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August 25, 2008 |

By Dustin Rowles | Box Office Round-Ups | August 25, 2008 |

12. The Rocker ( $3 million): Poor Rainn Wilson. Dude just can’t catch a break, or a decent script. If you exclude his one scene in Juno, Wilson’s box-office performances so far (The Last Mimzy, My Super Ex-Girlfriend) portends only one thing, and I hope his eventual “The Office” spin-off is better than “Joey.” At least he’s still got Transformers: The Revenge of the Fallen in the works.

8. The Longshots ($4 million): Prisco will have our much-anticipated The Longshots review up this afternoon, and I’ll let him do the honor of drying up those expectant panties.

5. Star Wars: The Clone Wars ($5.6 million; $24 million): This … er … bodes well for George Lucas’ upcoming Star Wars television series, which is set to take place in between episodes III and IV. Does anyone know if Lucas has put the Star Wars brand on funeral caskets yet?

Also, I feel sorry for the kids whose first taste of Lucas and Star Wars was Episodes I-III. That’s my guess as to why Fanboys has been delayed for so long now. The 18-24 year old demographic are test-screening it, and all the response cards are like, “Ummm … why are, like, these geeks so, you know, hellbent on traveling all the way to Skywalker Ranch to steal an early copy of Phantom Menace? I, like, saw it, and OMG, it was, like, so the opposite of fetch. Like, gag me with a rocket ship.” (Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. And yes, my “O.C.” girl does still live in 1995).

4. The Dark Knight($10 million; $489 million):I finally got around to seeing The Dark Knight for a second time last week, and not only does it hold up incredibly well, but the second viewing allows you to focus on the film’s political overtones. I’m not going to go into them, as enough people have written about it already to render anything I have to say fairly bland and moot, but my God: Once you sort of realize that Two Face represents America, this whole second, metaphorical movie just opens up, and you can spend literally minutes trying to get inside the Nolan Brothers heads. Then you sort of get tired of thinking about it and you’re, like, ‘How good was Heath Ledger? I know, right?’

3. Death Race ($12 million): Well, there you go: With Death Race, Paul W.S. Anderson is officially zero for nine. I think it’s time he gives up that name. Hey! Has anyone ever seen Paul W.S. Anderson and Uwe Boll at the same place at the same time? No, of course you haven’t. But it’s not because they are the same person, it’s because they’ve been warned that if that amount of suck were to ever exist in the same room, a hole in the bottom of the ocean would open up and Keanu Reeves would have to prevent an alien robot from destroying the world. I’ve actually seen the teaser trailer for the Anderson/Boll apocalypse. Check it out:

2. The House Bunny ($15 million): My position here at Pajiba affords me the opportunity to receive a lot of great emails from folks who often write to tell me how much they appreciate the site and how, in their estimation, they’ve found a nice little Internet home for themselves. One of my favorites came this weekend from a dear reader who must have loved my House Bunny review so much that he sent me a lovely message, noting, “It’s amazing to me that you were allowed to procreate.” Thanks, man! It is amazing, isn’t it! They don’t hand one of these baby-seed spitting devices to anyone, you know! I had to write my Congressman, fill out a ton of forms, stand in line for hours, and even then, I had to slip a few dollars to the issuer. And once you get your device, there’s no guaranteeing you’ll find anyone willing to let you insert it into the appropriate receptacle. I had to spend a whole $12 on girly drinks before I was finally allowed to procreate. It’s a miracle anyone has the patience for it all.

1. Tropic Thunder ($16 million; $65 million): Fun fact: According to Wikipedia, Ben Stiller got the idea for Tropic Thunder after filming a small role in Empire of the Sun. “Stiller wanted to make a film based on the actors he knew who considered themselves ‘self-important.’” Ironically, next to that paragraph in the Wikipedia entry there is a pull quote from Stiller himself, reacting to the film being called a spoof: “”No, I feel the tone of the movie is its own thing. I think there are elements of satire, but I don’t think it should be categorized just as that. There are elements of parody in it, but obviously I don’t think it’s just that. I feel like hopefully it’s its own thing, which has a lot of familiar stuff that we are playing off of.” So, Stiller thinks that Tropic Thunder transcends spoof, parody, and satire - and that the movie defies categorization, those pissant labels that people try to slap on his genius? Tropic Thunder is “its own thing,” nothing like anything else you’ve ever experienced and nothing like lesser comedians have ever created.


Take a Long Walk Off a Short Pier

The Weekly Box Office Round-Up / Dustin Rowles

Box Office Round-Ups | August 25, 2008 |

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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