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The 10 Most Profitable 80's Remakes

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Box Office Round-Ups | Comments (14)



clash-of-the-titans2.jpg

It looks like the 80’s remake trend is about to run its course. After the commercial failures of Arthur, Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark, Conan the Barbarian and Fright Night this year, two more were released over the weekend, and while both films may ultimately reap a profit, it won’t be a large one. Footloose opened at number two this weekend, but overall, it was a very weak one at the box-office. It’s $16.1 million looks to eventually put it ahead of its $24 million budget (particularly once worldwide figures are accounted for), but it’s not a big win for Paramount, and hardly worth sullying the original over. Still, it fared better than this weekend’s other 80’s remake, The Thing, which pulled down a meager $8.7 million. The budget was low, but Universal won’t turn much — if any — profit on this one, either. That’s 0 for 6 in 2011, unless I’m forgetting an 80’s remake (there are so many these days, it’s hard to keep up).

That should at least prevent Hollywood from remaking other 80’s movies with Kenny Loggins’ dominated soundtracks. Sorry, Over the Top remake. The trend wasn’t a complete failure for Hollywood, however. Before they exhausted it, they did turn a buck or three on these ten titles, the most profitable ten of the bunch

Worldwide Gross and Budget are in parenthesis, respectively.


1. Clash of the Titans ($493 million) ($125 million) = $368 million profit

2. Karate Kid (Projected: $359million) ($40 million) = $319 million profit

3. My Bloody Valentine ($100 million) ($15 million) = $85 million profit

4. Nightmare on Elm Street ($115 million) ($35 million) = $80 million profit

5. Friday the 13th ($91 million) ($18 million) = $73 million profit

6. The A-Team ($177 million) ($110 million) = $67 million profit

7. The Dukes of Hazzard ($111 million) ($50 million) = $61 million profit

8. Fame ($77 million) ($18 million) = $59 million profit

9. Prom Night ($57 million) ($20 million) = $37 million profit

10. Miami Vice ($163 million) ($135 million) = $28 million profit

You can see from those numbers up top why they’re making a sequel to Clash of the Titans, despite the fact that it was not well received and despite the fact that it barely edged out a profit stateside. Apparently, the rest of the world loves shitty 3D.

Let’s put a nail in the 80’s remake coffin now, shall we?

The weekend’s other new entry, The Big Year, fared even worse than the 80’s remakes, although it featured one of the biggest stars of the 1980s in Steve Martin. He clearly doesn’t have the drawing power he once did. The Big Year opened in eighth place, with only $3 million. That’s on a $40 million budget (presumably most of that went to the talent, because there’s very little in the film otherwise to justify the cost). Fox had a hell of a time marketing the The Big Year and, ultimately, couldn’t bury the bird-watching angle deep enough.

As far as holdovers go, Real Steel held on to number one, with around $16.5 million, to bring its total to a little over $50 million. That’s a victory in name only, as $50 million after 10 days on a $110 million movie with Hugh Jackman and fucking robots can’t be considered a success. It’s going to need to do well worldwide (and it is, so far) to recoup the budget and marketing. At number four, The Ides of March held decently, adding nearly another $8 million (it’s nearly doubled its budget in two weeks). In at number five, Moneyball may be the sleeper hit of the fall, as it approaches $60 million overall.

In limited release this weekend, the once mighty Joel Schumacher continues his descent into obscurity: His Trespass, with Nicole Kidman and Nic Cage, only mustered $18,000 in 10 theaters, enough to assure that it won’t go much wider. I don’t see how it even beats the $183,000 gross of his last bomb, Twelve. Meanwhile, Texas Killing Fields, from Michael Mann’s daughter, Ami Canaan Mann, didn’t fare too well, either, despite having Sam Worthington and Jeffrey Dean Morgan in its cast. It opened with $9,600 in three theaters, hardly enough worth rolling it out. However, Pedro Almodóvar’s The Skin I Live In, with Antonio Banderas, did moderate business, making $231,000 in six theaters.









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Comments

Prefer this over foreign movie remakes to be honest with you. That is to say, foreign remakes that are remade for people that can't read subtitles.

Posted by: googergieger at October 17, 2011 12:49 AM

Never know, Bill Murray may be up for another Caddyshack...

Posted by: Jerry at October 17, 2011 2:19 AM

What's next? Both 80's movie remakes and comic book adaptations have waned both commercially and critically this year, so it begs the question. Hollywood's dipped it's toes into video game adaptations, but the movies so far have been god awful. It's been said a million times, but one good video game adaptation could open the flood gates.

Posted by: Neil at October 17, 2011 2:21 AM

The rule of thumb is 2.5x the budget = breakeven (after splits and p&a) so a couple of these movies weren't even close to profitable.

Posted by: Anom at October 17, 2011 3:35 AM

@Neil: There is a Mass Effect movie in the works. If done right, that could be your game changer.

Posted by: FabMax at October 17, 2011 8:22 AM

It makes me sad that the Fright Night remake is categorized as a failure. The original was campy and great and the remake was a solid effort with a lot of charm. And Colin Farrell!

And who was the marketing genius who decided the remake did not merit a Halloween DVD release?

Posted by: klingonfree at October 17, 2011 9:49 AM

The remade Fame?! Why?

Posted by: Laura at October 17, 2011 10:18 AM

...Hugh Jackman and fucking robots...

I'll finance that one.

Posted by: admin at October 17, 2011 10:48 AM

I'm not sure if this was intentional or simply a mistake, but "The Thing" got zero stars in the wire service list of movie capsules in my newspaper (fuck off, I'm old school like that) on Friday. I don't think I've ever seen zero there before.

Is it THAT bad?

*eagerly awaits Pajiba disembowelment*

Posted by: , at October 17, 2011 10:54 AM

Neither The Thing nor Conan the Barbarian are remakes. The Thing is a prequel to the 1982 film (which stupidly has the same name, giving the impression of being a remake). You might as well call Predators a remake of Predator.

Conan is a new film featuring the character created in 1932 which has a couple of elements from the 1982 film. Sure, it still has the stupid quest for revenge against the warlord who slaughtered his village, murdered his father, and took his faddah's sowahd, but it has none of the characters, locations, story or themes from the film beyond that. You might as well call Chris Nolan's Batman films remakes of Burton's.

Posted by: Al Harron at October 17, 2011 12:02 PM

I am not being sarcastic in saying this: Lion King 3D is clearly the actual sleeper hit of the fall. 3D re-releases of older movies have never done that well, it cost next to nothing to remaster, and it's made more than $90 million.

Unfortunately, the message Hollywood has taken from The Lion King's success is "more re-releases!" and not "audiences will flock to a good movie, even if it is decades old, if the other options are total crap."

Posted by: Artemis at October 17, 2011 12:55 PM

What about Halloween 2007? It made $80,253,908. I'm not sure how much it cost but I can't imagine it'd be over $30,000,000. That would leave about $50,000,000 profit (at least based on the above scale).

Posted by: Mike at October 17, 2011 1:16 PM

Remake whatever else you want, Hollywood, but don't you dare touch Over The Top! It is sacred above all else.

"I drive truck, break arms, and arm wrestle. It's what I love to do. it's what I do best."

"Being number one is everything. There is no second place. Second sucks."

"When I get to the table, that person, I don't care who they are, they're my mortal enemy. I hate them."

"The world meets nobody halfway. When you want something, you gotta take it."

Posted by: DarthCorleone at October 17, 2011 7:40 PM

It's the 80's TV show remakes that kill me. I don't care how awesome we thought they were back then, they suck. Love Boat?

Posted by: Protoguy at October 18, 2011 1:35 AM