Charlie Sheen is an Awful Human Being, Part 6,539

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Charlie Sheen is an Awful Human Being, Part 6,539

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrities Are Better than You | November 7, 2013 | Comments ()


So, I would like to preface this by saying this is a sad story. Everything about this is terrible. There is nothing schadenfreudey or “That’s our Bieber!” *hair ruffle*-y fun. Everything is ugh. Just ugh.

Charlie Sheen is Charlie Sheen. His ex-wife, Brooke Mueller, is a very public drug addict - crack and meth, specifically — with more than 20 rehab stints in her past, two of them while pregnant, as well as a 5150 hold placed on her after a meth overdose just six months ago. Together, they have twin boys, who are 4 years old. These boys have been living with Denise Richards, another of Sheen’s ex-wives. Richards has alerted DCFS that she is no longer able to care for the twins because they are violent, threatening to kill her dogs and hitting and choking her daughters. Speculation is rampant that Richards’s letter is more of a desperate attempt to get help for the boys rather than trying to get them out of her house, but Mueller has refused to comply and, now, word is that she may have full custody back by Christmas.

In the Sheen of it all, Mueller has been awarded a temporary restraining order and gag order against him. Probably because he’s a violent and insane person, riddled with evil and filled with a soul that strongly resembles the after pictures on lung cancer brochures.

Here is a selection of his recent Twitter ramblings.




Nothing about this is good. Nothing ends well for anyone involved. Those poor boys. Poor Denise Richards. Poor almost everyone. Ugh. Just ugh.

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Ben

    I'm far more upset then I should be that he spelt Douche "Doosh"

  • emmelemm

    It takes a lot to make me feel sorry for Denise Richards, but.... Boom. There it is.

  • Byakko

    Why is it unsurprising that he can't spell "douche bag" correctly?

  • Jezzer

    You'd think he would have encountered the word enough by now to be familiar with its spelling.

  • Zilla2014

    Just give them to Eliza Dusku. According to Pajiba, she loves her twins more than anybody

  • kirbyjay

    What about Eliza Dushku? She doesn't even have kids, does she? Am I missing something?

  • Zilla2014

    Boob joke, probably would've worked better on the Dushku post

  • Bad Superman

    If after millions of years of evolution, women don't know to not have children with someone like this, then they're solely responsible. Denise, Brooke et al. The Charlie Sheen types are the ones you have fun with, the 'bad-boys' of this world. You don't marry them, you don't have their children. Mothers are supposed to pass-on what they have learned to their daughters, before it's too late.

  • Bad Superman

    This many down-votes tells me nobody's learned a goddamned thing. Ted Bundy managed to father three children whilst on Death-Row. What else do you need to know?

  • BlackRabbit

    There's a lack of knowledge here, that much is true. We disagree on the exact location, sir.

  • Bert_McGurt

    Notwithstanding the raging misogyny of your viewpoint, this helps the children in this situation HOW, exactly?

  • StefJam

    Ah yes the ole boys-will-be-boys, if-he's-an-abusive-asshole-it's-your-fault-for-being-such-a-skank theory.

  • Maguita NYC

    After centuries of trying to teach their daughters not to marry these guys, you think they'd realize it is time to start teaching their sons not to beat up and try to kill women.


  • AngelenoEwok

    I wanna marry you.

  • Maguita NYC

    If you get rid of that husband of yours, I might consider it! ;)

  • Guest

    Can we just talk about Eliza Dusku's twins?

  • bastich

    I know this is a delicate topic, and I'm probably a bad person for asking, but....

    How do you suck off a parking lot?

  • Ironically, the same way you get to Carnegie Hall. Just with very different results.

  • Maguita NYC

    By watching for bumps.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Rule #1: Watch the teeth.

    (The asphalt could very easily break or chip one.)

  • I like to start with some vigorous jaw-loosening exercises.

  • bastich

    Good idea. Also, we're talking some serious gag reflex suppression here.

  • Yeah, I mean, in my experience, a person should work their way up to parking lots. Start with say, cucumbers, and go from there.

  • bastich

    So, in conclusion:

    1. Cucumbers
    2. Parking lots
    3. PROFIT!

  • Maguita NYC

    I thought all roads lead to rehab.

