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Daddy Got the Rainman Suite, and He Sh*t All Over It

By Agent Bedhead | Posted Under Career Assessments | Comments (24)



vaughn1sm.jpg

Subject: Vince Vaughn, 40-year old American actor, comedian, and producer

Date of Assessment: January 14, 2011

Positive Buzzwords: Swingers, smooth-talking, money

Negative Buzzwords: Christmas movies, stagnation, monied

The Case: If I asked moviegoers to consider today’s subject, the vast majority would express the same sentiment in regard to today’s subject; that is, what the hell happened to Vince Vaughn? Babies, you know what I’m talking about when I refer to Vaughn’s promising performance as Trent “Double Down” Walker in Swingers. Vaughn virtually materialized out of thin air to great effect — women wanted him, and men wanted to be him. To put it quite simply, he was money… and he still is, but Vince’s definition of “money” has drastically changed over the past fifteen years. Instead of a descriptor of coolness, the term now refers to what’s rattling around in Vaughn’s very oversized pockets. Then again, the size of the pockets has changed as well. Nowadays and instead of his former figurative “larger than life” prowess, Vaughn’s physically bloated resemblance hints at excess in many different facets of his personal and professional life.

Yeah, I’ll get back to that last statement in just a bit.

The way I see it, there have been four rather distinct phases of Vince Vaughn’s acting career. The first phase (other than the anomaly known as The Lost World: Jurassic Park, during which his character ominously stated “Noble was last year. This year, I get paid.”) contained several attempts to break away from the infamous Trent Walker, but these projects were mostly indie flicks that didn’t do terribly well at the box office (The Locusts; Clay Pigeons; A Cool, Dry Place; Return to Paradise; South of Heaven, West of Hell; The Cell; The Prime Gig; Domestic Disturbance). Vaughn also performed competently enough as Norman Bates in Gus Van Sant’s Psycho remake, but neither the movie itself nor Vaughn’s take on the character were distinctive or impressive enough to necessitate the remake’s very existence. At this point, Vaughn switched gears and abandoned all hope of subsisting as a critical darling; instead, he transformed himself into a more commercially successful incarnation of the wise-talker that audiences loved. Somewhere along the way, most of these subsequent roles became indistinguishable from one another, and his shtick has worn thin.

As such, Vaughn embarked upon his “Frat Packer”-phase, which contained largely mindless humor within ensemble casts (Zoolander; Old School; Starsky & Hutch; Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story; Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy; Wedding Crashers). For a short amount of time after the frat-packing days, Vaughn briefly returned to his not-so-distant roots for a short period of time with a couple of amusing performances (Be Cool and Mr. & Mrs. Smith), a short yet acclaimed return to indie territory (Into the Wild), and a laudable effort to boost some of his fellow underdog comedians (Vince Vaughn’s Wild West Comedy Show). Finally, Vaughn arrived within his last and current phase, in which Hollywood decided he was a leading man [The Break-Up; Fred Claus (which he actually attempted to defend); Four Christmases; Couple’s Retreat]. As insufferable as all of these latter efforts have been to witness, they’ve also all been very successful in terms of box-office receipts. This weekend, The Dilemma shall probably continue this trend.

From the very beginning of his career, Vaughn’s never been a particularly talented actor but largely rode in upon a speeding train of charisma. The very best Vaughn performances are the ones where he’s either a wingman or smaller, standout player in movies based upon smart scripts that allow Vaughn to bounce off similarly-competent actors. In these roles, he oozes cool and talks fast, but his characters generally take a slightly self-effacing or self-damning turn towards the end. Of course, this list of characters includes Trent Walker (who revealed himself to be an absolute buffoon in his final “baby talk” diner scene) but also Clay Pigeons’s Lester Long (a serial killer who schmoozed around town a bit too long), Mr. & Mrs. Smith’s Eddie (who, upon the revelation that he lives with his mother, swiftly replies, “She happens to be a first-class lady!”), and Jeremy Grey of Wedding Crashers (who spends a great deal of the movie avoiding Isla Fisher’s “stage five, virgin, clinger” but falls for her duplicitous nature in the end). Within these characters, Vince can do very little wrong.

