My Internal Struggle With This Jessica Simpson Baby Weight Mess
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My Internal Struggle With This Jessica Simpson Baby Weight Mess

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrities Are Better than You | September 13, 2012 | Comments ()


I am...conflicted. Please, hear me out.

So, as you may have heard, Jessica Simpson got pregnant. Then she got very big. Then she had a baby. Then she got smaller, but not as smaller or as quickly as many other famous females sometimes do. This is a very big deal. She has spent practically the last year as a fat punchline to some, as a symbol of the unfair and often impossible standards of beauty demanded of women to many others.

Here's where I fall on the spectrum: I don't think she's either.

Because, yeah, it's stupid that people are giving her shit for not being thin enough. That sucks.


Jessica Simpson signed the dotted line and made a multi-millon dollar deal with Weight Watchers to lose this baby weight, turning the public focus to her body on purpose.

We can break this down into a few different points:

  • Losing the baby weight is stupid hard, and it can be a real struggle. And, while it's a tad difficult for me to feel okay with the fact that a billionaire whose only actual job is to put her name on shoes is trying to play the "I'm just like you, women with full-time jobs and not-nannies" card, I shan't fault her for that, because at least it truly is more relatable than the celebrities who hand the kid over to anyone who will take it and proceed to work out six hours a day. Plus, the natural chemistry of one's body changes after giving birth, so, for many women, it's not even a matter of working out or dieting--it's a whole hormonal disaster of stupid. So I'll give her that one. Point Simpson.

  • THAT SAID. It's Jessica Simpson. Jessica. Simpson. The girl who, before we named her Holy Saint F-Cup, Patron Saint of People Who Weigh Over 130, we all knew as basically a helium balloon with blonde hair. Was this fair? Hell, who knows. I don't know her personally. But the whole persona she's cultivated over the past 13 years has been one of "I fart and say really stupid things and you need to think I'm adorable." I'm sure she's a very sweet person with a heart made of gummy bears, but the fact that Weight Watchers genuinely thought that this person, who has spent her entire career not really being able to actually do anything, could pull off a Christian Bale-esque transformation in five months without a small army of babysitters and handlers. That's on them. Point Not-Weight Watchers.

  • THAT SAID. I can't even talk about her various flaws and foibles without feeling bad. She really does seem nice. Aw. BUT, she made a career out of being a dumb giggly girl, making a living out of perpetuating the idea that stupid equals cute. That is annoying. BUT, aw. And now I have a headache.

  • THAT SAID. She took the deal. Therefore, she is the one who made it about her body. This is not like those annoying people who say things like "she decided to become famous, so she has to deal with it." That is not the case. My issue is that by making the business decision to make your body the focal point of an entire advertising campaign, expecting high fives and accolades and magazine covers, it is at best naive, at worst delusional, to expect only those things.

Again, this has nothing to do with whether or not she should have lost the weight, be it from a contractual standpoint or a societal standpoint. We should not care that the star of Blonde Ambition isn't as skinny as her peers in the industry, even though I don't know who those peers are anymore, because she doesn't technically have a job other than Name On Shoes. No one should be putting pressure on anyone, famous or otherwise, to lose weight for purely aesthetic purposes, particularly after giving birth. I mean, *solidarity fist* I feel you, my sister. And, for the record, I think she looks good.

BUT. SHE DID IT! She willingly participated in a huge series of negotiations all about her physical appearance for the sole purpose of using said physical appearance to sell a product. She is being celebrated as a "you go girl" icon for fighting the idea that we need to lose weight shortly after having a baby for making the decision to become the national spokesmodel for losing weight shortly after having a baby.

And, now, she's going on a media blitz, talking about how she wouldn't appear in a full body shot in her Weight Watchers ad because she "didn't want it to be about her weight." Because that's not her, that's not what she does. (AHEM.) I call bullshit. If she'd gotten down to the right number, she'd be in those Daisy Dukes again on the cover of People. It's only not about the numbers right now because it's not the right number. And, while I respect the things she is saying about her struggle and just wanting to be happy with herself, it rings hollow when you remember that her whole plan was to flaunt a hot bod in our faces as though it were something we could all accomplish.

