Pajiba

The most painful of all time, mainly due to it being the last movie he made before his death:

Raul Julia - Street Fighter.

It still hurts to think about.

So, can I go ahead and name someone before they totally screw the pooch? Because I read the spoiler/very possible ending for the new Terminator. Based on that: Christian Bale, why you gotta go and do that Terminator business??? WHY YOU TREAT ME SO BAD, CHRISTIAN?? WHY?!?

I could take an easy one and say Cuba Gooding Jr, but I thought he sucked ass in Jerry McGuire in the first place...

Ed Norton in "Death to Smoochy"... (crossing fingers for the Hulk flick)

Oh Julie! I almost put Murray in Garfield too. That was shitastic of him. Unfortunately, I have a pre-schooler that wants to watch A Tale (or is it Tail?) of Two Kitties every so often. Blech.

Chiwetel Ejiofor in that new Roland Emmerich abomination. I hope he's doing it for the money. I hope he's doing it for a hell of a lot of money.

Also when I found out Will Smith turned down the lead role in "The Matrix" to be in "Wild Wild West." That was a kick to the goolies.

Chris Walken in most of his roles for the last 15 years. Please note - Joe Dirt is totally excused because he ROCKED in that. I totally understand part of his appeal is the appearance of him in at least 2-3 films annually. But the ping-pong movie? Seriously? I love you Chris...please stop. Just stop.

WORD Nicole.

And how could I forget the biggest heartbreak of all because I've seen so much better...Steve (motherfucking) Martin. From The Jerk, Roxanne, Little Shop, The Man With Two Brains, The Three Amigos (shut up, I love it)...to Cheaper By the Dozen 1 AND 2? No no no.

Get back to being awesome, you gloriously grey-haired genius.

Sarah Michelle Gellar in every movie she has ever made. EVER.

Angela Bassett in Meet the Browns. She was Tina Turner, damnit! I refuse to acknowledge that the film exists.

Val Kilmer in Batman Forever. Despite the popular opinion, I think this is the worst of the franchise. The low point is when Val asks Chase Meridian (Nicole Kidman) if she's "trying to get under his cape." Then he fucking grins. I wanted to cry.

Everyone in How to Make an American Quilt. My God, was there any point to that piece of shit movie?

Skittimus, I loved Death to Smoochy. Yes, I admit it.

The entire cast of Evening. A movie must be really bad if it has Toni Collette, Meryl Streep, Claire Danes, Patrick Wilson, Vanessa Redgrave, and Glenn Close and it still sucks. All of them have been outstanding in at least one thing, so how they got it wrong is beyond me.
William H. Macy in Wild Hogs. The one actor of the lot who still shines with talent and he went and did freaking Wild Hogs. Him and Marissa Tomei.

Audrey Tautou in The Davinci Code, bring back Amélie!

Charlton Heston in the Ten Commandments......What a bad move. Er

Oof, greer, I forgot about The Pink Panther. Bad Martin. BAD!

I'm adding Kate Winslet in The Holiday.

Twig, Twister was a vortex of suck. The best thing to come out of Twister was a cheesy pinball game.

Meryl Streep in Prime. That movie was not Meryl Streep-caliber. And she perpetually looked like she wanted to smack Uma Thurman, but then again, who wouldn't?

Good call on Raul Julia in Street Fighter, TK - although I do find the sight of Gomez Addams ranting about "BISON DOLLARS!" and laying the smackdown on an even-more-incoherent-than-usual JCVD perversely entertaining - so much so that a copy of the DVD does find itself coming into play when sufficient quantities of booze and an appropriate number of inebriated house-guests are present.

Tim Robbins...Nothing to Lose.

You were Merlin! You flew with Maverick! What are you doing in a Martin Lawrence film.

I'll chorus the Death to Smoochy love.

Also, realizing that The Monster from Young Frankenstein was also Raymond's dad from that unspeakably awful show was like stepping in one of life's metaphorical goose turds. Peter Boyle, why?!

