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A Gold Digger Can’t Catch a Break

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrities Are Better than You | July 21, 2010 | Comments ()


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In the weeks since we discovered Mel Gibson's talent for fist dentistry and penchant for blow jobs under the penalty of arson, one thing has become abundantly clear: To an unsettling number of people, it's all her fault.

When we first met Oksana Grigorieva, she was a humble Russian homewrecker, one many assumed was at least co-responsible for the destruction of Gibson's 26-year marriage. Within days of their first public appearance, it was announced she was pregnant with his child.

After the public lost interest, we didn't hear much until the breakup and the subsequent implications of abuse. And then the tapes happened.

We're now six tapes in, each tape full of solid gold nuggets of lady hate, the latest including what's become standard fare like, "You need a fucking kick up the ass for being a bitch, cunt, gold digging whore." Maybe it's just because at this point, "bitch, cunt, gold digging whore" might be just how Mel says "good morning" but I'm no longer as disturbed by what he's saying as I am by the comment threads on the websites posting it.

Just like when Chris Brown beat Rhianna into near-unconsciousness, the idiot dipshit brigade has come out in full force favor of the attacker. Because, you see, the bitch had it coming. She mouthed off. When will you silly vagina-havers ever learn?

Here's a few examples:

  • "This woman is a lowlife garbage can. It is obvious that she is setting up Mel Gibson. Mel Gibson's ex wife of 26 years has come out and said that Mel has never been violent or abusive. Also, the tapes are inadmissible in court, and now all of the sudden she is trying to come up with witnesses. Very sad... this Oksana woman is disgusting."

  • "Gibson's camp isn't releasing anything to the publice so as not to anger the judge the way Oksana already has. Listen to what she's saying next time you hear the tapes. Wait until all evidence is revealed to the public before blindly believeing everything a woman says."

  • "Insane!!! I dont believe this woman!!! Money !!! Money !!! I dont want want Mel`s career ruined because of this > I love his movies and I want to see more."

  • "This Gold-digger was Mel's biggest mistake -- she obviously followed thru with her extortion plan by recording him without his knowledge in the home of his daughter. She pulled the oldest trick in the book - getting pregnant to lay claim to his bank account. At least he was smart enough not to marry her. It's always been reported that he was a great dad --and now the media sides with the Russian ho for headlines. Shame on them he is trying to do what's right for his child...when many men would have just walked away. Two thumbs up for Mel --I hope she gets jail for her plot and he gets his daughter."

    What's fucked up is these comments are all (purportedly) from women. Illiterate ones apparently, but women nonetheless.

    Gibson's family has come forward to say they stand by their Melly. Of course they do. If they don't, he might Rockatansky them in the jawbone, then bury them in the flower bed. His ex-wife stands by him too. And by that I mean she stands by her alimony.

    Radar Online, better known as "Mel Gibson's Emporium of Expletives and Oral Sex Demands," is not helping. It does little to dissuade people from thinking Oksana is the leaker (though she probably is) and somehow therefore deserving the sugar tits treatment by featuring horrific recordings of her violent abuse littered with links like "PHOTOS: Oksana Shows Off Her Post Baby Body."

    Dustin wrote yesterday about our tendency to root for violence in film, unless it's violence against women. This is very true. And yet, in this real life instance of violence against a woman, people root on. Was she a gold digger? Of course. Did she leak the tapes? Oh, totally. Did she in any way have it coming or deserve it? Fuck off.

    Aside from abuse, misogyny, racism and victim battling, you know what the worst part is? Motherfucker gave at least four flicks worth of material to Friedberg and Seltzer. I assume Vampires Suck is being re-edited as we speak. "I am going to burn this house down. But you are going to bite me first. *ball kick, piano drops on head* Avatar was a popular movie! Fart."

    ****

    Now that all that's out of the way, 'hi,' I'm new here. I'm not Canadian, but I am from Illinois which is basically the same thing. I like cupcakes and Neko Case and the movie The Crush and hate Katherine Heigl and the band Train. I have written for a couple Rifftrax, I used to work for a Kennedy, I have a dog named Annie Hall and I would appreciate it if you liked me.

    Follow Courtney Enlow on Twitter, and read her other stuff at HoboTrashcan.com.



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