Pajiba

Growing up in Stanly County, NC, I always found myself snickering when passing through the neighboring towns of Finger & Big Lick

Please tell me that today is the first of April.

There's a furniture store around here called Badcock. Tack on that there is one in a city called Cumming, GA. In other words Badcock in Cumming.

I HAVE been in a threesome...what does THAT tell you?

Bonnar is a fairly common surname where I live, and it is unfortunately pronounced "Boner." I know of a Dick Bonnar, and a local butcher shop called Bonnar's Meats.

Oh, and my dad worked with a fellow named Cel Dicks. The cafeteria lady thought she was being pranked when someone called her and asked "Cel Dicks in the cafateria?".

There's a very popular fried chicken place not too far from home called the Lick-a-Chick.

I used to work in a phone center, one of our regular callers was Dr. Poon. For clarification it was a pizza place, not a sex line.

I've been to Twatt on Shetland Island and it was a HUGE disapointment.

for some reason, whenever I'm heading west on the I-94 from Ann Arbor to Kalamazoo, just after the exit for Battle Creek, I start breathing heavily around the same time as I see the sign "1/4 mile to Climax"

Went to high school with Mike Hawks-Bigg.

Posted by: ZoBla at June 12, 2010 4:42 PM
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That guy is never going to get a pizza delivered.

PIZZA HUT: OK, that's one large pan with everything. Your total's $19.95. Name?

MHB: Mike Hawks-Bigg.

PIZZA HUT: *click*

PIZZA HUT MANAGER: Who was that?

PIZZA HUT: Same douchebag who calls every Saturday.

In Kentucky, There's Big Bone Lick State park. Makes me giggle every time I see it.

My mom swears that she went to college with a girl named Fonda Peters.

There is a christian bookstore here called CUM Books.

Big Bone Lick State Park's entrance is at the junction of Big Bone and Beaver Roads. No lie.

If, after your visit to the park, you hang a left on Beaver and meander through the country a bit, you'll end up at the other source of unintentional comedy in Northern Kentucky.

No, I'm not referring to Jim Bunning's house, where half the time you'll find him Alzheimerically wandering the neighborhood in his old baseball stirrups and little else, trying to get someone to help him "find the pitcher's mound."

The Creation Museum, where you can see cavemen saddling up dinosaurs and learn how the fossil record is God's Big Lie to test our faith, is just a hop, skip, and a jump from Ol' Big Bone. Yabba Dabba Doo!

We have a neighbor who's name is Gay Dahlke. It's just not an easy name to live with.

I know someone named Dong Sok (pronounced like, you guessed it, "SUCK").

In upper Manhattan, there is an intersection: Seaman and Cumming. And it's very near Dykeman Street.

There was a construction company in Alabama named Rawhide Erection.

My brother attended Morehead State University in Morehead, Ky. Morehead was at one time the Hard Wood Capitol of the U.S.

When I was an ESL teacher, I had a student whose name was either -

English Order - You Seok Seo (you suck so)
Korean Order - Seo, You Seok (so, you suck)

He was an advanced level student and understood that it was funny. There was a female student named Won Seok (one suck) and we had a debate in the teachers' room about whether to find a way to tell her. We decided that since she was staying only a few weeks we wouldn't, but if she had been staying longer someone was going to have to take her aside.

I live near Lancaster, PA, and there are some of the really odd names out here. I even saw a college comedian do a whole insane slideshow about it. Here are a few:

Intercourse, PA (also Paradise and Climax)

Blue Ball, PA

And don't forget that Punxatawny Phil lives at Gobbler's Knob.

The comedian had a big finish with a photo of a community garbage can in the town of Athol. It said "Please keep Athol clean."

Michiganders! Holla atcha boy! And I'm not too far from Big Beaver. I laugh every time.

There's a prominent realtor here in town who's proper name is Richard Mopper. What does he go by? Dick. Dick Mopper.

I almost forgot! One of my closest friends lives on Gobblers Knob Lane!

Chiu Mai Chang

It sadly has been a very long time since I chewed anyone's chang.

Mr. Julien says there was a man named Richard Weed in his home town of Bethel, CT. Every day teenagers would drive by his house yelling, "Hey Dick Weed!"

There's a popular convenience store in Iowa called Kum and Go. I would laugh every time I passed it.

Knew a guy with the last name Rapey. It's pronounced "rapp-ey" but no one actually says it that way.

I live within a 20 mile radius of both Cooter AND Gobler, MO....

There's a butcher shop where I used to live named Hummer's Smoked Meats.

There's a guy at my office whose last name is "Hummer." I can't not think dirty things when I hear it.

There are two streets near my home in southern NH, one called "French Hussey" and the other "Dick Dame Lane"

I grew up in New Hampshire where a our House Rep. was named Dick Swett.

Not a name of anything but Dorothy's post reminded me. A few years ago on vacation we stopped in at a McD's to get the kids some ice cream for being good during the long drive. They were giving away toy cars at the time.

My then five year old son came running out to the picnic area yelling excitedly, "MOM! I got a HUMMER!"

There's a road just outside of town in Richmond called "Licking Hole Rd."

Can't believe there's noone here who has mentioned Tom Raper RVs. Giant RV dealership close to the Indiana/Ohio state line on I-70

I went to high school with a girl named Candy Kain. What was her mother thinking?

The choir director at my high school was named Bernie Butt.

His wife? Rosie Butt.

Also, we're living in England at the moment, right next to the town of "Cockermouth." Never ceases to make me giggle.

