Pajiba

I like Channing Tatum. I like his rough-around-the-edges-yet-still-oh-so-pretty prettiness, his voice, even his wooden acting. I find it all endearing because it's obvious that he's really trying no matter how ridiculous he looks or how stupid the movie is. And I will freely admit that I watched "Dear John" because of him. Twice.

Jennifer Lopez. Maybe it's because I'm half-Texican, maybe it's because she is a FIERCE dancer...but it doesn't hurt that the Fug girls do brilliant Jennifer Lopez satires.

You shut up.

Julia Roberts.

Hi. My name is Uncle JR and I like Snookie.

What can I say?

Now, if somebody would kindly point me to where I go for my lobotomy...

Thomas Jane. I don't know if I'm supposed to be ashamed or not but I don't hear much about him anymore. If you've ever watched Thursday I don't see how you CAN'T be a fan of his though.

It used to be Adam Sandler, but his last 4 or 5 movies have been so unbelievably stupid that I've turned on him. His early comedy albums and first few movies hooked me. Then the last decade happened.

I'll have to think about it . . .

Keanu. Seriously.

I loved Bill & Ted and I loved My Own Private Idaho. I don't fault him for the way he played Johnny Mnemonic because I believe that character was pretty emotionless.

I haven't seen many of his recent movies, though.

As far as tv goes, I'd have to say Adrian Paul. The first few episodes of Highlander were really awful (most of the series was, really) but it was so obvious how much fun he was having, it was infectious. He was a joy to watch.

I guess Highlander the TV series would be my not-so-secret tv show shame. :)

When it comes to reality TV, the only reality show I ever really got into was Rock Star: INXS. Dunno why, but I couldn't turn that shit off.

I have to call foul on Thomas Jane as a secret shame. He's been in some dreck--The Punisher, oy--but he's actually a pretty good actor.

That said, Deep Blue Sea may qualify as a secret shame movie. And a glorious one at that...

Cameron Diaz, Gwyneth Paltrow !!!AND!!! Jennifer Aniston. Fuck you all. Anally.

I don't think Ashton Kutcher deserves the level of hate he gets.

And Highlander the tv show is awesome! Own that JGirl!

And and !!!AND!!! Jeremy Piven

Drew Barrymore. I don't know if this is a secret shame, because, honestly, I like her acting. She is just so cute, and bubbly, and seems so fun and I think she picks roles in her range. She not trying to do Shakespeare. On a Sunday afternoon with nothing much to do she's my pick for who to watch.

Oh, and Keanu. "Vaya con dios."

Eliza Dushku. She's a very limited if not outright bad actor but I like her and can't help but wish her well. It's not cause she's hot. She is, but she's not one of my girl crushes. She just seems like a nice person.

Using the term "actor" loosely, it'd be...

Jack Black.

Yes, yes. He's not much of an actor, and he does variations on the same thing everytime. But he always seems to at least be having fun with his role, unlike those acting folks who suffer from the "Twilight-syndrome" (shit-talking a role; acting bored throughout, as if the film was a waste of time and they could be doing something SO much better.)Not that I'm going to jump in line to see Gulliver's Travels, but I think he just gets a worse rap thamn he needs.

And I do appreciate Megan Fox for her ability to realize what she is (eye-candy, male fantasy) and not attempting to stray from that niche. I mean she's not ever going to try and tackle any serious roles. Right?

Right?

Oh and I love Kevin Costner too. Yeah we all love Robin Hood: Prince of Theives but let's face it, the man couldn't act his way out of a paper bag. Listening to him speak is like watching a vanilla ice cream cone make love to a saltine cracker in the backseat of a beige Ford Taurus (1990). But The Postman? Waterworld? I'll watch every last minute. Suck it.

Channing Tatum. He's such a charmer. And there's always a glimmer of potential peeking out. Come on, Channing. GET BETTER!

And please, marm, can I have another?