Because she didn't take four million dollars to be your martyr. She took four million dollars to be hotter than you. And now she's being turned into some kind of hero for womankind, fighting the good fight for all of us, when it all started by signing herself to participate in the very societal pressure she is supposedly rallying us against.

So, I am...conflicted. On one hand, I am an admirer of famous women with atypical bodies for their industry. On the other hand, I am loath to celebrate someone purporting to be "just like me!" as a backup plan when the initial goal of whittling herself down to 2005 didn't work out. On the other hand, wouldn't it be a fantastic world if we suddenly didn't give a fried Twinkie about a famous person's weight? On the other hand (for the purposes of this confused rant, I am an octopus. With hands.), wouldn't it be great if those famous people didn't try so hard to make us care about their weight (but only if it's enviable)? On the other hand, some celebrities that do these campaigns really are trying to help people. On the other hand, having a formerly plump celebrity shill weight loss plans is totally different from someone who just had a goddamn baby being expected to not only lose all that weight on a deadline, but to credit the weight loss plan with the entire weight loss, even though at least 20 pounds--minimum--of it is pure nature. On the other hand, maybe I'm cynical and she's coming from a place only of goodness and light. On the other hand, chicken. By the sea.

I'm at a loss.

5 Shows After Dark 9/13/12 | Redheads Are Becoming Extinct? Not While They Look Like This They Aren't.

Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Ariel

    This English teacher is just super-excited you wrote "That said" instead of "That being said", which is THE. WORST. PHRASE. EVER. Point Courtney Enlow!

  • Nadine

    I totally, totally agree with this, that there are two sides to it and both are valid.

    But personally, just me, I think I ultimately fall on the side of sympathy. I'm a soft touch, but I can't help but think that I literally don't give a fuck, a flying one, a cartwheeling one, a single itty bitty one, I am entirely lacking in fucks to give about the fact she signed a contract and was paid money. It's her human body and if she found working out a slower pace was more comfortable for her, or that the weight didn't come off as quickly, then Weight Watchers should stop bitching and do some basic PR. 40llbs is a fucking impressive amount of weight.

  • MissE

    This is near a dear to me. My babies are 21 and 4 months old. I gained a total of 60 "me" pounds with the 2 pregnancies being so close and it is fricking hard as hell to lose the weight. There isn't a woman alive who doesn't want to lose it quickly. My motivation is in the two tubs of pre-pregnancy clothes I can't fit into- who wants to buy 3-4 additional WARDROBES (cause it's not just a few outfits, it's bras, sleep clothes, work clothes... 60 pounds isn't just about squeezing into old stuff) just to have a kid?

    Also, I have a nanny so I'm feeling a teeny bit of the shaming here. Nanny is actually cheaper than daycare, and my job isn't "be a celebrity" so I guess I can look past the comparisons.

    My guess is that she thought it'd be easy on WW and it wasn't. I kind of wish she'd come out and say "you know, I like spending time with my kid, I've got the cash to buy myself some new clothes and if being heavier than I was is the price for not torturing myself, I'm game!" I wish I'd say that to myself instead of feeling so damn bad about sitting around with my kids instead of going to the gym. I think what's missing is the bigger conversation, that it's ok if it takes a year or so.

  • bleujayone

    Where's the conflict? No really, where is it? We don't even get the pleasure of schadenfreude here? This isn't even getting to watch someone knocked off their perch with a healthy dose of reality, its someone with only the threat of being troubled with the least of our worries, and screaming in agony as though its the worst pain imaginable. Last I checked, she still lives in a giant house, has the bills paid for and can go to any hospital of her choice without fear of losing the aforementioned house.


