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I WIsh I May, I Wish I Might: An Afternoon Comment Diversion

By Cindy Davis | Posted Under Comment Diversions | Comments (46)

tardis1.jpg

The other night I was catching up on HBO’s “Mildred Pierce” miniseries and I was utterly taken in by the time period. The cars, the way women dressed, their hair, their shoes…the simplicity of a slower pace. Daydreamer that I am, I found myself imagining myself in that world, though to be sure, I don’t think I’d actually want to be Mildred Pierce. She had quite a time of it, losing a husband and a child and spending her days trying to make enough money to support an ungrateful and bitter daughter. But, I can’t be the only one who, from time to time imagines herself as a movie or television character. I’d be willing to bet a Pajiban or two fancies him/herself as a time traveling Doctor now and again. Heck, I wouldn’t mind flying around in today’s exceptionally roomy TARDIS, myself. Maybe you’d rather trip the years fantastic in a DeLorean DMC-12 or spend the day trying to hide ET from your mother…perhaps you always wanted to wield a lightsaber or let out your inner John Cleese? Hermione or Harry Potter, Mary Poppins or Anna Leonowens—Catwoman or Batman? Atticus Finch or Verbal Kint, Sandy Olsson or Andie Walsh? For today’s diversion, which movie or television character do you see yourself as or wish you could be (if only for a day)?









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Comments

Seth Bullock...Deadwood.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at April 12, 2011 5:19 PM

Martian Manhunter.

Flight. Super-speed. Super-strength. Invulnerability. Invisibility. Intangibility. Shape-changing. Mind-reading. Martian Vision. The only bad part would be the crushing lonliness and haunting memory of a dead and forgotten race.

Nah, I'm just kidding. You people know me well enough by now to know that I don't possess empathy or regret.

Posted by: superasente at April 12, 2011 5:22 PM

Christina Hendricks's wardrobe.

Posted by: Paultera at April 12, 2011 5:27 PM

When I was growing up, I wanted to be the Yellow Power Ranger.

Most days, I wish I were Romana-II.

Posted by: Aislinn at April 12, 2011 5:30 PM

As far as reality goes, I am an uncomfortable adult mix of Daria and Rachel Berry.

But I want to be Temperence Brennan or Ziva David.

Posted by: Siege at April 12, 2011 5:33 PM

Yeah, I would love to take the TARDIS for a spin too.

My answer, though: Han Solo. Post-Return of the Jedi. My motivation is as salacious as Salacious Crumb.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at April 12, 2011 5:36 PM

Richard Harland in Leave Her To Heaven, because then I'd be married to Gene Tierney, and she wouldn't even need to become homicidally jealous, because I would TOTALLY neglect my friends and family, ALL of them, just to be with her. And she hates kids, just like I do! Man, that would be the woman for me.

Posted by: Todd at April 12, 2011 5:43 PM

I'm going to have to old school with this one - given the chance, I'd like The Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court's job.

If I can't get that job, then for the sheer honour for being in Her Majesty's presence, I'll take Geoffrey Rush's job in Elizabeth (Sir Francis Walsingham).

Posted by: Wintermute at April 12, 2011 5:47 PM

Zoe from Firefly.

Posted by: Stella at April 12, 2011 5:48 PM

Tough choice.
Nick Charles in The Thin Man or Philip Marlowe in The Big Sleep.
A win either way.

Posted by: Spender at April 12, 2011 5:53 PM

I'd also like to be, for a couple days:

Raylan Givens (Justified)- He's a badass. I'd kick my ex-wife to the curb. After one last romp, of course.

Nancy Botwin (Weeds)- I'd hand my kids over to social services and then throw myself off a cliff.

Special Agent Dale Cooper (Twin Peaks)- He's cool, I'd really like to try some of that Damn Good Pie and I'd have sex Lara Flynn Boyle before she started to look like a baboon's ass.

Posted by: Paultera at April 12, 2011 5:56 PM

Another role I think I could crush out of the park:

Any James Bond villain ever. M and Q would go through Bonds so fast that Moneypenny would never wear anything but black ever again.

Posted by: Wintermute at April 12, 2011 6:01 PM

Tony Leung in almost every movie but specifically In The Mood For Love. Guy is the definition of Steez McKnees in that shit.