Morgan Freeman, Steve Carrell, and Lauren Grahmn in Evan Almighty.

"Maybe the next comment diversion should be comment diversions, yes?"

Are you insane, Stu? There's no telling what effect a recursive Comment Diversion could have on the fabric of the universe! What if we went off-topic? It may rend a yawning chasm in the space-time continuum, awakening dread Cthulhu, releasing the zombie hordes and sending all of us racing to our kitchens to yell at the oven!

Peter Boyle gets a lifetime pass from me because we went to the same college.

Michael Keaton was the hottest Batman of the original three. But then he went and made Jack Frost.

greer- I don't think Jodie Foster was in Wild Wild West, (and I just double checked on IMDb). Do you mean that western that also starred Mel Gibson (the title of which I refuse to look up)?

Also, I've gotta say that Nicholas Cage used to be a great actor - but he has too many bad films to list here.

I have to say, there are quite a few for me as well. I mean, would it fucking KILL you to call me and ask my advice before you sign up for these gigs? Inconsiderate bastards...

Colin Farrel: Alexander. I'd rather watch an elephant violate a mouse.

Rutger Hauer - Anything and everything he ever did after Blind Fury: (I'm looking at YOU Buffy the Vampire Slayer).

Angelina Jolie - A Mighty Heart: A mighty snoozefest...wake me up when you gain 25 pounds and some common sense.

Everyone involved - Ocean's 12: Seriously. WHAT.THE.FUCK.PEOPLE?!

Al Pacino...seriously, Gigli? 88 Minutes? Al's got money...what's the excuse?

I once read a kind of sad article on Walken where he basically said, "I don't have any hobbies, or interests other than acting, and I get bored easily. So I take whatever crosses my path."

Whatever. I love the man, and thus forgive him.

Casey Affleck
Halle Berry
Eliza Dushku
Steve Zahn

What on earth were they doing in Race the mothereffing Sun? I'd mention Belushi, but he knew exactly what he was doing in that movie. Sucking.

Dennis Hopper in Super Freaking Mario.

MrC, I think it's understood that Eddie's got no credibility left. He somehow fell into an Oscar nomination last year, then immediately pissed it away with Norbit.

And, what's next? Meet Dave.

Joan Cusack in "Toys." I blame Robin Williams.

I know I should have dozens more, but there's only one I can think of at the moment: Christian Bale in Reign of Fire. Quite possibly the most unintentionally funny movie I've ever seen.

Woody Allen. And he gets more blame than anyone else on this list befcause he MADE these fucking movies.

Why, Woody? Why'd you have to cast yourself opposite Juliette Lewis in Husbands and Wives? She was a third your age!!! And Julia Roberts in Everybody says I love you? Seriously? You thought this was a believable casting decision? MOTHERFUCKING ELIZABETH SHUE????

greer and tamatha, that was Maverick.

There are so many disappointments of this sort that it's hard to know where to start. But what about absolutely everyone in The Day After Tomorrow? There's just no excuse for that movie.

TK, right there with you about Raul Julia. I wish he'd gotten to go out on almost anything else.

Certainly NO ONE'S favorite actor, & this probably leans more towards theater of the absurd than anything to do with movies, but who can deny the very worst, and longest, most depressing and dangerous performance of all time: George W. playing the 'president' for 8 straight years??!! God, that's gotta beat any miscasting in any role of any kind, at least in this century!

If Chris Walken's excuse is that he has no hobbies, I will happily nominate myself as his own personal hobby. Take that as you will...LOL.

Oh sh*t! I didn't mean the 'LOL' - I know how the use of that totally torks the Pajibans off! I tried to take it back but it was too late.

Sigh. Sorry. Please don't ban me. I meant it in good faith and all.

Colin Firth in What a Girl Wants, Hope Springs and The Last Legion. God, it kind of hurts to be a fan, doesn't it?