    Her entire career has been about her flaunting herself as being stupid, lazy, prettier with a holier-than-thou attitude. As a result, she's been rewarded by being richer, more famous, getting constant attention for doing nothing and receiving the company of other famous vapid people. So forgive me for a moment if I don't have the same internal struggle some of you may suffer from when I see life finally cornered her just for a moment and managed to give her a minor inconvenience before someone paid her an ungodly amount of money to help make it go away.

    Miss Simpson has NO idea what real strife is. I'll be the first to step up and say losing weight is an eternal struggle- especially in an industry where any who is less than anorexic is considered fair game for ridicule. I recall her battle with body fat was going on long before she had a child. But she's never had the same problem most of the 99% have had, or been threatened with. The fact that so many of you assholes out there continue to give her constant attention especially for things that have nothing to do with her career is what continues to keep her around. I mean, can any of you even remember the last album or movie she's done without looking it up?

    She might have understood a real struggle if she had lost all her
    money. She might have understood if someone expected something out of
    her that would require real effort...perhaps effort that would take away
    from her child for most of its waking hours. In the history of women, especially in the last century women have been making progress in real struggles: the right to vote, the right to own property, the right not BE property, the endless struggle for wage equality, the right to be able to control their reproductive rights and so many more. Simpson's "struggle" was that she foolishly (what other way would she do it) signed a contract for a lump of cash expecting her do do something unrealistic, or certainly unlikely. And now she wants to tell all the world, like she's now the chief expert at trying to lose unwanted weight as though she's been locked away in some death camp made for people bigger than a size 5...and will doubt make more money for doing so.

    There isn't a violin small enough to play this sob song.

  • aryastark

    Never been pregnant and have no intention of being pregnant. I also hate Jessica Simpson so I have no stake in this discussion really. But in defense of Weightwatchers, it's a credible diet and it works for me. Pity they had to use a bimbo who couldn't even do it properly as their spokeswoman,

  • dahlia6

    This easy weightloss bullshit they cram down people's throats makes me ill. I spent a year in college subsisting on three of the teeny-tiny Hersheys candy bars a day, the kind that are the size of a postage stamp, and all the Maalox I could drink. I gained 40 pounds due to the medicine my doctor put me on, without informing me that was one of the side effects. He later had the nerve to call me a fatass even though I was starving myself trying to counterbalance the weight gain by NOT EATING. I ended up being thrown out of his office by three very large nurses who put me in a group headlock and kindly asked me never to return after I vaulted the examination table in an attempt to beat him to death with a speculum. What can I say, being that hungry all the time makes you angry.

    Several years later, I gained and lost over 80 pounds in one year. My weight yoyos like insanity in a Lohan. The truth of the matter is this: you have to eat healthy. Smaller portions. And you have to move your ass. A lot. More than you would ever want to. And you have to keep doing it. If you don't have a nanny, a personal chef, and a support group, it is all on you, and its hella hard. By pretending that these select and blessed few hold the keys to the kingdom of weight loss, we're just making it harder on everyone else in the long run, and we're not doing our children or ourselves any favors. Some people can lose weight by skipping a few meals, but most people have a lot harder a time of it. We need to stop looking for a magic bullet, and stop looking to these pampered princesses to show us how to take care of ourselves.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    you have to eat healthy. Smaller portions. And you have to move your ass. A lot.

    Aw, Susan Powter is back.
    I miss her.

  • dahlia6

    I have been thinking about shaving my head recently.

  • intheyear2000

    I think the main problem is the 'oh gosh, i'm just like you!' approach. The woman has CRAZY MONEY and also probably *at least* one nanny, a trainer, personal chef, maid, personal assistant etc. . . .
    . . .And no 9-to-5.
    And she's using the fact that she doesn't have the typical hollywood body type to pander to women who gave birth and still have to work full time, cook, clean, run errands and all that without the nanny, personal assistant etc.
    My problem isn't that she is bullsh!tting about the 'numbers', it's the I'm just like you! thing.