Posted by: Sad Rockstar at April 12, 2011 6:38 PM

Roger the Shrubber. A skilled tradesman who provides a unique service in plague ridden Medieval England, who also gets to talk smack to a King and a knight? I think it would be a pretty sweet gig.

Posted by: Groundloop at April 12, 2011 6:40 PM

Movies - Bruce Lee. A walking talking ass kicking machine. Wax on Wax off.

TV - Fox Mulder, only I would spend as much time trying to get into Scully's pants as searching for the truth.

Comic Book - The Hulk so I could just smash. Whatever.

Music - Dr Funkenstein. The bigger the headache the bigger the pill. Swift lipping, ego tripping and body snatching.

Posted by: John W at April 12, 2011 7:02 PM

Lydia Deetz. I want to play with ghosts.

Posted by: Julie at April 12, 2011 7:03 PM

Lily Tomlin's character Violet Newstead in Nine to Five. She gets to poison and kidnap her boss, take over the company and run it her way and everyone loves her at the end. Also, she smokes pot with her girlfriends, likes her kids and can fix a garage door.

Baby steps for me my friends.

Posted by: Mrs Smith at April 12, 2011 7:11 PM

The Doctor (13th, with the limit)

Travis McGee.

A competent incarnation of Harry Potter.

Spiderman.

Posted by: Ryan at April 12, 2011 7:21 PM

Cliche around these parts, I know, but I'd want to be Joan Holloway for a day. I've long wondered what it would be like to be that ballsy....and, for that matter, boobsy....

Posted by: meaux at April 12, 2011 7:25 PM

Christina Hendricks's bicycle seat.

Posted by: bleujayone at April 12, 2011 8:06 PM

Jackie Burkhart, so I could french Hyde,(sans beard) the coolest guy on the planet, and also be adorable and rich at the same time.

Posted by: kirbyjay at April 12, 2011 8:16 PM

I never wanted to be James T. Kirk, but gods did I want his ship. Just for one day to warp around in the Enterprise...

Posted by: funtime42 at April 12, 2011 8:19 PM

I'd want to be in a study group at Greendale Community College.

Posted by: The Mutt at April 12, 2011 8:25 PM

Lauren Bacall in How to Marry a Millionaire. LeelooMinaLeckataribaLaminatchaEckbatDeSabat.
Alex Drake (Ashes to Ashes) because I'd have taken me some of that Gene Genie. Oh my yes, yes I would!

Posted by: replica at April 12, 2011 8:52 PM

Han. fucking. Solo.

1. Millennium Falcon
2. his sidekick is a Wookie
3. you know that Leia kept the gold bikini after Jabba's for some kinky fantasy role-play nights...

Posted by: causaubon at April 12, 2011 8:55 PM

I think I'd have to say Charlie Baltimore from The Long Kiss Goodnight. Sure, the whole amnesia, getting beat to shit and tortured thing kinda sucks, but the whole badass assasin with suitcases full of money most assuredly does not suck.

Plus, even the amnesia thing turned out pretty well - she got a very nice family out of the deal. Win. And let's face it, anyone who tells some kid that she'll kill him if he says anything about seeing her is someone that gets my vote.

Posted by: noodlestein at April 12, 2011 9:00 PM

graham (james spader) from sex, lies, and videotape

Posted by: splinter at April 12, 2011 9:08 PM

Whoever is shagging Benedict Cumberbatch at the moment....

Posted by: Jules at April 12, 2011 9:25 PM

@Jules
Yes!!

Either the Doctor's companion (I wanna say Amy Pond because she has a cool name and, eh, the Eleventh Doctor is really hot) or a member of the study group from Community.

Posted by: Ellie at April 12, 2011 10:02 PM

Psmith

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at April 12, 2011 10:07 PM

Lizzy Bennet, non-Keira Knightley version. If I wanted to be flat as a board I'd at least choose Veronica Mars.

Ooh, that's another one. Veronica Mars.

Also, Annie from Community, because she's the hot version of my Tracie Flick/Rachel Berry/Hermione Granger manic overachiever personality type. Albeit with a past pill addiction.

Posted by: Erin S at April 12, 2011 10:14 PM

When I was a kid, I wanted to be Jean Grey aka Phoenix. Only I wouldn't have been dating Cyclops, I would've been all UP in Logan's business.

As a teenager, I would've said Buffy. But Buffy in high school, when she was dating Angel and fighting the Mayor.

