Nut Shrinkage and Bacne. Oh, Snooki, You Are A DELIGHT
Selections from A Shore Thing:
He had an okay body. Not fat at all. And naturally toned abs. She could pour a shot of tequila down his belly and slurp it out of his navel without getting splashed in the face.
When she slurped the tequila out of that nameless man's navel, I think she was really speaking to the human condition.
Yum. Johnny Hulk tasted like fresh gorilla.
Her word pictures put me right there at her side. I can almost taste the gorilla. Tastes like stale latex, Cool Water for Men, and regret.
Any juicehead will get some nut shrinkage. And bacne. They fly into a 'roid rage, it is a 'road' 'roid rage.
So 'roidy. Like the storm.
Gia danced around a little, shaking her peaches for show. She shook it hard. Too hard. In the middle of a shimmy, her stomach cramped. A fart slipped out. A loud one. And stinky.
Me right now:
I love food. I love drinking, boys, dancing until my feet swell. I love my family, my friends, my job, my boss. And I love my body, especially the badonk.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And we've beheld such beauty. Such elegant, graceful beauty. She's like a swan. Like a pregnant swan.
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