  • not that its part of the general discussion, but she looks way sexier when she is "big". she probably could have gotten a lot of publicity by saying, 'i like the way i am, and i'm still hot'. shoved all the trash talk back in people's faces

  • TheReinaG

    I went to high school with her; she wasn't particularly mean, but she wasn't the "OMG, I love everyone" sweet syrupy sap she seems to try and sell either. Most of what I remember of her, she was absolutely a blistering moron and treated the other people in the theatre department as though they were a below her. I should go dig through some old shit and see if I have any footage of her in one of our musicals.

  • TheReinaG

    Not only that, this isn't the first time she's signed up to have her body the center of attention; I seem to recall that she went all over the place gushing about whatever it was she did to get down to that Daisy Duke weight.

  • Mijo

    She looks like a Bratz doll in that interview. Pretty damn creepy.

  • jane

    I think she gained like 70 pounds, though. She didn't gain a small amount that was just baby. She gained a lot more than just baby so I think her deal was to lose a lot more than just baby.

  • She basically gained a 2nd grader.

  • Slash

    Jesus ... she (can't remember where I read this, but remembering the pictures of her when she was still packing a fetus, I believe it) put on 70 fucking pounds. She said she ate whatever the hell she wanted, she didn't even try to moderate her diet.

    That's why it's so hard to lose the weight. Because most of it isn't "baby weight," it's "eating for 5" weight. Baby weight (which is obviously not all baby) is supposed to be, at most, 25 pounds.

    And regardless of her weight, I still think she's cute as hell. Not any sort of role model, really, but ... she's a celebrity. And not the smartest one, either. So people should probably consider that.

    And the Weight Watchers commercial is goddam hilarious. The first one I've ever seen where the celebrity is shown only from the neck up. They didn't even take advantage of her huge ta-tas, which was a poor directorial decision, if you ask me. I mean, one of the few advantages of being overweight (esp. post-baby) is you get those bountiful cans to compensate (that's what men say, anyway).

  • Stephen Nein

    I would kiss lips that can do that. That is all.

  • BWeaves

    'And, now, she’s going on a media blitz, talking about how she wouldn’t
    appear in a full body shot in her Weight Watchers ad because she “didn’t
    want it to be about her weight.”'

    HUH? How is this not about her weight? There's a reason it's called WEIGHT Watchers.

  • ZombieMrsSmith

    Here's what I learned about losing weight after having a baby.
    1. Every woman pretty much loses the weight—some more quickly than others.
    2. What a woman loses is approximately how much she gained during the pregnancy.
    3. If a woman is thin before getting pregnant, she will be thin again, but things will be distributed a little differently.
    4. If a woman is overweight before getting pregnant, she will have to work longer to lose more weight than what she gained during the pregnancy, and yes, things will be distributed differently for them too.

    THAT SAID Why the heck can't WW and Simpson agree that expecting her to get down to 100 lbs isn't realistic, not now, not ever, not for her.

    This is the thing I have the hardest time explaining to my tween daughter. Genetics can be cruel, but bodies just come in different shapes and sizes.

    My only criticism of Simpson is that she needs a better stylist and, as the Fug Girls say, no one will know if you go up a size, cause Jeez, too tight clothing just makes everyone look chubbier.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    I can't watch the video - they wanted her down to 100lbs?! That is stupid. I know she's short, but still...

    I would disagree with your 1 statement up there - I think *most* women lose *most* of the weight.

  • anikitty

    The WW healthy weight loss guidelines are 1/2-2 lbs per week. So 100 in 5 months is probably not attainable.

  • $27019454

    Is this where I jump in and assert that "I can't hate her because she will never know the love of a rainbow or puppies/kitties/baby otters and other simple pleasures?"

    Nah. That's been done, man.

    But I can't hate her. Because I don't give a rat's fat ass.