Jet Li, for Romeo Must Die. Not that I hate the movie itself (I might have watched it five times in a row when it came out - I have some serious Jet Li love). It's just that he was offered the role in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon that eventually went to Chow Yun Fat. And he turned it down for RMD. Legend has it that his wife was pregnant, and he took the close-to-home role to be with her, blah, blah, romance, romance... But I still can't forgive him.

Someone mentioned Cary Elwes, which reminded me...

Saw, Cary? I'm not saying you have to stick to one type of role forever, but you were Wesley! You were Robin Hood! What about Glory? That wasn't so bad, really. Now we need to see you sawing your leg off and rocking an uneven accent?

*sigh*

Oh, and Freddie Highmore in August Rush. I know he's but a wee lad, but don't taint the love I have for you by way of Finding Neverland.

This is old school, but going off the Raul Julia thing: Walter Matthau in Hanging Up. A celebrated actor's final film is some awful, rushed tripe with Meg Ryan, Diane Keaton & Lisa Kudrow. Even Dennis the Menace was better than that.

I was flipping out when someone mentioned Jodie Foster in Wild Wild West, but I re-read the posts. Thank God. She was still recovering from Nell.

Colin Firth, Pierce Bronsnan and Meryl Streep in Mama Mia, and it hasn't even come out yet.

Cate Blanchett in the latest 'Indiana Jones'. I smirked at the Ukranian mail-a-dominatrix act at first, but after 5 mins it was painful to watch. That last scene, wtf??

Also, I have to add Julie Andrews in both Princess Diaries (yeah, shhh) movies, purely from a nostalgic point of view. Why stick Mary Poppins in to play second fiddle to Anne bloody Hathaway and pelt her with jokes about being old & unhip while Anne & her mates are busy dancing to a montage of Hilary Duff or some other horseshit to prove their 'coolness'? (Ok, I may have been paying waaay too much attention, jesus christ.... )

Greer, I too think Ed Norton is the HOTNESS. Even when he played that motherf'ing deranged character in 'Primal Fear'...

Twister was one of the greatest movies ever made. Philip Seymour Hoffman would be nothing without it. Nothing.

Now to address the question at hand:

Signorney Weaver in Heartbreakers
Amy Adams in Cruel Intentions 2
Greg Kinnear and Matt Damon in Stuck on You
Paul Rudd in Over Her Dead Body
Paul Giamatti in Lady in the Water
Laura Linney in Congo

Gene Kelly in Xanadu, I love the movie but mainly because it is soooo horribly bad, he's just to good to be in such laughable company. Olivia Newton John and the guy from Warriors, HA!

Um, did everyone forget that Jason Lee did "Alvin and the Chipmunks?"

We are talking about otherwise good actors in not-so-hot movies, right? Ummm, hello? CATE BLANCHETT???? Oscar???? Indiana Fucking Jones??? You should have put her picture up there, too, Dustin, cause she looks like friggin' Natasha!!!

Most of the cast of the remake of "Stepford Wives" *shudder*

Brendan Fraser in.....anything other than Gods and Monsters. Ok, he is the exception. He has only done one good role.

Kevin Spacey, Superman Returns, K-Pax.

Did I, or did I not, suggest a diversion JUST YESTERDAY???

Duane- Hey! I liked Enemy Mine, so Louis Gossett Jr. has that after An Officer and a Gentleman. Of course, I can't think of anything decent that he's been in since then, and that makes me sad.

Sorry, people. I was wrong about Jodie Foster, she was in Maverick, not Wild Wild West. And I still haven't forgiven her. Thanks.

It is actually Kevin Kline who should be punished for Wild Wild West. (as well as Mr. Smith, mentioned above)

Although it is still difficult to separate the two movies in my mind, because I loved watching the re-runs of these shows on tv.

Smoochy was awesome. Where else can you see Vincent Schiavelli as a heroin-addicted children's show host and assassin?

My vote is for Ben Kingsley in A Sound of Thunder, That movie makes Bloodrayne look competent.

Doesn't the Edgar Wright/Slartibartfast work get Bill Nighy out of jail?

No?

Jeez, and people are always telling me that I'd actually like "Love, Actually".