Prognosis: It must be stated that fans of the “old” Vince Vaughn aren’t necessarily disappointed in his decision to grab the money and run, so to speak. Also, let’s fog out another boozy elephant in the room because this assessment cannot conclude without the obligatory mention of Vaughn’s ballooning waistline. Neither of these issues would be damning enough to cause Vaughn fans to desert the guy. The problem is that Vince Vaughn is no longer funny; and although some of his lines might be considered vaguely amusing on the page, his delivery of these lines is stilted. Something has clearly gone wrong in those barely-opened eyes; he might very well be completely (yet functionally) drunk or medicated out of his mind. Most of all, Vaughn seems to have really lost his edge while, strangely, appearing completely aware and apathetic of this fact. His ability to entertain has stagnated.

One shining beacon of hope remains for those who once coveted this cool cat. Vaughn has signed on for Two Guns, an upcoming David O’Russell-helmed project. If this one displays even half of the ability to repair some self-inflicted damage to Vaughn’s career as The Fighter did for Mark Wahlberg, well, that’s gotta be good news. If nothing else, I welcome the chance for Vaughn to reclaim the ability to shout lines such as “I’m the asshole in this place, right? I’m the asshole? I’m outta here! I’m not eating here… I wouldn’t eat here… I’d never eat here anyway!” and still come off like a total sweetheart.

Agent Bedhead lives in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She and her little black heart can be found at agentbedhead.com.









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Comments

I'll admit I did occassionaly find him funny and sorta endearing in his "best" movies but that damn voice gets irritating as hell.

Posted by: Jean at January 14, 2011 3:39 PM

Bless your black heart! That was delivered with surgical precision and dead on. Vince Vaughn used to be the asshole whose goofy charm overcame his less pleasant characteristics. Now he just seems like a prick. Not a dick, not a dink, but a prick.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at January 14, 2011 3:40 PM

He bores me so much I don't know how you wrote this without killing yourself. From boredom.

That's why he and that boring lady who always looks the same were PERFECT together as a couple.

Posted by: Snuggiepants at January 14, 2011 3:41 PM

Solid assessment.

I remember seeing "Clay Pigeons" in the theater and kind of liking it. I also remember the first time I noticed just how bloated Vaughn was getting: "The Cell".

Other than those two films and "Swingers", of course, I don't think I've really seen more than "bits and pieces" of any of his other movies.

Posted by: Forbiddendonut at January 14, 2011 3:42 PM

An astute assessment as always. I think you are right that the bulging belly is connected with his loss of funny.

Posted by: Joan at January 14, 2011 3:47 PM

I'm always rooting for Vince Vaughn. I liked him in Old School and the other movies you listed from his "Frat Pack" period. However, I agree that he is NOT suitable to be playing the lead male in a romantic comedy. He's always struck me as the hilarious friend you have that's kind of a jerk, but taking him out in public is always an entertaining adventure because you have no idea what he might do.

Posted by: Siege at January 14, 2011 4:10 PM

I like Vince Vaughn lots and I kind of keep waiting for him to come around. So much so that I respond to a lot of deserved negative criticism with 'it wasn't so bad'. I can't even muster much hate for The Breakup. I'll uh...show myself out.

Posted by: Kristen at January 14, 2011 5:18 PM

Forbiddendonut ...YES me too "The Cell"...saw it in the theater and I was like, what happened to that guy from Swingers he's all puffy???
Also, Vaughn did bring one thing to the Norman Bates character...instead of just spying on girls in the motel, Vince's Norman spied on girls and masturbated at the same time. There is your justification for remaking a classic. That and Anne Heche.

