Jeff Reed is the placekicker for the Pittsburgh Steelers, and he's a huge douche.
First off, he looks like this:
(And if you're entertained by those, just Google him for more fun.)
Second off, here's part of his Wiki entry:
Reed was cited by police on the night of February 14, 2009, for disorderly conduct and criminal mischief for destroying a paper towel holder in a bathroom at a Sheetz convenience store in New Alexandria, Pennsylvania. Reed was reportedly angry that the men's restroom was out of paper towels. He pleaded guilty to the two summary offenses and was fined $543.50.
Reed was cited again for public intoxication related charges on October 18th, 2009, hours after the team defeated the Cleveland Browns, and later apologized to his team for his conduct.
Depending on who you believe, he may have offered to fight a police officer during the latter dustup.
Third off, here's how he explained his conduct, after it was revealed he was ordered to undergo a mental health evaluation for the October incident (and as you read it, keep in mind that he's been designated the Steelers' franchise player, which guarantees him a salary of at least $2,814,000, and that he's trying to negotiate a new contract before the season starts):
"Everybody in their lives no matter who you are, or what job you have or if you're a professional athlete or a Joe on the street, everybody's had their share of stuff they've got away with. And everybody's had their share of getting in trouble for what may seem not as prominent as people think it is."
There, that should clear thin ... wait, what.the.fuck?
Ummm ... well, the part of that I can make sense out of is, "Everybody's had their share of stuff they've got away with."
Like that time in college when I set fire to my dorm, an incident the details of which I have rehashed here a time or two and feel no need to bore you with again.
Besides, this is not about me.
This is about you.
What have you "got away with?"