January 28, 2009 | Comments ()

By Dustin Rowles | Comment Diversions | January 28, 2009 |


Last week’s diversion was one of the more entertaining ones we’ve had in a while, and if you haven’t gone through the comments, put aside an hour during a snow storm, and wade through them. It’s amazing, really, the guilt that has haunted some of you for years or even decades. And there’s some really funny anecdotes in there, too.

Today’s diversion is in a similar vein: I am soliciting crazy ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend stories, which should make for some entertaining afternoon reading. I’ve collected crazy ex stories over the years, and I’ve got a lot of them (an ex once ran over me with her car, for instance, and here’s some advice, free of charge: Right before the moment of impact, jump. You’ll hit the windshield (and probably crack it), but you’ll roll over the top and land behind the car somewhat unscathed), but this one is my favorite, although I feel almost terrible about sharing it. But, I figure any of you who actually know me personally, already know the story and the ex, and the rest of you have no idea to whom I’m referring, anyway. So here goes:

On the day I graduated law school, I attended the ceremony and dinner afterwards with my then current girlfriend. However, after she dropped me off at my door and went home to pick up something, I walked into my shared house, up to my bedroom, and opened the door. Inside: The entire room had been completely destroyed. Books were strewn all over the place, glasses were broken, a lamp had been smashed, and furniture destroyed. It looked as though an earthquake had mated with a tornado inside. However, in the very center of the room, on my bed, lay my ex-girlfriend, completely naked but for the bottle of vodka she was holding.

Cheers.

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Crazy Exes

An Afternoon Comment Diversion / Dustin Rowles

Comment Diversions | January 28, 2009 | Comments ()




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