December 6, 2007 | Comments ()

By Dustin Rowles | Comment Diversions | December 6, 2007 |


We’ve done a diversions devoted to our secret shames (for both movies and music), and we’ve done diversions devoted to our five freebies and our same-sex top five, but there remains one final permutation, as suggested by a reader, Jessica: Celebrities.

You know what I’m talking about, right? For instance, I’m always weirdly surprised at how many women around my age find Steve Buscemi attractive. I’m a Kinsey 2, and still there is absolutely nothing about Buscemi I find sexually alluring. But it doesn’t have to be someone you’re ashamed of finding attractive — it could also be someone you should be ashamed of wanting to bang; for instance, some find Giovanni Ribisi attractive but find no shame in it despite the fact that the dude looks like a feral rat.

But, don’t limit yourself to just people you want to schtup; you’re also welcome to include among your picks no-talent actors or actresses whom you like, inexplicably, despite the fact that he or she has given you no real reason, recently or ever. Here, I’ll give you my examples, and you all can take over from there.

1) Alicia Silverstone (sexually) - Acceptable ten years ago, but apparently frowned upon now.

2) Kelly Clarkson (sexually) - Whatever. She’s hot. (And I’m not alone in this thinking.)

3) Amanda Foreman (sexually and professionally) — No explanation, really. I just dig the hell out of her. Wherever she is, I hope she’s hanging out with A.J. Langer.

4) Jim Carrey (professionally) — I’m sorry. I like him. I like him in comedies. I like him in dramas. I just don’t like him in family movies.

5) Thomas Cavanagh (professionally) — I will watch anything he’s in; I have no idea why (same with Ginnifer Goodwin).

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Secret Shames -- Celebrity Edition

An Afternoon Comment Diversion / Dustin Rowles

Comment Diversions | December 6, 2007 | Comments ()




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