Again:
I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE Irina Spalko.

I also liked Kevin Spacey's Lex Luthor. If someone's pissed because Superman didn't punch out Brainiac or Metallo, fine. I'll never sympathize, but fine. But dammit, that was a good Luthor.

what are you talking about? Iron Eagle is a masterpiece! ... At least it was when I was 8. I haven't seen it in 20 years... It's probably better that way

I said pretty much the same thing last week. Probably best just to listen to "One Vision" and "Gimme Some Lovin" and let the memory be.

Oh, thanks for reminding me, BWeaves! Stellan in "Mamma Mia". That does actually anger me.

Philip Seymour Hoffman in Along Came Polly

Nicole I also have deep and affecting love for Love Actually *blushes*. Also hate the Laura Linney parts. DON'T ANSWER THE PHONE, YOU IDIOT!!! You have the hottest man on the planet almost naked in your apartment---duh!! Your retarded brother is in a facility---he can wait while you get your freak on!!!! I love the bit about the secretary's legs being "like tree trunks." No, she's just normal...thank Godtopus. Anyway, you are not alone.

"looks like a baby finger...."

The really amazing thing about Michael Caine and Jaws IV is that he skipped accepting his Hannah And Her Sisters Oscar because of his obligation to shoot the movie that day.

TK, the most awful thing about Raul Julia and Street Fighter is that his M. Bison character explodes from the screen after the credits exclaiming that he'll be back. I couldn't help but morbidly laugh I was so incredulous to it.

Philip Seymour Hoffman was the only thing that was good about Twister. I remember not knowing who he was and thinking that he was talented when I saw it.

One defense of Rutger Hauer: his small role in Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind rocked. I also appreciated his "reverse reprisal" of the Blade-Runner-skull-crush in Sin City. And I've always considered Surviving The Game a guilty pleasure.

Anyway, I need to come up with a contribution...the problem is that I don't really go to movies for the actors. I'm more of a writer-director kind of guy, and all the actors will inevitably have their hits and misses.

Mentioning Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (and virtually anything Harrison Ford post-1994) is too easy.

Someone else already mentioned Ewan McGregor. I was especially appalled by that thing he made with Ashley Judd - Eye of the Beholder.

Tideland - one of the most painful viewing experiences of my life - had Jeff Bridges playing a corpse, but that was Terry Gilliam's fault.

You know who has really fallen off the map? Kevin Spacey. After American Beauty and LA Confidential, he was one of my favorite actors, and then he began to make some very mystifying choices (starting with the abominable Pay It Forward).

Joe Pesci in Moonwalker.

"Greer, I too think Ed Norton is the HOTNESS. Even when he played that motherf'ing deranged character in 'Primal Fear'..."

So, reesy. What you're saying is - it's okay that I find him hot in this movie? Should we split the therapy bill?

I forgive Julie Andrews just about anything. She's done her time. And she also shocked me horribly years ago when she made "S.O.B" and took off her top in that movie. That's right. Topless Julie Andrews. Take a minute and let that soak in. Mary Poppins tits. Can you dig it? Almost destroyed my childhood but I got over it.

Tamatha and Nicole:

I will give you that Love Actually had enormous potential and some really great story lines. But everything fell apart in the last 30 minutes. The kid's mad dash through post-911 Heathrow Airport? And the pile of suck that was the entire Hugh Grant/Martine McCutcheon Downing Street story line? It was an insult to all those wonderful actors (in that I don't include Grant who acted only in About a Boy so he belonged in this overly sentimental idiotic oeuvre).

I've read that John Wayne was absolutely, laughably horrendous in 'Gehngis Khan', but I've never watched an entire John Wayne film in my life, so I guess that's cheating a bit.

Also, 'Revolution' came close to killing Al Pacino's career way back when, but he hasn't done much to make up for it since, has he?

My vote is for Ben Kingsley in A Sound of Thunder, That movie makes Bloodrayne look competent.

But... but it had ape-lizards. APE-LIZARDS!!!