  • bastich

    In this case, it appears they would lead to rehab *and* major dental reconstruction.

  • Maguita NYC

    F*cking Meth!

  • How on earth is Charlie Sheen not rotting in a jail cell? He shot Kelly Preston while she was pregnant, among other things! Why is he not being contained or punished? Why does he keep getting work? Why doesn't anyone in the Sheen/Estevez family step in?

    And now these poor kids. They clearly need help and it seems like Richards is the only one trying to get it for them. Stuff like this is so depressing and disappointing and it makes me wonder if half of this shit would've been allowed to happen if there weren't celebrities involved.

  • emmalita

    In situations with long-term crazy, things get complicated. There is probably a very good reason why the elder Sheens aren't stepping in publicly. One thing addicts do really well is play people off each other. It's often a deliberate strategy to have one person be visibly involved, so there are fewer options for manipulation. Denise has her own resources and has leverage over her ex-husband that other people do not. I don't know what is actually happening, but I suspect there is a lot more going on than we see.

  • That's very, very sad, but that also makes a lot of sense. And, like you said, this is very long term, so it's likely the family has been through the wringer a while and have experienced this kind of manipulation.

  • Maguita NYC

    I don't know if it was said upthread, and I apologize if it already was, but I believe Martin Sheen had reported his son for drug possession, and had him do hard time for it.

    After such an experience, and seeing how sadly it had failed, he probably thinks the best thing for him is to stay away. The situation must be breaking his heart however.

  • Did he really? I had no idea. I must've missed that. I'm glad that at the very least, his behavior hasn't gone entirely unchecked this whole time.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Unfortunately, things like this happen all the time. We just don't hear about them. The world is full of broken people harming those around them and of good people trying to help.

  • That's a very good point! It must happen every day with similar players. It's like one of those things where when you see something horrible like this, you try to rationalize how it must be unique or separate in some way to preserve a sense of okayness with the world.

  • Mrs. Julien

    At the risk of giving people the benefit of the doubt, I would imagine
    that the people at DCFS are horrified by the situation and hamstrung by
    procedures or legalities. I sincerely doubt that anyone goes to work for an organization like that thinking, "So what if the children are vulnerable? I don't really like kids anyway. I want to be overworked and underpaid". It must be an often heartbreaking job trying to help people within a fractured system.

  • Well called, Mrs. J. It's entirely possible that something's rotten in Denmark, but what seems more realistic is that a shload of well-intentioned bureaucratic rules are being applied in "the fairest way possible" - meaning uniformly, when these tragedies are anything but uniform. If you just went by the paperwork, it would almost surely be possible to take another mother with different circumstances and turnaround potential, and make her fit the same case profile. Whatever chances you give her, you have to give Brooke Mueller, whether it makes sense or not. It sucks. Just like it sucks when selfish assholes have children.

    EDIT - That said, I sincerely and fervently hope that someone at DCFS is able and willing to follow Denise's clear cue and give her whatever authority she needs to get these boys help, before something even more tragic occurs. No one can force Brooke Mueller to be a decent mother, but if she doesn't want the job, she shouldn't be allowed to prevent someone else from doing it.

  • emmalita


  • simplysarah

    Denise Richards is a saint for attempting to step up and raise these boys when their parents are obviously incapable of it.

  • Pinky McLadybits

    I can't begin to properly express the frustration and disbelief involved when I see something like this. Why can celebrities publicly be such pieces of shit but keep getting jobs while people who post photos on their PERSONAL FACEBOOK can get fired because their fiance is grabbing their fully-covered boob. I understand NOTHING.

  • Daniel Valentin

    The fact that Denise Richards actually made the attempt to take care of the boys, boys she has NO LEGAL OBLIGATION to take care of on account of not being biologically hers, speaks VOLUMES about her. The lady's a SAINT.

  • apsutter

    I've been watching this story for the past year or so and I have gained so much respect for that woman.

  • Paige Record-Needlescratch

    Seriously. I was never a fan of her (nothing against her, just didn't care for her work or the fact that she got with Sheen's disgusting ass), but I have so much respect for her as a human being now.

  • Wicked

    Wow, crazy bitches everywhere. How unfortunate for these boys.