Now? Maybe Lt. Uhura from the revamped Star Trek. Sexy, smart, and traveling the galaxy. And I'd totally be a slut for a day and hit up Sulu, Kirk, Spock, etc.

Geez. Most of my fantasies seem to revolve around being a slut. That's not right, is it?

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at April 12, 2011 10:18 PM

Another vote for Zoe from Firefly. Always wanted to be her.

When I'm that old, Maude from Harold and Maude.

Posted by: Chipwitch at April 12, 2011 11:13 PM

Dammit!!! @Stella I made the mistake of reading the comments before deciding FIRMLY who I wanted to be and read yours and realized that you took my first choice! Curses!

Besides that, duh, Buffy. Or rather, Faith. I want to be Faith, pre-incarceration era, when she was still hittin' the mean streets. When she was totes badass and wore a lot of leather. It would be like being Buffy, but without the guilt and superiority/inferiority complexes (complexi?).

Or if that is not an option, I take Galadriel for 1000. Come on, the Lady of Light takes no prisoners. She just gives them like, pieces of her hair and dun-colored cloaks and stuff.

Posted by: LBeees at April 12, 2011 11:25 PM

Ellen Hickle, Adventures of Pete and Pete. A divine blend of nerd and badass. Throughout my teenage years, i harbored fantasies about grand romantic gestures involving marching bands and PA systems. Still do, really. Maybe that's why I'm marrying a band director.

Posted by: StoatCat at April 12, 2011 11:32 PM

John Holmes.

Posted by: , at April 13, 2011 1:40 AM

Buffy

Veronica Mars

Lorelai or Rory Gilmore (seasons 1-3 only)

Chuck from Pushing Daisies - how great would it be to smooch Ned (kind of) and eat pie all day??

Posted by: Even Stevens at April 13, 2011 2:12 AM

I want to make a film just so I can be a character in it. Being other characters is unoriginal.

Posted by: zomgmouse at April 13, 2011 4:22 AM

Does it have to be a fictional character? Because I'd kind of love to be Little Edie Beale. She and I share a similar knack for choosing the best costume for the day, and also we're both staunch women- S-T-A-U-N-C-H.

Posted by: Anna von Beav at April 13, 2011 8:51 AM

I'd love to be Princess Leia except for the making out with your brother thing.

As far as similarities go, I see myself as Liz Lemon sometimes. She dates more men than I do but we have pretty much the same problems and she's 40 and I'm 26. I don't know if that's good or bad.

Posted by: Sofia at April 13, 2011 9:00 AM

Wow...any of the following:

Agent Scully...smart, cute and gets to shag Mulder

Kaywinnet Lee Frye...cute, competent, comfortable in her own skin, gets to travel around with the Firefly crew

The REAL Emma Peel---gorgeous, awesome clothes, awesome cars and ass-kicking

Rose Tyler---#10....enough said

Posted by: dammitjanet at April 13, 2011 9:54 AM

I agree with dammitjanet, I wanted to be Emma Peel. Diana Rigg was so cool.

I would also love to travel through time and space with the Doctor as myself, the 11th for preference, but I would happily settle for either of them. Given the chance, I would also punch Amy Pond in the face for the way she treated Rory in the previous season.

Posted by: Malin at April 13, 2011 10:28 AM

I always wanted to be the first female doctor.

Regeneration fantasy:

POOF!

Companion: DOCTOR! You're . . . You're . . .
Doctor: What? What? (Feeling my face)
Companion: You're missing a finger!
Doctor: What? (Looks at nine fingers)
Doctor: I wonder what else is missing? (Grabs chest)
Doctor: Oh, whew! Two hearts! You had me worried there for a minute.
Companion: But your a woman!
Doctor: Ah, yes. Well, I always was a late bloomer. That was the great thing about Gallifrey. Complete equality of the sexes, because you never knew when you were going to switch sides.

I also wanted to be Elizabeth Bennett (Jennifer Ehle version); and Myrna Loy in the Thin Man, because she was rich and elegant and married to William Powell.

Posted by: BWeaves at April 13, 2011 10:42 AM

Maximus Decimus Meridius.

Posted by: Forward Observer at April 13, 2011 11:13 AM

Harry Dresden.

No, wait. That guy gos through to much shit. I'd rather be Ramirez.

Posted by: FabMax at April 13, 2011 4:29 PM

And, how could I forget....

ALMA GARRETT

Posted by: dammitjanet at April 13, 2011 9:27 PM