The correct title is just Jaws: The Revenge. No "IV" or anything in it. Fair point about actors -- including Caine and Walken -- who take whatever is offered them. I admire that work ethic and lament it at the same time.

Willem Dafoe in Body of Evidence. Oh, God, Willem, WHY?!

Taylor Kitsch in The Covenant. I know he was nobody then, but to see Tim Riggins in that crap-fest is downright painful.

Hee Tamatha, I was totally lying, I just wanted to see what that sentence would look like, since I'm pretty sure it's never been said before.

I DO however, no lying, love Jaws: The Revenge. The shark roars like a lion and nibbles on Mario van Peebles...two ingredients for one tasty cinematic treat.

[Hands in Pajiba membership card]
I loved Reign of Fire (mmm, Bale), Twister (Hilarious - let's just forget that Wesley was in it), and Love Actually. I'm a cheeseball at heart.

Why did Kevin Bacon have to be in "The Air I Breathe"?

It wasn't an amazing movie, but I wanted to jump into the screen and pull him out of it. It was soo overacted.

And why did Danny Masterson and Adam Brody have to be in Smiley Face?

My friend tried to make me watch it, I saw the preview and looked at him "like are you kidding me?????" Way to give us stoners a bad name! I admit I haven't seen much out of either one of those guys other than their respected TV shows. But why in the world would they take on this movie???

Pea it would take a lot more than that for you to need to hand in your Pajiba card.

First of all, there is the usual mumbo jumbo about valuing a diversity of opinions/tastes that makes this site what it is.

Second, I have already professed my love of Love Actually; I really enjoyed Twister when I saw it in the theatre (and other Pajibans have defended it too); and although I only saw parts of Reign of Fire (while at a bar no less), the more it gets mentioned on this site, the more I feel like I should see it and enjoy it's fantastic cheesiness.

And honey, I am so not handing over my Pajiba card, so you hold onto yours too.

"I read today that Andre Bragher is going to do a drama series with Ray Romano. Not even Homicide can make up for that shit. I am giving my tv to the volunteers of america and curling up in a corner to cry."

LIES! You take that back and say you're sorry! This is not happening!

I have warned you people about TK and Reign of Fire.

If only Peter Sellers had died a little sooner, his last movie would have been Being There. Instead, it was Fu Manchu.

Late to the party as usual, but I nominate the entire cast of Space Cowboys. Donald Sutherland, James Garner, Clint Eastwood, and Tommy Lee Jones...oh, and Marcia Gay Harden! WTF were they thinking?! Terrible, terrible movie (that'll I'll get sucked into if it's on the tube).

Tim Robbins in "Howard the Duck." Hee hee

This is from the top of the thread, but Julie, it took me a minute to figure out what you meant by "Viggo goo" because my mind instantly went to a dirty place. Which brightened up my crappy afternoon, so thanks!

Love Actually annoyed the shit out of me except for Bill Nighy because I love him no matter what he does (POTC included).

The one that comes to mind for me is why is Eugene Levy in the damn American Pie movies?? I can give him a pass for the first one because while not great, at least it was the original and he was hilarious. But what's he still doing in the fucking Naked Mile?? Even Jason Biggs didnt come back for that shit. Christopher Guest needs to give him a good stern talking to. Or write another movie for him to be in at least.

Robert Duvall: Days of Thunder

James Earl Jones: the Best of the Best (Series)

Jane Fonda: Monster-in-Law

Clint Eastwood: Tightrope

Carla Gugino: Spy Kids (Series)

Robert Duvall, Giovanni Ribisi and Christopher Eccleston in "Gone in Sixty Seconds."

Wait a minute...

Where the HELL is my Pajiba membership card? I pay my dues like everyone else.

Another upcoming-attraction suggestion, how about roughly half the cast of He's Just Not That Into You or whatever the hell it's called? (The other half I wouldn't expect to know better)

Ginnifer Goodwin? Jennifer Connolly?? I also thought Drew Barrymore had learned better. Hell, I'd even include post-Gigli Ben Affleck. Yeesh.

