, and then suddenly it's all happening in some guy's head. It makes me want to cut a bitch just thinking about it)

The Matrix sequels (obviously)

Children of Men (partly because of the hype, but, seriously, WTF was that?)

Chronicles of Riddick (wow, it's only the second Vin Diesel movie on the list)

Pearl Harbor (so bad I've managed to completely repress it! Yay!)

I'm sure there were lots more that I didn't watch, thankfully.

The little remembered Ben Stiller/Jennifer Aniston vehicle "Along Came Polly" comes straight to mind. I had the misfortune of catching that on a transatlantic flight. I nearly gouged my eyes out.

Also, "Whipped," with Amanda Peet. Worst. Movie. EVER!

Shall We Dance? No. Shall we slap Susan Sarandon for appearing in this? Yes.

A Lot Like Love

Transporter 3

...and worst Pajiba rec of the decade?

August Rush, without a shadow of a doubt. I recently picked this one up on dvd on the strength of the review here and was absolutely staggered how bad it was on every single level. I really like Keri Russell, thought the kid was great in Finding Neverland and don't even mind Robin Williams but hot damn, this was the biggest piece of badly acted, poorly written sap I have ever had the misfortune of sitting though. And don't even get me STARTED on the ending -

*SPOILER!*

He spends the whole stupid film looking for his parents and it ends with them just staring at him (among a crowd of thousands) as he performs on stage, and he stops, and he "sees them", and "just knows." I assume. As it ends then. GAH.

I'll watch almost anything. TBS is especially good for this.
But a movie I sought out to watch and abso-fucking-lutely hated was Closer. It was two hours of suck, and not in a good way, like Con Air.

Spidey 3 was the biggest disappointment of the decade IMO. #3 dumped the pathos and emotion of the first two movies and turned the franchise into a Universal Studios ride. You can boil down my disdain for the film to one scene-- Apropos of nothing, Venom and Sandman randomly meet in an alley, and agree to form a tag team to kill Spider-Man. That's just lazy...

Come on, is Juno really one of the worst? Sure, it can be pretty hipstery, but it's a great god damn movie.

IT WAS NOT GREAT. See, that's why I seconded it, because everyone and their unborn fetus went around saying how amaaaazing it was and how much I would like it. So when I finally got around to watching it, I thought I would like it. I wanted to like it. And I hated it. I didn't even want to finish. I didn't laugh, I didn't emotionally connect with the characters, and I didn't care what happened, so what was the freaking point? At least with Superhero Movie I knew what I was getting into.

Allowances: I kind of connected with Bateman until he turned creepy like I was hoping he wouldn't, and Juno's parents had one or two good lines.

expectations do count. Cast, director, and hype should be taken into consideration.

xXx

I hated that fucking movie!

even if it were executed flawlessly, it would still be a horrible movie due to the very premise.

And there's no one else to blame if you give it your time.

I keep looking at that picture and saying "Lee-verage!" in my head. Along with the Rifftrax guys a very enjoyable aspect of the movie was a friend saying "I'm sorry" for Forest Whitaker every time the camera cut to him.

I can't believe there are so few mentions of Captivity in this comment section.

I think that's an excellent indication of the intelligence, sophistication and good taste of this crowd.

Agree with much of what has been said already and I am feeling grateful that I have seen so few of the movies mentioned.

Where I got caught was in fulfilling my fatherly duty to see crap films with my daughter. I submit:

Barnyard (They made a damned show on Nickelodeon out of that?)
The Shaggy Dog remake starring whats-his-name, the "men are apes" guy that I ten-fold hate.

Indiana Jones 4

I agree with this list for sure:
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Spy Kids 3D
Little Man
Bangkok Dangerous
From Justin To Kelly
27 Dresses
Both Fantastic 4 films
Farce of the Penguins
The Love Guru

Although the one on here I think that gets a hard time is Daddy Day Camp. It was made for 5 million direct to video originally which ended up going theatrical at the last minute. You can't stack up a tiny 5 million dollar movie to the big budget flops like Little Man and LXG. Kids movies are hard to bag on cause they usually are all bad!

Vanilla Sky

Hulk (1st one)

Lost in Translation

Godzilla 2000

Come on everyone! Take a stand against *****y torture porn.

Captivity
I Know Who Killed Me
Anything Nic Cage
Anything M Night Shamalamadingdong
(Blank) Movie
Pretty much any remake ever

I do not envy your job. Good luck narrowing it down!

The Core. That movie is as hard to watch as the "Unobtanium?!" the goddamn ship in the movie is made of. Nuclear weapons will save the Earth...yeah!

Sorry Folks, but, HANDS DOWN, the worst of the decade was Grudge. What an abomination. Sarah Michelle Geller lost huge life points by appearing (note I did not say acting) in that pathetic excuse for ... well frankly there IS no excuse for it.

I felt like suing the producers for stealing 2 hours of my life I can never get back!

Super hyped and just as plain pathetic. The sheer awfulness of the movie gives me the creeps the movie failed to generate. I still have nightmares that I actually paid money to see it.. (shudder)

I have to constantly tell my wife I love her, because, after taking her to that pile of dung, she naturally assumed I had come to despise her.