  • the other courtney

    I think, if she were more forthcoming, it would make everyone feel better. That is to say, "I was going to have to lose the weight anyway, so I figured why not do the Weight Watchers thing and make some bank. But DAMN Y'ALL it's HARD! I swear I thought it would all melt away but not so much. I look like fried ass nekkid, so until/if I ever get back into those Daisy Dukes, I'm just going to have to suck it up and wear black tunics all the time. Heidi Klum I ain't."

  • Jezzer

    I find it difficult to think of Jessica Simpson as "CHAMPION OF REAL WOMEN EVERYWHERE" when she was at her most famous when she looked like this: If she hadn't looked like that in the past, we would have no fucking clue who she is today.

  • $27019454

    O my god I swear she looks JUST like that guy from the Jackass movies!!

    Who's the stick lady on the right?

  • Uriah_Creep

    Best laugh I've had today. Thanks, Klingy.

  • googergieger

    So for us that need a celebrities for dummies guide, she is like what? A tier above the Kardashian level of celebrity? Yet somehow not as rich?

  • alwaysanswerb

    I think she deserves a few tiers above Kardashian. She was initially a singer, and had a decent-ish voice if I remember correctly (at least compared to her contemporaries at the time.) Then she has done some acting, and now she's in fashion. Her public persona appears to be about as intelligent as a box of rocks, but she at least did something other than get pissed on to be famous, and she seems to have, at the very least, a good eye for what trends to bring into her fashion line. Lots of other celebs who try to cross over into fashion can't even really figure that much out -- the Kardashians are in fact a good example, as every clothing item branded Kardashian I've seen has been tacky as all hell.

  • alwaysanswerb

    I agree with most of this. But not this:

    "THAT SAID. She took the deal. Therefore, she is the one who made it about her body."

    Her body has been public discussion ever since she entered the spotlight, and especially once she started gaining weight, and PARTICULARLY once she became pregnant. So, I think this is slightly more true:

    "She willingly participated in a huge series of negotiations all about
    her physical appearance for the sole purpose of using said physical
    appearance to sell a product"

    Rather than having the conversation take place around her without her, she chose to participate in it and essentially be paid for what people expected her to do anyway. All other points aside, this seems to me to be kind of a smart way to reclaim the inevitable conversation the public is having.

  • Artemis

    Yeah, exactly. Her weight has been the subject of intense media scrutiny since before the Daisy Duke days, and it reached rabid-dog pitch during her pregnancy. Yeah, she chose to cash in on it (and honestly, of all of the weight loss schemes out there, WW is probably one of the better ones -- it's certainly more healthy than whatever Slimfast/South Beach/GOOP-approved diet is currently the hottest thing), but there's no way you can claim with a straight face that Jessica Simpson's the one who made this all about her body. That was already the story and had been for quite some time.

  • TheEmpress

    This might make me really unpopular, but I think it's really weird when women basically act like being pregnant is a free pass to eat any/everything in creation. Yes, you need additional calories, but not an extra 3000 a day. By all means, don't restrict yourself, but does a growing fetus really benefit by your diet of Triple Bacon Whoppers and Reese's Peanut Butter Cup cheesecake topped with mayonnaise? You can't really do that and then wonder why it was so hard for you to lose weight afterward; that ain't baby weight, that's just fat.

  • Ren

    You need to factor in that Simpson probably had a massively controlled diet prior to pregnancy. Going from massively restricted, with a ton of exercise, to "seemingly" no restrictions and a socially accepted time to indulge can play hell with your eating habits. I can only speak for myself but I used to massively control my diet and exercise like a maniac. I was never very thin, but this allowed my body to reach a "normal" female size. Some people are gifted with a metabolism or the ability to eat normal portions. My body had to run on a very monitored amount and lots of running to even maintain. When I could actually eat what I wanted it was like release. I absolutely overindulged a bit. Going from one extreme to another is just absolutely confusing sometimes. My ability to see what was a sensible healthy portion was shot for awhile, but I learned how to rebalance eventually (in a much healthier way then before).