Since I'm too tired to have a thought of my own, I must agree with Sigourney Weaver in "Heartbreakers"! What WAS she doing in that movie?

Around my house we call these films "Boat Payments."

Ms. McGillicuddy, Mr. Nonymous and I will turn to each other and say, "Whathisname must have bought a boat."

Word on the Colin Firth "What a girl wants" thing, though I did kind of like that Caroline Bingley was his initial love interest. He.

Also, word on almost the entire cast of "Love Actually." I think that only Keira Knightly and her stupid overacting underbite belonged in that movie (of course, Bill Nighy made his part fabulous, he just belonged in a slightly different, much better interpretation of the overall concept).

Toni Collette for that horrible movie with the girl from My Big Fat Greek Wedding-hated that movie (actually both of those movies).

Maggie Smith in the Potter Movies-I actually like her more than Gary Oldman, for the most part. This just seems embarrassing.

Paul Bettany in just about everything he's been in. Come on, you're better than that, Paul. Come over here and I will give you some confidence. Bring Jennifer if you want...

Tim Spall, David Thewlis, Jim Broadbent

Are there any of the Mike Leigh men who haven't been in a Harry Potter movie yet? .

That's not a knock, I love all the people David Heyman's able to round up. Sure, that's not how I envisioned Gilderoy Lockhart, but I like what Branagh did with it nonetheless (one of my favorite bits: when Umbridge interrupts dinner to make her improptu speech, Maggie Smith, off to the side and out of focus, is giving a full power "is this bitch shitting me?!". Some may say they're slumming, but the pros aren't being lazy in those movies).

With David Tennant covered they have to get Pegg and Frost in there somewhere and finally get Frost on Doctor Who (after all, Jessica Stevenson's gotten in both).

Fulfill my fanboy casting wishes, Warner-Moffat!

I think Alan Cumming just keeps working too, it'd be exhausting to get disappointed by almost every single job. I do like his Scarecrow though.

Ralph Fiennes--Maid in Manhattan. Why? WHY? WHY? WHY?

Helen Mirren--Teaching Mrs. Tinkle. I am pretty sure someone was blackmailing her.

Twig, I read a Time magazine article where Will Smith flat out apologized for making Wild Wild West. He said something along the line that he owed the fans an apology for that, it was just a bad movie. I admire the courage it takes to so publicly own up to a mistake.

And to add my two cents, I nominate Kevin Spacey in KPAX. I saw it only because he was in it (and my friend at the time was nursing a huge crush on Spacey and made me watch The Usual Suspects weekly). I no longer buy the "oh so-and-so is in it, it can't be that bad" arguement because that got me suckered into Wild Wild West as well (come on, Kenneth Branagh is on it, and he's a Shakespearean actor). I will no longer fall for that.

Rachel Bilson and Casey Affleck in The Last Kiss. Really? REALLY? Why? Not that I think Rachel Bilson is astoundingly talented, but she's all kinds of adorable and that was just about the worst written role ever.

takenotice: Paul Bettany in just about everything he's been in.

Word, so hardcore. He's so pretty and charming and talented and I've seen Wimbledon at least four times and it makes me sad that that's the best he has to offer. I weep for the waste of talent.

Also, I have a reverse one. Will Farrell in Stranger Than Fiction. Haven't liked anything else of his but LOVED Stranger Than Fiction. WOW, with the good.

"Also, I have a reverse one. Will Farrell in Stranger Than Fiction. Haven't liked anything else of his but LOVED Stranger Than Fiction. WOW, with the good.
Posted by: mandasarah at June 4, 2008 8:44 PM"

Absolutely agree with you! He was awesome, as was it.
It's Ferrell, though. :) Bygones.

HB, Christopher Eccleston can do no wrong. Being the Ninth Doctor grants him automatic ten-year immunity, both retroactively and moving forward. (So it's really 20.)

