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This Week in 'Jesus Christ, Celebrities Are Hot'


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You might not know this about celebrities, but many of them are incredibly attractive. I don’t think I’m breaking any new ground in making that pronouncement, but here’s something else you may already know: When they got it, they flaunt it.

For instance, have you seen this photo of Matthew Lewis, otherwise known as Neville Longbottom? This is an outtake from a celebrity photoshoot. They couldn’t actually include it in the magazine because it would catch on fire.

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Meanwhile, in a photo presumably without a speck of photoshop magic, Chrissy Teigen continues to push the boundaries over on Instagram by posting beach photos of her ass.

A photo posted by @chrissyteigen on

Here’s the correct reaction to that photo.

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Meanwhile, here’s Gwendoline Christie for Viviane Westwood’s new clothing line that seeks to blur the line between male and female fashion. I think that means that both men and women find Gwendoline Christie incredibly hot.

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Elsewhere, here’s Gal Gadot, who will play Wonder Woman and Batman vs. Superman. She is not hard to look at.

First look from @interviewmag editorial 📷 by @chriscolls More to come…

A photo posted by Gal Gadot (@gal_gadot) on

You know who else is not hard to look at? Heidi Klum, who has still got it, never lost it, and probably never will. She’s 42, and still kicking ass at creating unreasonable expectations for women.

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From that same magazine responsible for the Neville Longbottom photoshoot, Attitude, here’s Freddie Highmore.

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I know, you’re probably like, “Freddie Highmore? He looks familiar. Where do I know him from?”

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You know him from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Now don’t you feel squicky?

But don’t worry, fellas. Thanks to Trainwreck and the increasing number of female screenwriters, women’s expectations for men aren’t nearly as high. They apparently want an “emotional bodyguard,” so you can look like this:

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And do just as well with the ladies as these guys:

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Unless you’re a gay man, because then you’re f*cked because you have to live up to expectations set by this guy:

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