Posted by: dagnabbit at January 14, 2011 5:27 PM

He seems to me like a less talented, pudgy, misshapened Diedrich Bader.

But he also seems to have made some arcane faustian deal to steal almost all of Bader's success!

Posted by: Murderbot at January 14, 2011 5:32 PM

Ooooh, Diedrich Bader! Where has he been?

Posted by: Kristen at January 14, 2011 5:42 PM

I was shocked to realize in the subject line that he's only 40. That says it all really.

Posted by: Angeleno Ewok at January 14, 2011 6:54 PM

But aren't those Frat Packer movies so very very entertaining? How can you not LOVE Zoolander or Dodgeball?

I agree, he needs to be the sidekick or part of an ensemble.

Posted by: KC at January 14, 2011 7:06 PM

I really like him in A Cool, Dry Place.

Posted by: jmflynny at January 14, 2011 7:42 PM

Man. I have still not seen Swingers. And I've heard the line "You are so money, and you dont even know it," like a hundred times back from when I worked at a bar. I guess that's what I'll be doing tonite.

Posted by: Muteki at January 14, 2011 8:29 PM

I must be the only person alive who loves Vince Vaughn but hated Swingers.

Posted by: Poptart at January 14, 2011 8:49 PM

No mention of Made (2001)? Definitely one of my favorite VV performances (also opposite Favreau) if one I can barely stand to watch. It is placed in the category of movies I must immediately show anyone who has never seen it but refuse to watch for enjoyment. VV's character is so perfectly played that he rips the emotion right out of me. Unfortunately that emotion is pure hate. I hate his character and get violently angry with him.

Definitely a flick I loved from him and a form I wish he would return to.

Posted by: James at January 14, 2011 9:23 PM

Return to Paradise was an absolutely heartbreaking movie. I had to watch and analyze it for a philosophy class in undergrad, and I ended up loving it - highly recommend.

Posted by: BzzyBzz at January 14, 2011 9:58 PM

I've always disliked this guy. Just irrational levels of dislike.

Posted by: Figgy at January 14, 2011 11:23 PM

Swingers was the opening, and sadly, the pinnacle of VV's film career. Terrific, very good film.

This guy has never failed to disappoint ever since. BUT there's always the hint, a glimpse of his gift no matter the quality of the overall product. Four Christmases, which should not be even available for your viewing except as background while running the vacuum, has it's only good moments via Vince. Same with his other Christmas turkeys. He needs to take his career seriously and make an effort. I'm telling you, he could have been a contender.

Posted by: SittingPat at January 15, 2011 10:40 AM

In Chicago, he is becoming this generation's Jim Belushi. The idiot celeb that you know is going to show up and get his face on camera at tomorrow's Bears-Seahawks playoff game, and then my dad asks me who he is and I say "never mind."

Note that when Jim Belushi appears on screen at the same game, my dad will look over and say "didn't Belushi die??" So Vince is at least a half step up.

Posted by: Confucius Jackson at January 15, 2011 12:05 PM

I can't help but laugh at Wedding Crashers. He was also in Rudy. He's a ridiculously lanky looking string bean in that movie--so young. Yeah...so there ya go. Not much to add except it's pretty disappointing he looks so squishy now and his movies are so...Meh.

Posted by: Sar at January 15, 2011 6:00 PM

I fucking hated Vaughn in Mr & Mrs. Smith. Unnecessary character with bad gags that were out of place with the humor of the rest of the film. Oh, and there's no suspension of disbelief stretching far enough to make me think any incarnation of Brad Pitt is going to be best friends with that guy.

Posted by: valerie at January 15, 2011 11:20 PM

for the love of god. why does no one ever mention "made"? i laugh like hell everytime i watch that movie

Posted by: wicked whisper at January 16, 2011 10:41 AM

Vince Vaughn's character in Thumbsucker was hands down the best part of that movie.

Posted by: Blank at January 17, 2011 5:30 PM