I'm sorry, but the Christmas Eve scene in LA where Keira's character answers the door ("It's carol singers!") and the whole Bob Dylan posterboard presentation by the best friend - love, love, love. I wish a man would do that for me. Preferably when I am not already married to his best friend.

okay everyone must have collectively blocked this movie from their mind because THE HULK people! Whyyy Eric Bana, why? You're so godamn good!

Also Jack Nicholson in The Gag List and that bloody awful one with Diane Keaton, probably a couple of others as well but he gets a few passes with me for being freakin Jack Nicholson.

Robert Carlyle, Jeremy Irons and John Malkovich in Eragon.

You made the Baby Jesus cry.

Sean Connery, Gena Rowlands, Jon Stewart, Gillian Anderson, Dennis Quaid, Patricia Clarkson, Madeline Stowe, Anthony Edwards, Ellen Burstyn, Jay Mohr, Angelina Jolie and Ryan fucking Phillipe in Playing by Heart. I know a bunch of them weren't all that famous and a couple do kind of suck, but christ on a fuckstick, what a terrible waste of talent.

Plus I know at least three of those are Pajiba sweethearts, but it sure isn't due to that movie.

Oh, and Lauren Graham in Because I Said So. Terrible movie - why can't Graham get cast in something great?

1) Anthony Hopkins and Brad Pitt in "Legends of the Fall" AND "Meet Joe Black."

2) I miss the downplayed version of John C. Reilly.

3) Jake Gyllenhaal in "Bubble Boy"

4) I really miss downplayed John C. Reilly. "Stepbrothers", really?

1) Christian Bale, why did you ever do Harsh Times? It was awful, and you were way too good for that piece of poo poo. (At least he'll be making up for it as the bat man this summer...but really. What a god damn terrible movie that was.)

2) Everything Dominique Swain did after Lolita.

And YeahButNoBut, you'll have to allow Irons his dalliances with really shitty fantasy movies. Consider Dungeons and Dragons. It must be some masochistic fetish of his. Leave him to it and just pretend these things never happened.

Count me in for Smoochy love. That little weirdo was a hell of a funny movie, even if I can barely remember it.

If you guys need a Norton example, I'd go with Keeping the faith, that useless time-waster.

I was reading the comments thinking "Bill Nighy, Bill Nighy, where's Bill Nighy??", and someone came up with him in Love Actually. Considering the spirit of really good actors in really stupid movies, let's just mention any Pirates of the Caribbean instead, no?

Ryan Reynolds in Smokin' Aces. I LOVE him, and HATE that movie. So confusing...

llp - Laren Graham was in Bad Santa which was all kinds of fun.

Digging the smoochy love. Best bit is Robin Williams' melt down after Smoochy saves the whole "dirty cookie" plant: "It's a COCK!!! IT'S A COCK AND BALLS!"

Great actor/crap film... Ed Norton in the Italian Job... or Johnny Depp in Once upon a time in Mexico...

I'm sorry, but I know this is going to break some hearts, and make others want to break my bones. I just want you all to know you're my friends, even after the threats of bodily harm via footwear...

but it's a tie between the cast of Juno and Chris Noth in Sex and the City.

Juno has what would otherwise be an AMAZING cast, but Diablo Cody's dialogue just didn't snare me, and I felt sorry for all involved.

And Chris Noth...you were on Law and Order for God sake. Does that name mean anything to you? (Though kudos for coming back, even if it's on one of the numerous spinoffs.)

Just my personal opinion. If you'll all excuse me, I'll be clutching my Pajiban "Bad Movie Solace Bear" behind a lead shield.

Oh, and I humbly request amnesty for Kevin Spacey with Superman Returns. I found him to be hammy in a funny sort of way, and he deserves it damnit, he was Lester Burnham.

Anthony Hopkins and Brad Pitt in "Legends of the Fall"

I love this movie. It makes me sad every time I watch it. Such a good movie.

Whoever mentioned Gone in Sixty Seconds, WORD. The only highlight of that movie is the cars. Elanor. So pretty and shiny.