Keanu Reeves, is frozen face and monontonic, but sometimes it works.

God my palms are sweating:

George Michael.

Aw, crap. He's not an actor.

This is a post-mortem one, but: Ever since I was a little girl, I have had a crush on Oliver Reed. ATHOS! And sexy, sexy Bill Sykes. And later, awful Gerald Crich, famous for his naked wrestling/spirit crushing in "Women in Love." Don't even get me started on "The Devils." That is some messed up shit.

Yes, he was a violent drunk with a penchant for playing violent drunks. Yes, he had those crazy/scary Letterman appeareances in the '80s. Yes, his appearance became increasingly trolldollish over the years. Yes, he had a penis tattoo.

Shadows and dust, baby.

I have no secret shame, because I'm proud of everything I like.

...but I think I know what you mean.

delurking to throw my Twilight love into the mix.

not obsessive psycho "Twi-hard" love or anything.... but i own the books.... and the DVDs.... and have read/watched them more than once.

aaaaannnd.... going back into hiding now...

With you on McConaughey, Dustin. I have to see Sahara every time TNT shows it. And I love his character in Tropic Thunder....but then again, I love Tropic Thunder.

ZombieNurse, Cuddle Party Massacre? Cuddle Party Massacre?!?! Just to know that this movie exists...Godtopus is in His heaven and all's right with the world. If it's on instant play then today I will lay down my life. It is complete.

Vin Diesel. Yeah, I said it. And not just for the bondage poses in Riddick (27, not including when he's actually handcuffed), but because I liked him in Boiler Room and Knock Around Guys (best bar beat down ever) and because he seems to recognize his extremely limited range. Also, the sandblasted bass of his voice does lovely things to my skin.

Reba, he was the voice of the Iron Giant and actually formed the video game companies that created the Riddick video games -- which got very good reviews.

Russell Brand.

Yes, he does play the obnoxious, coked-out, self-obsessed rocker bit pretty much all the time. But he plays it so well.

i'm not sure if i have a secret shame. i tend to get belligerent when the cognoscenti tell me i ought be ashamed of something i like.

i like keannu. don't see what's so shameful. the guy has navigated a lengthy career between comedies, action, sci-fi, horror, indie drama.

i suppose, supernatural and smallville are secret shames, except i am never secretive about them.

my real secret shame is long in the past. When I was 19, and a grungey punk, and also a high literature snob, I watched the original 90210 obsessively. it was the only tv i watched.

jM: Re, Val Kilmer...I think the Kilmerian Facination (I, too, am a victim) stems from the vivid memory of how unearthy good-looking he used to be, and how actually very solid an actor he is. So you look at the bee-stung-swollen-sat-on-an-air-hose-donut-eating current incarnation and you marry that with the memory (dear god the memory) of his past deliciousness and , well... I feel guilty.

But I shouldn't. Because the fact that I carry the torch is evidence that I am not judging superficially. Right? Which is odd because I am one of the most shallow (shallowest?) people I know.

And then I watch my videocassette of The Saint and I feel dirty and sad. Yet again.

Curse you, Pajiba. You and your comment threads torment me still!

I see a few in here that I agree with. Luke and Owen Wilson, love them. Jimmy Fallon, super love him. He's a big ball of cute, awesome, nerdy, talent all in one and I will never be convinced otherwise.

But my true secret shame? The one that makes me hang my head down just by thinking of him, even if I'm by myself? Joaquin Phoenix. I loved him in Signs and that other bad Shyamamamalana whos-it movie, which is shameful enough in itself. And his recent crazy/dirty/arrogant/hairy antics only made it better. I really am a normal and well-adjusted person, so I don't know where this comes from. My only request would be that he shower first, but the hair and beard can stay.

Joaquin Phoenix is absolutely not a secret shame!! Despite his antics of the past year, that man is still one of the greatest actors of his generation, and I know TONS of women that find him extremely hot.