  • Tammy

    President Bartlett, it's time you swept in to raise your grandsons. The nation needs you.

  • Bert_McGurt

    Their uncle has also shown himself to be quite adept at reforming ragtag groups of children. So he'll have help!

  • NateMan

    1 T at the end of Bartlet. Which always looks wrong. But otherwise I agree entirely!

  • Maguita NYC

    So that's 1 Tablespoon at the end not two. Got it, thks.

  • Mrs. Julien

    If it's lower case, they are teaspoons.

    The Accuracy Police are coming for me, aren't they?

  • bastich

    Seeing as they look like this, I think you should be fine:

  • Maguita NYC

    Disqus has apparently broken my upvote, so please know:

  • Well what do you expect, just upvoting here and there willynilly? Upvotes used to MEAN SOMETHING.

  • Maguita NYC

    Are you calling Bastich Willynilly?

    No wonder he cries after masturbating!

  • Ha! I cracked up at that. I bow to your mastery of wordplay!

  • bastich

    How did Sassafrass Green find out my stripper name?!?

  • Maguita NYC

    This explains EVERYTHING!

  • bastich

    Thank you!

    I think the Disqus just has it out for me.

    /tightens straps on tinfoil hat

  • Mrs. Julien

    It's not often I quote Ross Geller, but "EW! NO!"

  • bastich

    Sorry, best I could do. I couldn't find any "Henry Cavill dressed as a cop" pics on the old Google Viewfinder....

  • Mrs. Julien

    I couldn't find Daniel Craig dressed as one either.

  • Maguita NYC

    We can pretend he is dressed as a Wall Street cop.

  • Mrs. Julien


  • Maguita NYC

    But NateMan is suggesting a tablespoon, with a capital T...
    Was he being too generous? :D

  • Mrs. Julien

    Worse, he was being inaccurate!

  • ZombieNurse

    Here is what I don't understand: How can anyone - his family, DCFS - anyone not see that neither of their parents are capable of taking care of these kids? I'm not saying to send them into the foster system or anything like that, but someone else, in his family at least, could afford to take them out of this situation. Why aren't they? This is heart breaking.

  • Naye

    The problem is that DCFS is pretty much handing them to Brooke,while Denise is trying to take care of them. But Denise can't take care of violent kids, that are only violent when around their junkie mom, which DCFS doesnt seem to think is an issue.

  • NateMan

    It's easy to judge from the outside - who knows, maybe they've tried and been rejected, maybe they just can't bring that much chaos into their own lives. It's never easy. I wish to hell it was.

  • Naye

    He's violent and insane, but it is worth, very worth, noting that Denise can no longer care for the boys because AFTER DCFS gave Brooke unsupervised visitation with the twins, they then became very increasingly violent after every visit with her, when they had previously adjusted to living with Denise.

    Charlie has fully supported Denise while taking care of the kids, and Brooke has not only blocked him from seeing the boys, but because (at the time) the boys lived with Denise that meant he also could not see the girls he has with Denise, which is probably a part of his reaction to her as well. Charlie sheen is deplorable, clearly missing a lot of his sanity, but the Mueller woman is a nightmare, and DCFS is helping her.

    Mueller is also blocking any therapy the boys might get by refusing to submit them for evaluations

  • axis2clusterB

    This. Exactly this. DCFS is so fucking eager to get the kids back with their mom, because that's obviously ALWAYS the best place for kids, they're ignoring signs of severe physical/mental abuse. The whole situation makes me nauseous. I absolutely believe that Brooke is in it for the child support.

  • apsutter

    Spot on. Brooke is a piece of shit who should have had her parental rights stripped already but instead might retain custody of them. Does she have to kill one of them from neglect for child services to actually do anything about it?

  • Maguita NYC

    Not to be a cynic, but after all Brooke has done, it seems to me she is only interested in getting the boys for child support.

    There is no hiding from the truth, the woman is an addict and would do anything to get money for her addiction. She needs to be kept away until her sobriety has been proven beyond the shadow of a doubt.

  • Maguita NYC

    The only losers in this situation are the boys. Someone should take pity and make sure none of their parents get access to them ever again. Just give them a stable safe home already.

    And if the choking and beatings are true, they should be in therapy. No ifs or buts about it.

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