TK, Twister, while indisputably bad, is so bad it is awesome. They survive the big scary tornado by using a belt to tie to a water pipe? Really? The horses are still living? The flying cows? If you keep the volume down, I think that it makes a great hangover theater candidate.

The horses are still living?

You can't kill pretty animals, or dogs, in action movies. Doing so is a Dick Thing To Do.

Doing so deliberately, because you know you can't (like in Jurassic Park 2) is not only a Dick Thing To Do, but insures everyone will forget your movie ever happened (like in Jurassic Park 2).

I second Philip Seymour Hoffman in Along Came Polly. He's playing the Jack Black role in a romantic comedy starring Ben Stiller and Jennifer Aniston. You see one of the best actors of his generation talking about "sharting."

Along Came Polly was the movie that broke me of watching deleted scenes. The stuff that made it into the movie was bad enough.

Actually, Dustin, I was forced to watch The Shaggy Dog and RDJ was the only thing that made me want to keep my eyeballs and eardrums in tact. Slumming, yes, but thank goodness he was there to save my horrible, horrible day.

My vote goes to Eric Bana in anything after Munich . He was so great, but then...

Jason Statham in Crank. Worst movie I have ever seen.

Every fucking person in "In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale" (AKA: LoTR without the good plot or Hobbit sex).

Seriously, the cast was all people who should know better.
Jason Statham: I love you. My husband and I have our "Statham collection" where we collect any movie you've been in, crappy or no. It's your fault I own this movie.

Leelee Sobieski: what the hell happened lady?

John Rhys-Davies: Dude, you DID LoTR! Did you not make enough money? Gambling problems??

Ron Perlman: You, gah, I ... minus 50 awesome points babe.

Claire Forlani: seriously? new agent, stat.

Matthew Lillard: well, I don't REALLY expect better from YOU Wing Commander

Ray Liotta: was Goodfella's THAT long ago.

Burt Reynolds: I have no words for you. Well, maybe a few- are you still alive? Is your estate rolling out a mummified corpse ala Weekend at Bernies? That would explain so much...

Sorry, I meant First Knight. I'm still so heartbroken from seeing him in this movie that I see everything pitch black!

Olivia, don't you worry, dear. I'll defend our right to dislike Crank and protect you with my metaphors. I'll be like the condom Juliette Lewis' father should have used instead of trusting that constant belts of Wild Turkey would sauce that baby right on out. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is real, peoples. It's real.

Harvey Keitel in Monkey Trouble

Ben Kingsley in "Sound of Thunder". I spent the entire fifteen hours that piece of crap lasted aghast that OSCAR WINNER BEN FREAKIN KINGSLEY was in that.

WHY? WHY?!

Anyone in "Love Actually" - actually let's just make that any British actor in any rom-com who hams it up Brit-style for American audiences.

Other evidence points to all of you actually being able to act - Colin Firth in "And When Did You Last See Your Father", Kiera Knightley in "Atonement" and "Pride and Prejudice", Hugh Grant in "About a Boy", Emma Thompson in everything else in her entire career, etc. Nothing gets my goat going more than a perfectly talented British actor lowering themselves to this kind of drivel. You can't tell me that they're not geared toward American audiences - I know, I'm one of them and found Bridget Jones' Diary hilarious when I was 22 and before I knew better. I remember being a teenager and thinking that Hugh Grant saying "bugger" over and over again was H-I-LARIOUS.

"Olivia, don't you worry, dear. I'll defend our right to dislike Crank and protect you with my metaphors. I'll be like the condom Juliette Lewis' father should have used instead of trusting that constant belts of Wild Turkey would sauce that baby right on out. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is real, peoples. It's real."

Thanks for the back up. I thought the diversion was to list actors we generally like (as I do Statham) in crap movies we didn't like. Hence my mention of Crank and my eternal saddness that Statham will be in Crank 2.

Bette Davis in Wicked Stepmother. And it was her last film too. Oh, the humanity!

James Coburn and Maggie Smith in Sister Act 2.