But while we're on the subject of dirty men who need to shower and shave... I lust after Vincent Gallo SO HARD. I don't know what it is, but I just think he would be absolutely mind blowing in bed. I know a lot of people find his personality repulsive, but I dunno... I think he's kidding most of the time. Even if he isn't, I don't care. No need for talking when he's doing very bad things to me. Also, he is truly magnetic as an actor. So talented.

Chris Evans. I'm weak.

And I enjoyed Gwyneth Paltrow the most out of that entire episode of "Glee".

Neil Diamond. I've seen him a few times in concert, and if I'm flipping through the channels and he's doing another christmas special or concert I watch until the next commercial. And sometimes I even go back after the commercial.

He's a genius. Check out Hot August Night, it doesn't get better than that.

Oh, and Vin Diesel. I had a XXX poster on my bedroom wall far longer than was seemly.

Russell Brand, YES. The man is wicked clever even though he looks like he has ALL the diseases.

And, also, Highlander is an amazing show. It taught me everything I know about history. . .wait, what, you mean Roger Daltry from the Who is NOT an immortal and a general roustabout? Damnit, I feel so misled.

penelope, pass me some ferret please. I like mine bbq-ed.

Honk if you love procrastination!

I second (third) the Oliver Reed thing. Tommy...O yes, please. Growl your way through any song you like, darlin.

How horrible am I if I love Van Dam? And I feel that the movie JCVD is my vindication for YEARS of taunting from The Smart Half of my brain. (half. that's funny).

Also: Chris Sarandon. And I get bonus points for the origin of my facination, which is not the predictable and justifiable Fright Night, but Dog Day Afternoon. I know. So ashamed.

And I admit to having a copy of Dot the i that I pull out when my hsuband leaves and watch only certain random Gael Garcia Bernal scenes. But I never feel ashamed of that, because why would I?

Mrs. Julien the actor who played Keamy was nine kinds of asshole in 3:10 to Yuma and fifty kinds of adorable in Mystery, Alaska (which is probably a secret shame movie love of mine. . .I own it. . .on VHS)

Kevin Costner because of Bull Durham. He earned an endless amount of good will from me for that. Lots of questionable choices since then, but I will speak no evil of him.

Bruce Willis for playing David Addison in Moonlighting. He can do wrong in my eyes.

Sandra Bullock cause she seems cool, the one actress type I would want to have a beer with.

Bama- totally with you on Bruce Willis. I think it's because of my ridiculous love for "Fifth Element" (plus his random cameo in the "Stylo" video for the Gorillaz).

Yep. Bruce fuckin Willis.

Man makes me happy.

And, not that he's a guilty pleasure or anything, but I've been rewatching "Deadwood" lately. How did I never truly appreciate Brad Dourif and his mad eyes before?

Ah, God. Amanda Bynes. Heaven help me, I think I've seen almost everything she's ever been in. Including She's the Man and Sydney White.

mrs julien, you must feel such vicarious sweet shame for your friend

You Oliver Reed-lovin' Pajibans are all hearted.

Siege, I have never seen The Great Scout and Cathouse Thursday, but I will now. 1976. Oliver seems to plays a scoundrel. There is Lee Marvin. There is Robert Culp, Elisabeth Ashley, and Strother Martin. IMDB plot keywords are Half Breed, Revenge, Train, Nudity, and Female Nudity. This is all win. Mwah!

The penis tattoo was, I believe, an eagle.

I loved teenage jailbait Drew Barrymore; mature Drew Barrymore not so much. Actually I love most teenage jailbait actresses - Dominique Swain, Toby Wing, Marian Marsh, early Elizabeth Taylor; and I damn sure keep that a secret from the parents I know.

But I'm harmless, really.

Keyword: Half Breed!

