Kid Rock Came for Beyonce--Now the Beyhive Comes for Kid Rock
It is a fact of celebrity life: do not attempt to take down another celebrity unless you are on the same plane of existence as that celebrity. So, if you are, say, Kid Rock, an ingrown pube on the taint of music, you do not dare speak ill of our lord, queen and savior, Beyoncé Giselle Knowles-Carter.
In Rolling Stone, Kid Rock (and no, I don’t have any idea why they interviewed him other than journalism is dying) shared the following gems, indicative of why he’s such an enduring star and artist:
In the latest issue of Rolling Stone, the singer detailed why he’s “flabbergasted” by the intense Beyoncé fandom. “Beyoncé, to me, doesn’t have a fucking ‘Purple Rain,’ but she’s the biggest thing on Earth,” he said. “How can you be that big without at least one ‘Sweet Home Alabama’ or ‘Old Time Rock & Roll’?”
His criticism quickly turned to not understanding the physical attraction to the singer. “People are like, ‘Beyoncé’s hot. Got a nice fucking ass.’ I’m like ‘Cool, I like skinny white chicks with big tits.’ Doesn’t really fucking do much for me.”
He seems sweet. Like a cupcake made of old tuna and some Pennzoil scraped off the garage floor.
Now, most fans of any given celebrity are quite intense. But no fandom is as intense as the Beyhive. These individuals put the Sherlock fandom to fetal shame. They will fuck your shit up if you mess with their queen. And Kid Rock? He messed.
So, now, the Beyhive has attacked in the greatest way: by swarming his Instagram with pictures of bees.
This is the most delightful and adorable protest I’ve ever seen. Of course, it could turn deadly at any time. Don’t ask how, but I managed to get ahold of some video of Kid Rock being attacked by Beygency operatives.
If Kid Rock was even slightly more relevant, maybe there was something he could do about this. But, instead, we get to reap all the benefits of this phenomenal happening. Thanks, Beyhive. Thanks, bees.
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