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If You Do Not Meet the Standards of Good Christian Katy Perry, She Will Throw Your Ass Under the Bus

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrities Are Better than You | March 5, 2014 | Comments ()


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Before I say this, I must remind you of the following: a) Katy Perry used to be a blond singer of Christian music named Katy Hudson before her management realized perpetuating faux-lesbian culture (as well as Asian and Muslim cultures) was much more profitable, and b) she has stated that she is “not a feminist, but I do believe in the strength of women” which is the definition of feminism.

So it is not particularly shocking that she has decided to speak out in “ew grody girl tongue” disgust about Miley Cyrus, who she recently kissed on camera at a concert.

“I just walked up to her to give her like a friendly girly kiss, you know, as girls do, and then she like tried to move her head and go deeper and I pulled away,” Perry said.

“God knows where that tongue has been,” she joked. “We don’t know! That tongue is so infamous!”

If you were wondering where Katy’s tongue has been most recently, I have three words for you: David Duke cock.

Of course, this isn’t the first time Katy Perry has spoken out against her peers in the industry, particularly Cyrus.

“I do see myself becoming this, whatever, inspiration out of default right now, ‘cause it’s such a strange world. Like females in pop - everybody’s getting naked. I mean, I’ve been naked before but I don’t feel like I have to always get naked to be noticed. But it’s interesting to see.”

Yeah, guys, you don’t need to get naked to be noticed.

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Listen to Katy. It’s all about the art.

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I mean really. When you’re talented, why try to get so much attention with what you’re wearing? Who needs to try that hard?

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I realize that the world of young female pop stars is not one of solidarity and sisterhood. But, for so many reasons, UGH, Katy Perry, you’re the worst. This is not very “Roar” of you (in terms of message, at least. It is very “Roar” in terms of utter shittiness.)




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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • Jebus SUCKS

    Katy Perry used to be a blond singer of Christian music named Katy Hudson she said it herself that she is now an ATHEIST and God can be whatever despite her parents who are both Pastors upbringing. For the most part the Christian Music industry is just a stepping stone to secular. How do I know? I have a few friends in the music industry and many are in Nashville trying to get that elusive music contract as so they can go secular.

  • Maddy

    Katy Perry says so much dumb stuff that I can't even be bothered to be offended by it

  • GrungellaCronk

    She's all spectacle and no soul.

  • manting

    So she is the pop singing female version of a broadway musical?

  • Sara_Tonin00

    BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  • manting

    what? Musicals have substance now? I will be sure to remember that the next time I see Cats, or Starlight Express, or Miss Saigon, or Phantom, or Sunset Blvd, or Les Mis, or Lion King. I went to all of the above because my mom loves musicals and I discovered one unifying theme - they are all flash and spectacle and no substance. Musicals are the stage equivalent of a Michael bay movie. Plays are where the substance is, at least in my experience. For example Les Miserables is much better book then musical, Sunset Blvd is a much better movie then musical, and Lion King is still just a Disney rip off of Kimba the White Lion no matter the medium.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Um, there have always been some musicals with substance (Showboat) and there have always been some without (Golddigggers of 1933). Your verdict is like judging all movies based on Michael Bay and Uwe Boll movies. Or all pop music on Katy Perry.

  • manting

    you mean Showboat from the movie Showboat? Musicals are like covers of better material in that they are often musical versions of better material. There are of course exceptions to this (Book of Mormon is a great example) but look at the Tony Awards list of winners and nominees from the past 30 years, so many of them are from movies, books, and other mediums in which they have already achieved commercial and critical success.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    differing from movies how....?

    Showboat was a book before it was a movie, and a musical before it was a movie. "Better" is subjective. We clearly disagree. My experience of a wide range of movies - not just the big splashy ones - is that yes, musicals can have substance.

  • meadowdancer

    I am laughing at how many people came out to slam Katy for her remarks. She has been a hypocrite about a lot of things so her being an ass towards Mikey was par for the course. Heck she made me like Russell Brand since after the divorce he never said one nasty thing about her but she kept giving repeated interviews about how awful he was and her dark depression (whatever girl).

    And I am glad someone noted she totally ripped off Brave. She sucks.

  • Martin Jensen

    Baby you're a firework

  • John W

    This reminds me of that time Paris Hilton criticized people who do porn.

  • stella

    For some reason I read that as Kate Hudson and was like, Katy Perry used to be Kate Hudson? That's weird.

  • John G.

    what is the deal with christians and judging other people?

  • Uriah_Creep

    It's in the mission statement.

  • e jerry powell

    I mean!

  • pasque

    Wait just a goddamn minute...so Miley started unwanted sexual contact, she reacted with discomfort and our response is to...slut shame her by implying she's "dirty" for oral sex? For shame. Pot and kettle.

  • Ingrid Today

    From Perry's description if sounds like Miley kissed her on her cheek and slightly misguided so she came close to Perry's precious mouth. It doesn't sound like she was intentionally trying to deep tongue Perry. It sounds like Perry is homophobic.

  • firedmyass

    You might have a valid point if that was actually what happened.