That's just deliciously low.
Posted by: klingonfree at December 3, 2010 3:34 PM

I KNOW! It's so deliciously low. So horribly dirty! I thought it would make everyone feel better about themselves because, despite all of the sharing, unburdening and sometimes unpleasant revelations, one can still feel a little ashamed, BUT they can still say, "well at least I'm not a Britney Spears fan". My friend, and that is not a euphemism, this is not a call in radio show, also thinks the Con Air, Coyote Ugly and Dragonfly are great works of art.

Kettle Your mention of "half breed" creates a lovely tangent in what passes for my brain that brings me to Cher. I love Cher. I think she is nine kinds of awesome. There is no shame in my love for Cher, secret or otherwise.

Cher.

Pauly Shore. Hate all you want, but I won't apologize for loving Son-in-Law, Biodome, Encino Man, and yes, even Jury Duty.

I love Steven Seagal. And, I love his movies, especially the one with Levon Helm in it.
I used to watch SS' s movies with the man I love the most, now dead.

Celebrity Babies. Erik Von Detten.* Queen Latifa. Brendan Frasier. Bai Ling. Kirk Cameron.** Anna Paquin.*** Antonio Banderas. Lindsay Lohan. Raonbow Killer.**** Frankie Muniz. Fran Drescer. John Stamos. Jessica Alba. Horatio Sanz.

also, Why would anyone be ashamed of Keanu? I own Bogus Journey and the Replacements on VHS.

*especially in Brink. I will stop and watch any movie that I suspect will end in a dramatic Roller-blading Race. Like Airborne.

**Even though I'll certainly be Left Behind on 5-21-11.

***I like her Sookie, accent and all. She's crazy.

****I have liked Rainbow Killer since Roswell, My Father the Hero, and that live action Disney movie Wish Upon a Star. She may be horrible in real life but I find her completely watchable. Except for Grey's Anatomy.

Hanson.

MmmmBob, bitches.

People are ashamed for liking Bruce Willis? I've been owning the shit out of liking him since I was 11.

I want in on the Brian Austin Green shame, though.

I also have a newly developed appreciation for Ben Affleck thanks to his grey hair.

Ooh, some good ones I also share here... RPattz, Costner, VGallo (whom I also find completely smokin' hot, elizabeth, and we're not the only two... I know of AT LEAST one other. And I believe you are correct: he would be a wildcat in the sack).

But my true secret shame: Jennifer Love Hewitt. She is a bland and terrible actress, the excerpts I've read out of her book were HILARIOUSLY god-awful, and she's even branched out into music and graphic novels which, while I have no experience of them, I'm CERTAIN are also flagrant wastes of time.

AND YET. I watch Ghost Whisperer with a somewhat alarming regularity. I cannot turn off Heartbreakers when I come across it on cable (the same goes for I Know What You Did Last Summer, though to be fair, that is as much for SMG, FPjr. (there's 2 more secret shames right there), Phillipe, and Galecki as it is for JLoHew). I own Can't Hardly Wait on DVD. I find her desperately endearing, despite (because of?) the fact that she vajazzles.

I mean, how do you NOT secretly love someone whose second album, released when she was 16 years old, is titled, "Let's Go Bang"? COME ON.

I'll start off nice and easy and agree with those who've named Drew Barrymore (I have always and will always love her and I don't know why) and Amanda Bynes (she is funny guys, and hey, sometimes when I can't sleep and What I Like About You reruns are on tv, I can't help it; I laugh).

Now, the hard part. Here goes. Channing Tatum (I make myself feel better by making fun of Kellen Lutz fans).

Zac Efron, Taylor Kitsch, Matt Lanter (Liam on 90210) and Steven R. McQueen (Jeremy on The Vampire Diaries). If I was still covering my walls in posters, these would be the faces up there instead of the New Kids shrine I had in junior high school.

Okay, I saw Tom Selleck on TV last night and I take it back. Not the shame part, the liking part.

big league entry you keep

Greg. How? turn thy back and run?

Nothing to do make me feel bored everyday. Do you want to help me ?