    All of the pregnant women I have known have been very conscious about following the weight gain that their doctors suggest. My heavier friends have often been very limited in weight gain and their doctor's suggestions have been followed. They actually ate BETTER during pregnancy in comparison to their prior habits. Does it suck sometimes...yes often it does, but it's been better for the mother and child.

  • Cree83

    Have you ever had one of those horrible hangovers that lasts the entire day, where you're just immersed in nausea, spend the morning curled up on the bathroom floor, you're run down, you have no energy, and you think to yourself: man, I need something in my stomach, and spaghetti is the only thing that sounds good right now. If I just had a plate of spaghetti, I'd feel better. And you eat the spaghetti, but then you're even more nauseous. And you think, Ok, but a little chocolate would put me right. So you have some, but that doesn't do the trick either. So you try a grilled cheese. Or a milk shake. Basically anything you can think of to stop the horrible hungover feeling. But despite what your body thinks it wants, nothing actually works except going to sleep and waking up the next day.

    That's what pregnancy is like every single day*. A horrible, shitty, 6-too-many-shots-of-tequila hangover that doesn't just go away after a night of sleep. It lasts and lasts and lasts. Yeah, you shouldn't eat whatever you want, but it's hard to argue with a body that feels like complete and utter shit ALLLLL the time.

    *All pregnancies are different, your milage may vary.

  • MissE

    To add: we all know that our diets overall aren't exactly spectacular, so our preggo bodies go into overdrive for any missing "elements." Identifying what the hell it is your body wants is a struggle, and a lot of times, the body is dealing with glucose levels to the point where the physical craving for that fatty sugar is undeniable.

  • i've known a fair number of women who were pregnant, and i wouldn't think what you describe is the norm or average. and i have known a couple of women who love being pregnant, and glow and say they feel at their best, and they were also the one's who got the biggest and tended to stay in that direction.

  • AM

    Gotta speak up for the other side here. I'm currently in my 8th month, I've gained about 17 pounds and I never had a moment of nausea the whole time. If anything I'm less interested in food because I get uncomfortably full very quickly. Between not drinking a bottle of wine every other night and the reduced size of my tum, I'm probably eating better than I used to and I've only gained weight in my stomach, not all over. SO yes, every pregnancy is different and it's not inevitable that you will have the cravings/nausea.

  • Samantha

    OMG thank you for saying it. Being pregnant is like being hungover: You don't know how it happened and you swear you will never do it again.

  • Cuca10

    That. Is the honest to God truth. And the cravings are very real. Cold-sweat, shaky-hands, uber-salivation real.

    For me, loosing weight after baby #1 was a struggle. But 18 months later, when I got baby #2, it was a breeze, because with a newborn and a toddler, I simply had no time to eat. Ever. And if by some chance I had 10 minutes of peace and quiet, I chose to take a nap, every time. When 2 years later I got baby #3, I was simply too frazzled to give a shit. All in all, loosing the baby weight is not particulary hard, not more than loosing regular weight. But to loose the post-birth flab? That's a whole different box of chocolates.

  • AngelenoEwok

    I was super waffly about having my own biological children, but you have just sealed it for me. Between this and the after-baby-hairloss, eek. No. I can't. I refuse. Moms of the world, you are just better than me.

  • athena23

    To be fair, the hair loss only happens because it stops shedding while you're pregnant. It just all happens to catch up and start shedding again in a few frightening clumps. Really, hormones are weird, weird things during pregnancy; they can make your feet grow a size, darken your hair, make your nails grow--all things that have nothing to do with actually having a baby. Aaaand...I did nothing to convince you that it's not a scary thing, did I?
    Seriously, it's truly different for everyone. I had not a moment of nausea, nor did my feet grow a size, but my vision got worse and my hair is a different color. Mother Nature is one capricious chickie-poo.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    For some reason, I'm paranoid I'll end up with curly hair like my sisters if I get pregnant. And allergies. I'm one of the few people in the family without curly hair or allergies.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I'm more horrified by her fashion icon status than anything else. She dresses terribly despite the fact that she can afford a stylist AND she has a billion dollar clothing business. That's the part that mystifies me.