    (it was not)

  • Bryan

    Wow, well said. I'm no fan of either of them, but you make a great point.

  • dorothyeverytimesmurf

    ugh, now "i kissed a girl" is stuck in my head. who sang that again?

  • chanohack

    Your avatar makes this comment so much more bitchy and I ADORE IT.

  • dorothyeverytimesmurf

    everything i do, i try to do with maximum bitchery

  • luthien26

    Jill Sobule. :)

  • Al Borland's Beard

    "Katy Perry used to be a blond singer of Christian music named Katy Hudson before her management realized perpetuating faux-lesbian culture."

    After weeks of disappointing sales for her single "Kissed a Jesus" and some backlash against the song's title, Hudson and her team decided a change was in order.

  • BlackRabbit

    Lamb of God to Snoop Lion-still kind of Biblical.

  • Adam Matthews

    she is the blandest person in pop music (and…the world obviously)

  • Dove of Doom

    Whenever Katy Perry sings or speaks I'm always struck by what an intelligent, talented woman she isn't. It's good to know that even though she left her Christian music roots behind that she's still a selectively judgmental hypocrite.

  • Lloyd_The_Bartender

    in today's world of mainstream pop music you don't need talent or lessons or discipline because we have Pro Tools and auto-tuning. So you can now invest all of your energy into working out 6 hours a day and being completely and utterly full of shit !!!
    isn't that great ??

  • Mrs. Julien

    Today, I called out a reviewer on Amazon for slut-shaming the heroine of a historical romance novel in her comments. Because, you know, it's an entire genre about a woman's right to self-determination, but let us not be slatternly about it. This seemed like an appropriate place to mention it.

  • AvaLehra

    Was it The Awakening? I love that book. (Sorry, goofy tangent.)

  • Mrs. Julien

    Juliana Gray How to Master Your Marquis

    (Oy, with the titles, I know.)

  • AvaLehra

    How to Master Your Marquis! That's one of the best titles of a book I have not read.

  • Mrs. Julien

    You can also Tame Your Duke, and in June, you will be able to School Your Scoundrel.

    http://mrsjulien.wordpress.com...

  • DominaNefret

    I REALLY want to school my scoundrel.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Or at least a genre about a woman's right to slatternliness.

    I've got Slammerkin on my to-read pile. (such a huge to-read pile.) I think of you every time I catch a glimpse of the title.

  • BlackRabbit

    You get no credit unless you actually used the word "slatternly" or some version thereof.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I was thinking it. Does that count?

    It was an Amazon review. I was trying to contain myself.

  • BlackRabbit

    Very well. Next time, however, I expect at least the word "slatternesque".

  • Mrs. Julien

    I am seriously considering changing my Pajibanym to "Slatternesque".

  • BlackRabbit

    But then you would have to build your fame again, instead of simply carving a "J" with your rapier wit as you do presently. Of course, doing an "S" might ALSO be seen as a mark of devotion to your beloved Mr. Cavill, so follow your heart.

  • Mrs. Julien

    If I ever get the opportunity to be slatternesque with someone on Pajiba 5, my first choice is going to be Daniel Craig, but I suppose I could make do with Cavill if I could stop staring long enough.

  • BlackRabbit

    Wear one of those sleepy-blindfold things.

  • I think we need a holiday celebration called "slatternalia" There will be cocktails. Many.

  • Mrs. Julien

    You are awesome and I love you and I would like to request a virgin non-alcoholic strawberry margarita and a Henry Cavill tumblr.

  • Miss Jane

    Are you sure you don't mean a Henry Cavill tumble?

  • Mrs. Julien

    That'll work because, either way, oh my God, he is so good-looking.

  • BlackRabbit

    I'd buy a Red Death for everyone, since they are delicious drinks.

  • BWeaves

    She's worried that she doesn't know where Miley's tongue has been?
    It's been out in the air and all over her own face.

    If I was Katy Perry, I'd be more worried about where Russell Brand and John Mayer's tongues had been.

  • chanohack

    NOT TO MENTION THEIR WIENERS.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    An upvote for utter lack of subtlety (so appropos when discussing La Perry)

  • Sirilicious

    This is the first burngif i ever dealt. You earned it.

  • Sirilicious

    I guess i should have practiced dealing burns.

  • God Of Bal-Sagoth

    A for the effort.

  • Sirilicious

    Yay!

  • idiosynchronic

    This is why I have never been upset that she's been John Mayer's latest - I've only wondered why it's taken so long. Peas inna pod.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Of course it's "Roar" of her. If by "Roar" you mean, a knock off of a better pop song by someone who has both writing & performing talent while coincidentally not feeling the need to get naked.

    And those pictures seriously gross me out. I guess I'm playing MY old lady card, but they don't seem fun, they seem just gross.

  • Yeah...but those cans!!

  • andreana mccann

    My Uncle Aiden got an almost new cream
    Lincoln MKS Sedan by working part time off of a laptop. have a peek here J­u­m­p­9­9­9­.­ℂ­o­m

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    Oh he was working all right. He was working that crank while a gaggle of sleazy middle-aged business men were screaming "ass to ass!" at him.

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