There's a large logistics company here in Switzerland called 'Galicker', you see the trucks all the time on the motorway...also a store in Berne called 'Annlicker'. *snort*

Anyone with a naughty mind who's ever driven that butt-ugly highway to Myrtle Beach, SC should remember the 'Park and Blow' restaurant.

But it's been years since I've seen it, don't know if it's still there.

I come from a lovely little beach town called Yorkeys Knob. We are super proud of our Knob and sell t-shirts at the post office and the boat club that say "Yorkeys Knob- bigger than Moby Dick".

There is also an annual Festival of the Knob where you can buy shirts and stubby coolers that say "I had a ball at the Festival of the Knob"

There was an uproar when a huge luxury resort chain wanted to build a resort and advertised it at Yorkeys Beach instead of Knob. (They ended up not building it)

Knob knob knob. It's so much fun to say- and we'd never get in trouble for calling someone a knob in primary school- because our school had knob in it's name!!

I suppose this won't mean anything to US readers if it turns out that is is a regional sort of slang but it certainly gets a laugh out of most Aussies.

soraya,

Rest assured "knob" has the same double meaning over here as it does over there.

Other towns over here that have such a double entendre include, Woods Hole, MA, Humptulips, WA, Conception Harbour, NL, Butzville, PA, Bald Knob, AK, and of course a list couldn't be complete with those two crazy towns in Kentucky; Big Bone and Beaverlick.

All this makes me really wish London had kept some of it's good old street names, long since renamed for propriety's sake.
But sadly, Gropecunt Lane is no more. Though apparently Bollocks Terrace and Honeypot Lane still exist.

Fortuitous timing! I recently spent 3 weeks cleaning out files. These are the five best names I encountered.

5. Innocent Obe
4. Mama Maroney
3. Patience Shittu
2. Willie Quick
1. Rafi Salami.

Rafi Salami, in my humble opinion, could make a fortune in porn.

With all the Catholic church controversy, it's a little amusing and disturbing that there's also a "Pope Lick Road" here in Kentucky.

As far as threesomes go, there's always the person you really want to be with, and the person you tolerate. If you want to be with both of them, then guess what: you're being tolerated.

In Mrs. ,'s little home town there is a Titus Street. For many years, the pole holding up the street sign ran through the U, so it read:

TIT S St.

They "fixed" that, sadly.

Also, my idea for a bar franchise came to me when I was sitting in the mall and looked at the shop across the courtyard, and with a pillar in the perfect position the shop sign read:

MEN S WEARHOUSE

Now I want to start a chain called MEN SWEARHOUSE. We wouldn't let you in the door unless you could recite Carlin's seven words.

Oh, and you'd have to be a man, obviously. (Women would be admitted as guests.)

I have a guy who ran for local office down here named Richard Sweat. But he didn't go by Richard, or even Rich. Dozens of signs about town were emblazoned with "Vote for Dick Sweat".

Lots of fun names when I was in the Navy. There was a Seaman Samples in my boot camp division, and rumors of a girl named Seaman Guzzler. And I definitely saw a Seaman Stain and a Seaman Sweat. I know a guy who was in the Army too- his name at some point was Private Eder.

My high school biology teacher, who was awesome, was named Richard Frick. As in Dick Frick. The last day of class, we had a free-for-all, and we were all hanging out with Dick and joking around. I decided to write on the board Richard (Dick) Les Frick. His middle name wasn't actually wasn't Les, I just desperately wanted it to be.

Thank god our grades were already in.

My choir director at Governor's School was Philip Michael Hunt, who immediately became for the rest of the summer, "Philip Mike Hunt." Fortunately, he thought this was hilarious (or played along really well).
Others have mentioned Climax, NC, which is very near High Point. The signs reading "Climax / High Point" always left me thinking, "Yes, when done right."

Fuck off. Both of my kites are called Woger.

(When you're kiteboarding and something goes wrong and you end up being dragged on pebbles on a beach or similar you have to release the kite to save your skin *literally* ... you get the connection there).

"Fuck you Supra Porn.

I have no idea how she spelled it; it sounds Thai.

Posted by: Brenton"

Nope. She's Laotian.

My mother has a book of names we see like this...anyway Notorious VMG and others, I work in Lancaster PA and when leaving the city towards philly you have the following options:

Go through Intercourse and get to Paradise or bypass Intercourse and you hit Blue Ball....I love the amish

Sitting in a convertible, waving to the crowd at the local Christmas parade, all smiles as only a 8 year old beauty pagent winner can smile:

Little Miss Lacey Cheeks

How could a mother do that to her child?

I think Newfies have this in the bag, but in Nova Scotia one can visit Ecum Secum, Shag Harbour and Meat Cove.

I used to date a girl whose last name was Slocum.
...
MY GIRLFRIEND: (looking over my shoulder as I type this) Was it true?
...
Thank bob she was just distracted by the kitten, so I don't have to answer that question now.

There's a town here in Austria called "Fucking".
There's also a bar/restaurant in Vienna called "The G-Spot". When a former (male) boss asked if I could recommend the lunch menu, I replied that I personally loved the place but unfortunately most men seemed to get lost on their way there. He failed to see the humour. I quit that job shortly thereafter.

A truck just drove past. Proudly emblazoned on the
side:

"Butts Pumps & Motors"

There's a seafood restaurant in Florida called Dirty Dick's. They sell t-shirts that say "I got my crabs from Dirty Dicks!"