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The Five Least Compelling Number One Movies of 2010

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Box Office Round-Ups | Comments (18)



resident-evil-after-life-poster.jpg

5. The American: Last week’s number one movie benefited by a major lack of competition (Machete, which dropped 63 percent this week, and Going the Distance, which held on to the 5 spot for the second week in a row) and a little marketing misdirection: Most people expected a cool George Clooney hit man movie. What it was, as Dan’s review suggested, was an art film. It was basically the hit man version of Solaris, and knowing the tone, you knew exactly how the movie would end before the opening credits had finished.

4. Nightmare on Elm Street: Another movie that had little competition (Furry Vengeance was the only other wide opener that weekend), Elm Street put up $32 million, mostly from apathetic horror fans who wanted to see how badly they screwed it up. Fortunately, the Elm Street was so forgettable, it wasn’t able to displace our memories of the original.

3. Dear John: The first non-Avatar number one film of the year, it’s only competition was From Paris with Love, a movie somehow even more forgettable than Dear John. Quick: Which 2010 movie starred Amanda Seyfried? Letters to Juliet or Dear John? Trick question: They both did. Which starred Charming Potato? I’ve already forgotten the question.

2. Takers: This one was the armored truck movie starring Matt Dillon that wasn’t called Armored. That’s the only residual memory of the movie I have, though I reviewed it only three weeks ago.

1. Resident Evil: Afterlife: Afterlife managed $27 million this weekend, thanks to three factors: 1) there were no other wide releases, and even the holdovers (like The American) weren’t compelling; 2) it had the benefit of 3D ticket prices; and 3) there are a few people, like TK (who will have the review tomorrow), who continue to stick with the franchise out of some sort of guilty pleasure loyalty.









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Comments

who cares I have been waiting all weekend for the true blood finale.

Posted by: blacksred at September 12, 2010 6:40 PM

I'm shooting a movie that's going to be way more entertaining than any of those. True story. I'll try not to sprain my wrist patting myself on the back.

Posted by: HappyGobo at September 12, 2010 7:26 PM

Amen, blacksred.

Posted by: Notanarc at September 12, 2010 7:51 PM

I know it's not saying a lot, but Afterlife was easily the best film in the Resident Evil series. I know: it's like saying your dog won the world's ugliest dog contest. It's an accomplishment, but one you shouldn't be particularly proud of.

Posted by: Robert at September 12, 2010 7:53 PM

When you asked "Which 2010 movie starred Amanda Seyfried?", the first thing I thought was "Chloe," perhaps because I am a perv and she takes her clothes off over and over in that film.

Posted by: Hector at September 12, 2010 8:22 PM

These movies are definitely not compelling and do not deserve to be on the #1 spot. It's a shame that movies like these are put out there to the public and is considered to be a form of entertainment.

Posted by: Internet Surfer at September 12, 2010 10:31 PM

Screw you. Resident Evil rock!

Posted by: YesPlease at September 13, 2010 3:25 AM

"there are a few people, like TK, who continue to stick with the franchise out of some sort of guilty pleasure loyalty"

Sounds like marriage counselling for the mail order bride brigade.

Posted by: peanut at September 13, 2010 5:24 AM

YesPlease,

Do you have a thing against rocks, or just those of the Resident Evil variety? Either way, you should find things that are more fun to hate. Like the Dallas Cowboys.

Posted by: Kballs at September 13, 2010 8:01 AM

And people wonder why I don't go to the movies....

Mostly it's because most movies lately suck.

Posted by: Kahntahmp at September 13, 2010 8:03 AM

Revel in the LCD and keep pining for quality; the clock is ticking.

Insert brief clip of PF's "Time".

You are being drained of essential life fluids.

Just say no to bad cinema. It shortens your cord.

Posted by: Recondite at September 13, 2010 9:36 AM

NOES was memorable only in that it spent a lot of time really hammering the "Freddy is a hilarious child rapist who raped lots of kids with rapey rape" thing that the original kindly brushed over, really pissing me off.

Posted by: Courtney at September 13, 2010 9:36 AM

Mm. Not a big fan of Ali Larter as Claire. As a fan of the games, that just doesn't...compute, somehow.

Posted by: Roll Equals Cute at September 13, 2010 10:44 AM

2010 was the Year of the Seyfried, it's true. Those wide-ass fish eyes followed you wherever you went.

Posted by: seed at September 13, 2010 10:45 AM

All of them grossed more than Scott Pilgrim did in three weeks.

God. Fucking. Damn. It.

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Posted by: Mac nick at January 23, 2011 1:32 PM

I know it's not saying a lot, but Afterlife was easily the best film in the Resident Evil series. I know: it's like saying your dog won the world's ugliest dog contest. It's an accomplishment, but one you shouldn't be particularly proud of.

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