Ranking the Assumed Discomfort of These Celebrities Posing Naked With Fish
Sometimes the things an organization does to raise money for a charity don’t always make a whole lot of sense. Like putting on a ridiculously expensive gala instead of just donating those costs directly. Or… ice buckets. (Okay, that one was actually really damn effective.) Or, in this most recent case, getting a bunch of respected British actresses to take off their clothes and pose with dead sea creatures. To, you know, promote awareness. Of stuff. Totally logical, right?
Well, that’s what the charity Fishlove has done. And while I suppose they’ve sort of succeeded in raising awareness in regard to ethically sourcing seafood because, well, here we are talking about it, I’m more concerned with the awkwardness of these photos (all of which are available for purchase through Fishlove, by the way, if you absolutely need Lobster Judi Dench on your bathroom wall).
The Inbetweeners’ Tamla Kari
Discomfort level of fish lips on the temple: 2
Discomfort level: 4. Maybe just a little cold. A bit scaly for the crack area.
Helena Bonham Carter (Part 1)
HBC’s photos are actually from back in February, before everyone jumped on the naked fish cuddle bandwagon. Discomfort level: From her seeming reluctance to want to get too close and what appear to be scaly scratches on her leg, I’m gonna go with a 4.5.
Helena Bonham Carter (Part 2)
Discomfort level: These are tender and loving caresses, but this is still a dead fish. 6.
Julie Christie’s fish & other stuff bath
Discomfort level: 10. Gross. Crustaceans everywhere.
Judi Dench’s Lobster Bra
Actual discomfort: 3
Potential discomfort: 11. A million. Infinity.
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