    I agree with all of your "that saids" and even in that order. Bottom line: You just know Weight Watchers had a back up plan in place in case she didn't make her weight. "She didn't lose the weight quickly? Why should she have to, you judgemental bastards! Sign up for more WW" Oh, she did lose the weight,"Sign up for more WW". It's marketing genius! And she is the smartest stupid person in the world.

    She is gorgeous. She can actually sing (though she doesn't sing anything I actually want to listen to). She has made a very canny career out of being "charmingly" ignorant. It would be impressive, if it weren't so repugnant.

  • Carlito

    She doesn't "have a billion dollar clothing business" nor is she a billionaire as Courtney says. She sold the master license of her clothing brand back in 2005 for an advance worth far less. As the name on the shoes, at best she's earning a small percentage of the wholesale revenue, which still puts her very well off, but nowhere near the totals pushed in all the gossip magazines.

  • beartato

    Thank you. I have no idea how people so drastically misunderstand this point.

  • The Other Agent Johnson

    Sweet merciful crap. I have no idea why people know this many details about Jessica freakin' Simpson's life and finances.

  • beartato

    That's not knowing details about her life and finances. That's ten, maybe twenty seconds of critical thinking.

  • Carlito

    I didn't previously. It didn't seem to pass the common sense test that she would be a billionaire. A less than one minute in duration internet search later, I had my answer.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Then she must really need the money and she should have worked hard to meet her Weight Watchers contractual obligations.

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    Who is this again?

  • Gauephat

    I guess I've got a skewed perspective, because the only person I'm really close to who has had a baby recently is my older sister. She dropped the weight super fast just from breastfeeding, returning to what she looked like before within three months and staying that way.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Just out of curiousity, how old is your sister? Because those things definitely depend on DNA and age.

  • Gauephat


  • THAT SAID. She was going to try to lose weight ANYWAY - why not get paid for it?

    This is the extent of my ability to care about this issue.

  • John G.

    According to the rules of shia labeouf, in the book of labeouf, if she wants to be taken seriously she needs to grow a beard and have unsimulated sex in a Lars von Trier movie.

  • Snath

    THAT SAID. Jessica Simpson is just as hypocritical as most of Hollywood. I find it hard to garner any enthusiasm for anything she does.

    Chicken of the sea. Fuck.

  • DenG

    This chick is playing the game way better than Kim K. et al. Whatever the market will bear. Damn you, market.

  • Natallica

    Well, I think homegirl just can't have it both ways. She WILLINGLY entered a plan when she was actually, I think, even encouraged to put on weight. It is a publicitary move, after all, not an actress just having that body type and getting shit for not fitting in the skinny mold. So, yeah, fuck her. Her baby is adorable, though.

  • Natallica

    (I should have DEFINITELY said "homegirl can't have her cake and eat it too". It would have been more fitting)

  • Nimue

    I don't think I can every forgive her for flat out saying she deliberately acts dumber than she is because boys like it and she doesn't want to seem too smart because it is threatening and she didn't want to scare men away. Yes, she said this (not verbatim) in print. That's when I washed my hands of her and I refuse to defend her ever.

  • I look like fried ass nekkid, so until/if I ever get back into those Daisy Dukes, I'm just going to have to suck it up and wear black tunics all the time. Heidi Klum I ain't."

  • SabrinaStillReallyHateDisqus

    Hey Pajeeba - don't you hate when you switch to a new (annoying) comment system, with one of the main expected benefits being easier spam detection and deletion, but it winds up letting spambots more easily create convincing comments that escape detection?

    Yeah, I hate when that happens to me, too.

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