If You’ve Ever Wanted To See Chris Evans Yell ‘I Hate My Penis,’ Now’s Your Chance

By Victoria McNally | Celebrity | April 4, 2017 |


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Jimmy Kimmel Live! sketches can be very hit or miss; sometimes they’re amazing! (ie: “I’m Fucking Matt Damon!”) Sometimes they rely on very tired, mean-spirited jokes and it gets a little old (ie: everything Jimmy Kimmel has ever said about Matt Damon since “I’m Fucking Matt Damon!”).

Last night, Chris Evans’ fake trailer for Dennis managed to be both; it’s set within a frustratingly banal framing device wherein Evans admits to stalking an average guy in Kimmel’s audience so he could star in a movie about how much the dude sucks. But the trailer itself, which boasts Chris Evans’ performance as “a tour de force of tragedy” while he’s being completely disgusting, is oddly hilarious (and starts 2:18 in):

If the gag were actually about prestige movies featuring white guys feeling sorry for themselves while actually being the worst, I’d have been super okay with that. If nothing else, at least we now have footage of Chris Evans crying over a toilet. I don’t know why, but it soothes me to see him so relatably, humiliatingly sad.

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